Dear readers,

Long ago, midway through Season Four, I began to post a story called What's the Alma Mater?, the tale of Kim and Ron's journey to college. As those final episodes aired, it became clear my story would not fit into canon; reluctantly but without misgiving, I took down what I had written and there things remained for three years.

However, the show ended with too many unresolved narrative threads and unanswered questions that continued to ask for resolution and answers, and so I have revived the concept of a journey to college story for our heroes. While this version of What's the Alma Mater? is new, there are some elements from the original story that I was able to reuse. The bottom line: if something seems familiar, you're not experience déjà vu; you're just remembering a long-ago gag.

What's the Alma Mater? takes place in the summer after the series finale Graduation and my story Fly Me to the Moon.

As ever, I offer my thanks to campy for his proofreading assistance.

As ever too, leave a response and I'll send a reply.

KP © Disney

"Grrrrrr!"

Anne Possible turned from the counter in her newly reconstructed kitchen and looked to her growling daughter. "What's wrong, Kim?"

"College! I so don't know where to go," the frustrated auburn-haired teen replied as she threw up her hands, then swung away from the jumbled pile of letters that covered the kitchen table.

"I'm sure you'll make the right choice," Anne said reassuringly.

"But how do I know what it is? There's so much to consider: what I want to major in, extracurriculars, where it is and, and …"

Listening to her daughter speak at an increasingly staccato pace while becoming visibly perturbed, Anne finished Kim's sentence: "Ron."

Kim, biting her lip, nodded.

"And to think you said he wasn't boyfriend material," Anne said.

"Mom!" Kim protested, before she saw the wry grin spread across her mother's face. "Playing your own daughter," she added with mock indignation. "So not funny."

Anne held up her hands in an exaggerated placatory gesture. "Sorry, honey. It's just so nice to see how far the two of you have come."

"We have come a long way, haven't we?" a now-smiling Kim agreed, as she considered how much her relationship with Ron had evolved and deepened over the past year, from Junior Prom, through Graduation, and their recent mission in the Pacific. "I really don't want to leave him. We've been through so much together and I want to share this with him." She sighed. "Maybe I should just go to Upperton," she said with resignation.

Anne set down her whisk and joined her daughter at the kitchen table. "Kimmie, you know there's nothing that would make me happier than having you nearby and attending my alma mater."

"But," Kim said, anticipating the qualifier her mother was about to pronounce.

"But you need the school that's right for you and as much as I'd like that to be my college, I think you were onto something important when you applied to colleges overseas because you wanted to see the world."

Kim cocked an eyebrow. "That was before I saw it from outer space," she countered, recalling her time in captivity aboard a Lorwardian battle cruiser.

"Point taken," Anne said. "Still, you've spent your whole life in Middleton and going away for school, even if it's somewhere else in the U.S., could be good for you."

Before Kim could react, the door opened and Ron, wearing his Smarty Mart vest, sauntered in. "Hola, KP, Mrs. Dr. P."

"Good morning, Ron," Mrs. Dr. P said. "Would you like some breakfast before you go to work? I'm making omelets."

"Do I want some Mrs. Dr. P breakfast? That's like asking if the Ronman would like extra cheese on his chimeritos," he answered as he sat down next to Kim, who leaned over and bussed him on the cheek. "Man, I love eating here!"

Kim snorted, then mussed her boyfriend's hair. "Thanks for stopping by before going to Smarty Mart."

"No way I wasn't going to see my badical GF before we both work our different shifts today," he said, referring to the fact that he had pulled the eight-to-six slot at the big box store while Kim was going to be working from two to ten at Club Banana. Then he looked at the stack of envelopes. "That is one ginormous amount of mail."

"Understatement much? I think I have more acceptance letters now than before Warhok and Warmonga destroyed the house."

"Which I must say is looking mighty fine, all things considered," he observed as he surveyed the new kitchen.

"It's amazing what Jim and Tim were able to do with some photos and alien reproduction technology," James Possible said as he entered the kitchen and made his way to the coffee pot.

Ron reached into the pile of envelopes and pulled one out. "This one's from MIST," he said as he read the return address.

"My school?" James asked, still hoping, even if he knew it was in vain, that Kim would choose to follow in his college footsteps.

"That's strange," Kim said. "I'm pretty sure I saw one from your school already, Dad."

"Hey, does anyone know where Ulan Bator is?" Ron wondered aloud.

"Excuse me?" Kim replied, caught off guard, if not wholly surprised, by the seeming randomness of her boyfriend's question.

"Here," Ron said, handing Kim the envelope, which she tore open.

"Spankin'," she said without much enthusiasm. "I've been offered a full scholarship by the Mongolian Institute of Shepherding and Tenting."

"Way to go, KP!" Ron said, pumping his fist. "Yurts rock!"

"I didn't even apply to this school," she said, shaking her head.

"Man, you get into places you didn't even apply to and I get in nowhere," Ron sighed. "What are the odds?"

"You know, Ronald, when you put it that way, I'd have to say slim to none," James said. When everyone looked at him, he continued. "I really hadn't thought about this until right now, but the statistical likelihood of Ronald not being accepted anywhere would have to be extremely, indeed, impossibly unlikely."

Kim considered what her father said. "Dad's right," she said, angry over her BFBF's sitch but fully engaged and intrigued by the mystery. "Something's so not right here."

"Okay, you guys have lost me," Ron said.

"Ron, Brick Flagg got into college," Kim said, as if that explained all.

"So?"

"You had better grades than Brick Flagg."

"KP, Sacky Eye Vee Ex had better grades than the Brickster."

Kim smirked. "True, but still: you graduated in four years, he took seven."

"Yeah, but he had the jockage going for him. The recruiters were all about him."

"Then they should have been all about my BF, who, I will remind you, set more Middleton High football records than Brick Flagg ever did. And then there's the fact that you invented the Naco, appeared on American Starmaker, and save the world with me on a regular basis."

"Meaning?"

"You should have been accepted by somebody," Anne said as she set down two plates, one before him and the other before Rufus, who, at the appearance of food, appeared with a napkin tied around his neck.

"Thanks, Mrs. Dr. P!" he said while Rufus offered an enthusiastic paws up.

As her boyfriend and his little buddy began to eat, Kim activated her wrist Kimmunicator.

"Hi, Kim, what up?" Team Possible's tech guru asked when his image appeared on screen.

"Wade, what are the odds that no school would accept Ron?"

"Hmm. Interesting question. I'll have to create an algorithm that includes his GPA, extracurriculars, his sidekicking," he said as his fingers began to fly across the keyboard. "It'll take some time to work out … Got it."

"And?"

"They're long."

"Uh, how long?" Ron asked between bites.

"Let's just say the odds of Bonnie Rockwaller breaking up with Junior, taking a vow of poverty, and dating Kim's Cousin Larry are better."

"Wow," the teen hero said, impressed. "Those are long odds."

"See? I told you," James said triumphantly.

"I don't get it," Ron said as he rubbed his chin while Rufus polished off his breakfast. "Sure, Bon-Bon's into the fundage, but Larry's kind of cool and—"

Kim cocked an eyebrow. "Ron, trust me. Bonnie. Larry. So not going to happen. Not now. Not ever."

"Wait a minute," Ron said as the proverbial light bulb finally went off over his head. "You mean I should have gotten in somewhere?"

"Exactly," Kim said. "And I want to know why you didn't. Wade, any ideas?"

"Maybe one of your enemies decided it would be a good way to break up the team?"

"Not going to happen," Kim said firmly.

"Still, it's not a bad theory," Ron suggested. "You could go to a hoity-toity school in Hong Kong while I'm stuck here and—"

"We've had this convo, Ron," Kim said testily. "I'm not breaking up with you."

"But your enemies might not know that," Anne said suggested.

"Fair enough, Mom, but ever since the invasion, Global Justice has been making sure the bad guys behave themselves."

"Is this the same Global Justice that relies on you to do its work?" James asked.

Kim grimaced. "You have a point," she conceded. "Wade?"

"Drakken and Shego are too busy spending all the money they're making from their speaking tours and his mutagen, Dementor's been busy trying to fend off a hostile takeover of the strudel works by Hank's Gourmet Cupcakes 2.0, Frugal Lucre is tied up with his new show on the Cheapskate Shoppers Network and Camille Leon is scoring big ratings on Dancing With the Cons, Motor Ed and Adrena Lynn started dating and have been cruising cross country visiting extreme sports shows in a tricked-out ride, the Seniors have their hands full with Bonnie, Chester Yapsby is back working for Professor Acari, Electronique just won the politest prisoner-of-the-month award for the third month in a row, Duff's been focused on restoring the fairways at Castle Killigan, Gemini has been focused on training Pepe for the Exminster Dog Show and DNAmy is still trying to undo the curse of the Yono so you can eliminate both her and Monkey Fist."

Kim pursed her lips in thought; she knew they were forgetting someone. Then her face brightened. "Wade, what about the Mathter?"

"Uh, wouldn't he be Dad's enemy?" Ron observed. "I mean, sure, he had some issues with me and you but Dad was the one who finally took him down."

"True, but you're still the reason his plan didn't—"

"Add up?" James interjected, feeling pleased with himself.

Kim, Anne, and Wade groaned while Ron muttered something about being beaten to the punch line.

"The Mathter has both motive and ability," Wade agreed. "Since he already wiped Ron off the grid once, I bet he could easily have found a way to take care of Ron's college applications. You want me to investigate?"

"Please and thank you," Kim said.

"Okay, I'll let you know as soon as I learn anything."

"Thanks, Wade. You rock," Kim said as the call came to an end.

"So, now what?" Ron asked as an envelope caught his eye. "Ooo! Look! Oops, uh never mind."

"Ron …" Kim growled as he stuffed the offending item back into the pile. "Spill."

"Nuh uh. I'm not spilling anything!" He then proceeded to knock over James' coffee. Kim vaulted over the table, grabbed a towel, and wiped the mess dry before any of her acceptance letters were damaged.

"What was in the envelope?" she demanded.

"Uh, well, you see …" he said as he nervously tugged at his collar. When she flashed him the puppy dog pout, his shoulders slumped. "You don't play fair, KP," he grumbled as he found the envelope he'd tried to hide.

Kim's eyebrow shot up as she saw the return address. "And you hid this why?"

"Hello! You and cooking school? Remember the blender?"

"I tamed that machine!" she said indignantly, before she wrapped her arms around his neck. "With the help of a very able tutor, I might add."

"Thanks. Since even these guys haven't admitted me, maybe I should ask them to make me a teacher."

"You know, Ron, that's not a bad idea," Anne said.

"No way! Me teach at a school? I'd probably wind up working with Steve Barkin."

"But you'd be great," Kim countered. "You love food, know how to cook, and invented the Naco."

"Thanks for the believin', KP, but it looks like Ron Stoppable's going to be jockeying for Employee-of-the-Month at Smarty Mart this fall."

"Well, if that's true, he'll have Kim Possible cheering him on all the way."

"I think I'll keep you around," he offered with a wan, but grateful, grin.

"You'd better," Kim said with mock severity just at the Kimmunicator beeped. "Wow, Wade, that was fast, even for you," she said as her young friend's visage appeared on screen.

"So, was it the Mathter?" Ron asked hopefully.

"Sorry, guys, but that's not why I'm calling – there's been a hit on the site."

TBC …