It was late at night. Sephiroth's head spun as he stepped onto the driveway of his house. He walked sluggishly, staring at the moving ground as he made his way over to the large trash bin parked outside his front gate. He ripped the lid off and leaned into it, choking and vomiting up the entire bottle of moscato that he had drank all by himself on the long walk home. It was a jumbo bottle - quite cheap at the local tobacco store, where he'd finally gone to get his own cigarettes. He was tired of bumming them off of Cloud, and he'd needed a drink and some time to himself.

One drink had become the entire bottle. Sephiroth had turned it up and chugged it like water. Once he got past the cheap taste, it rolled down his throat easily. Cloud had gone to bed early, telling him that they had a long journey ahead of them in the morning. He still couldn't get it out of the blond about where they were going first; he just knew that Cloud was getting him the fuck out of there. He'd packed a small bag: small enough to strap onto Fenrir along with Cloud's meager belongings. Money was no big deal, thankfully. Their monthly checks from Shinra still rolled in, though they should have stopped years ago when they'd left the company.

Sephiroth groaned and shut the lid of the trash bin, shuffling down the walkway and into his house. From the darkness of the night into a dimly-lit living room, he made his way to the bathroom and brushed his teeth. He looked at his reflection in the mirror: he looked terrible, stressed. He shut off the light and ambled over to where Cloud slept on his couch, setting his shopping bag down onto the floor. He knelt beside him and brushed a blond strand of hair from his face, watching Cloud's nose wrinkle in his sleep. Sephiroth smiled, remembering their kiss from earlier that evening. It was surprisingly more erotic and passionate than anything he remembered with Genesis. While Cloud was full of life, Genesis always seemed empty. He had loved Sephiroth, sure, but now Sephiroth wondered if there was anything more than habit and comfort.

He'd wasted two years waiting on Genesis to make his way back. The notion seemed utterly ridiculous at this point, staring down and watching Cloud sleep. He wanted to curl up next to the blond and be held, be kissed again. The thought was so peculiar: Cloud had been a close friend for years. How did it suddenly escalate to... love?

He shook his head. It's not love. I still love Genesis, don't I?

Sephiroth groaned and put his head in his hands, covering his face. He wanted to cry again. He fucking hated crying. Everything he'd been taught growing up, everything he'd been through, it all made him serious and unemotional most of the time. He knew very well how to shut off his emotions and go completely on auto-pilot. When he met Genesis and they got together, all of that changed. Perhaps it was the long nights of poetry and wine, lovemaking and promises. Something had broken inside of Sephiroth, and it got worse when Genesis left.

Cloud was right: Many years ago, Sephiroth was a bit of a jokester and was fun to be around. He knew when to shut down his emotions when it counted, but for the most part, he had been as crass and foul-mouthed as Cloud and the others. He cherished the memories of weekend gatherings at his house, playing cards and drinking until the party spilled out into the street. What wasn't true was that he was "Shinra's Cum Depository", as Cloud had so eloquently put it. Before Genesis, Sephiroth had never even kissed anyone. However, that first night that they were officially together, Genesis had seduced him like the redhead was trying to put a notch in his belt. It had started at the downtown club - the shitty, backwoods Daisy Hovel - and the next thing he remembered was being fondled in the hallway of the dorm, feeling incredibly awkward and unsure. Genesis had backed him against the wall once they were in Sephiroth's room, whispering words of love as his mouth made its way to his neck. Sephiroth had stood stiffly, frozen in place as Genesis worked his slim hand into Sephiroth's pants.

"You're not enjoying this?" Genesis asked, rubbing Sephiroth's limp cock. There was a flash of anger in the redhead's eyes. "Is there something wrong with me? You don't like me or something?"

After taking some time to embarrassingly explain to him that he was nervous, Genesis laughed at him. Laughed. And then he bade him goodnight, leaving Sephiroth flustered and confused. After many rambling apologies about Mako infusions and heightened libido, Sephiroth shrugged and forgave him. After all, no one else was interested in Sephiroth. He was tired of seeing everyone around him falling in love and pairing up. Goddamn it, he wanted that, too. So for the next year or so, he let Genesis romance him in his cocky, often pushy, way. He gave into the romantic side of it, swept up in the long nights and happiness when Genesis was in his best mood. Really, when Sephiroth thought about it, Genesis had manipulated him. He'd used him up until he was done with him, leaving him alone once more.

In his drunken state, Sephiroth started weeping openly. He lay his head against the couch cushion in front of him where Cloud lay still sleeping, wetting it with his hot tears. Minutes went by - and then he felt a hand caressing the top of his head, petting his hair. He sniffled hard and raised his head up to look at the blond man, ashamed of himself. Cloud was only half-awake, lazily stroking his head.

"...Genesis is a fucking dick, and i'm drunk, and I just wanna kiss you so I can forget about his stupid face!" Sephiroth blubbered, the words spilling out of his mouth.

Cloud's sleepy expression fully reflected the fact that he hadn't even registered exactly what the silver-haired man had said. He squinted at Sephiroth. "You should probably go to bed, Seph. We've got a long ride in the morning," he mumbled. He pulled his hand away from Sephiroth's head and curled the blanket around him, balling the soft material into his fist. He started lightly snoring. Sephiroth's mouth flew open in protest, but no words came out.

Cloud had just given him the equivalent of "not tonight dear", for fuck's sake. Sephiroth scowled and dried his eyes, rummaging around in his shopping bag for a pack of cigarettes. He carefully peeled off the cellophane and opened the pack. Letting a cigarette dangle from his lips, he raised a lighter to it while staring at Cloud.

The glow from the lighter made Cloud's skin radiate. His eyes roamed over little freckles on his nose that he'd never noticed before. He clicked off the lighter and exhaled smoke toward the ceiling, then turned back to Cloud. He reached a hand over to caress his face, letting his thumb linger over his lower lip as he gently stroked it. Without any time to second-guess himself, he leaned forward and planted a kiss on those lips, careful not to wake the peaceful man. He lay his head back down beside Cloud on the cushion and sighed deeply. Cloud had stopped snoring and was stirring.

"Sephiroth."

"Hmm?" Sephiroth hummed in question. He picked his head up slightly, turned it, and was met with Cloud's face next to his.

"Would you... would you kiss me again?"

Sephiroth stubbed out his cigarette in an ashtray on the coffee table and shifted to his knees. He raised his hand and slid his fingers into Cloud's hair, holding his head and stroking his cheek with his thumb. They gazed at each other for the longest time; then, gently, Sephiroth leaned down and covered Cloud's lips with his own. This kiss was so different than the one they had shared earlier that evening, born out of an argument between two old friends. They had been heated earlier, struggling almost.

Cloud's mouth parted, giving Sephiroth full access to his warmth. It was slow and delicious, haunting and painful, all at the same time. Sephiroth tasted like sweet wine. Cloud felt as if his heart would burst as his body gave an unconscious shudder of absolute surrender. He opened his eyes as the kiss ended, blown away by the beauty of the silver tresses that now curtained his and Sephiroth's faces. Time truly seemed to stand still as they gazed at one another again.

"You are so beautiful," Cloud whispered. A tear slipped from Sephiroth's eye at this proclamation, dripping down onto Cloud's cheek. Cloud smiled empathetically, lifting his hands to touch Sephiroth's face. He traced his jawbone, his lips, his eyebrows. He gently rubbed his thumbs across his eyelids, the man closing them down in response. "Sleep, Seph. We'll say goodbye to all of this when we wake."

"Come to bed with me."

"Okay," Cloud replied with a whisper. Sephiroth braced himself on the arm of the couch and stood up, offering his hand to Cloud. The blond took it and was led to Sephiroth's darkened bedroom. Sephiroth pulled him down onto the bed and lay down beside him. Cloud shifted closer over to Sephiroth's warm, waiting body. Strong arms held him for the rest of that night as they both fell asleep without further words or actions. It was the best sleep that either one of them had ever had.

When morning came, they still had not moved.