Pulling up to the Snyder's was totally surreal. It had only been four months since he had left but Noah couldn't seem to shake the anxiety that he was feeling. Thinking about the day he left and what he said to Luke brought all of Noah's old feelings up. He loved him and he wanted him back, he knew he would always want that. All that was left was for Luke to realize that he still loved him. Noah smiled to himself Christmas at the Snyder's was a great way to help get him and Luke back on track. Grabbing his bag Noah opened his truck door and stepped out, looking around he loved that during the time he was gone nothing had physically changed all that much. Walking up to the enclosed porch Noah could hear the load noise of the Snyder's who were already there. Taking a deep breath he reached for the door handle and opened the door. Of course Natalie was the first to spot Noah, bending down to her level he opened his arms as a welcome for her to run and hug him. Once his arms were around the small girl he realized that he hadn't breathed since he opened the door. It wasn't until Natalie let out a small cry of delight did anyone notice that Noah had arrived. Once the others in the room saw him they all gathered around him asking how he was and how the film he had been working on out in California was coming along. Noah took a moment to look at the faces in the room. He noticed Jack and Carly how was barely showing only being four months pregnant. Holden and Lily looked happy as they fussed over Noah's things in between giving him a hug and telling him how glad they were to have him home. At that moment Noah realized that the one person he was dying to see wasn't there. As if he could read he mind Holden took Noah's arm and lead him down the hall into the living room and had Noah sit down on the sofa.

"He isn't home yet. Noah, and to be honest I'm still not sure that this was the best idea not telling him about you coming home." Holden could see that that wasn't what Noah had wanted to hear, but Holden had to think of his son and his feelings. "It's not that I don't want you here, you know that right"? Holden waited until Noah nodded his head before he continued. "It has taken him a few months to stop breaking down and crying over Reid, I'm just so worried that you're going to be hurt if Luke can't give you what you want Noah".

"I would never pressure him, I love him." Noah knew that his voice was barely audible but he knew that Holden had heard him. Ever since Noah had left the Snyder family still reached out to Noah let him know that he still had a family and that he would never be alone, but what Noah really wanted deep down in his core was Luke and it scared him that Holden could look at him just a moment and read that in him.

"I know you do son, that's why I'm concerned Noah. He loves you too; he is just drowning in his own guilt and pity. I wish I knew what was right. Maybe you are exactly what he needs Noah… I just don't know." Holden was looking and Noah hoping he would have some answer that would ease Holden's mind, but Noah knew that it wasn't that easy he knew that the next couple of days were going to be hard … Holden and Noah were sitting in silence when they heard a coarse of voices welcoming the last Snyder home. They looked one another in the eyes when they heard Luke's voice,

"Where is he, where is Noah"?