A/N: This has taken me forever to write. It was spawned by my Iron Man and Transformers crossover, where I said there might be implied slash, but then Tony and Rhodey started getting a teeny bit too close for it to remain implied. Then I listened to the song "Animals" by Nickelback and the plot bunnies started having a rave in my head.

Disclaimer: I do not own Iron Man

Summary: Tony convinces Rhodey go out for a drive, distracting him from work. Tony also finds a way to distract Rhodey whilst He's driving. Tony/Rhodey slash, don't like don't read. Smut!

Drink and Drive

"Come on, Rhodey." Tony pleaded, pouring out a third glass of scotch for himself. "Let's go out for a drive. It's a beautiful summer evening and I'll let you drive the R8. Besides, you're meant to be on leave. Stop working."

"No." Rhodey insisted. He was sitting in the lounge with Tony, hunched over the coffee table, with various pieces of military paperwork spread over it in front of him and a pen in his hand. Tony was sitting opposite, with his elbows on his knees and his chin resting on his hands, staring intently at his best friend. "Some of us have to work for a living, Tony. I can't go out. Look at all of this."

"Finish it when we get back." Tony suggested.

"Tony... I need to get this done." Rhodey sighed angrily. Tony rolled his eyes. Rhodey was on leave. Holiday. He didn't have to work. He was using it as an excuse. "You just don't understand that some of us have to meet deadlines. We can't solve every problem with money and good looks."

"You can't, but I can." Tony sat up and stretched his arms.

"That's the point I'm trying to make!"

"Oh."

"Do you understand now?"

"..." Tony shrugged. "Can we go for a drive?"

"Do you ever give up?" Rhodey asked, and threw his pen at Tony. It hit Tony square on the forehead, and bounced onto the floor.

"Not until I get what I want." Tony replied. He leant down and picked up the pen, then placed it back down on the coffee table. He crossed his legs on the table and picked up his glass of scotch.

"Tony, your feet are on my paperwork." Rhodey growled.

"Well I'm comfortable. I'm not moving."

"..."

"What?"

"It had better be a quick drive." Rhodey said, standing up and grabbing his leather jacket, which was slung over the back of the sofa. He walked out of the lounge, towards the garage. Tony grinned and downed the rest of his scotch. He grabbed the keys off the coffee table and jogged after Rhodey.

Rhodey was leaning against the R8, waiting for Tony. Tony walked over to him and frowned. Rhodey held out his hand, and stared at Tony with a faint smile on his lips.

"Keys." Rhodey ordered.

"You didn't want to drive earlier." Tony grumbled.

"Well you've been drinking." Rhodey said. "I'm driving."

"Fine." Tony huffed and dropped the R8 keys onto Rhodey's palm. He walked around the car and climbed into the passenger seat. Rhodey climbed into the driver's seat beside him and put the key in the ignition. He started the car, and turned to smile at Tony. Tony looked at Rhodey. "Are you going to drive, or are we just going to sit here?" In answer to Tony's question, Rhodey slammed his foot down on the accelerator and they sped off into the dusk.

xXx

"Rhodey, you're driving too slow." Tony yawned.

"Tony, there is such a thing as a speed limit, and the speed limit in this area is –" Rhodey started to say. Just because Tony had no regard for road safety it didn't mean that he didn't have any either.

"Just ignore it. I do." Tony dismissed the subject with a wave of his hand. "And if you get any speeding tickets I'll pay the fine. My treat."

"Tony, I am not going to break the speed limit." Rhodey insisted. "Unlike you, I value my life in the highest degree... and if I'm breaking the speed limit it puts other people's lives in danger. Part of my job is protecting people, Tony. I am not going to break the speed limit."

"You're boring."

"What?"

"You're boring."

"You think I'm boring?" Rhodey asked.

"Yes, I do."

"Why? Because I won't break the speed limit?"

"Yes..." Tony sighed and leant back in the car seat, placing his hands on the back of his head. He smiled. "And other things."

"Like?"

"You're wearing a seatbelt."

"Tony! Put your seatbelt on!" Rhodey snapped.

"No." Tony snapped. "I am not going to put my seatbelt on. You should take yours off. Live dangerously. Get your adrenaline pumping. It might be good for you."

"Put your seatbelt on right now, or I'm stopping the car." Rhodey warned. Tony looked away from Rhodey, and stared out of the window. "Fine. I'm stopping the car." Rhodey pulled into a nearby lay-by, and switched off the engine. He turned to look at Tony. "Are you going to put your seatbelt on yet?"

"No."

"Well then we're going to be here a very long time."

"There are plenty of things we can do in this lay-by." Tony shrugged, turning to look at Rhodey. "You might not be so boring if you decide to co-operate." He winked at his best friend.

"What are you on about?" Rhodey asked.

"Oh, never mind then." Tony rolled his eyes. "Just take us home."

"Only if you put your seatbelt on." Rhodey insisted.

"Fine." Tony grumbled. He put his seatbelt on and folded his arms, a frown spread on his face.

I can't give in to what he wants. He has to learn one day that he can't have everything. Rhodey thought, twisting the key in the ignition and starting the car again. The problem is... Tony can have everything. He just has to say the word, and he has it. Am I the only one who can say no to him?

Even Rhodey had problems saying 'no' to Tony sometimes.

"Tony, put your seatbelt back on." Rhodey instructed sternly, as though he was talking to a stubborn child who refused to do as they were told. They were cruising down a windy road, the only light being the car headlights, due to the fact that it was now past sundown. "Tony, if you don't put your seatbelt back on I'll bang the brakes on and you'll be sorry when your face slams into the dashboard and you break your nose."

"..."

"Tony? Say or do something so that I know you're still alive?" Rhodey asked, keeping his eyes locked on the road ahead. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Tony shifting on his seat, and for a moment he thought Tony would do something crazy, like throw himself out of the car door.

Oh, how wrong Rhodey was.

Tony shifted on the seat so that he was sitting sideways, facing Rhodey. He slipped one of his arms around Rhodey's shoulders, and his other hand slid up Rhodey's thigh. Tony buried his face in the crook of Rhodey's neck, and began to kiss, bite and lick the skin there.

"Tony, what the hell are you doing?" Rhodey demanded, trying to edge away from his best friend. "Get off me. Sit back down and put your seatbelt on!"

"Just keep driving, Rhodey." Tony mumbled, his hot breath tickling Rhodey's neck. "Just keep driving... if you let me do this, you won't be boring."

"I am not boring!" Rhodey slammed the car brakes on, and the R8 skidded to a halt at the side of the road. Tony used this sudden stop as time to push Rhodey against the seat, and clamber over to Rhodey's side of the car. Tony was trying to climb onto his lap, but accidently leant on the steering wheel and honked the horn. Rhodey reached up and grabbed Tony's hips, pulling him down onto his lap. Rhodey undid his seatbelt, and kissed Tony's neck. Tony began to rock his hips against Rhodey, making him moan loudly. Tony pressed his lips to Rhodey's, and forced his mouth open, pushing his tongue inside. Tony's lips and tongue tasted of the scotch Tony had been downing most of the evening. Rhodey pushed Tony away and turned on the light in the roof of the car, and studied his friend's face.

"Why did you make me stop?" Tony frowned, fidgeting in Rhodey's steel-like grip. "I was enjoying that, and so were you."

"You've been drinking."

"So?"

"I don't wanna take advantage."

"Rhodey, when have you ever seen me drunk on three glasses of scotch?"

"Erm... MIT." Rhodey grinned and licked his lips. "Don't you remember that wild party you threw in the halls that night?"

"No."

"That's because you were drunk on three glasses of scotch."

"Well, I'm not drunk now." Tony shrugged. He reached up and turned the car light off. Tony's arc-reactor was the only light, illuminating them both with a soft blue glow. Tony placed his hands on either side of Rhodey's face and stroked the stubble that was forming there. "Come on, Rhodey. You want this too. And you need to shave before you go back to the air force."

"Tony, I am not having sex in a car with you."

"And this brings us back to the fact that you are boring."

"I am not boring!" Rhodey protested.

"Then prove it." Tony urged. "Have sex in a car with me like a horny teenager. Don't wear a seatbelt. Break the speed limit. Drink and drive. Live like you are a teenager, Rhodey. Just forget about being the serious, grumpy Lieutenant Colonel who always has to look after me. Let go, Rhodey. It's just you, me and the car. Do something reckless."

"Alright..." Rhodey glanced over his shoulder, then turned back to look at Tony. "There's no backseat." He could see blue flashing lights coming down the road ahead, and he could hear a siren approaching. "And the cops are probably coming because we're parked on the side of the road for no reason."

"Outrun them." Tony suggested. "I know every cop in this area, and every single one of them is corrupt. If they catch us, I'll just pay them off."

"I doubt every cop in this area is corrupt." Rhodey scoffed, starting the engine.

"You are still going to outrun them, aren't you?"

"It's not my car, so yes." Rhodey grinned and slammed his foot down on the accelerator. The R8 lurched forwards. Rhodey reached for his seatbelt, but Tony grabbed his wrist. "Are you trying to get me killed?"

"Rhodey, tonight is all about taking risks. No seatbelt."

"If I die, I'm going to haunt you... or laugh at you when you're in Hell."

"What makes you think you're going to Heaven?" Tony asked. He began to kiss Rhodey's neck, running one of his hands up Rhodey's thigh, using the other one to keep himself upwards around the bends. Rhodey threw his head back and moaned, pushing his foot down harder on the accelerator.

This is crazy. Rhodey thought, but the thought escaped his mind – along with all other rational thoughts – when Tony managed to undo his belt and slide his hand down Rhodey's trousers. Nothing mattered anymore, except for Tony, how he was touching Rhodey and how the sensation of speeding felt great along the now straight road with the windows open, and the wind battering them both.

Tony paused in his assault of pleasure to reach for the glove box, much to Rhodey's protest. Tony opened the glove box with a 'click' and pulled something out. The light from his arc-reactor reflected off the bottle of scotch. Tony fumbled with the top, and took a swig from the bottle, swallowed the scotch down. Tony leant over and forced the bottle between Rhodey's lips, tipping it up and forcing him to drink. Rhodey gulped down the liquid, feeling it burn his mouth and throat. Tony yanked the bottle away, and downed some more scotch himself.

Rhodey could no longer see the blue flashing lights, or hear the police car siren. He knew they were near the beach. He could smell the sea through the open windows. That meant there was a car park. Rhodey didn't bother with the indicators, and pulled into the beach car park. He didn't know whether he was in a parking space, and he didn't care. He slammed Tony against the seat, and climbed on top of him, intent on payback. Tony still had the bottle of scotch in one hand, and the other hand was on the back of Rhodey's neck, pushing their faces together and forcing their lips together.

Rhodey ran his hands up Tony's t-shirt and felt the warm, muscular skin beneath his hands. Tony reached for the seat recliner and tilted the car seat backwards, so that it was almost horizontal. Rhodey straddled Tony's waist, trying to get his balance on the small car seat. He really wished that the R8 had a backseat now. Tony dropped the bottle of scotch onto the driver's seat and clawed at Rhodey's leather jacket with his hands. Rhodey looked good enough in his leather jacket, but he would look even better without it. Rhodey shrugged his jacket off his shoulders and Tony pulled it off, throwing it over the back of the seats.

Rhodey pulled Tony up off the seat, so that he could pull his t-shirt off over his head. Tony's t-shirt joined Rhodey's leather jacket. He pushed Tony back down onto the seat, pinning him with one hand whilst he worked at undoing Tony's belt with his other hand – his didn't need to be undone, as Tony had undone his belt whilst he had been driving. Tony reached up and grabbed the front of Rhodey's shirt and tore it open, making the buttons bounce everywhere.

"Oops." Tony giggled, reaching for the bottle of scotch again.

"Damn it, Tony. This was one of my favourite shirts."

"Relax, I'll get someone to sew the buttons back on." Tony said, reaching for the bottle of scotch. "And I think it looks better that way." He grabbed the bottle of scotch and unscrewed the top, downing some more of it. Tony looked at the rapidly emptying contents. "We're going to need another bottle soon."

"No, we won't." Rhodey said, he took the bottle of scotch from Tony and took another swig himself. "We won't be able to drive anywhere to get another bottle. We'll both be way over the limit by the time we finish this one."

"Oh well." Tony shrugged and grabbed Rhodey's open shirt, pulling him back down on top of him. "You didn't object to drink driving on the way here."

"That's because you forced me to."

"Oh did I?"

"Shut up, Tony." Rhodey snapped and pressed his lips to Tony's again. Tony pulled Rhodey's shirt down his arms and then off, and threw it onto the dashboard. Tony pulled Rhodey's belt out of the loops on his jeans, and threw that somewhere in the back of the car too.

Rhodey began to tackle Tony's belt once again and lifted Tony's hips so that he could take it off. Tony grinded his hips against Rhodey, making his friend moan. It was so rewarding to see Rhodey so relaxed and undone. Everything that was the relationship Tony and Rhodey shared was passing between them in this moment – affection, frustration, tension, reliance, relief lust, need, want – everything that they had ever felt.

Tony's ass-hugging jeans were the next item of clothing to go, and Rhodey discovered that Tony wasn't wearing underwear.

That's why he never gets any lines under those jeans... Rhodey thought as Tony undid his trousers and started to try and yank them down, along with his boxers. Soon both of them were stark naked and moaning and groaning on the front seat, drenched in sweat with their lips locked together in ferocious kisses. Rhodey began to kiss Tony's jaw and neck, and inserted his fingers into Tony's mouth for him to suck on.

Tony's breathing deepened with the anticipation of what was coming next, and the fact that he could only breath through his nose at the moment, with Rhodey's fingers in his mouth. Rhodey down the remainder of the scotch and threw the bottle into the back of the car. They heard a smash, and Tony mumbled something unintelligable. Rhodey removed his fingers from Tony's mouth and trailed them down his chest.

Rhodey pushed a finger into Tony, making him grunt. Rhodey then added a second finger, and then a third, making sure that Tony was properly stretched for him. Rhodey removed his fingers and helped Tony to roll over in the enclosed space of the car, so that he was laying on his front.

"You ready?" Rhodey whispered, nipping Tony's ear.

"Rhodey, I've been ready ever since MIT." Tony answered breathlessly.

"Well brace yourself." Rhodey warned and pushed into Tony. Tony grunted again and gripped onto the car seat, digging his nails into the upholstery. Rhodey began to thrust in and out of Tony more rapidly, propping himself up with his palms splayed flat on the seat, either side of Tony's head. Rhodey knew he had hit the spot when Tony began moaning and groaning instead of grunting. Rhodey felt himself climax, and heard Tony climax as he moaned even louder and spilled on the car seat.

Rhodey pulled out of Tony and collapsed on top of him, wrapping his arms around him. Both of them were hot, sweaty, breathless and exhausted.

"You're helping me clean the interior in the morning." Tony mumbled sleepily.

"It is morning now." Rhodey murmured, burying his face in the crook of Tony's neck so that Tony couldn't see the embarrassment on his face. "Tony, I love you."

"That's something I've been waiting to hear ever since MIT." Tony chuckled. "I love you too."

xXx

Rhodey woke up and his mind felt fuzzy. His ears felt like they were plugged with cotton wool and he blamed it all on the scotch he had been drinking last night. He struggled to open his eyes, and remembered last night when he saw Tony laying in his arms, still asleep with his head rested on Rhodey's chest. Rhodey watched Tony for a while, watching the rise and fall of his chest and the constant light of the arc-reactor. Rhodey never thought that anything like this would ever happen between him and Tony. He thought that Tony was too fond of wild nights out and women whose names he didn't and wouldn't ever know.

Rhodey grabbed his clothes and slid out of the car, gently laying Tony's head on the still horizontal car seat. He walked down to where the sea was crashing down on the shore and looked around. It was starting to get light, and there was a sliver of red on the horizon and Rhodey realised the sun wasn't even up yet. The beach was empty, so Rhodey decided to take a swim in the sea to clean himself up.

When he was done, Rhodey pulled his clothes back on and rolled the bottoms of his jeans up. He stood in the shallows, watching the water swirl around his ankles. There was more than a sliver of red on the horizon now. He had an idea.

xXx

Tony awoke with a start to someone knocking on the car window. It was Rhodey. He was wearing his shirt that no longer had buttons, and had his jeans rolled up. He was soaking wet and he opened the car door and climbed onto the seat with Tony, holding him against him. Tony groggily looked up at Rhodey and snuggled against his chest.

"Why are you up so early?" Tony mumbled. "Is the sun even up yet?"

"I went for a wash in the sea. No-ones around at this time of the morning so I took advantage of that." Rhodey smiled and lazily ruffled Tony's hair. "And the sun is just coming up."

"Why am I awake this early?" Tony groaned, sitting up and reaching for his jeans.

"Because I just woke you up." Rhodey said. "Now, are you coming out to watch the sun come up?"

"I've seen the sun come up before. Yeah, it's impressive for about the first five times. After that you start to think 'why aren't I in bed?'" Tony scowled, pulling his jeans on with his back to Rhodey.

"You've never watched the sun come up with me." Rhodey whispered and placed a soft kiss on Tony's shoulder blade.

"Don't you remember that wild party I threw in the halls at MIT? The one where I was apparently drunk on three glasses of scotch." Tony grinned. "I remember watching the sun come up with you there."

"You said you didn't remember that party earlier."

"I can't remember if I remember it or not." Tony shrugged. "Do you remember watching the sun come up together?"

"No, I don't remember it. That's why you're coming with me now." Rhodey said, dragging Tony out of the car.

They sat on the front of the R8 together, with Tony resting his head on Rhodey's shoulder. The car was already enough of a mess. A little sea water and finger prints all of the windscreen and exterior wouldn't matter. It would just be more work for the poor sod who had to clean the car – most likely Happy.

"When do you wanna head home?" Rhodey asked.

"When the beach starts to get crowded." Tony replied. "For now, I just want to stay here with you." He pressed a kiss to Rhodey's soft lips, tasting the salty sea water on them.

End.

A/N: Thanks to everyone who has read this. I keep seeing Audi R8's near where I live and they send me into a fangirl fit. I was in my friend's car the other day and we saw two. I think that he thinks I'm even stranger now after my squeeing and flailing. It's a good thing he doesn't know why I was squeeing and flailing ;)

Anyway, thank you for reading and if you have the time drop me a line. I love to see what people think and I'll take your comments into consideration.

I Caught Myself.