Disclaimer: You know what I'm gonna say….

A/N:

Ahem.

A few things: 1. My season 6 story "The Blorthog Project" will be posted soon. Look out for that.

2. Check out my other story "Northern Star" which is an apprentice fanfic.

3. This was a request/suggestion by Star of Airdrie.

"Come join Scientology, the one true religion!"

"Uh…no thank you, sir."

Slade began to shove pamphlets into unsuspecting peoples' hands. Although he was undeniably drunk he knew that he just had a life-changing experience. While drinking himself silly after his latest defeat at the hands of the Teen Titans Slade realized that something was missing in his life: spirituality.

After the bartender kicked him out of the bar Slade found his way to the local Scientology center, where the people there graciously helped him out. Now he realized his true meaning in life. He didn't have to be a villain to do great things in life!

"You know you want to join!" Slade shouted. "Come hear the story of Xeno, the tyrant ruler of the Galactic Confederacy!"

People simply gave him strange looks as they passed by. Wintergreen pushed his way through the small crowd of people.

"Sir—"

"WILL!" Slade exclaimed, shoving a piece of paper into Wintergreen's hand. "Just in time! I've discovered something quite remarkable here—"

"I've come to take you home. Slade, think of your reputation. If the Teen Titans ever found out about this then your reputation would be ruined."

"None of that matters anymore, Will. I have converted to Scientology, which is popular among the great celebrities like Tom Cruise and John Travolta."

"Oh good Lord, Slade you can't keep doing this." Wintergreen put a hand to his throbbing forehead. "You need to find a hobby or something."

"I should find another apprentice," Slade said, "then I can make him convert to Scientology."

"I'll set up another appointment with your psychiatrist—"

"NO! PSYCHIATRY IS BAD FOR YOUR BRAIN! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"

Slade took out another bottle of beer and began to drink some more. He had joined the one true religion and was content with life. He just wanted to drink some more to celebrate his wondrous epiphany.

"I'm sorry, Will, but I have an appointment with my auditor in five minutes. I'll have to leave soon."

Before Wintergreen could say anything Slade shoved the rest of the pamphlets into the butler's hands. He nearly skipped in happiness as he went inside the Scientology building.

"WE'RE GOING TO SAVE THE GALAXY!" Slade shouted. "RON HUBBARD WAS A GREAT MAN!"

A/N:

LOL Star of Airdrie wanted a crazy religious zealot Slade…and I thought that Christian zealots are overdone. Scientology is so much better. I think I was having way too much fun with this one. I kind of want to extend this one.

You know you wanna join the one true religion.