Xion and Aang, Stuck in a Plane, With a Vase

Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh or Kingdom Hearts – I mean Avatar and Kingdom Hearts. I just get so used to saying that so much.

In the world of the Avatar, planes are not supposed to exist.

Leonardo Da Vinci never existed in Aang's world; everything was just primitive and cavemen-like.

That is, until Aang paid a visit to the Ba Sing Se International Airport.

Two weeks after Team Avatar met in the Jasmine Dragon for tea, the bending master received a distress call from some local workers at the airport stating that some Water Tribe soldiers were attacking the airport because they had been laid off. When Aang called them by messenger hawk and asked them why the hell they would hire WATER TRIBE workers at an EARTH KINGDOM airport, one of them told him, also by hawk,

"What's an Air Nomad to tell us who we can and can't hire?"

That worker was widely greeted by a kick in the balls when Aang finally arrived.

Aang managed to subdue the workers by knocking them all unconscious with some photos of Sokka posing naked for Avatar Monthly Magazine. After cleaning up the yellow water the waterbenders created because of the incident and reaching a compromise with the workers, Aang walked out of the airport and proceeded to climb onto Appa.

"Well it was nice helping you guys!" Aang waved to the airport workers standing outside, who all gave him the middle finger.

Aang had stored yellow water in the staff bathrooms with a combination of Waterbending and Airbending.

Not a pretty sight.

Suddenly, something unexpected happened. Appa began to moan terribly. His fur was shaking beyond relief.

Aang started vibrating, and started stroking Appa's shaking fur lovingly. "Appa? What's wrong, buddy?"

But it had no effect. Appa merely groaned even louder, this groan sounding very faint and weak. It wasn't even that loud; it was merely as loud as an injured lion's roar.

A worried look appeared on Aang's face. "This isn't good!" Then he got off Appa and spoke to the workers. "Do you know what happened to my bison?"

The reply was met by more obscene finger gestures.

"Okay, I'm sorry I flooded your bathrooms with the yellow water the Water benders tried to attack me with!"

One of the workers on the far left cried out, "That wasn't yellow water, you idiot! That was pee! PEE!"

Aang gulped, and his mouth dropped down to the ground, followed by multiple sweat drops coming down from the back of his head.

Flashback

After Aang defeated the Water Tribe workers, he laid back and fell to the ground. "Ah! Another job well done!"

It had taken him a lot of effort to round up all the unconscious workers in the conference room, give a big lecture on why strikers were not justified in their actions and why they should accept what life gives them, and store all of the yellow water in the staff bathrooms.

And now he wanted to relax, dream beautiful dreams of playing in the wide open fields, watch the Air Nomad kids jump over the white fence, and seeing Katara and her black flowing hair on the beach…

That was when Appa started growling.

Aang woke up from his nap. "You okay, pal?"

Appa stuck his tongue out. Aang understood what this meant. He was thirsty.

But as Aang looked around, he could not find any water. Until he looked below him, that is.

Then, slowly, Aang bended the yellow water in the air and started moving the water into Appa's mouth…

End Flashback

Appa started gagging, and all Aang could do was say, "D-Did you say pee?" His voice was now shaky and he was stammering in fear.

"BLEAH!" The bison puked over everyone in his path; the Avatar, the Earth Kingdom airport workers, and the airport itself were now covered in slimy, filthy vomit complete with giant chunks of white cheese, a day's worth of chewed-up hay, and other sick, disgusting things that must be censored for readership reasons.

20 minutes later

And that was how Aang was forced to take the plane back to the Southern Water Tribe, instead of flying on his bison. The air bender breathed a sigh of boredom and laid back in his seat. He was sitting on the left side of the plane, with his shaven tattooed head leaning on the glass window. Aang wasn't in the mood for sightseeing; he had done enough goofing off for one lifetime. Secretly, Aang promised himself he would have a lot more fun in his next life.

Suddenly, Aang was aroused from his seat by something touching his chest. It was big and round and squishy, but Aang's eyes were closed, so he didn't know what it was. Afraid to open his eyes, he left them closed. But the object soon started to rub harder on his chest, and the eyes in Aang's head started to twitch uncontrollably. Then it started moving upward, leaving his chest and moving up his neck. The hairs on Aang's neck started to sweat and stand upward, and there was a feeling of lust entering the Avatar's brain, which was strange considering his Air Nomad heritage and the teachings of the monks to give up earthly desires such as sex.

But wait a minute! SEX? How the hell did that unforgivable word get in his mind? Even though he knew he was going to regret it, Aang opened his eyes:

A girl's butt was on his neck, throbbing and covered in a black coat. The girl who it belonged to must have sensed Aang open his eyes, for she instantly turned around and did a stereotypical white girl gasp.

"Oh!" She made outbursts like a white girl too. Typical. "I'm so sorry, mister! I didn't notice you there!"

Aang could tell the horny girl was lying, but kept his mouth shut anyway.

"That's…all right." The nomad was quick to forgive, given his childlike nature that still endured 100 years later. "It happens."

"Good!" The black haired girl sat next to Aang, but did so very slowly, so as to show the twelve year old her firmly shaped butt. Aang did his best to look away; he did not feel in the mood to fantasize about a fourteen year old girl's extremities.

No matter how much he wanted to.

But Aang was an Air Nomad, and those kind of sexual pleasures were below someone like him. He was going to ignore this horny girl, withstand the flight, and return to the Southern Water Tribe like nothing had happened.

And then he would rape his water bender girlfriend as a reward for his good behavior.

"I'm Xion, by the way, thank you for asking!" Xion smirked and started putting on lipstick.

Aang squinted in annoyance and put a hand to his forehead. "I never asked you."

"You didn't?" Xion sounded annoyed. "Well that's a shame. I'm a very pretty girl, and I think you deserve to know who I am!"

The next 20 minutes were like this: Xion was bragging about random nothings, and Aang was doing all in his Avatar might to restrain himself from strangling the slut. It was so obvious she wanted to have sex with him. And he couldn't let that happen.

"So I was going to this one world with Roxas. Cute boy, I'll say that. But he is SUCH an airhead! You can SO tell he's a virgin! I mean, he didn't even get HALF of the subliminal messages I was sending his way. When I was sitting down slowly, like I was with you, he thought my legs were BROKEN! Can you believe that?"

I don't WANT to believe that. Aang had been reduced to just thinking his answers as opposed to mumbling them half-heartedly. First he fed Appa the yellow pee, now this? What next..

Things never tended to go well for Aang when he fed Appa the yellow pee. The first time he did it, Appa was stolen by Sand Benders a few days later. The second time he had done it, Aang had been ambushed by muscular bodybuilders who had accused him of harassing a Fire Nation girl. And now, he was stuck on a plane with a horny girl in a black coat.

Oh, his aching tattooed head.

Eventually, Xion pulled out a package and showed it to Aang. "Look at this! It's a special vase that I got from the Earth Kingdom!" She tore up the packaging and revealed a blue vase. That was the only way to describe the vase. There was nothing special about the vase at all. It was dull. Just really dull and boring that it was bland enough to describe how Aang was feeling at the moment.

"It looks great!" Aang pulled off a toothy grin and fake cheery disposition. It seemed to work.

"Want to take a look at it?" Xion then made a strange expression that seemed to freak Aang out. Her eyes were bulging out of her eye sockets, and her tongue was slightly sticking out of her mouth, almost trembling. Her face was trembling and sweating also, and Aang could have sworn for a moment that Xion had raised her eyebrows.

Aang, being the idiot that he was, took the vase in his hands without question.

It was at the moment he put his hands on the vase that Xion removed her hands.

The vase then crashed to the ground and shattered into a thousand pieces.

"You bastard!" She slapped Aang across the face. Then she did something out of the ordinary. She grabbed Aang's face and kissed him deeply, tasting the air bender as much as she could. Then she finally pulled away, only to slap him again.

"You broke my priceless vase, and now you're gonna pay for it!"

"What's all that noise back there," the pilot said, although he didn't seem to care so much.

"Nothing!" Xion replied sweetly, then turned back to Aang and whispered, "I'll forget this happened if you do one thing for me."

"And what would that be?" Aang replied sarcastically, because he knew exactly where this was going.

"You and I are going to ride the hobby horse." Xion frantically stripped out of her outfit so that she was wearing nothing but…well, nothing.

Aang breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, that's good. I thought we were going to have sex."

But he could talk no further, for Xion had removed his shirt and kissed him again.

What followed next was the ripping of clothes, repetitious moans, kissing noises, and Xion screaming, "YEAH BABY! GIVE ME SOM MORE! WOOHOO!"

The pilot did not hear any of this, for he had already gone to sleep, putting on earplugs and keeping the ship on Autopilot.

And that was how the Avatar lost his virginity to a horny girl named Xion.

When he finally returned to the Water Tribe, the first thing Katara saw was his tattered clothes, the white substance staining his pants, and the love bites planted over his face, especially over his tattoo, so that it lost its blue color and became red.

All that she asked was, "Did you feed Appa the yellow pee agan?"

Aang nodded.

"Okay then. Could you step inside the igloo with me? We need to have a little chat!" As Aang stepped inside, Katara grabbed the bucket of water outside her igloo and started bending an ice knife with the hand behind her back…

The End