My Best Friend's Girl.

A/N: These are not my characters and this isn't entirely my plot. I own nothing, just the joy of seeing my Jake in different situations.

Chapter 1 Meet Mr. Dickhead

"Damn baby you feisty, Oh and I love when you sway those hips for me." The tall dark and sexy man named Jake said, trailing behind a pretty blond that was fiddling with her keys, rushing to enter her apartment.

"Hey now there's no need to rush baby Jakey's Alpha will be in your mouth in due time."

Ugh the girl disgruntled loudly at his rude disgusting advances. After finally getting the door open she turns to face him while he's lighting up a joint and takes a hit.

While holding in the smoke he passes it to her, "You're so uptight, I bet if a stick a coal up your ass you'd shit out the hope diamond in a week. So here take a hit and relax Jake's here to take good care of you."

She huffed "OMG" and slammed the door in his face. He took another puff with a cocky grin on his face and counted to five. Almost done, he told himself while flicking the joint towards the sidewalk and returning to knock on the door with a familiar beat. Dun dudda dun dun, dun dun. The outraged women reopened the door staring at this insane man and yelled.

"What!" She questioned.

"The door must have been accidently closed and locked by the wind" He annoyingly stated, egging the infuriated lady on. "Any who, I was thinking that maybe we can start with a blowjob, obviously." He winks at her and smiles. "I won't deprive you of that privilege; I know how much women love sucking cock, especially one as succulent as mine."

He continued his bantering, while reaching for a Newport and sparking it.

"Afterwards we can move on to some of the nastier kinky stuff, I'll call over some off my homeboys to participate in a gangbang, maybe some double penetration, and you'll love it. We'll have you screaming in no time, especially with the monster cocks we're sporting."

Then he leans his forearm on the door frame crossing one leg over the other, "You ready for the best part? When we're all done destroying your oral orifices we will release all of our jizz on your face. So what do you say? Doesn't that sound promising?" He finished while blowing smoke in her face and biting his lip.

After looking at him in astonishment for ten seconds she spits out, "You fucking Asshole!"

She slams the door shut again. He laughs and knocks again.

The women reopens the door wondering what the attractive yet biggest dickhead she has ever met could possibly be thinking in that thickheaded brain of his. He must be insane; he couldn't possibly think this was acceptable behavior.

Once the door was wide open and the blond stared at him in a shocked expression he asked pouting. "I don't mean to be rude sweet cheeks but what is wrong? You seem upset, I can't help but think that maybe I did something wrong?" He tilted his head to the side like a puppy dog playing the innocent card.

"Is something wrong? How about I tell you ten things you did?" She yelled. Replaying the god awful date they just had in her mind she began stating all his unruly actions.

1: Everything that just came out your mouth just now, including the sexual suggestions.

2: You asked me to go half on gas with you.

3: Before you dropped me off, not only did you drive recklessly.

4: But you where on the phone with your ex girlfriend,

5: discussing the fact that you slept with her sister but that it was okay because it was dark and thought it was her.

6: On top of that you impregnated them both and expressed how little you cared by informing them of the donation you were planning on making to Planned Parenthood in her honor.

7: The restaurant we went to has probably not had a health inspection ever.

8: Then you told the waiter to bring me a salad, that I needed to avoid fried foods. Implying that I'm fat.

9: On our drive to the restaurant you played loud obnoxious rap music that degraded and insulted all women and

10: Lastly when we first introduced ourselves you hugged me and squeezed my ass.

So I'd have to say that everything you did and said tonight was completely inappropriate and unbelievably the worst date I have ever been on in my entire life. Now, leave me alone, erase my number and GO FUCK YOURSELF!" She finished slamming the door shut. I turned around suppressing a laugh. I opened my phone and dialed one of my many clients.

"Hey man, I just dropped her off. I suggest you get your ass over here quickly to console her from the worst date she's ever had. Remember the more she hates me the more she'll realize she loves you. Did you drop off the money with Quil at the bar? Alright, I'll let you go, let me know how it turns out."

I shut the phone, jumped in my car and started the engine. Making my way back to my house. I know what you guys must be thinking, who the fuck is this asshole? And what makes him think he can just disrespect women, the way he just did?

Well first I'll start by introducing myself. My name is Jacob Black aka Asshole, prick, douche bag, dickhead. You name it, I've been called it. I'm a Native American born and raised in La Push, WA. While growing up I caught a lot of attention from the opposite sex, women would throw themselves at me left and right. I mean who wouldn't? I'm 6'3 weigh 205 lbs of pure raw muscle. With no fat located anywhere on this rock hard body. I'm tan and I have a killer panty dropping smile. (So I've been told) Unfortunately, I was majorly shy. So I was clueless when it came to what women wanted. I started dating having no trouble attaining a girl, but keeping them, that was a problem. I always gave my all when it came to my girl's from picking flowers, to love letters, hell even romantic moonlight dinners on the beach. But what did that get me? Nothing but a broken heart. After falling deeply in love with my first "real" girlfriend Jessica, I found out I was being played. I caught her in her bed with the town's biggest asshole ever Paul. He was a disrespectful, disgusting and a major jerk. Months after our breakup, Jessica explained how she never meant to hurt me but that she only saw me as her best friend. Her explanation was like a punch in the gut. I gave her everything and still came out losing.

A few months later I lost my mom, she was killed by a drunk driver. My father, who was in the car with my mom, was paralyzed and depressed. This forced me to become a man quickly. I had to make money to pay the bills and maintain the house, while my older twin sister's abandoned us. I was good with my hands, and cars. So I began doing mechanic work, but I soon realized that in order to make sufficient funds I'd have to quit school and work full time. That was unacceptable in my eyes. I wanted more and would only achieve that by graduating high school and getting a degree. So I had to way my options and explore other qualities I possessed that would help pay the bills on a part time basis. That's when the idea came to mind. I thought of my previous relationship and the end result, which always proved that the good looking asshole got the girl in the end and the best friend was pushed aside. As they say, nice guys finish last. So I decided I would be the asshole and like I mentioned before, my looks helped attain the girls. This brings me to my current position. I date for money. Good guys from all over the globe paid me to date their best friend. All I had to do was act like an asshole and give them the date from hell, leaving them vulnerable, running into the arms of their best friend for comfort. Then it was up to them to prove that they were the right man for her.

So you see everyone wins in the end. The good guy gets his girl, hence finishing first for once. The girl see's what in front of her and I get paid. This gives me the satisfaction of helping my fellow men that have been pushed into the best friend category, like myself.

After finishing the date I decided I needed a little release and I had to pick up my money. I went to the neighborhood bar that two of my good friends owned, Quil and Emmett. I played a few rounds of pool with them and drank a few beers. When I decided it was time to go, I had to get back into my asshole role. The cute waitress caught my eye and I gracefully approached her passing many horny women that were eye fucking me. I noticed she was with a girlfriend and I couldn't help but fuck with her too.

I slid up to the bar in between the two. I stared at the waitress checking her out.

"Damn, look at you all white and thin, I bet if I laid you on this bar she could snort you." I smiled and gave a sarcastic laugh after pointing at her friend. "You know many people would be concerned about your health being so dangerously thin and all, but not me, what concerns me is the fact that you keep eating those peanuts, which will make you gain some pounds. So I'm kindly reminding you to put down the peanuts and keep your head in the game. Because you can't compare something that taste good, as looking good." I grabbed the peanuts and pushed them towards her friend, placing my back to her face.

"Look you asshole, how can you even begin to talk to her-" I cut her off.

"Easy there Hefty, if you'd be more concerned about your eating habits you'd probably have the attention of some fine looking gentleman such as myself, instead of being in the company of that tasty cheese burger and fries." He almost cried and yelled at me. "I just had a child!"

I bawled back at her "Well Congratulations, I'm sure he was delicious because it looks like you downed the whole thing." I laughed "You're an asshole!" She yelled while walking away.

The waitress repeated her friends works right back at me, "You really are an asshole." She said towards me and I leaned on the bar popping a peanut in my mouth. I turned towards her with my eyebrow cocked and a sexy smirk, "So walk away." I stared at her biting my lip gazing her body with my lust filled chocolate brown eyes. She stood there staring back at me with contemplated look in her eyes.

Ten minutes later I was in my car making my way towards my house, with the waitress's mouth on my cock concentrating on my driving.

A/N: Let me know if you'd like to read some more or if you'll enjoy this story. Feedback is important, It'll help decide if I should pursue this story or not. Thanks