For those who don't know: HAPPY ECLARE DAY. It was started on Twitter that TODAY, October 14, 2010, is THE official Eclare day. So, in honor, I'm doing my humble Eclare-ing duties and writing lotso fluff. Expect one-shots later. ;D
As for the song- It's likely you've never heard GBS, they're my parent's favorite band. I HIGHLY suggest hearing this song, it fits so well with the entire concept of this piece.
(It's also worth nothing that Rhythm Of Love by the Plain White T's helped to write this as well.)
Sorry if the ending was abrupt. I just wanted this to be written.
Song: As Fast As I Can – Great Big Sea
He wouldn't admit it, but he loved how she looked right then, sprawled across Morty's seats, half in his lap. He loved seeing her chest rise, the way goose bumps rose when his lips pressed against hers, and he loved the way her cinnamon hair was complimented perfectly by the color of his beloved hearse's upholstery.
He loved the slight mews she made when they kissed, and the way she looked afterwards, with her hair disheveled and her breathing hitched in an entirely suggestive manner.
Just seeing her there reminded Eli that he was a lucky bastard- that after all they'd been through, she still fit into his life in the smallest of ways. Who else could look so perfect in sweat pants and a tank top, in his car?
Clare had just gotten back from her grandma's less than a week ago, and, at first, she'd been nervous and scared to face her somewhat-boyfriend again, fearing that he still harbored harsh feelings due to her words at Vegas Night. Her mind slipped to their phone conversation the day she returned home. The second he picked up, his voice had been mellow, even calling her beautiful.
In that moment, she'd fallen a little more.
Every night since then, they'd delved into a pattern. She'd call, or sometimes he would call, and they'd just talk and talk, until the hour grew late. Then, he'd pick her up in his hearse, idling at the curb, and she'd lay with him until dawn crept over the Toronto skyline.
For the first few nights, he'd been talkative. She didn't mind; she loved the way he talked. His voice always grew with intensity, especially when he was talking about something he was passionate about, and his hands would move frequently in discussion, as if spelling out his points in the air.
Most entertaining was how his eyes lit up in a way she only saw one other time; when he looked at her.
However, as their late-night adventures became a pattern, he'd been quieter. Not that she minded that either, because being with him was just comfortable, no matter what their activity, she felt... safe. Their brand of silence wasn't bad, it just spoke the things they couldn't verbally.
"Are you okay?"
He felt like asking, she'd been quiet. To be fair, he was quiet too, but more in fear of what was to be said.
"More then that." She murmured, moving her face closer to his.
Eli caught her lower lip between his with the practiced attention of a familiar lover. Her lips were soft and pliable in a way that, though they'd been together for such a brief time, he recognized and instinctively knew.
His tongue slipped into her mouth and she let out a short gasp and, encouraged, his hands slipped to the soft skin of her lower back, drawing out a longer sound from her chest. The moan vibrated through their bodies, and it sparked something deep and raw inside of Eli.
It wasn't lust- let that be known. He wanted her, but he had no animalistic urge to rip the purity ring from her finger. Her innocence was part of why she was so sexy; it was the unaware naivety that set her apart from any other girl he'd ever met. He was still a guy in the end, but right now, what he was feeling, was something just plain different.
It ran deeper than that, sending shockwaves down to the tips of his toes. He pulled away from her briefly, and a quick sweep over her blue eyes gave him the assurance that whatever this was, she felt it too.
Suddenly a flush fell over his face, and he blurted the first words that came into his head.
"I can't say it yet."
Without elaboration, she nodded, understanding what it meant.
"I understand."
She turned to the window, running a hand through her curls, attempting to erase the effects of their night. The physical ones, at least; the emotional ones ran deeper, and she wasn't sure that any amount of neatening up could erase those. She felt a lump threatening to burst in her throat, and internally, she cursed herself for being so presumptuous.
Knowing she'd misunderstood; Eli shook his head vehemently and placed a hand on her cheek, pulling her in for a gentle, toe-curling kiss.
"It's not that. I'm just not ready. I mean." He clenched his eyes. "I feel it. But I don't want to rush. Or ruin it."
Clare's cheeks flushed, half with happiness, half with embarrassment.
"Oh." She said, still slightly confused.
"It's just..." His voice tensed. "Julia."
Julia. The voice was like acid in Clare's mouth. "I know." She squeezed the hand resting on her cheek. "Just know that I feel it, and I'll always feel it, but I'll wait eons for you to decide when to say it. Because you're worth it, and I'm not rushing it, and I don't expect anything more."
His eyes, which had been clenched shut, opened at her with amazement. In her ocean-blue eyes, he didn't find resentment, anger, or sadness, but truth.
Clare wasn't lying.
The head-to-toe feeling grew deeper, and with a deep breath, he nodded.
"I feel it too. And when I'm ready, you'll be the first to know." He cocked his infamous side-smirk, his green eyes flashing with adoration.
"I better be." Her arm tightened around him, pulling herself closer to his body.
They lay like that, the silence blanketing them and forming a case around them. Eli traced patterns on the bare skin of Clare's sides, spelling out the story of a boy and a girl, and the things they could and couldn't say.
Couldn't , Eli thought. Not wouldn't. Definitely not won't. I will Clare. Just wait.
-x-
"I'm going as fast as I can, please don't make me rush,
this feeling's coming on way too fast.
I'll tell you all of the things that you'll never forget...
But I'm not ready say, "I love you" yet.
No, I'm not ready to say "I love you" yet."