Disclaimer: Seriously, none of it's mine.


It all started when Dean muttered a simple statement: "You're killing me, Smalls!"

At first, Castiel was concerned he had actually hurt Dean- but a quick scan was enough to discard that thought.

"Dean, you are not injured," Castiel said before he frowned as he considered the term of address, "and I'm not small."

An eye-roll and a sigh were Dean's response. "Dude, it's just a quote. Man, you have got to start watching movies."

Castiel was a bit put out. Dean was constantly trying to teach him about popular culture, but it just seemed pointless. Mostly one stares at a box for hours at a time.

Not that staring wasn't one of his favorite hobbies. Indeed, he stared at people a lot, one person in particular.

He glanced at Dean who was going over the map of North Carolina, trying to find the quickest way to deal with the mountains to get back to Bobby's. Castiel knew he was crossing lines with his staring, but he couldn't help it. Dean was just…interesting to him.

He was interested in Dean, and Dean was interested in movies. Sighing, Castiel thought maybe now was a good time to begin trying to share interests.

He moved to sit at the table with Dean, staring until Dean's head angled up and their eyes met. He looked a bit frustrated. "What?"

"I wish to…watch a movie," Castiel said slowly, trying to gauge Dean's reaction.

Green eyes lit up, in happiness or amusement Castiel wasn't quite sure, but then, it didn't really matter. Dean seemed pleased with the idea in some way, so he would continue.

"Awesome! Anything in particular? Maybe something X-rated?"

The suggestiveness in his voice made Cas uncomfortable. He shook off his discomfort, "I thought, perhaps, the movie you were referencing earlier might be a good starting point."

Dean seemed to agree, and managed to find The Sandlot online and they huddled together to watch it on Dean's laptop. And thus, Castiel's movie education began.

Dean laughed through the whole movie, but Castiel still didn't understand.

Why is it funny that the boy, Scott, gets struck with a ball?

And why is Benny the only one willing to befriend a new person?

Why do the children get upset when he doesn't understand who this "Great Bambino" is?

But Castiel doesn't ask his questions. He simply waits patiently, hoping to understand Dean's earlier comment.

During the "camp out," he hears the line he has been waiting for.

"You're killing me, Smalls!"

Reflecting on Dean's use of the quote, it occurs to Castiel that he and Scott Smalls were not so different. Like Scott, he doesn't ever quite understand what the people around him are talking about, and he only connects with a select few.

Select one if he's truly honest with himself.

Since his resurrection, he found the spectrum of human emotion quite daunting. Specifically with the man next to him.

There's no doubt in his mind that Dean is the Benny to his Smalls. And he can't help but feel pleased. Benny and Scott are good friends. Benny and Scott are connected from the moment they met. Souls intertwined by Fate and Destiny. Benny helps Scott even when the others are mocking. Benny takes the lead.

The movie continues and he finds himself relating to another character- an unexpected one.

"Squints."

Not that he wears glasses- Jimmy had only had a pair for reading and those were rendered irrelevant. It's not even that he seems to know obscure history.

It's the tortured feeling of being placed so near something he wants so badly but can't have.

True, he feels more like the lifeguard- expected to jump in and save a wayward swimmer (read: save Dean's ass). But the plight of little "Squints" calls to him.

He's a bit surprised at the course of action the boy takes. He sits dumbfounded as Dean turns red from laughter.

"That's classic." Dean says before focusing on the movie again.

Castiel is confused by the statement, "Dean why is this funny? Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation is not meant to be used lightly. It's meant to save lives."

Dean sighs, head dropping slightly as he paused the movie. He gets up to get a fresh beer before explaining. "It's funny because he tricks her into kissing him."

"But she gets upset. Why do something to incite anger?" He knew what it felt like to be angry, had seen what people do under the influence of that emotion.

Dean rolls his eyes, "She's just embarrassed. He's a kid after all, and he pulled a good one on her." He opens his beer and takes a drink, but makes no move to start the movie again. Castiel thinks that Dean knew another question was coming.

"So she's not really angry?" He asked slowly, hoping he understood this facet of humanity.

Dean simply shrugged, "Maybe at first. But she did smile at him, so probably not. Now shut up so we can finish this."

When the movie ends, giving the nice summary of how the members of the team are doing at the current time, he is interested to hear that "Squints" ends up with the lifeguard- Wendy if he remembered right.

Benny and Scott are still together.

Try as he might he can't get rid of that seed of hope that was planted with this he could have that kind of relationship with Dean- that he could make Dean understand the way this movie helped him to understand.

The plan festered for weeks. Every time he tried to dismiss it the same train of thoughts ran through his brains: Dean said it was funny, Dean likes funny things, and Dean quotes funny things. It only follows that Dean would like to reenact funny things right?

So, when Sam jokingly suggested they stop at a lake- since they were in Minnesota and it apparently had 10,000 of them- Castiel agreed.

The look Dean gave him before grudgingly agreeing could probably have melted a glacier.

Maybe this wasn't a good idea after all.

When they reached the lake, Castiel waded into the water, assessing the feeling. The sensation was different than the wet of standing in the rain. While the rain was nowhere near unpleasant, this was just…nice.

He glanced back at shore to see Sam reading and Dean staring at him. Dean quickly looked away when Castiel saw him watching him.

He frowned and glanced down. He was wearing a pair of "swimming trunks" instead of his standard outfit. He felt a bit exposed but had to endure for the sake of his plan.

Looking back again, he was disheartened when he saw Dean was no longer by the water.

Sighing, he submerged himself.

It's a strange experience, being completely underwater. The weightlessness was coupled by the feeling of being embraced.

His eyes hurt a little as they tried to adjust to the murky darkness. He squinted, wondering if he should close them.

He resurfaced, a deep breath involuntarily being drawn in. He looked towards the shore, Dean seemed to be watching him curiously, a wary expression on his face.

Turning, he dove under. He intended to stay here, just deep enough for someone his vessel's height to be caught underwater.

Cas knew this was a dishonest decision. A trick. A lie. He knew he was going to steal something that doesn't belong to him. He was going to take, for himself, something that should be given. But even that couldn't stop him. He had done worse and his father had still allowed him to return to life.

He looked up, through the water towards the sky- towards Heaven, his one-time home.

Everything happened so fast. Much faster than it should have considering the time he'd put into thinking about all of this.

He heard splashing and muffled voices voice- words distorted but he could still make them out.

"Dammit, Sam, where is he?"

"I don't know! Maybe he zapped himself somewhere else?"

"Right, like he would leave without telling one of us. God, I should have known he wouldn't know how to swim."

Cas wondered if Sam considered pointing out that, as an angel, he wouldn't need to breathe. But since no words followed, he guessed neither thought of it.

When they found him, he made sure his eyes were closed, his habitual breathing motions still.

He felt arms wrap around his body, breaking the water's embrace with their own. The warmth of the sun fell across his skin when he emerged. The body attached to the arms moved quickly, dragging him to the shore- though his legs remained in the water.

A shadow- he could only assume was his "rescuer"- blocked out the sunlight. A hand pinched his nose shut and it happened. A mouth descended on his own and pushed air into his neglected lungs.

He allowed this to continue a few cycles of breathing and compressing. Finally, he convinced himself that it was best just to get it done with and prayed that Dean would understand.

When their mouths met again, he shot his arms around the body, pulling down to add pressure to the makeshift kiss.

He finally opened his eyes when his rescuer pulled away. Dean was staring down at him, water dripping from his hair while fire burned in his eyes.

What that meant, Castiel wasn't entirely sure. Nothing else gave hints to what Dean was feeling, but he was tense. Castiel gave him a slight smile, though he was sure his anxiety was showing through it.

"Been planning that for weeks." He said, hoping Dean would get the hint.

He'd never felt pain quite like when Dean glared at him before standing and walking away. Castiel sighed, and turned to look at the clouds rolling by.

Sam stood by, obviously confused and curious but not sure how to say what he wanted to say.

As soon as they were all dried off, Dean ushered them to the car and hit the road. Hard

All three were silent as they drove in search of a motel; only the strains of Neil Young's Freedom album combated the tension in the group.

The parking lot they finally pulled into was mostly empty, but the desk light was on so they had found their place of rest. Castiel was sitting in the backseat, fully intending to stay out there all night if it would ease the tension in the group.

As the car shifted into park and the engine became quiet. Dean gave Sam a look and Sam stared back for a few seconds and nodded before exiting the car and moving towards to desk.

"The silence was deafening" had never made as much sense to Castiel as it did in that moment. He and Dean were sitting in the car, and he was watching him warily from the backseat. Dean's hands were still on the wheel, his grip tight.

They sat there until Sam returned with a key to a room. He grabbed his duffle and laptop out of the trunk and left them alone once more.

Honestly, Castiel didn't pay attention to how much time passed.

"Get out of the car, Cas."

The use of his nickname made him feel better, like he hadn't completely ruined everything by trying to express his feelings in a way he thought Dean would understand.

But the tone reminded him of the Green Room. When Dean had determinedly stated that they "were done."

Like then, pain jolted him from the inside and he swallowed the knot in his throat while pleading "Dean…"

"Now."

He didn't trust himself to be able to zap himself properly, even the short distance. He opened the car door and slid out.

He wasn't expecting to hear Dean's door open and slam shut. He barely turned before he was shoved against the Impala, Dean's face angry and pained and his hands gripping the front of Castiel's coat.

Their eyes met and Castiel saw that same fire burning in Dean's green eyes. A sneer was set where Castiel had hoped only a smile would exist.

"What the fuck did you think you were doing? Pretending to drown? That's not funny, Cas!" He snarled, making Castiel focus once more. Dean shook him for emphasis.

"I was following The Sandlot…" He responded, hoping that would make everything clear. He was pleased to see some of Dean's anger fade, but it was replaced by confusion. The grip on his shirt loosened just a bit.

"The Sandlot?"

"Yes, 'Squints' and 'Wendy.'" He said, elaborating without really elaborating.

A disbelieving expression dawned on Dean's face; a nervous laugh escaped and an uncertain grin was now gracing his lips. Castiel felt joy spread through him- Dean understood, and he wasn't angry!

"Dude, next time you feel like copying something from a movie, ask me about it first, okay? You should really understand what's happening."

A flare of anger rose as Dean started to move away. Castiel's hand shot out and wrapped around his wrist. Dean looked pointedly at it before meeting his eyes, but Castiel wasn't going to let it end like this. Not now when he had finally convinced himself to act.

"You're the one who doesn't seem to 'understand what's happening,' Dean."

Dean rolled his eyes, "Cas, you don't just go kissing people because they did it in a movie!"

"I didn't!" Dean's expression- similar to an animal warily meeting humans for the first time- led Castiel to believe he must sound and look as dismayed as he feels. "I am tired of hiding my feelings, Dean. I thought…" He paused.

What had he thought? That Dean would suddenly verbally declare that he cares about him? That he could have more than he was settling for? That they would get married and have nine kids?

"I thought you understood. I gave everything. For you." Despite Dean's failures, Castiel was still there with him.

And then Dean did that thing Castiel had always found distracting. His eyes lowered, scanning his body as his tongue wet his lips. And their eyes met again.

It was contemplative, unsure, and completely enticing.

Castiel actually snapped.

His free hand shot out, grabbing the back of Dean's head and pulling forward. He kissed Dean again, the experience totally different this time- Whether from the fact that he was being honest this time or from Dean's arms securing themselves around him, he wasn't entirely sure.

When they pulled apart, both were smiling. Dean looked happy, and Castiel was thrilled. They stood together in silence, their hold on each other firm.

"So," Dean began with a deep breath, "is this like…going to be a thing between us?"

Castiel's smile faded. How could Dean still not know? He knew Dean wasn't used to discussing feelings or commitment; but he thought for sure the message would have gotten through to him.

One step forward, two steps back.

The disappointment seemed to be crushing him, he tried to pull away, but Dean was still holding him. He opened his mouth to speak, but couldn't seem to find any words. He looked at everything, anything, around them, trying not to look at Dean.

"Because I'd like it to be."

Castiel tensed. He looked back at Dean- who looked about as anxious as he felt. His grip on Castiel tightened, his eyes clearly conveying a message: Don't leave me. Not now.

Cas smiled shyly once more, "Me too."

Dean's grin widened and he nodded, "Good."

They stayed out a while longer, basking in each others company as they had never allowed themselves to before.

When they began their walk towards the motel room, Dean chuckled.

"You know, I can totally picture you as the nerdy, glasses-wearing kid and me as the hot lifeguard."

Castiel smiled, "Yes, there are some similarities. But I feel we are more like Benny and Scott."

Dean stopped, "How are we anything like Benny and Scott?" He paused and seemed to think about it and shook his head. "You know what, I think you're right." He gives Castiel a lewd smile. "Except for the kissing part- not sure that's exactly family fun."

Castiel smiles and nods in agreement. A thought crosses his mind, and the humor of it causes him to snort and look towards a light in the distance.

"What is it?" Dean asks.

Castiel looks back at him, a smirk on his face. "Well, there are two things I know for sure. One- Benny and Scott are gay." He paused, waiting for Dean to prepare for what he plans to say next.

"And?" Dean's amusement is clear, so Castiel decides it's safe to proceed.

"And two...I love you, Dean."

Dean's eyes widen, and his jaw drops. They stay like this, Dean in silent wonder and Castiel with a silent ball of everything.

Then, Dean smiles again. He slips an arm around Castiel's shoulder and begins the walk towards their motel room. Just before they reach the door Dean speaks, "You're killing me, Smalls."


AN: So, I love the Sandlot and I love Supernatural- so I threw them together and this is what came out.

And honestly? My stomach hurts from all the fluff, but I couldn't convince myself to write a different ending- it just felt like it fit despite its OOCness.

I hope you enjoyed it regardless!