Sounds Like Fun!

'Paperwork.' Even the thought of the word made Abarai Renji sick to his stomach. 'You'd think that moving up to a lieutenant's position would mean more fights and less paperwork. My missions did increase in difficulty but all this damn signing! This is the stuff for lower officers!' He let his head fall to the desk, an exasperated sigh escaping his lips.

"What is it now, Abarai?" Renji looked up at the pissed man across from him, watching a bead of sweat role down his cheek.

"It's hot and my hand hurts. Can't we just say the paperwork caught on fire or something?"

"As tempting as that sounds, no." This was one of the rare days in Byakuya Kuchiki's life where he actually showed emotion and spoke out against the monotonous workload. But how could Renji blame him? It was the middle of June and the air conditioning was broken. In fact, most of the Sereitei was feeling the 100+ degree weather. Renji had his own top off and Byakuya also opted for a more dressed way to cool of. His haori, scarf and gloves all sat neatly folded behind him. The noble was loathe to admit that he wanted to tie up his hair like Renji but his kenseikan wouldn't allow it. So he swiped at the sweat before it hit the desk and continued writing.

The redhead picked himself up and started writing again. Soon he began to feel his stomach turn. Not sure if it was the thought of work or the heat, he looked up to his captain. The man glared back with that look that said: If you complain one more time, Abarai, you and Senbonzakura are going to become close friends. He wasn't gonna risk it so he looked down at the words in front of him.

A little more time passed but the churning wasn't stopping. Renji felt like he was gonna burst. 'Shit, if this keeps up, I might pass out, or worse. I might puke in front of him!' He held a hand over his mouth and tried to push out some words. "Taicho, May I-"

"No."

The redhead kept his hand over his mouth as the pressure inside him grew to be unbearable. 'Shit, shit, SHIT!'

!#$%^&*

It was barely heard over his own thoughts but Byakuya lowered his head so that his hair hid his face. His shoulders shook and he clenched his fists on the desk. 'Don't laugh! Whatever you do, don't laugh. You are more mature than that! You are a Kuchiki, the leader of the clan!' His thoughts didn't help him much, not on a day like this one where the heat was messing with his head. First came a snort, then a giggle and that evolved into a fit of laughter. The embarrassed look on his lieutenant's face only fed the humor.

"Geez, Taicho. It's not that funny! I mean I just-"

"Farted. Cut the cheese. Blew the horn. I know, I heard it." The captain bit down on his lip, trying to reign in the laughs. After a moment he had calmed himself back into the normally stoic face he always wore, a hint of humor still in his eyes.

"I mean, with the heat and all and… I ate something bad and-"

"Renji, you don't have to explain. After all, it's perfectly natural."

"GAHH, you sound like a doctor! And what's with the laughing? You never laugh. Is the heat getting to your head?"

"I wonder the same thing." The seriousness with which he said it, paired with the fact that he was blushing and wouldn't meet the redhead's eyes made Renji think something was definitely wrong. He walked over to the other man, surprising the noble with a hand on his forehead.

"I think you have a fever. Do you have a thermometer?"

"T-That won't be necessary, Abarai, thank you though."

"Oh, no you don't. Don't give me any of that, 'I'm fine' bullshit. Now, where is the thermometer?" He stood with his arms crossed and tapped his foot until the noble gave in.

"Right side desk drawer."

"Alright!" He dove for the drawer as his captain leaned in to do the same, their heads hitting each other. Renji fell beneath the desk, absently pulling the other with him. Byakuya opened his eyes to find himself staring into Renji's. But that wasn't the worst of it. He was sitting on Renji's lap and his hands had wound up on the redhead's still bare chest.

"Uh…"

"Taicho, um… could you move your knee?" He looked at the noble's leg to see that the knee in question was not where Renji thought it was. "Oh…. OH!"

Byakuya blushed and tried to get up, to flash out of the room and jump off a bridge. A warm hand grabbed his and pulled him down again, pinning both his hands to the floor.

"Now, now, Taicho. We can't have you running around like this, can we?" He tugged at the clothes on the man beneath him, the cooler air making the noble shiver.

"W-Wait! What are you doing, Renji?"

"Me? Why, I'm just helping out a friend." He lowered his head and sucked at the pale navel, a sharp cry coming from his captain. "Ooh, sensitive, are we, Taicho?"

"R-Renji. I swear if you don't stop right now,-"

"You can worry about that later." He released the other's hands and swooped down to take his captain's entire length into his mouth. Pale hands twisted into his hair and Byakuya wrapped his legs around his lieutenant's back. Renji sucked hard as he tasted the beginnings of release mixed in with sweat.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Both men froze in silence, wishing the intruder away, but to no avail. The door slid open and Ichigo's voice sounded. "Oi, Renji! You in here?"

Byakuya kept a hand over his mouth and glared daggers at the redhead. Renji just smirked and lowered his head to continue sucking. The noble had to keep his head from falling back too far to risk banging it against the desk. His body shook and he knew he wouldn't be able to keep quiet for much longer. The two heard the door close and a moment later, Byakuya was shuddering beneath his lieutenant's forceful mouth. His chest heaved and he barely registered being turned and led out from underneath the desk.

"It's your decision, Taicho. Desk? Floor? Chair?"

"Wh-what?"

"Where do you wanna do it?"

"You-you're kidding, right?"

"Absolutely not, sir." When the noble didn't answer, Renji sat in his captain's chair, pulling the other into his lap. "I've wanted you so badly, for so long. Taicho, will you be my lover?"

Byakuya's mind swirled and he found himself nodding. Renji pulled him into a kiss and wrapped his arms around pale hips, his fingers finding the puckered hole. "AH! Renji, I-"

"Shh. It'll feel good, I promise."

He stretched his captain until the man could no longer take it and then slowly pushed inside. When Byakuya noticeably relaxed he began a slow pace, switching his angle now and then until the noble bit on his shoulder to muffle a loud scream. Renji aimed for the same spot and within minutes released into the shuddering passageway.

"Sorry, Taicho. You're just so damned cute!"

"Byakuya."

"Huh?"

"Please just call me Byakuya."