A quick one-shot. This idea has been covered, I know it has. But never in such a direct to-the-point way. It's been covered poetically, in a long chaptered story, and in other one-shots that get very deep.

But I just wanna have it pop up. Just the CORE of it all.

I own nothing.

The Joker was very, very quiet in his confined cell. Not because he was plotting or brooding or just letting his mind wander. No.. the Joker was as silent as the dead because, while back-tracking on his brief adventurous escape and reunion with the Bat, the Clown Prince of Crime had just had a sudden.. break-through. An.. epiphany as they were called. Right? That's what they were called, right?

Right. So.. What was all this about? Oh yeah..

Dear sweet Christ on high, on psychedelics even!

How had he not seen this fact before? This very obvious fact! It was like.. right under his slightly-crooked nose all the damn time!

In fact, it should've come to full fruition when he and the Dark Knight had had their chat in the interrogation room and he'd told Batman that he completed him.

Or-or even when he'd been telling Bats while hanging upside down from the Prewitt building that they were destined to do this FOREVER.

BUT HE'D NEVER EVEN SEEN THE OBVIOUSNESS IN HIS OWN WORDS!

Joker found himself now curling up his legs on the bed and staring with wide, blank eyes, mouth slightly agape.

He was like that for about.. three hours or so until they came.

Time for his therapy session with Dr. Quinzel.

At first he didn't come when they called. He just continued to stare.

Then, they at least got him to get up so they could shackled his feet and wrists and drag him down the hall and into the elevator.

His face remained the same, though, as if he was just a vegetable right now.

All the way up to Harleen Quinzel's office, the Joker kept the same lost in space look.

If he'd blinked, he must've done it when the guards weren't looking, because his eyes looked wide open the whole trip.

Stopping at Dr. Quinzel's door, the one on the right wrapped on it and waited until the stuttery "Uh- Yes! Yes, please, come in!" came from the other side.

The two gave each other only brief questioning looks before going in and dragging the patient with them.

Harleen was just sitting at her desk, fiercely trying to clean up her bangs and the bun in her hair, but smiled welcomely to the three immediately. Especially her patient.

Until she saw his face..

"Uh.." She watched as they sat him down and quickly backed away, then stared at his face a little longer before up at the two orderlies, "Is.. is he alright? Is he on something right now?" And she pointed directly at him, a bit rudely.

Usually when such a thing was done, he'd bring up a little scowl and mention some quip like "That's not very uh.. lady like, Doc."

But he didn't.

Not even a twitch.

"No, not that we know of.." The one on the left said, and shook his scruffy red head.

The other that knocked on the door lifted his arms in a quick shrug, then let his arms fall and slap his legs.

Sitting back and staring into the Joker's face once again, Harleen realized that this had been the first time she'd LOOKED directly into his eyes and hadn't shivered or had to look away at something else.

"Alright." She picked up her pen to twirl it and nodded, "You may go now. I'll.. see what I can do."

The big burly men gave each other brief glances, then turned and walked out.

Harleen waited a long while after the resounding click of her office door being close was heard. Just sat there and rocked in her chair and twirled her pen and watched him.

Watched the Joker's black eyes.. glistening..

A bit of his cleaned curly hair fall into his face.

He wasn't even licking his lips or prodding at the insides of his cheeks or making popping noises.

And he's so.. so.. beautiful.

It drifted right through one side of Harleen's brain and then passed over to the other side.

"So.." She started, and then halted right after. Her voice had come out very soft and slightly.. husky.

Dr. Quinzel sat up and then leaned into her desk, crossing her arms on top.

"So, Mr. Joker," She started again, and gave only a brief pause this time, before adding, "are you ready for this session?"

When his eyes finally moved to lock onto hers, it felt like someone had shoved their hands through her clothes, through her skin, and tickled all over her insides.

That was much, much more fitting than the stupid butterflies metaphor.

"Hello." She blurted at his attention now given to her.

And then blushed.

And lowered her head.

"I.. I'm sorry, Mr. Joker. I hope you don't think I'm belittling you.. I-I just-"

"I discovered something today.."

"...E-excuse me, Mr. Joker?" She lifted her head again and adjusted her crooked glasses.

He was back when she looked up again; grinning just as wide as always, baring as much teeth as he could to her. She knew it. She knew it wouldn't last long, but..

"I had an.. an epiphany, Dr. Quinzel."

"You had an epiphany?" Harleen couldn't help but make it sound like she didn't believe it. Because she didn't.

Ever since she'd discovered all his childhood memory stories were all just.. stories.. it was hard, very hard, to discern truth from fiction with the Joker.

But, she guessed, that was the point, right?

The big joke of it all.

Sighing loudly, Harleen sat up straight and straightened out her crisp white coat idly as she told him, "Alright, Mr. Joker, tell me about your epiphany."

"Well.. it all began this morning when I woke up from my drug-induced sleep they forced upon me to bring me back."

"Mhmm, that's because if they hadn't, you know you would've tried bating Batman on once again."

"Yeah, yeah. I know, I know I know.." He nodded and licked his lips wildly to make up for lost time, pulling his legs up into the chair.

"So, I started having this epiphany right there in my bed while I uh.. recounted everything that happened the other night."

"Did you remember everything?" Dr. Quinzel asked a bit timidly, but only because she knew he didn't like being interrupted one bit while he was telling stories.

Oh, how he loved to tell stories...

"Yeah, pretty much.. It got a little uhh.. hazy in some parts, but I'm pretty sure that was just from the force of my head getting smashed into walls an' stuff."

Harleen shook her head a little bit, "Probably." She just added. She wasn't looking at him anymore, she was looking down at her notebook and her notes so far, twirling her pen.

"And that's when it all hit me. When the reality of why I keep doing it came into clarity!"

".."It", Mr. Joker?" Harleen once again spoke carefully.

"The bating, the taunting, the idea of Bats being my equal but opposite..." His eyes were going huge now, as if he were just realizing it all once again. "It's all.. it's all just for one reason.."

Harleen felt her heart rate pick up speed and, without noticing, began to lean in, lowering her notebook. Who cared about notes? This was probably the only chance anyone would get to hear the reason for the chaos Joker caused, directly from the beast's mouth himself.

If only for once this session was being recorded.

Joker knew this was a big step.. especially while still in the confines of the asylum.. But it was too late now. It was such a big deal, he HAD to tell someone! And who better than the doctor he was trying to manipulate?

"I..." He couldn't look at Dr. Quinzel, so he looked at the floor.

"I..." He couldn't look at the floor, it was too bland and gloomy, so he tried the ceiling..

"I'm.." It was no use, the ceiling was even worse than the floor, so he closed his eyes and let utter blackness surround his vision.

It helped.

It made him feel all alone..

But who knew who could be lurking in the darkness.

Maybe even Bats himself.

In that case..

"I'm madly in love with the Dark Knight."

Somewhere, in front of him, what sounded like a notebook and pen clattering to the floor reached his ears.

Joker opened his eyes after the whole reality of such a.. a serious truth settled in and (hopefully) became one with said reality.

Only to find his doctor much farther away from her desk than she had been before he'd closed his eyes. Sitting there in her chair, staring right back at him with no masks of kindness, no lies forming on her plump lips as an excuse for his behavior.

Just raw disbelief and shock.

And it. was. beautiful.

Joker's serious expression evaporated into a grin so fierce, he was surprised his scars hadn't ripped anew.

And it was a very smug grin as well.

"Don't worry, doll face, or.. whatever you women like bad boys like me to call you.. I'm sure you won't be the only one disappointed in time."

A quiet wheeze of a harsh laugh tumbled out, and he let it carry out.

This was the best kind of mental torture ever, he realized.

Telling these love-sick bad-boy worshipers the truth.

"I belong to Bats, and he belongs to me!" He crowed as the orderlies came to wrestle him back to his cell.

Please tell me what you think of this. Hate it, love it. Lemme hear it.