A/N: Alright! I realized I'd made a teeeeensy little mistake and I wished to edit it, so this is the same chapter but with a few edits. Again, this is the first fic I've written in quite some time, and I hope that this pleases some fans out there. And, of course, I still do not own Hellsing.

With a gasp and a startled, strangled cry, Seras Victoria shot up in her bed, promptly slamming her forehead into the lid of her coffin. Hissing in pain, the vampress rubbed at her head, vaguely thankful that her undead prowess would at least keep her pale skin from forming a giant bruise. Having thus reached a solid state of consciousness, she groped for the button that rose the disturbing contraption she took residence in and awaited the soft glow of her lamp in jittery silence. Once the mechanism stopped, Seras swung her legs around in a display of supernatural speed that the vampress was not aware of, feet now dangling a couple inches from the stone floor. For several moments, the young vampire could do nothing more than shake, elbows resting against her thighs, head buried in her upturned hands. Dry sobs and gasps escaped her slightly parted lips, neither any louder than a soft whisper. Her sobs were dry, cheeks clear of tears, her body too dried and denied of blood to produce any external fluids.

Her sudden hysterical episode lasted mere moments, ending nearly as soon as it had begun. With a solid, albeit slow, breath the vampress stood from the bed, all previous shaking left behind as she did so. Having left the electronically heated bed, Seras was cold. Her simple black nightie, reaching just past mid-thigh, and her bare feet did little to help the ever-present cold that seemed to soak into her very bones. Having already decided that sleep was not to be reclaimed, Seras sighed and donned her robe (a simple thing; bright pink with purple flowers speckled across the unbelievably soft fabric; a gift from Walter on her last birthday) and matching slippers, slipping her bag of toiletries beneath her arm. She did not need to glance at the clock ticking away on the wall just across from her to know that it was around three PM and, wearing only her ridiculous robe, she ventured out into the hallway rubbing her crimson eyes as though to rid herself from the last clinging tendrils of sleep.

A yawn tore her jaws apart, forcing her eyes closed as she swayed her way through the silent stone corridor. The bathroom was down the hall and to the right; strangely enough, this was the exact location of the bathroom in her apartment. Even now, trudging silently down the hall, she still managed to find the strength to be amazed with the time that she had awoken. Ever since she had accepted blood (not that she was drinking it now…) she had gained the ability to wake at noon, if she so needed, though her body still shut down when the sun arose. She was fairly sure this was Alucard's doing; she'd seen him once having tea with Sir Integra, so she found it difficult to believe that he couldn't control the time he awoke. Almost absently she wondered if he even slept at all… If he didn't, she envied him beyond any feasible measure.

Shuffling her way into the bathroom just down the hall, Seras closed the door behind her neglecting the lock (what did a vampire have left to fear?) as she tossed her bag into the sink and set about taking a shower. When all else failed and the icy draft of the mansion became too much, a shower was the closest she could get to warming herself back up, a usually tedious and frustrating task, as her body refused to hold in any sort of heat. Her Master had once told her that in order to truly embrace her darker self she would need to embrace the cold as well. She'd told her Master he could "embrace" her ass, which he had promptly done before disappearing into the shadows, a suggestive chuckle rolling through her mind. With a roll of her eyes she turned the nozzle of the shower stall, taking the moment to appreciate the sheer size of the stall.

To say the shower was…roomy would perhaps be an understatement. With enough room in it for two people to shower at the same time without even brushing elbows, the 'shower' was the largest she had ever seen.. As though to emphasis the multiple person capacity, there were two showerheads, one on either side, and two benches set a little ways from the showerheads which, she had noticed the last time she had used this shower, could be removed and used away from the wall. A switch beside the shower wall controlled the light above the shower, and with a gentle flick of her wrist the light was dimmed, leaving the shower cozy, dark and warm. The perfect calming solution to the already tensed and strained vampire. She had asked, upon taking up residence in the Hellsing Manor, why it was that her Master required such a large bathroom for only himself and was rewarded with a mischievous grin and chuckle in response. Seras thought it best not to dwell on such things.

As she stood just outside the stall, hand in the steady stream of water as she waited for it to hit the hotter temperatures, she decided to try using the showerhead in tandem with the bench, curious as to whether or not it would be awkward. A simple thought to keep her whirling thoughts under control, to push memories to some far corner where nothing could reach them. She had been through this before. However…things were different now. She was different.

A sigh and a headshake later, Seras had disrobed and entered the scalding shower, jumping slightly as the burning water touched her frozen skin. Moments later she had sunk against the cool tile walls, nearly purring with pleasure as her icy skin was assaulted by the scalding water loosened the knots at her shoulders and began the arduous task of raising her temperature. Regardless of Alucard's reason, the young vampress had quickly come to adore the large bathroom and had been more than excited to find the immense claw-footed tub located just beyond the shower. However, a bath was currently out of the question. Her mobility would be inexcusably limited and, as tense as she was feeling, it would likely make the situation worse.

It was here, surrounded by the easy lighting and warmth, that she was finally able to reflect on her dreams. It had been six days now that Seras had been awoken late in the night, three days since she had given up on a decent night's rest. The vampire shuddered, wrapping her undead arms around herself as her eyes threatened to close on her. With a shake of her head, she plucked the showerhead from its' mount and sat carefully on the dark granite bench, her toiletries migrating to her left side on the spacious bench.

Absently her hands went about their normal routine as she lathered up her hair and slowly rinsed out the sweet smelling shampoo from her short tresses. She began to worry at her bottom lip, careful not to puncture the skin with her sharp canines. She had yet to tell Alucard of her dreams and, more than anything, she hoped they would leave her before they became a problem. Honestly she was surprised her Master had not confronted her already; such dreams could not possibly stay within her own head. The sleep deprivation that was now seriously threatening the young woman's ability to perform her duties had gone unnoticed in the silence that had overwhelmed London these past couple of weeks. For this, at least, she was thankful for. The last time she had tried her hand at the shooting range she'd missed nearly every target, her eyes unfocused and mind lost somewhere else.

She knew why the dreams were plaguing her once again. One week hence would be the anniversary (such morbidity) of her father and mother's gruesome demise, some 25 years ago. Despite the time that had passed the memory of it was still fresh and palpable in her mind, cutting away at her sleep and soul every time she dared close her eyes. She stood, then, replacing the showerhead, having decided that she was not quite comfortable with sitting down. A shudder traced through her frame, laced with embarrassment and fury with her own weakness. This incident was gone, dead, buried. In the past. There was no changing it, much like she could not change the creature she now was. Allowing her dreams to so easily disrupt her daily life was disgusting and pitiful, a disgrace to not only herself but her Master.

And yet…it remained. That feeling of helplessness. Of uselessness. Watching her parents killed, her mother defiled, unable to do more than take a bullet in the gut for her attempted bravado. A creature of nightmares and she could not even escape her own.

Pathetic.

Her shoulders began to shake, eyes shut, teeth grinding together with a force that would have shattered a human's jawbone. With her forehead now pressed against the still cool tiles, Seras Victoria's fist clenched into a skin piercing grip, her fingernails breaking the skin on her palm easily and without notice. Suddenly and without warning her fist struck out, slamming into the wall with a force that shattered the tile, leaving a sizeable dent in the sheet rock behind it. Shaking, she withdrew her hand, staring with a blank fury at the chunks of tile embedded in her skin. Sluggishly her blood rose to the surface, dripping freely from the wounds to mingle with the water as it swirled down the drain. Just enough blood left in her system left to bleed. A scream fought its' way to her throat and she shoved it down, teeth and hands clenched together as though sheer pain could stop her rising emotions. Even these she had lost control of.

'Nicely done, Police Girl. Though I'm sure Walter will not feel the same as I do about the wall.'

Something between a gasp and a shriek escape the Police Girl as she whirled, bloody fist up as though to strike at something behind her. It took her longer than it should have to realize that she was, in fact, alone. Or, as alone as one could be when one had a vampiric Master who could decide to pop into one's mind whenever said Master wished.

"Master, what have I told you about frightening me?" Seras's irritated voice burst forth, further impressing upon even herself how exhausted she was. Had sleep not so eluded her, she would have felt that tingling that always seemed to precede her Master's voice before he spoke in her head. With a resigned sigh, her Master's own light anger beginning to flow through her mind, she returned to her task, rinsing out her hair and scrubbing down a body that never seemed to warm. The pain of her mangled fist had receded, the previously embedded chunks of tile being forced from her skin to land with a plink on the tiled floor.

'You haven't been drinking again, Police Girl.' His anger was palpable, even through the distance that separated them, searing her mind and causing her to wince. 'You're weak now. Weak and vulnerable. What has your mind in such turmoil, Seras Victoria?' Seras rapidly blinked away a soap bubble, wholly unaware of the light blush attempting to creep along her neck. It was so very rare that her Master used her name… Why was it that now, his voice seemed velvety, soft in her head?

Sleep deprivation, to be sure.

"Master…just…just…" She trailed off, feeling wary of her almost callous state of mind. "I don't want to talk about it, okay?" The Police Girl hunched in on herself, hand lightly tracing the wall tile's swirled design. A chuckle, at once both warm and frightening trilled through her mind, trailing away after a couple of seconds, amused by her antics.

'My Master, Sir Integra if you've forgotten in your careless, blood-less haze, wishes to speak to you when you are finished.' Seras groaned, fighting the urge to add a second hole to the first she had made in the shower wall. Whatever Sir Integra wanted with her was not likely to be good. She had done her best to avoid her Master's Master the past week, aware that she would notice her sudden lag in speed and speech even faster than her Master might. Anything not an asset to the Hellsing Organization….

"Alright, Master…" Seras' voice trailed off, whiny even to her as it echoed in the steamy shower. Sighing, she ducked her head beneath the scalding spray, allowing the tiny rivulets of water to wash away what soap was left on her body. As her Master's voice drifted off.

'Oh, and Police Girl?' Seras jumped for the second time that evening, her own anger beginning to surface.

'You missed a spot.' Something akin to a breeze brushed along the Police Girl's bare shoulder, enticing a shudder that seemed to travel from her tingling scalp to her scarlet painted toenails (boredom will make a vampire do many a strange thing). A tiny clump of soap drifted before her eyes, floating lazily down to join the water as it raced down the drain. Again, that chuckle, so frustratingly close within her mind, and then he was gone.

A/N: I'm a whore for reviews, so lemme know what you think. Flames are pointless and help no one, however, I am always open for constructive criticisms, suggestions, and just plan ol' flattering responses. They are like sweet cream to my eyes. Keep in mind it's been a while, so try to be gentle. Thanks, mate!