Looks like I have my creepy mojo back. Not sure if that's a good thing…

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Let it go, let it all go.

Pip took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he visualized working at the hard knot of anger and hatred in his chest. Once he got them untied he simply let the lines of feeling be pulled out of him, leaving him empty and hollow. He tried to put strings of happiness back where they had been, but it was like he was a bottomless pit. Oh well, he would have to settle for emptiness, then.

Damien came back in the room, smiling as if nothing had happened.

Let it go, let it all go.

He had to tell himself again as the rage boiled up within him, as if it had never left. He just smiled back and patted the chair beside him.

"It's ok, Pip. I forgive you." He said with a benevolence that made Pip seethe. He should be the one apologizing, not Pip. But if he dared say that Damien would throw a temper tantrum and he'd rather be eaten alive by anger than drive Damien away.

Let it go, let it all go.

He gave another smile, the practiced gesture seeming effortless and genuine, though it was neither. "Thank you so much, love. I know I was horrible, it's so kind of you to forgive me." He said, looking up at Damien shyly and apologetically. The poor bastard didn't even know a thing.

Let it go, let it all go.

Later than night as Damien slept, Pip stood by the side of the bed just staring at him, his mind blank and his heart a hard ball of anger. He reached out his hands, one curling around Damien's neck. But he blinked and came back to himself, retracting the hand and crawling into bed.

Let it go, let it all go.

The days continued in the same way, Pip taking every hit with a smile. Every once in awhile he would say something when it all got to be too much, but then Damien would go berserk, leave the house, and refuse to talk to Pip no matter what he did.

Let it go, let it all go.

Dammit, he was allowed to be angry, too! Couldn't he release his bad feelings every once in awhile? But no, he had to take it all with a smile and a "Right-o!" But not anymore. He was going to do something tonight. Damien would no longer rule over him. The anger would stop now and he would finally be able to

Let it go, let it all go.

He stood over the sleeping form of his lover again, but this time there was no blank stare or empty hands. His eyes were wild and glinting maliciously and in his hands were seven daggers. Dangerous mirth and morbid glee danced in his heart as he plunged the knives in one at a time, reveling in the sounds of protest and pain his lover made.

Let it go, let it all go.

That's right Damien, let go of life. Leave the mortal plane and burn in the pits of hell with your father. It's where you belong, after all. Traitorous dog, pitiful wretch. See if anyone crossed Pip Pirrup ever again! You certainly never would. Your last scream as you left this earth was the most beautiful sound I've ever heard! Rot in hell for your sins against me, for I will join you there soon and make your eternity unbearable.

Let it go, let it all go.

Pip finally calmed down, the rage and hate flooding out of him as they were replaced with a deep ache of self-loathing and sorrow. He looked over at the sleeping form of Damien and kissed the top of his head before crawling back into bed and falling asleep beside him, ready to face another day of fake smiles and hidden anger.

Just before he finally fell asleep he repeated his mantra, telling himself to just

Let it go, let it all go.

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Hope you like it. I didn't enjoy writing it, but I think it turned out ok.