The point of all of this is he's here not Nathan, My parents or Taylor but Lucas. He's whispering in my ear urging me to keep calm and concentrate on him so that I can get through this. " I have to stop Luke I can't do this it's too hard and it hurts soo bad" I cry as tears and sweat seep into my mouth and mingle. "Shhhh yes you can Hales I know you can do it" He says as he smoothes away the stray hairs stuck to my face.
It's been thirteen excruciating hours and my body is exhausted and I feel as though I'm about to split in two. Doctors , nurses, it seems as if the entire hospital is in the room with us and it's so chaotic that I think I might go insane. "Look at me" he says sensing my anxiety. " Don't worry about them just hold my hand and focus on me" he says glancing down at the doctor below me before continuing "When I say push hold tight and bear down ok?" I shake my head emphatically before he looks back to the doctor for confirmation.
"Alright now take a deep breath and push" he says his voice sure and steady. All of a sudden the room falls silent it's so quiet it seems as if the world is holding their breath. The next thing I hear is the sound of my child's high pitched cry and the doctor telling me "It's a healthy baby..." before I pass out from sheer exhaustion.
When I open my eyes again I'm laying in a riddiculously expensive birthing suite that I know I can't afford. My eyes scan the room before falling upon Nathan's sleeping form on the sofa adjacent to the bed. I can only faintly see the bundled up little person lying on his chest his hands cover everything but the pink cap on our daughter's head.
I wanted a boy and I was positive she was going to be a boy but none of that matters now as I stare at my perfect little family. I feel happy, relieved and when I hear the door open and see Lucas enter conflicted.
A lazy smile spread across his face "how you feeling mom?" he asks as he walks over and takes a seat on the bed next to me. "Like I've been hit by a Mac truck but other than that I'm fine" I say smiling weakly as he places an arm around me and gives me a squeeze. "I'm assuming you'll feel a little more like yourself with time" he assesses with a smirk. "Besides look at what you've got to show for it she's amazing Hales." he says as I follow his gaze to where Nathan and our child lay.
I knew Nate probably went through hell driving across the country from Duke to get here but he didn't make it. I know I may sound bitchy but most of the people who say it's the thought that counts probably didn't almost have a baby alone. If it weren't for Lucas being as overprotective as only he can be I most definitely would've been alone.
I had four weeks before I was due so Nathan and I thought we had plenty of time for him to get back to Tree Hill for Thanksgiving break and our child's birth. I guess the man upstairs had other plans because at 4:15 Tuesday morning while lying in bed I started to cramp up. At first I thought it was a false alarm since I'd had a couple of them recently. I thought that this was just another one until I felt a wet spot directly under me and I turned on the light to see a clear liquid substance dripping from me.
It was a signal that my water had just broken and once I realized that the panic I felt almost paralyzed me. Thank goodness Lucas decided to bodyguard me that night and slept over. I was quiet a few moments embarrassed and afraid until one of strongest contractions I'd ever felt sent me hollering so loudly that he bolted upright.
As soon as he saw the look on my face he grabbed his watch from the bedside table to start timing them. Once he left the bed He swiftly moved around the room going through my drawers grabbing clothes for my hospital stay. All the while he talked to me about old times and made jokes and it not only kept me calm but made me feel safe.
Only now as I watch him watching Nathan and my daughter can I truly appreciate what he's done for me. "So did you name her? or will her name be baby girl Scott he asks" turning his attention back to me. "To be honest I haven't a clue I wasn't expecting a girl and I thought I'd have more time" I say noticing for the first time that he's still in his navy blue and black flannel pajama bottoms that he wore here yesterday.
"Well I think she looks like an angel" he says stealing a glance at her and then back at me. I lean forward to get a better view before he hops off the bed to walk over and gently tap Nathan on the shoulder to wake him. "I think it's time for some mother daughter bonding bro" he says to a tired looking Nathan who promptly sits up to carefully hand him our baby. He smiles sleepily but gratefully at me before turning on his side and getting back to his nap.
"Hi Gigi" I smile as Lucas hands me my daughter "Gigi?" Lucas's questions his brows raised quizzically "Gigi short for Angelina you're right she does look like an angel" I say as I examine her miniature face as it contorts from a yawn into a frown.
She looks like me except for the fact she shares her father and uncle's beautiful blue eyes. It doesn't take long before she is dozing in my arms and I take this opportunity to plant kisses all over her perfect little face. "Have you been formally introduced to uncle Luke?" I say handing her back to him. "We already hung out all last night we had dinner and everything but daddy had to break up the party this morning though didn't he?" He says staring at her adoringly as he held her in his arms before putting her back in the standard glass bassinet the hosptial provided.
"My work here is done for now but I'll be back later to check on you guys ok? he says enveloping me in a hug. Being engulfed in his arms is filling me with a sense of security that I didn't know I needed so badly. "Thanx for everything Luke I don't know what I would've done ... no words can describe how ... " I started and stopped my emotions still raw and fragille. "No need there's nowhere else I'd rather have been "He says pulling away to look into my eyes. "I love you" I whisper in his ear leaning forward our faces now cheek to cheek.
"I love you too" he says leaning back to give me a reassuring smile not realizing I mean "in love" and I can't blame him I'm just realizing myself. I touch his face and stare him dead in the eyes "I... love... you..." I say breathlessly and then I see it when he says" I... said... me ..too..". You would think I'd be happy but the words crush my heart because we both know nothing can come of it. "But you love him too and he gave you this" he says holding up my hand and twisting the wedding band on my finger. "And more importantly he gave you her and in time this will pass" He says pressing my hand against his chest.
Touching my forehead to his "I just wanted you to know" I say softly. Then he kisses me on my temple and this time I feel it.
The End