A/N: Hi everyone who may or may not have previously read 'Scott and Knives vs. the Arcade'. Before I start up the sequel here are the games and other forms of pop culture that were referenced during the last chapter of that story. You can skip this if you want to though. The moves 'dark aura' and 'rising sun' were both used in Kingdom Hearts. Scott being stabbed by his own sword was meant to be a reference to the way the marvel comics character Elektra dies. The number 4 that Todd carves into Scott's chest was a reference to the Fantastic Four (the actor that played the second evil ex was in that movie). The 'S' that Scott carves into Todd's chest references Superman. The actor that played Todd played Superman in 'Superman Returns'. The phoenix down was a shout out to Final Fantasy 10. The power of courage was meant to be a reference to the triforce of courage. Ok no more stalling. Let the story begin!
Disclaimer: You know the drill. I own nothing.
"Hi everyone and welcome to Scott Pilgrim vs. the Indigo Prophecy (And Other Things). As you already know my name is Wallace Wells and I'm here to basically tell you what's up."
Wallace Wells
Scott's ex roommate.
Played no significant role in the last story.
Nearly believed to be the story's antagonist.
Did we mention he's gay?
"Wallace! ? What are you doing? The recap is my job," Scott complained.
"The writer owed me for leaving me out of the last story," Wallace said to him.
"Wasn't that whole ordeal deemed unavoidable?" Scott asked, but Wallace ignored him and began.
"When this whole adventure began Scott here was just your average slacker."
Fun fact: Scott still is your average slacker.
"He was dating a girl named Knives Chau at the time, which wouldn't have been so bad had she not been 17 years old."
Knives Chau
Now 18 years old
Loves music and has a major crush on Scott Pilgrim
"Correction; HAD a major crush on Scott Pilgrim," Wallace said emphasizing the word 'had'.
Wait! ? What! ?
"Yeah! ? What! ?" Scott asked in surprise.
"Yes Scott. Knives has finally gotten over you," Wallace said to him.
"That quickly?"
"It's been one year Scott," Wallace dead panned. Sometimes Scott could be so clueless. "None of us know who her new boyfriend is though. She's been trying to keep it a secret from everybody. That little detail will have to wait till later though. Moving on, no sooner did Scott start dating Knives; he met a girl by the name of Ramona Flowers.
Ramona Flowers
The literal girl of Scott's dreams
"It was love at first sight… for Scott that is. After some rather awkward and near borderline embarrassing introductions the two went out on a date and just a while after that Scott found himself being attack by Ramona's first evil ex-boyfriend. Turns out she had seven evil ex-boyfriends."
"Exes," Ramona corrected him.
"Whatever. The point is that in every relationship people come with baggage, which in Ramona's case tried to kill Scott every five minutes. He fought and killed all of them though; even dying once in the process but came back to life thanks to an extra life. A few weeks later…"
"Stoooooop! Stop!" Kim shouted at the top of her voice.
"Kim? What are you yelling about?" Wallace calmly asked her.
"You're telling this recap worse than Scott did last story. It's boring us all to death!"
"Come on Kim. No one can get bored to death," Wallace declared.
"Look," she said pointing at the floor. Julie was lying there on her back.
Julie Powers
Health down by 80%
"Well if you think you're so good Kim. Let's see you do a better job," he said.
"Don't worry. I will," she said walking over to her drum set.
Kim Pine
Drummer for Sex Bob-omb
Rating: PBD (pretty but deadly)
Stephen Stills and Neil Nordegraf both got up and picked up their respective instruments.
"You guys are gonna sing it?" Wallace asked.
"Yep," Kim said putting on some gloves and then grabbing her drum sticks.
"This is Scott Pilgrim's precious little life," Stephen began. "It was rather boring and devoid of much strife. Then one day he met the girl of his dreams, but little did he know," he stopped and let Kim play her drums a little. "There was more to her than it seems!" They all played their instruments as loud as possible.
Scott Pilgrim vs. The Indigo Prophecy (And Other Things)
Scott was in love with this girl
But she had a secret that nearly made him hurl
She had seven evil exes, but that wasn't all
They wanted to kill Scott once and for all!
(instrumental)
Each evil ex proved to be worse than the last
Scott was nearly outmatched by these blasts from the past
But Ramona's love was on the line
So he fought them all one at a time!
Yeaaaaaah!
The first was some sort of demon
The second was a movie star and a total heathen
The third was a total superman
The fourth had us shouting 'you're not even a man'!
(Instrumental)
Turns out Ramona had been a little bi-curious
Unfortunately her ex was a little bi-furious
A fight broke out and when the dust cleared
Things got even worse than what Scott feared
The next two guys were Asian twins
Scott took them down and claimed two wins
He then faced off against the leader of the exes
Then the whole thing turned into a…ummm…
Battle of the sexes!
"Hold on. Battle of the sexes," Scott interrupted them.
"I'm running out of rhymes. Sue me why don't ya," Stephen said and went back to the song.
Scott fought Gideon and tragically died
However, no one cried
Cause Scott came back to life for one last attack
He won the fight and got Ramona's love back!
(instrumental)
THIS
IS
SCOTT
PILGRIM'S
PRECIOUS
LITTLE
LIFEEEEEEEE!
WHOAAAAAAAAA!
"So what did you guys think?" Stephen asked his friends.
"That was… well the music was alright, but the lyrics could use work… like a lot of work," Wallace commented.
"Everybody's a critic," Stephen mumbled.
"So anyway," Wallace said picking up where Sex Bob-omb finished, "A lot has happened since the conclusion of 'Scott Pilgrim vs. The World' and its follow up 'Scott Pilgrim and Knives Chau vs. The Arcade', which saw the return of Todd from the grave, but that's another story. Since then Knives has turned 18 and is now attending College. Like I said earlier she even has a boyfriend that isn't Scott," he said with emphasis on those three words. "In other news Sex Bob-omb is finally starting to get noticed in the musical industry, but not for their lyrics. Apparently Neil recorded the back ground music they played during Scott's second fight with Todd. He sent it to some big music company and they liked what they heard. The only problem is that they want the next song to have lyrics, which as you just witnessed they suck at. As for Ramona, she's recently received a promotion for being the quickest delivery girl Amazon's ever had, which would never had been possible if Scott's mind hadn't been an incredibly convenitet short cut/plot device through sub space. And last and most often least we have Scott. Not much has really happened for him, but if he's still with Ramona he must be doing something right."
"Hey!" Scott shouted. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"I mean you've left quite a chain of exes behind yourself Scott. Who's to say they won't form their own league and come to kill Ramona?" He asked.
"You do realize that I'm one of Scott's exes?" Kim asked Wallace.
"What's your point?"
"You think I'm capable of killing someone?' She asked tightening her hold on her drumsticks. Everyone in the room burst out laughing at her question. "What?" She asked.
"Are you capable of killing someone?" Stephen barely managed to get out because he was laughing so hard. "Have you forgotten what you did to Todd's evil minions? You slit one of their throats with a drum stick and cut the rest of their heads off with your drum's symbol. What did you do to those things anyway?" He asked while laughing.
"Would you like to find out?" She asked holding up her drum stick. The whole room fell silent. "That's what I thought," she said taking a seat.
"Soooo," Scott said. "Just pull up a chair, grab a bag of popcorn, and get ready for the most violent and hilarious edition in the Scott Pilgrim franchise."
"Um Scott. We're kind of out of time," Wallace said to him.
"What do you mean we're out of time?" He asked him.
"I mean because we spent so much time with the recap, AGAIN, we don't have any more to actually move on with the story."
"Well whose fault is that! ?" Scott yelled at him.
"Yours for bringing Sex Bob-omb down here to practice," Wallace countered. Scott opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out.
"Burned!" Stephen shouted.
A/N: Sorry if this prologue wasn't as funny as the one in the first story. I promise you that the story itself will indeed be better. See ya then!