Title: It`s all Peachy

Author: IantoJHarkness

Rating: PG

Characters: Jack, Ianto, team, SG:1

Spoilers – None

Summary: The Torchwood team finds a Stargate.

Disclaimer: Don`t own anything! And don`t eat me if I got something wrong! It`s a great while since I watched Stargate. O:

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"What the bloody hell is that?"

Was the first greeting Ianto got when he entered through the cogwheel door. He scrunched up his nose looking offended. " Owen.."

" Oi Ianto, you know almost everything around here...can you tell us what the hell that thing is?" Owen was pointing towards a huge metall looking ring in the middle of the hub

and it took up most of their space. Oh so that was what Owen had commented on. Mind slap for that, Ianto muttered.

"What?"

" I have no idea." Ianto moved closer to the ring,"And I do know EVERYTHING." He added as his eyes roamed the border of the ring, in which some alien symbols was engraved.

They were beautiful.

"Yeah you do, especially when we`re alone." Ianto directed a glare at his boss standing behind him. A hand that definitely wasn`t Ianto`s was quickly removed from his ass. "What is this?"

Gwen jumped down from her workstation, hands on her hips." Come on Jack, we`ve been dying to know. Especially Tosh. Even she can`t figure it out!"

"And that`s something!" Owen butted in.

Jack laughed, holding up his arm to reveal his vortex manipulator. "That my friends, is a portal. " He punched in some random combination into his wrist strap and smiled broadly.

"A portal? Of course! how could I not seen it?" Tosh yelled, apparently excited to no end. Ianto on the other hand was just staring at Jack.

" A portal to where?"

He found himself asking as the portal border began to activate,spin, the foreign symbols locking in place for every, Ianto believed, number Jack had put in on his wrist strap.

Jack held out his arms towards the ceiling, still smiling. " Everywhere!"

"Everywhere? "

"Like to green alien planets?"

The final symbol was locked in place , the ring was suddenly filled with a surface of liquid that looked like water to Ianto. Reaching out to touch it,

his mouth opened to a silent ´O´ as he watched his hand disappear into the portal. " Careful, I don`t know where it goes."

A hand was now gripping his arm, tugging it back.

Jack looked as amazed as Ianto felt, Jack may be immortal but he looked like a child who just got a new toy. " And I want to have both welsh hands in one piece."

Quickly withdrawing his hand, cheeks on fire, Ianto mumbled an excuse as he turned to hide away at his own workstation, the coffee machine. But he was cut short as Jack yelled and pulled him away from the portal into his embrace.

"Ouch! Jack! What the..."

He blinked.

And he blinked again.

There were people coming through the portal. Gwen, Owen and Tosh had already gotten to their feet ,gun in each hand.

And they where going to need it at the looks of the intruders. They were all packing a huge automatic ready to fire. They were not green though, that`s always a plus.

Jack pushed him back, a hand already drawing his webley from it`s holster.

"I`m Captain Jack Harkness, We`re Torchwood! Who are you!"

"Woah! Stand down Captain. We come in peace." An elder man in military clothing beamed as he lowered his gun.

Ianto could see that Owen was already looking up and down the only woman in the party. He sighed , shaking his head in distaste.

Jack wasn`t lowering his weapon, he had been through to much as to trust strangers and wasn`t going to let down his guard that easily. Too many had been killed that way.

" That`s an american accent. You`re from Earth?" Jack was bewildered, but still did not trust to lower his pistol.

" Yes actually we are, uhm, how do you know? " A nerdy looking guy, quite cute in glasses, asked as he followed the example of the elder and lowered his weapon.

Jack sighed, his webley finally returning to it`s place.

"Because this is Earth, Cardiff, Wales. 2008. "

All four turned to eachother, surprise written all over their faces.

"Could it be a different dimension?" The woman whispered to the others, not passing Ianto`s keen ears.

"Oh, great. Another one?" The elder huffed, frowning.

"Excuse me, but exactly who are you?" Jack wasn`t liking not being in control of the situation, and he showed it. He strode, right up into the face of the eldest and looked him in the eye.

"I need to know where you got your alien technology."

"I`m General Jack O`Neill. "

Four Torchwood operatives inhaled sharply. This was just brilliant! Just the look on their Jack`s face was priceless!

The general continued on with the presentation of the rest of his team. "That`s Téal`c " A large scary looking man nodded at his name. "Captain Samantha Carter" The woman of course.

"And that`s Dr Daniel Jackson. " The nerdy guy.

The Torchwood team quickly responded with their own names, finding the General quite likable. Well mostly because he had a higher rank than Jack and that was hilarious.

"That still doesn`t answer my second question."

"Well if I could explain..."

" You would never stop. " The general stopped Dr Jackson, a hand on his own forehead feigning a head ache. " We found a Stargate, dug it up and here we are. Your story then?"

He nodded toward their own portal. Or ´ Stargate´.

" Mostly the same but it involved sex. Which makes it more interesting than your story."

Two eyebrows shot in the air , belonging to Ianto and Teal`c. The first frowning, the second blank. When all this was over, a little questioning was called for about the ´sex´part of Jack`s story.

Maybe some spanking involved, Ianto mused.

"Then you`re Torchwood 4? " Tosh asked.

"No we`re SG:1, one of many SG teams." The woman, Captain Carter answered her.

Jack`s face twisted into fury. " Why am I not informed about this? Ianto!" His eyes leaving the General to lock with Ianto`s.

"Yes sir?"

" Get me a meeting with they-who-shall-not-be-named, and call Unit. See if they know anything about these SG teams. "

"Yes sir. "

50 minutes and two phone calls later, in which both had never heard the name´ Stargate`, Ianto returned from Jack`s office to find the others at their workstations,

but with one of the others at each desk. "So it`s an alien device that creates a wormhole enabling personal transportation to complementary devices located cosmic distances away? Fascinating!"

Tosh was laughing, looking quite happy about showing her work to Dr Jackson who seemed equally excited about it. Gwen was talking away with Captain Carter:

"Goa`uld? Never heard of them! that`s just awful. And you..."

And Owen... was ignoring the large man beside him. Pretty funny sight if you looked from Ianto`s perspective. Owen might be afraid of being eating by the man by the looks of it.

But the tip of the iceberg was Jack having a staring contest with the General. Both men was still standing infront of the Stargate and Ianto wondered if they had moved at all since he been gone making the calls.

"Jack!"

"Yes?" Both men looked at him.

"Our Jack?"

"Yes?"

" They have never heard of it. Their team doesn`t exist to us or them. "

"It`s secret. Of course people wouldn`t know." The General huffed. " And I still don`t understand why we don`t know about you. "

Jack grinned, not the nice guy smile but the bad cop one. " Like you said. It`s secret."

"Oh come off it. You act like little kids." Gwen chirped from her desk.

" You know boys and their toys." Ianto added with a wink. "Always have to measure up."

" You never complained about my size before. "

Ianto turned away, and he walked as quickly as he could, red and embarrassed that everyone had heard Jack`s remark. "I`m going to make some coffee, you want? "

"Oh darling we already have Insta..." Gwen stopped herself but it was too late. Ianto had already turned to her with a mother`s reprimanding look on his face.

" We. Don`t. Drink. Instant. here. " A scowl and he was off to his coffee machine.

Ianto found himself thanking God when the Rift alarm went off, making both teams jump from their places.

Jack reached for his coat but Ianto was ahead, still red cheeked, and helped him without a word. A mutual glance between them said much more than words could and Jack smiled an

assuring smile before he turned to both teams. "Okay, something came through, Tosh get the location, Owen and Gwen with me and Ianto. And.." He turned to the rest. " You get the hell out of my sight.

If I hear a word about you, anything going wrong, I`ll shut down the SG myself. Got that, General?"

" You`re in no place to make commands, Captain."

"Oh yes I am. It is you who are in no command here, General." With that Jack strode for the door, Ianto falling in line behind him.

"Peaches!"

Jack froze and turned, eyebrow raised. "What?"

General Jack O` Neill smiled and repeated:

" Peaches. When you`re out buy some? You get hungry in this job. "

Stifling a laugh, Ianto pulled a shocked Jack by the collar through the door.