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Dirty Talk
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Summary: "The great Uzumaki Naruto might be good at a lot of things, but I don't think even you can get someone off without touching them."

Disclaimer: Fiction.

Rating: M

Warning: OOC. Don't like it, don't read it.

A/N. Pardon my English, it's not my native language. I'd appreciate the help from a beta-reader though. If any of you are interested, just drop me a PM. Thanks so much.


It had been a long journey back to Konoha from the Amegakure. After a busy day of fighting rogue ninjas, while trying to protect the highly important scrolls they were carrying, the five Konoha ninjas and one hound decided to stay in an inn along the road for the night since Konoha was still a day away.

"What do you mean I couldn't do it?" Naruto gushed out in his and Kiba's usual banter.

"I don't think you could pull it off." Kiba shrugged, casually leaning backwards onto Akamaru.

The blond haired shinobi lifted one golden brow, chopsticks with ramen noodles around them paused in midair, halfway to his mouth. "You don't believe me?"

Sai was shaking his head from where he was lounging on a bed next to the two best friends on the floor, watching the unfolding scene lazily. "That's a bad move, Kiba-kun. You know how Naruto-kun gets when you tell him he can't do something."

Kakashi chuckled lightly over his orange novel, he was sitting on his own bed with back against the headboard. Completely agree with Sai.

Kiba only glanced at Sai's direction, before returning to Naruto and answering the blond's question. "Of course I don't believe you," he said, scoffing lightly. "The great Naruto Uzumaki might be good at creating barrages of shadow clones or futon Rasengans, hell I'm sure you could be good at a lot of things, but I don't think even you could talk someone off, and by talk I mean no touching them. I don't know if that's even possible though."

Naruto was frowning before it turned into a full glower.

"Of course that's possible, Kiba. There's this thing called 'wet dream'," Kakashi said, sitting up a little.

"Well, that. But most of the time you're like rubbing yourself against the bed or something, no?" Kiba said, pondering.

"Not all the time, you know. What about girls? They can have wet dreams too. " Sai countered. "And they have nothing to rub against the bed," he added with a shrug.

Kiba's eyes nearly popped out of his heads. "Seriously? Girls can have wet dreams?" questioned the dog lover, wide eyes.

Kakashi snickered under his mask. "Of course, they can," he said with conviction, but then he had to look sheepish all of a sudden, it made Naruto squint at him suspiciously.

"How can you be so sure, Kakashi-sensei?" the blond inquired.

"Well, it was said in this book, actually," Kakashi said, grinning, holding out his orange book in one hand, and the other rubbing at the back of his head stupidly.

"Gee," Naruto rolled his eyes at his ex-teacher's antic, he then waved his hand dismissively before continuing, "This is totally out of our subject. Anyway, I am confident that I can completely talk someone off. End of discussion." Naruto decided, blowing on his ramen before stuffing them into his mouth.

"Prove it."

Naruto flinched at the sudden inquiry coming from the bathroom direction. He stopped munching on his ramen and slowly looked up at Sasuke, who was leaning against the wall next to the bathroom door, shirtless, and only wearing a pair of loose pants. A smug smirk spread across his handsome features, satisfied that he could take Naruto by surprise.

"What?"

Sasuke was actually amused at how his friend was trying to hide the shock from everyone – and failed, apparently. Well, Naruto was only being Naruto. Always jumping nose first into something before thinking about it first. Sasuke was sure Naruto didn't really know what he was talking about.

Smirking even wide, Sasuke pushed himself off the wall and sauntered to the blond, saying, "C'mon, Dobe. Are you expecting us to believe that you could actually pull that off? That's totally hard to imagine, with a brain like yours."

"What? You, Teme!" Naruto snapped, he stood up, half slamming his cup of ramen onto the nightstand, glaring dagger at said teme.

Sasuke sat down on one of the beds, nonchalantly toweling his still wet hair. Taking in the sight of the fuming blond from the corner his eyes, he started again, "Well, let's hear it then, dobe, how exactly are you going to talk someone off? Are you gonna do some dirty talking, or maybe pull a striptease dance? Come to think of it, Dobe, I don't know if you really have the balls for it." He smirked as he caught his friend's cheeks puffing out.

However, Sasuke was taken aback when that expression gone just as fast as it had appeared. "Oh, what do you know about my balls, teme?" Naruto said with a cheeky grin. "You know, if I don't know you better, I'd say that you actually wanted me to talk you off."

"What!" Sasuke glared.

Kiba and Sai couldn't help it as they were doubled over their laughter. Kakashi merely closed his book and smirked in amusement, this is going to get interesting, he thought.

They watched as Naruto strolled over to the scowling Uchiha. Sasuke scooted backward in his bed, while Naruto advancing forward. "Let's make a bet then, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke glowered, he hated it when Naruto call him like that. Not that it reminded him of his fangirls or Sakura. It was just when Naruto call him like that… it stirred something inside his gut.

Straightened up, Sasuke just watched with narrowed eyes as Naruto placed one knee next to his thigh on the bed. "Let's see…" Naruto paused, tapping his chin with a finger contemplatively, until a grin took over his features. "If can talk you off, teme, you have to blow Kiba. In Baa-chan's room. While everyone watches."

"W-what?" Kiba stammered, but nobody turned their attentions at him, sadly.

The dobe was playing dirty now. But it was far too late to back out, especially since he'd been the one to issue the challenge. "Fine." He spoke through gritted teeth, before a smirk replacing the sour look on his face. "But if you can't, you're going to be my bitch for a whole day."

Oh yes! It had been officially confirmed now that Sasuke actually had the hot for Naruto, Kakashi whooped in his head, while Sai snickering next to him. The ex-root eyes were sliding from Sasuke to Naruto. Just the thought of Naruto spread out under Sasuke, pinned and writhing under the Uchiha… it was undeniably a turn on. His cock twitched in his pants.

Naruto, however, did not waver. He simply smirked a little wider, leaning in to place both arms on Sasuke's shoulders. "I suggest you take off your pants and boxers, teme. Because I promise you it'll be good." He said lowly to Sasuke's ear. A second later and he was gone, but not after pressing a kiss to Sasuke's lips.

Sasuke sat, dumbfounded. He merely watched as the other ninja walked towards the bathroom door. His lips tingled slightly, and he lifted a hand to absently touch them.

Sasuke let his companions squabbling, probably over how much money they would bet and to whom, as he stood from his bed and stripped to his grey boxers. He merely raised an elegant eyebrow as he felt his companions' eyes shift on him.

"What?" he asked, nonchalantly. "Two can play this game." He shrugged.

Kakashi smirked at him, while Sai stared at his crotch rather shamelessly. "I thought I'm going to see you naked, Sasuke-kun. Anyway, that's quite impressive dick you have there."

"Hn," was Sasuke's only respond, before he sat on the bed, back leaning against the headboard.

Kiba grinned amusedly as he waved a hand and said, "Now, the game is about talk someone off without touching him, right? Don't you think we need to tie Sasuke's hand?"

"Yes, and preferably with chakra rope," Kakashi agreed, smirking devilishly, reaching inside his ninja pouch for a chakra rope. Meanwhile, Sasuke had his eternal mangekyou sharingan set upon his ex-teacher, but that didn't seem to faze Kakashi whatsoever. No, Sasuke wouldn't use his deadliest weapon on him.

When Sasuke heard the bathroom door opened and shut again, his hands were already tied behind his back. Seconds later, Naruto came back into the room, completely naked.

Sasuke felt his jaw drop in an entirely un-Uchiha-like way. Sasuke had seen Naruto's naked form before. You couldn't go to a mission and sometimes had to stay in such close quarter with other guys without seeing that much. But there was no way to deny that the dobe was gorgeous. Lean muscle shifting under the tanned skin; broad shoulders, slim waist, strong legs… No one could deny wanting him. And not even Sasuke.

He'd always been secretly fascinated with the other man's body. Not that Sasuke would ever admit it, barely even to himself because it sounded so gay, but he really couldn't help it. And to make things worse, the dobe was watching him with those gorgeous blue eyes, lashes lowered and lip sticking out in a seductive pout. Sasuke started to have a feeling that this wasn't going to be easy for him.

Naruto knew everyone else's eyes were watching him, drinking him in. He licked his lips. Let them look – let Sai make a sketch of his naked body. They even could touch later if they wanted. But right now, he was so intent on making the bastard scream his name.

Stopping at the bottom of Sasuke's bed, Naruto dropped his knees slowly, gracefully onto the bed. He crawled the last distance to stop and stood on his knees. Giving Sasuke a perfect view of his body.

"Hi, there, Teme."

Sasuke shuddered. He'd never quite heard the pitch the dobe was using before. It was low and sultry. And it sounded like there was a growl just begging to escape. He could see Kiba shiver on the floor against the bed to his right and started to relax, glad he wasn't the only one affected. There was no way Sasuke could fight that voice.

"H-hn, Dobe…" His own voice was hoarse all of a sudden, though he was obviously making every effort to stay impassive and unaffected. Oh how Naruto would love to make the teme crumble.

Pouting, Naruto shifted his gaze upon Sasuke's crotch. "I thought I've told you to strip, Teme." He sat at his legs in front of Sasuke, watching from under his long blond eyelashes as a smirk crossed Sasuke's feature.

"What? Why? I'm sure you can't make me hard anyway."

Naruto pouted again. Playfully this time. "Probably. But that could be a turn on for me, no?" He said, batting his eyelashes seductively. Sasuke groaned lowly in his throat, and Naruto giggled. "That's right, Sasu. I would want to have my hand on your impressive cock… and tease you, just like this…" Naruto's voice was throaty and rough all of a sudden. Sasuke's eyes were following him, widening minutely as Naruto fell on his butt, legs splayed out. One had cupped the base of his cock, while the other's fingers stroking slowly up and down his length.

Naruto's cheeks flushed. He had been worried of the others' attention before, but right now his world was narrowing to one sharp point, Sasuke was more than filling that space.

"Fuck!" Sasuke cursed as his own erection sprung up inside his boxers.

Naruto lifted his gaze to Sasuke's groin, a lazy grin spreading across his features. Slowly, he looked up, meeting Sasuke's heated eyes. "Mm, do you want me to touch you, Sasu?"

Sasuke growled, hips shifting faintly. He could feel all the blood rushing south.

"But I can't, remember?" Naruto barely held back the chuckle when Sasuke growled again. "I know, it's not so fun when you couldn't touch, now was it? I would if I could, Teme. I'd have my hands all over that pale skin of yours. I know you'd taste just as good as you look. And fuck, would I taste you... I'd have my tongue on your cock in a heartbeat, Teme."

"N-Naruto…" Sasuke couldn't have held back the moan that escaped if he'd wanted to. He really wanted to feel that, needed to feel that. He was so fucking hard now.

"Mmm, yeah, Sasuke..." Naruto sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, as he slowly wrapped his fingers around the head of his already straining erection. "I'd wrap my lips around your cock, Teme. I could take you deep… all the way down my throat. Making you even harder…"

Sasuke shuddered, hips jerking up once again. He needed to be free of his confinement that was his fucking boxers. And more importantly he needed friction. He was starting to ache and all he wanted was for Naruto to wrap a hand around his cock and jerk him until he exploded. Yes. Right now that sounded so heavenly. Hell he'd do it himself, if he could get his a hand free. Collecting chakra around his wrists he tugged at the rope experimentally, only to feel his chakra sipping off of him minutely. Nope, not getting loose.

Sasuke groaned in frustration, letting his head fall back, idly registering the sound of heavy breathing to his left where Kakashi was supposed to be.

"Fuck, Naruto, please…"

"Yes, Sasuke, I'd have you begging just like that, asking me to let you come. But I wouldn't. Not yet. Just a little longer. So you can get even bigger. I want you big inside me, Teme."

"Oh fuck," Sasuke gasped, throwing his head against the headboard, hips bucking, precum dampening his boxers.

Sasuke looked so fucking sexy writhing in front of Naruto, chest heaving and gleaming, watching him with his impossibly dark eyes, almost black with lust and want. He couldn't help wondering how much better Sasuke would look if Naruto was riding him.

"Fuck, Naruto! Fuck, if you don't stop I swear I'll…"

Sasuke's swear ceased as he watched Naruto sucked two fingers into his mouth then reached down, pushing them straight into his ass with a small gasp. Sasuke sat in stunned silence, he was witnessing the most erotic thing he had ever seen, until he was proven wrong a few moments later when Naruto's back arched with a drawn out moan as his fingers reached the spot they'd been searching for.

Rolling his hips a little faster, Naruto began to lose himself to the sensations, free hand rubbing over his chest and moving down in small circles until his fingertips reached the neat hair at the base of his erection, only half of it was for a show and his voice was definitely a growl now.

"What, Sasuke? You swear you'll do what?"

Sasuke could see Kakashi's jaw tighten out of the corner of his eye. He could also hear little noises coming from the bed to his right. Soft gasps, little groans that sounded like Kiba and quiet moans that were definitely Sai. He didn't look though, couldn't take his eyes off of Naruto.

"I'll fuck you, Naruto, right here, hard and rough… and there'll be nothing stopping it!" Sasuke shifted, wanted to get closer to Naruto, only to meet resistance, some part of him remembering the rope that tied him to the headboard. The rest of it was more worried about pounding into Naruto over and over and over again.

Sasuke could almost feel it, him deep inside of Naruto, filling that empty space, stretching the blond until he ached, until he cried and screamed and pleaded for more of it. Yes, he wanted it. He was so close; he just needed that little push. He couldn't keep his breathing even any more, wasn't even trying.

He could hear Kakashi's pants echoing his, the little noises of want that he tried to hide mingled with the higher, needier sounds Sai and Kiba were making, all of it forming a sinful harmony to Sasuke's words.

"Ah! Yesss, Sasukee… Yess, please…" The words left Naruto's mouth in a low moan, a whine, a plea, a prayer, as if Sasuke was actually fucking him. Filling him. Naruto stroked his cock harder, hips rocking helplessly against the thrust of his fingers.

The sight of Naruto's face, twisted with want and pleasure that came with being so close but-not-quite-there had Sasuke teetering. It was that voice though, always that voice, colored with desperation, speaking to him, demanding and begging all at once that shoved him over the edge.

Sasuke cursed harshly, arching away from the headboard, shuddering helplessly as his orgasm exploded from him and he could do nothing but let it wash through him, whimpering with each spurt of hot liquid against his boxers. Vaguely he could hear Naruto's whimpers echoing his, somehow able to feel the dobe's hot breath against his shoulder, could barely make out of him trembling against his chest as Naruto exploded onto his stomach. But none of it mattered. He couldn't understand any of it until the spasms finally slowed and he started to come back to himself.

Sasuke relaxed slowly, letting his head hang for just a moment. He looked down just as those bright blue eyes opened to him. They were still a shade darker than normal, clouded with fading desire. The smile he received in response was breathtaking; satisfaction, love and amusement.

"I don't know how you did it, dobe. But you did," Sasuke admitted, shaking his head lightly. Naruto stole a kiss from his lips before slipping both arms around him to untie him. He rested against Sasuke for a moment, before pulling away.

"Yeah I know," he said, grinning devilishly, raising both hands. Sasuke watched the blond with a raised eyebrow. Rather than settling them on the back of his head like he used to do, Naruto performed a bunshin seal.

The clone appeared right next to Kakashi, whispering, "Do you need help, Taichou?" The clone then grounded the heel of its hand down against the hard ridge in Kakashi's pants, making the silver haired jounin bucked up into the touch frantically, throwing his head back. It met the headboard with a loud smack, but he didn't seem to notice. His hips jerked as he came hard, hissing and cursing. Sasuke just chuckled, glancing at Kakashi then back to see the devilish smirk still present on Naruto's lips.

Stealing a kiss from those pouty lips, Sasuke pulled Naruto closer to him, as he leaned back against the headboard, letting the other's head rest against his chest. Only after he was comfortable did he dare to look to his right.

Sai was leaning against Kiba, his head resting on the Inuzuka's shoulder and Kiba's on top of his head. Both guys' still had one hand hidden inside their pants, while the other hands were lying limply on the floor, next to their bodies. They were still panting lightly. Sasuke chuckled at them.

Sasuke's eyes shifted back to Naruto in his arms. If there was a true contentment, then it would be having the blond dobe in his arms. But the look of contentment was quickly disappeared as Naruto looked up at him with yet another devilish grin.

"You owe me, Teme. I win."

Sasuke just rolled his eyes, pulling Naruto close to him once again. "Fuck you later, Dobe." He smiled.

"No, no, Teme, you'll be sucking Kiba off." Naruto laughed softly against Sasuke's chest.

Kiba's face had turned pale, as Sai laughed at him. Kakashi merely smirked as he watched Sasuke murmuring something into Naruto's ear. His uncovered eye widened as the blond shinobi grinned suggestively at whatever Sasuke said, standing up from the bed, and pulling the teme with him towards the bathroom.

"Oi, save it until we're back to Konoha!"

-The End :D-