'I still like that tie'

'This tie still likes you. This tie has some fond memories of you. And your headboard.'

'Not all good.'

'Well, the headboard bit was good. Until I got all... you know... Blah.'

'Now I understand why.'

'You are a very understanding person. Brilliant taste, too. Obviously. I mean, you're here with me...'

'Modest as always, Doctor.'

'No point in false modesty, I find.'

'And something you could ever be accused of being guilty of.'

'Cheek! Watch it or my tie and I will leave you to it... Oooh, that sounds good... My tie and I. I'm a poet...'

' "And you didn't know it". I get the idea.'

'That's it. If we are not to be taken seriously, we are leaving -'

'You're going to take your tie and leave. What a shame. I had some big plans for you and Mr Swirly, as well. Never mind...'

' "Mr Swirly"?'

'The tie. I call him "Mr Swirly". '

'And you dare to call me mad... The woman who names ties'

'Says the alien who sleeps with his sonic screwdriver in his hand...'

'Oi! You never know when a sonic screwdriver will come in handy! In fact, I don't recall any complaints from you that time I resonated your cl-'

'It doesn't matter. I don't think we need to hear any more of that, Doctor.'

'Oh, what a big spoilsport. And I thought you were fun, too.'

'Look who's talking! You're the one threatening to pack up your toys and go away.'

'Toys? Now you didn't mention toys! If we're going to use toys, you can call the tie what you damn well please. Call it George, if you want... Actually, no. Knew a rather rude Jentovian by the name of George. She was a nasty piece of work. Had the cheek to call me 'mouthy' and then wallop me in a very sensitive area - '

'I'm liking the sound of this George. Can we find her so I can shake her hand?'

' - And us Time Lords don't take kindly to being slapped round the legs, let me tell you. Stings like mad and leaves a nasty red mark. Oh, and it's flipper.'

'Sorry?'

'Flipper. She had flippers, not hands. Well, I say flipper, they are flipper-like appendages, but with a rudimentary thumb arrangement that...'

'What ARE you on about now? There was I, expecting some basic kinky sex involving me, you and Mr Swirly, and it's suddenly about you being bitch slapped by George. And flippers.'

'Flipper-LIKE. And there is nothing basic about sex with you. Kinky or otherwise.'

'I'm not sure if I should be flattered or insulted by that.'

'Oh, flattered. Definitely flattered. Told you first time we met, I don't just pounce on anyone.'

'Still not sure...'

'Oi, being cheeky again? Cheeky woman! Blimey, you and Emily Pankhurst... Come on then – "Mr Swirly" and I would like to take you up on your rather lovely offer. Kinky or otherwise.'

'I'll try and make sure 'Mr Swirly' is not disappointed.'

'Ta. Oh, and by the way... You mentioned toys?'

'Yessss?'

'Did I tell you about the new "Rabbit" function I've added on to the old Sonic?'

'Ahh. No, you didn't. I think that means the "basic"part of "basic kinky sex" just left the TARDIS.'

'Oh, Brilliant!'