Disclaimer: I don't own or profit from Harry Potter.

Author Notes: This is my first fanfic in a while; I took a break as I had creative writing classes. Comments on future jobs for Draco would be amazing. Smex scene is on my LJ, username tsukikoelric Enjoy!

Draco Malfoy and the Adventures of Muggle Living:

Chapter One

"This is stupid Harry. Ridiculous. Why are we required to get a Muggle job for Auror Training? And why do we have to take a stupid class like Muggle Living? I won't ever be living like a Muggle!" Draco ranted.

Harry stared at the man next to him. "Draco, if you ever want me to listen seriously, you have to stop pouting, or I'm going to jump you." He chuckled when Draco glared at him. "Baby, what if you ever have to go undercover? Or just fit in with Muggles? You'd never be able to do it without the training." He curled his arm around Draco's shoulders and pulled him closer. "You'll have to interact with Muggles at a job. You'll learn to talk and act like them."

Draco sat up from his place snuggled in the couch corner. "It's still stupid," he huffed before settling into Harry's lap for a kip. Harry snogged him breathless before he could fall asleep.

"Draco, I'm home," Harry called.

"Up here!"

Harry scuffled into the bedroom, work shoes swapped for slippers. "Baby, what's that?"

Draco quirked an eyebrow at Harry's heavy breathing. "Did you run home? Or maybe you were just with your mistress?" He laughed before pulling his boyfriend down for a kiss.

Strangely, Harry resisted. "Mm. Don't distract me. What's with the uniform?"

Draco grinned. "I got a job! I'll be a flying assistant."

"A flight attendant? So why do you have a dress?" He pointed at the dress and vest on a hanger on the door of the wardrobe.

"Oh. It's a lot like a robe isn't it. I hate those trouser things. I don't know why Auror Brenson insisted we wear them when there are these dresses." He rolled his eyes at his Auror teacher.

"Dresses are for girls, honey."

Draco narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "No. My boss told me it was fine. I know you're worried, but I'll be okay. The big, bad Muggle isn't going to take advantage of weak, little pureblood Draco. I'm Lucius Malfoy's son remember? And the dress isn't that short if you're worried about that."

"How about you try it on, and I'll decide for myself." Harry licked his lips.

"Um, yeah, that sounds good." It did sound good, but Harry was looking at him like a cat about to pounce on a mouse, so Draco was skeptical. And a bit frightened. "I'll just be a tick, yeah." He didn't run into the bathroom, but he did walk very quickly.

Later on, after amazing sex while in a dress, Draco broke the news.

"A week, Draco?"

"Yes Harry. It's my job. An experienced flying assistant will be teaching me. I'll be working in 1st class. I don't really know what that means, but I like it. Maybe they'll be old, rich men that'll dote on me." Draco winked.

"Or 1st class criminals."

Draco gasped. "Really? Do I get to use my torture tactics training if they act up?" He looked gleeful.

"No. They're Muggles." Harry's tone was firm.

"Oh fine. I was trying to be a good student and practice, but you have to be Harry Muggle-loving Potter. If I fail my practical, Moody will only have you to blame." Though Moody retired from the field, he was still actively involved in training recruits, specifically Torture Tactics. Draco was his favorite student. "Anyway, I'll be leaving tomorrow afternoon and I'll be back next week. It won't be as long as it seems now." He kissed Harry's chest and settled down to sleep. "And stop scowling. It'll give you wrinkles."

Draco was feeling good. He'd dressed in his uniform and left Harry alternately sulking and drooling. At the airport, people stared as he passed by. It was very amusing. Now, he was on the plane, waiting to board passengers. His stomach was cramped with the idea of "flying" in this Muggle contraption, but he had his wand stuffed in his knee-highs in case of emergency.

Rosa, the experienced woman training him, told him to get ready and put on a smile. The first passengers to enter were those in 1st class.

"Good afternoon. Welcome to- Harry! What are you doing here?" Draco really wanted to stamp his foot, but that would be unprofessional.

"I've always wanted to visit Italy. And I wanted to see you at work." He kissed Draco's cheek then moved to take his seat.

Draco pouted for a few seconds but got back to work soon after. Harry sat in his big, comfy seat, Draco had seen the ones in coach and thought it was barbaric to use seats that small, and watched his boyfriend greet the other passengers. Draco could feel his eyes, mostly on his arse. It was distracting.

After showing everyone how to use the seatbelt and explaining the information on the safety packet, Draco moved to his seat at the front of the cabin. Before he could reach it, Harry snatched him out of the aisle and into his lap.

"Hey baby," Harry muttered in his ear. "All these men are watching you. They think you're a beautiful woman." He gripped Draco's pale thigh, slowly moving up under the skirt.

Draco squirmed, trying to slip out of Harry's grasp. Everyone was watching him. The older man across the aisle from Harry, at least forty, watched raptly and licked his lips.

"Do they know you're mine?" He nipped the sensitive area behind Draco's ear then licked it to soothe the skin.

Draco moaned and shivered from the hot words and breath. "Harry, stop," but as he said it, he ground his arse against Harry's hard prick.

"Mm baby. If you don't stop that, I'm gonna fuck you right here." Harry bit and pulled on his ear lobe. "But you really need to get back to work, huh?" He kissed Draco's temple and pushed him up and out of his lap.

"Harry, you bastard!" he growled. He tried to cover his erection as he moved toward his seat. Before folding down the seat, he grabbed a blanket from the overhead storage; he used it to cover his hard-on after sitting down.

"So you're that kind of flight attendant?" The man with the dry lips, or maybe it was an overactive tongue, leant back in his seat, trying to look inviting, but it was more likely pressure from takeoff.

Draco ground out a smile. "No. I'm not. He's my sodding boyfriend."

The man leered. "Just your boyfriend? If he hasn't proposed to a pretty woman like you, then you have to wonder if he's really into birds. I am definitely into birds though."

"Excuse me! Did you just call me a bird? I am not a wo-"

"Baby, is that man bothering you?" Harry asked. "Why don't you come over here?"

Draco scowled. "No, it's not safe; the seatbelt sign is still on, and it's not time for me to get you refresher mints yet."

"Refreshments," Harry corrected.

"I don't care," Draco turned away from him.

"Relationship not so good?" the man asked.

"Relationship none of your business," Draco mimicked.

"You're a feisty one, sweetie."

Draco ignored him, getting up to get drinks and snacks for his passengers. There were only eight of them, so it didn't take him long. Then he went into the bathroom to get a break from the creep and the boyfriend.

A few sharp knocks sounded through the door.

"Sorry, I'll be out in a bit," Draco forced politeness. "Annoying bastards," he muttered.

The door opened, Draco knew he'd locked it, and Harry entered and shut them both in. "Are you avoiding me, baby?"

The bathroom was tiny, barely big enough for one, let alone tow. Draco was backed into the plastic sink hanging on the wall. "No, I'm not. I'm pissed at you. You came here for what, Harry? To test me, throw me off, mess me up? That's really horrible." His throat was tightening, and he struggled to breathe.

"Hey," Harry cupped his cheeks. "I'm here to support you. That guy harassed you knowing you're with someone. What would it have been like without me here?"

"I can take care of myself. I'm training to be an Auror, remember?" He didn't want to forgive him, but he was a sucker for a pouting, good-intentioned Harry. He reached up and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's neck in a hug.

Harry held his hips. "I'm sorry. I wanted you to have a familiar face supporting you."

Draco hid his smile in Harry's neck. His boyfriend was a sweetheart.

Draco held his face, softening the kiss. He gave Harry a few tender pecks, then pulled away. "Mm. That was a great break." He kissed Harry again. "Unfortunately, it's time to get back to work."

They stepped out of the bathroom to find the 1st class passengers staring at them. Harry went back to his seat, both arrogant and embarrassed. Draco took his fold-down seat.

"I guess I was wrong. Your relationship sounds pretty... good." Then the man had the audacity to wink at him. Like it was a joke or some silly experience they'd shared.

Draco thought about casting a babbling spell on him, which would cause him to spill his deepest, most humiliating secrets, but he only thought of it. Really. And if somehow his subconscious cast the spell without his permission, it would surely wear off in a week or two.

When the plane landed in Italy, Harry gave him a kiss before leaving. The look Rosa gave him was seeped with disappointment.

"I'm sorry. I just don't think this job is for me," Draco told her as they cleaned up.

"I don't think so either, honey," she replied. "Well, it was nice meeting you, and I do hope you find the job that is for you. Also, I'd like to say that's one handsome man you have." She giggled a bit.

Draco smiled and got back to work.

"I'm really glad you quit that job," Harry said after they Apparated home.

"I probably would have been fired if I hadn't. I don't doubt the whole plane heard us fucking."

Harry's grin was fiendish. "You'll find something better."

Draco scoffed. "Of course I will. I'm a Malfoy." He took off his shoes and stuck his feet into a pair of slippers. "What's for dinner?"

"I was thinking Italian." He kissed Draco's forehead.

"Mm. Then let's get cooking."