And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

The Sorrow of Ritsu Namine

"Ritsu, dear! You're gonna be late if you don't get up! I'm not gonna tell you again! Now, I'm leaving for work. I won't be home until quite late, so don't wait up for me. And please, try to have a good day. Alright, Ritsu?"

He heard his mother's desperate attempt to get him to school. He didn't see it though. His eyes were still closed, oblivious to the harsh light of morning. Still using his ears, he heard her clumsily slam the door as usual.

Only then did he slowly push himself into a sitting position, opening his eyes slightly. He sneezed. His cat, Choco, had slept next to his head, causing his allergies to act up. Sighing, he gently shoved the snoozing feline off of his futon. He then folded it, set it in the closet, and stood up to stretch. He reached high up in the air, then down to his toes, and yawned.

He quickly ran to the washroom, splashed some water on his face, and ran back to the main room of his small apartment to put on his plain public school uniform. He frowned at the few number of pleats in the skirt, but put it on anyways, along with his sailor uniform top. The scratchy fabric rubbed against his skin as he quickly checked to make sure he had everything in his small school bag. He dashed back to the washroom, briskly brushed his teeth, and slipped on his bulky school loafers. As he bounded to the door and began to turn the knob, Choco meowed, sorrowfully.

"Sorry, Choco. I've got to stop at the store after work and get you food. There's no more here." He lightly bowed at the cat in apology, and quickly turned the doorknob, leaping out of the door and dashing down the steps to school.

No breakfast... he thought, his mind clouded with the thought of a long day and barely anything to eat. Not even a bento box. Maybe Teto will give me something. He ran down the street, passing large suburban houses that were much, much nicer than his and his mom's apartment. He pushed the grim thoughts out of his mind and tried to think of the good things. Like, the fact that the sun rose everyday. And that beautiful flowers can bloom from were dirt used to be.

"Ritsu! Hey!"

And that he had great friends.

Kasane Teto ran out of one of the big houses. "What's the rush? We're close enough to school so that we won't be late. Relax and enjoy the morning!" She gave him a hug. "So, how are you doing?"

"I'm alright. I didn't eat any breakfast, and I didn't have enough time to make my lunch. And I don't even have enough money to buy one."

"It's alright! I've got an extra lunch. I figured this would happen! Don't worry, Ritsu. Life will go on!" She made an impressive flourish in the air with her hands.

He laughed a bit at her optimism, and then smiled along with her.

Teto spotted Ruko, walking a bit ahead of them.

"Ruko! Hey!"

Ruko stopped walking and allowed them to catch up to her. As they reached her, Ritsu could see the morning tiredness in her eyes.

"I'm outta coffee." She held up an empty thermos and turned it over, showing them how empty it was. "I'm tired." She leaned on Teto.

"I'm sorry, Ruko. I know mornings are hard for you." She pet the sleepy girl, who reacted like a cat and began to rub her face on Teto's. Ritsu smiled at them both. Suddenly, he felt something hard hit the back of his head. He turned around.

"Useless cross-dressing boy! Why don't you wear the normal boy's uniform?" Leon teased. He threw another rock that hit Ritsu's face.

Ruko immediately snapped awake.

"You bastard!" She chucked her thermos at him, but he easily dodged it and laughed.

"You've got such awful aim, stupid hermaphrodite!"

Ruko's confidence snapped at that statement. Ritsu was used to the teasing, but it was far too taboo to speak about Ruko's gender. Her eyes began to water.

"C-come on guys, we don't have time to waste with this moron." She turned on her heel and proceeded to walk to school. Teto looked like she was going to say something, but instead she closed her mouth and scowled at Leon, sending him waves of hate with her eyes. He laughed at her and let it roll off of his back. And from there on, Ritsu's day only got worse.

Ritsu sat alone in homeroom. She only had one in there friend, Neru, because Teto and Ruko were in a different class. And even worse, Neru was always late, so until she got there, Ritsu had to either deal with being tortured by his classmates, or being completely ignored. He would rather be ignored. But today, the bullying was worse than ever.

"Hey, are you a gay, too? Or do you just cross-dress? Either way, you're totally useless, and nobody wants you alive. You should go up to the roof and jump." Miki and Nana Macne stood over him at his desk, tormenting him. The insults stabbed like daggers, but Ritsu tried to persevere. He tuned himself out from their harsh words, and thought about why they would feel the need to say such awful things to him. Was it because he was simply different? Were they for some reason jealous of him? Were they just evil people? Maybe there was something honestly wrong with him, and he deserved to be shunned by society. But there were people who loved him for who he was, so maybe there was something simply wrong with society in general?

"Everyone sit, class is starting." Their teacher directed suddenly.

Everyone sat in their seats, as Neru ran in the door.

"I'm not that late, am I?"

Lunchtime. One of Ritsu's favorite parts of the day. Ruko, Teto, and Neru sat around him at his desk, chattering. Ruko was still shaken by Leon's comment earlier, so she was quieter than usual, but she was still happy, and that lifted Ritsu's mood.

Neru fiddled with her cellphone. "I'm getting hate mail. It's mostly for you, Ritsu, and they send it to me cause you don't have a cell phone. Morons. Why do people hate other people?" She scowled as she deleted the messages without reading them.

Ritsu gratefully ate the lunch Teto made. It was really sweet, and had some pretty expensive looking foods in it. He ate silently, remembering Miki's comment from earlier. Should he just kill himself?

"I love you, kid!" Haku appeared out of nowhere and hugged him from behind. She was their upperclassmen, but she loved to come and visit them during breaks. "You're looking cuter than usual today, kid! Oh, hey, did any of you catch that anime last night? It was amazing!"

Neru scowled at her. "I didn't know you were an otaku!"

"I'm not! It's just impossible to avoid seeing anime on television these days! And some of it's pretty good honestly!"

Lunch really was the best time of day for Ritsu. During this time, he really knew the meaning of strength in numbers. Time with all of his friends was the best, but he knew that after class started again, there would be more teasing.

After school, everyone went their separate ways. Ritsu went home to change out of his uniform and went back out, to go to work. He entered the convenient store were he was a cashier. He was grateful for the job, considering the only reason he had it was because the guy who hired him really thought he was a girl. I feel deceitful, having this job... but he went, anyways, because he really needed the money. It was an okay job, though it didn't pay well at all and the work was repetitive, but Ritsu was happy to get whatever he could.

After working for three hours, he was tired and needed to get home, but he still had to work one more. Night had fallen quickly. Ritsu was sweeping the floors in his free time, because of the lack of customers. He was humming a song he knew well, when the automatic doors opened and a customer walked in. He turned around and was about to greet them, but he stopped short. The customer was none other than Leon.

"Cross-dressing boy? You work here?" He started to laugh coldly. "Still dressed like a girl? Moron! When are you going to kill yourself?" Ritsu's boss overheard Leon and came out from the back of the store.

"Cross-dressing...boy?" He turned red with rage and embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, B-boss! But if I hadn't lied then-"

"Get out! I don't need a tranny driving off customers!"

That was it. The last straw. Ritsu burst into tears on the spot. He dropped the broom he had been using and ran out of the store. There was no looking back now. He couldn't take it anymore. He had been a burden for everyone.

He was the one who had caused his mom to work overtime.

He was the one who couldn't even feed his cat, because he barely had the money.

He was the one who let Ruko get hurt as well.

He was the one who everyone hated, because he was different.

And then, he had caused everyone to worry.

He was the one who had caused it all, by being alive.

So now, he was going to take everyone's advice, and he was just going to give up.

And die.

Hey there. I just wanted to say that this is a bit more dark than the other story I've been writing (The Everyday Adventures) and I hope you liked it so far. If after reading this story, you're feeling down, you might want to go read that, considering how it's much happier. There's only going to be one more chapter in this story, so I hope you look forward to it. Please review!

And here's some questions for you. If you saw someone being bullied, would you step in to help? Do you believe everyone is equal, no matter who they are? Don't you think people who hate are awful, even though sometime in your life, you've probably hated too?

Be wonderful. ~Meimei

The tongue like a sharp knife... Kills without drawing blood. ~Buddha