Hello, everyone. Psychid here again.

If you're a die-hard Yu-Gi-Oh! fan like myself, then I'm pretty sure that you've heard of its newest and most current spin-off series, Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's. And I'm sure that you also know about the series' main feature of the game of Duel Monsters being played on automated motorcycles referred to as "duel runners", right?

Personally, I think that very feature is pretty cool. But there were some people who came to wonder what the purpose of this feature was. Heck, even LittleKuriboh of the ever-so-famous online parody, Yu-Gi-Oh: The Abridged Series, wonders what the purpose of this very feature was!

Unfortunately, even I do not know the purpose of duel runners, or where they even originated. So I thought that in the story you are about to read, I'd show you one possibility, which will hopefully answer both questions! …Or not… =P

As usual, it's time for the 411, pretty much being what this story is about and whatnot. Usually in the 411, I include the story's summary, obviously being what this story is about. But since I pretty much explained it in the introduction, I'll skip that completely. =P However, I will give a disclaimer, like I always do:

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh!, Yu-Gi-Oh! GX, Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's, or any other Yu-Gi-Oh! anime that Kazuki Takahashi—the series' rightful creator—will come up with in his sick little head. And the origin/purpose of the duel runner is not the exact origin/purpose; they are both based upon an educated guess (if that's what you'd like to call it).

Now sit back, relax, and enjoy the story whose title is the most mature, intelligent, and completely original one I could come up with. RER the following story entitled:

CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES!

KaibaCorp – Seto Kaiba's Office – 2:59 P.M.

KaibaCorp: Domino City's most famous and most popular gaming corporation. Here, it is the company's main duty to do whatever it takes to further popularize the game of Duel Monsters, even if it means pushing its limits and creating new technology that would leave most of the game's players in complete curiosity.

Here, we see Mr. Seto Kaiba: the president of KaibaCorp. Here, it is his main duty to manage the company's main duty to do whatever it takes to further popularize the game of Duel Monsters, even if it means pushing its limits and creating new technology that would leave most of the game's players in complete curiosity.

However, on this day, Kaiba just stood beside his desk, looking at his PDA. The current date was May 28, 2010, and the time was two hours, fifty-nine minutes, and fifty-one seconds. It appeared that Kaiba was waiting for something that would soon happen soon, since he was looking very closely at his PDA.

Five… four… three… two… one…! Kaiba thought excitedly to himself. Soon afterwards, the time on his PDA was now exactly three o'clock, and it began to start beeping. In response, Kaiba quickly turned off the PDA's alarm and quickly slid it into his pocket. The background music for Barrett Strong's Money (That's What I Want) began playing from right out of nowhere. The lights in Kaiba's office then dimmed a bit, and he immediately put on a pair of sunglasses he had in his other pocket and started to sing:

"The best things in life aren't free…
but you can keep 'em for the birds and the bees;
now give me money (that's what I want),
that's what I want (that's what I want)!
That's what I wa-a-a-ant (that's what I want), yeah,
that's what I want!"

Suddenly, Kaiba was immediately cut off by a buzzing sound coming from the voice box on his desk, and the lights in his office went back on. Kaiba slowly put his sunglasses back in his pocket, and he slowly headed back to his desk and pressed a button on the voice box. "Hello…" he calmly said. "I wasn't doing anything silly, if that's what you're thinking…"

"Mr. Kaiba, we know that it's three o'clock on a Friday, and we know it's the same time you do that silly 'money' dance of yours," a female voice came out from the box.

"Oh…" said Kaiba. He cleared his throat and continued, "What do you want?"

"Your younger brother, Mokuba, is here to see you," answered the female voice.

"Probably here to compliment me on how rich, famous, and just plain awesome I am," Kaiba chuckled to himself. He pressed the button on the voice box and announced, "Send him in."

Soon after Kaiba ended his little conversation, the automatic doors to his office slid open, and in ran Mokuba. He was a boy whose height was half of Kaiba's, and he had black hair and violet-colored eyes, and he wore a yellow jacket over a light-and-dark-blue-striped, long-sleeved shirt, black jeans, and white sneakers. "Big brother! Big brother! You've got to hear this!" he cried as he ran towards him. He also appeared to have a panicked expression on his face as he said this.

"Here to compliment about how rich, famous, and just plain awesome I am, eh bro?" Kaiba chuckled to himself, sitting down in his seat and placing his crossed fingers upon his desk. "Alright, let's get this done and over with."

"But Seto!" cried Mokuba. "It's something different!"

"Different, you say?" questioned Kaiba, his fingers still crossed. "What do you mean by that?"

"Um… I kind of have some bad news to tell you…" said an uneasy Mokuba, scratching the back of his head.

"What kind of bad news do you mean?" asked Kaiba.

"Well… um…" groaned Mokuba, still scratching his head. "Um… uh… well… Just promise me that you won't flip out after what I've told you, okay?"

"Mokuba, Mokuba, Mokuba," Kaiba comforted his brother, and gently placing a hand on his shoulder. "I am your brother. And as a brother, it is my sworn duty to protect, support, and love you, no matter what. It doesn't matter if you are bullied like you always are, kidnapped on an average daily basis like you always are, or just having you being senselessly bashed in most fan fictions such as this like you always are, I will always be there for you. And that goes the same for whatever bad news you have to present to me: no matter how bad they are, I will still love you no matter what.

"Now, what are these so-called 'bad news' you have to tell me?"

"Well, um… there's this one company that's become more popular yours, and-" began Mokuba.

With that said, Kaiba's eyes immediately popped open wide, and he now had a shocked expression on his face. It took a while for the following sentence to break out of his mouth: "Say that again…"

"There's a company… that's become more popular than yours…?" a now slightly frightened Mokuba slowly repeated.

Kaiba's shocked expression still covered his face. Only this time, he remained silent for a while—more silent than ever before.

"Seto… are you okay?" asked Mokuba, waving a hand in front of Kaiba's face. Kaiba still remained silent and still, still shocked by the news he has just heard.

After a few seconds, Kaiba started to twitch all over. Then, he felt a sudden rush of anger inside him. After that, his expression slowly changed from shocked and stunned to enraged and furious. In response, Kaiba screamed a high-pitched, ear-piercing cry as he then began to destroy everything in his office. He didn't care what he destroyed or what he was destroying them with: he was in a complete fit of rage.

Fortunately for Mokuba, he had seen him act this way whenever he was in a crisis like this before, and he knew what to do. But he had to do what he had to do; and fast.

"Seto, your pills!" he ran towards his older brother, waving a plastic bottle of his medications in his hand. Kaiba quickly swiped the bottle out of his younger brother's hand, and quickly ingested two of the pills. After he swallowed them, he immediately calmed down and began panting heavily, with sweat now on his face.

"I'm… I'm sorry Mokuba…" groaned Kaiba, still panting. "I just cannot believe that there's a company that more popular than mine… No company can possibly be more popular than mine!

"Tell me, brother… which company is foolish enough to try and be more popular than mine? It's not Schroeder Corp, is it? Please tell me it's not that dreaded company!"

"Actually, it's a different company," informed Mokuba.

"What kind of 'different company'? Tell me!" Kaiba demanded.

"It's that motorcycle company that's not too far from here," responded Mokuba, pointing to a motorcycle retail store outside of the KaibaCorp building.

"WHAT?" screamed Kaiba, pressing his face against the window glass. "Are you kidding me? A motorcycle company is more popular than a children's card game company like mine? How is this even possible?"

"Well, there have been these commercials lately…" answered Mokuba, logging on to Kaiba's computer—the only thing Kaiba didn't destroy during his fit of rage. As soon as he got on DuelTube-dot-com, he began searching for the commercial he had mentioned earlier. It took some time for the video to buffer once it was found, but it managed to load.

And this is what the commercial was:

On the commercial, there was a little boy staring at his Duel Monsters cards, with an expression of boredom crossing his face. He appeared as if he had nothing better to do.

"Hey, Billy!" said a random male announcer guy coming from out of nowhere. "What seems to be the problem?"

"Hi, random male announcer guy coming from out of nowhere," sighed the boy named Billy. "I have nothing fun to do. And all I have are these children's trading cards, to which it's the only thing I spend all my money on…"

"Well then, Billy," continued the announcer guy, "what you need is… a motorcycle!"

"A motorcycle?" wondered Billy. "What's that?"

"Why, Billy!" chuckled the announcer guy. "A motorcycle is what can excite peoples' lives far more than ordinary pieces of paper, namely children's trading cards! A motorcycle provides action in your life! Adventure! Thrills! And much, much more!"

"Wow!" said an amazed Billy. "Motorcycles sound like fun!"

"Indeed, they do!" the announcer guy chuckled once again. "But don't take my word for it: just ask these people, who have experienced the action and excitement of… a motorcycle!"

"Thanks to motorcycles, I can now go to my college classes faster than ever!" said a stereotypical punk college girl, riding her own motorcycle to her college campus.

"Thanks to motorcycles, I can now pick up the chicks easier than before!" said a stereotypical beach hunk, riding his own motorcycle and carrying a stereotypical beach babe upon his shoulders.

"Thanks to motorcycles, kidnapping helpless and defenseless children are even more fun than ever! Just watch!" said a stereotypical male biker punk. Using his own motorcycle, he rode up towards an innocent male child licking a sucker. As soon as he came up to the boy, he immediately punched him in the stomach, carried him upon his shoulders, and rode off, laughing maniacally.

"So, what are you waiting for, folks?" asked the random announcer guy. "Do something useful and get yourself a motorcycle… today!"

From there, the commercial ended.

"I don't believe it!" exclaimed an offended Kaiba. "How could anyone possibly fall for a commercial like that?"

"Well, they do seem to be good at stretching the truth…" observed Mokuba, rubbing his chin.

"Impossible!" shouted Kaiba. "Nobody is better at stretching the truth than I am!

"That settles it: something must be done!"

"What are we going to do, bro?" asked Mokuba.

"As far as I know, there's only one thing we can do, Mokuba," Kaiba silently declared, squinting his eyes. "We'll have to fight fire with fire… or should I say, motorcycles with motorcycles…"

Mokuba, who suddenly knew what Kaiba was talking about, opened his eyes wide in shock. "But Seto!" Mokuba warned. "It's too dangerous! If you do something like that, it could result in a crappy spin-off series that will leave everyone confused!"

"I'm aware of that, Mokuba," Kaiba calmly responded. "But I'm afraid that it's a risk we'll have to take!

"Come, Mokuba!"

And so, Kaiba walked out his office to his secret laboratory, with Mokuba willingly following behind.

KaibaCorp – Inventions Creating and Testing Laboratory – 3:35 P.M.

"And that is why I need you all to help create a duel system like that," Kaiba finished his presentation to the team of employees that worked at KaibaCorp's inventions creating and testing laboratory.

"Are you sure you want to do this, Mr. Kaiba?" asked the head of the team. "The result of your request could be the creation of a crappy spin-off series that will, indeed, leave everyone confused!"

"Hey, that's what I said!" exclaimed Mokuba.

"Shut up, Mokuba," Kaiba snapped at his brother. He turned to the head of the team and responded, "I don't care if a so-called 'crappy spin-off series' will be created in response; I'll do whatever it takes for this company to regain its popularity!

"So let's do it, already!"

"Y-y-yes sir, Mr. Kaiba!" obeyed the head of the team, quickly saluting him. He knew better than to disobey one of his boss's requests, even it was one that could end up with disastrous results. He turned to the rest of his team and motioned them to get to work on whatever Kaiba had ordered them to create.

Two weeks later…

"Mr. Kaiba… we're ready…" said the head of the team, after two long weeks of creating, implementing, and testing whatever Kaiba ordered them to create.

"It's about time!" snapped Kaiba, with his younger brother beside him. "So let's see it, already!"

"Please, follow me," said the head of the team, motioning Kaiba to follow him. Mokuba—being Mokuba—willingly followed alongside his brother. After about a minute or two, everyone came across some kind of object that was covered in a gray tarp.

"Mr. Seto Kaiba," announced the head of the team, walking over to the object as a drum roll was heard from out of nowhere, "I would like to be the first to present to you what may change the game of Duel Monsters forever as we know it! Behold… the duel runner!"

With that said, the head of the team immediately pulled off the tarp, and there stood what appeared to be a shiny, light-grey-colored motorcycle. But it wasn't just any motorcycle, you see; it had a Battle City Finals duel disk installed somewhere in the inside front.

"It's… it's… it's beautiful!" gasped Kaiba in amazement; a tear rolled down his right cheek.

"Yes, it is… very beautiful, indeed…" replied the head of the team, feeling a little uneasy. "And it isn't just good in terms of appearance; it has excellent performance, as well! We've tried many tests with this thing, all of them being successful!

"Um… Mr. Kaiba? Wh-where are you going?"

He noticed that Kaiba was heading over towards the experimental duel runner. He climbed upon the runner, put on a nearby helmet, and started up the runner's engines. "I want to see how well this baby performs for myself!

"Set up a duel simulation system so I can see how well this thing really is!"

Still wise enough not to argue, the head of the team ordered the rest of his team to set up a duel simulation system so that Kaiba could test out the duel runner for himself. Yes, we are all about to see the very first duel performed on the very first duel runner ever created. Indeed, this very duel would mark history in the game of Duel Monsters, and would revolutionize the game of Duel Monsters forever as we all knew it.

Unfortunately, this story wasn't intended to be duel-related; so let's just move on, shall we?

One filler skip later…

After the filler duel had been both completed and skipped, everyone in the room began applauding for Kaiba.

"Mr. Kaiba, you've done it!" beamed the head of the team. "You've won the very first card game on a duel runner!"

"And man, that card game was just plain exciting!" added a random employee of Kaiba's team.

"I would have to be an idiot to miss something like that!" added another.

"Yes, that card game was pretty epic…" sighed Kaiba. "Alas, something doesn't feel quite right…"

"What do you mean, Mr. Kaiba?" asked the head of the team.

"That card game following the same gameplay, but on a motorcycle, seems rather… dull…" explained Kaiba. "I'm afraid we'll have to… spice things up, if you know what I mean…"

"And how are we supposed to do that, sir?" asked the head of the team.

"Just leave everything to me," answered Kaiba. He turned to the rest of the team and ordered them, "Go fire up the Blue-Eyes jet. I'm going to make a little arrangement with… a colleague…"

Maximillion Pegasus's Mansion – 5:40 P.M.

Our story now takes place at the private palace of Maximillion Pegasus: the very same former antagonist who stole Yugi Muto's grandfather's soul from a TV set, arranged a pointless dueling tournament just because he wanted Yami's ancient Millennium Puzzle, and suddenly became a good guy for some reason some time after his sorry butt was kicked by Yami in a children's card game. He is now the president of Industrial Illusions: the same company that created the children's trading cards to further popularize the game of Duel Monsters.

At this moment, he was listening to a Spice Girls CD album on his stereo, being the Spice Girls fan that he is (at least envisioned by LittleKuriboh, anyway).

"They were such a good girl group…" sighed Pegasus, a tear streaming down his right cheek. "Why did they have to split up…? Why, I ask you?"

Suddenly, a buzzer coming from the voice box on the desk beside Pegasus went off. In response, Pegasus immediately turned off his stereo and answered the voice box. "Yes?" he answered.

"Mr. Seto Kaiba is here to see you," answered a male voice coming from the voice box.

"Ooh, so Kaiba-boy decided to pay a little visit to Peggy…" Pegasus said mischievously to himself, rubbing his hands together. He pressed a button on his voice box and responded, "Oh, do send him in!"

With that, Pegasus's door immediately swung open, and in stormed Kaiba with the usual frown crossing his face, carrying a silver briefcase in his right hand. "Ah, dear Kaiba-Boy!" Pegasus greeted him with glee, not realizing nor caring about Kaiba's frowning facial expression. "Oh, how may I be of service?"

"I'm not here to play, old man," Kaiba grumbled, slamming the briefcase down on Pegasus's desk. "Listen, I can't believe I'm saying this, but… I need your help…"

"Oh, I would be more than glad to help someone like you, Kaiba-Boy!" chuckled Pegasus, still with glee. "What exactly do you need help with, anyway?"

"My company's in a crisis at this point," explained Kaiba. "And so, in attempts to get out of that crisis, I've come up… with this…" Kaiba opened up his briefcase, took out the blueprints to the duel runner, and handed them to Pegasus.

Pegasus looked over the blueprints very carefully. "Hmm… very interesting, indeed…" observed Pegasus, nodding to himself, "…but also, very dangerous, since it could result in a crappy spin-off series being made…"

"I'm well aware of that…" Kaiba said darkly through his gritted teeth.

"I don't blame you; you always were one to surpass your limits in times like this, Kaiba-Boy…" Pegasus chuckled once again.

"Please, stop calling me 'Kaiba-Boy'…" Kaiba grumbled once more.

"I cannot help myself; it's a habit that is hard to break," explained Pegasus. He cleared his throat and continued, "Anyway, just what exactly do you want me to do?"

"I feel as if card games being played on these motorcycles—to which they go by the same gameplay—seems rather dull after a while," explained Kaiba. "That's why I want you to come up with something that will make card games on motorcycles exciting!"

"Are you sure you want me to do this?" warned Pegasus. "Because it-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Kaiba mocked him, "it could 'result in a crappy spin-off series being made'. Will you just help me, already?"

"Y…yes, sir," Pegasus reluctantly agreed. "But I assure you, it will take some time-"

"I'll give you half an hour," ordered Kaiba, walking out of Pegasus's office to wait. With the slam of the door, Pegasus immediately went to work, knowing better than to slack off on an urgent job such as this.

One half hour later…

After half an hour had indeed passed, Pegasus slowly opened the door. "Kaiba-Bo-" he began; Kaiba sneered at him, as if he knew what he was about to call him. "I mean, uh… Mr. Kaiba…" Pegasus then corrected himself, "I have completed your task-"

"Excellent!" Kaiba cackled running into the room. "So, what did you come up with?"

"Behold," presented Pegasus, holding up a card towards Kaiba. It was a Field Spell Card to which its artwork appeared to be some kind of racetrack shrouded by a burst of light-purple-colored energy, "the card I would like to call… 'Speed World'!"

Kaiba took the card, and carefully observed it. "This is rather… interesting…" Kaiba observed, nodding his head and holding his chin at the same time. "This is very interesting, indeed!"

"Oh, I just knew you'd enjoy it," boasted Pegasus.

"Thanks; now goodbye," Kaiba quickly and flatly gave Pegasus a farewell.

"Wait; that's it?" asked a shocked Pegasus. "Are you sure you don't want to stay here just a little longer?"

For a few seconds Kaiba remained silent. Then, he quickly answered, "No." He walked out of his office, quickly shutting the door behind him.

And now, for a rather quick scene change.

Domino City – Central City – 8:20 P.M.

After the rather quick scene change, we are now at the heart of Domino City, where a large crowd was in front of the KaibaCorp building. Those who were among the crowd were invited to the presentation of a new duel system, and they were anxious to find out what it was.

And two of the many people among the crowd included the King of Games himself, Yugi Muto. Yes, I know what you're all thinking; since I have just mentioned Yugi, the sentence should actually read that one of the many people among the crowd, right? Well, besides him, one other known character was there, as well: Yugi's partner-in-crime, Yami Yugi.

At this moment, both of them were discussing a general topic while they waited for this "presentation" to commence.

"You know, other me," Yugi brought up a subject, "I've been meaning to ask you this for quite some time now…"

"Ask away, Yugi!" Yami happily responded. "I'm sure that whatever you're about to ask me, I'll be able to answer it!"

"Why is it that you do have to take over my body during my duels, and user your magical powers to cheat and win?" asked Yugi.

"Um… uh… you see, uh…" Yami tried to think of a good answer.

"I'm waiting…" said Yugi, growing impatient.

"It's because… uh… that's the way things roll?" answered Yami as best as he could.

Then, there was silence.

"That's the best reason you could come up with?" asked an annoyed Yugi. "'That's the way things roll'?"

"You don't understand-" began Yami.

"God, that's got to be the lamest excuse I've ever heard in my life!" groaned Yugi, rolling his eyes.

"What I'm trying to say is-" began Yami.

"No wonder Katie Tiedrich hates our show so much!" Yugi interrupted once again.

"Yugi, you really should know that-"

Before Yami could continue, some fanfare music began playing from out of nowhere, and the face of Kaiba appeared on a large television screen standing before the audience. "Greetings, fellow citizens of Domino City!" Kaiba bellowed. "I'll bet you're all wondering why you are here at this moment."

Silence.

"Well, I'm glad you are!" continued Kaiba, ignoring the silence. "It's because I am here to present to you what will forever change the ways of Duel Monsters as we know it!

"For I, President Seto Kaiba, am to present to you: the one… the only… the DUEL RUNNER!"

With that, a shiny, red duel runner suddenly lifted up from under the floor. Everyone gasped in awe at the very sight of the thing.

"Half motorcycle, half duel system," resumed Kaiba, "this baby is the main focus for an all-new kind of duel known as a turbo duel! And if you think that a turbo duel's game rules are the same as the duels played on land, well think again!

"In a turbo duel, the all-new Field Spell Card, Speed World, will be in play; with it in play, no Spell Cards—other than ones that include 'Speed Spell' in their names—can be activated; not ever! And Speed Spell cards require a certain amount of Speed Counters on one's Speed World to be activated!

"And you're probably wondering what Speed Counters are, aren't you?"

More silence.

"Good!" resumed Kaiba, ignoring the silence once again. "During each Standby Phase to which Speed World is in play, each player gains one Speed Counter, but a player can have no more than twelve Speed Counters at the most! Speed Counters are highly important in turbo duels; they not only determine a duelist's speed, but they also determine a duelist's strength in the duel itself! But be warned: for every increment of one thousand points of damage you take from a single source—whether it's from a battle or an effect—one of your Speed Counters will immediately go down the tubes!

"So do something useful… and get a duel runner… TODAY!"

With that, the presentation ended, and it left everyone in more awe than ever before. There were comments such as "Outstanding!" and "How marvelous!" and all other comments like that.

"Humph… and you said it was the stupidest thing to come out of Tristan's mouth!" mocked Yami.

"Shut up, other me who has to take over my body for no apparent reason and cheat to win," snapped Yugi.

Now, we go to another scene change… and a time change, as well!

Twenty-five years later…

Twenty-five years later, we now see Neo Domino City: a highly advanced version of the original Domino City, in terms of technological advancement. This city is one of the main places for the all-new Yu-Gi-Oh! spin-off series, Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's (a.k.a. the "crappy spin-off series").

Here, we see whoever succeeded Seto Kaiba as president of KaibaCorp, staring down arrogantly from his tower. As he was doing this, one of the new Kaiba's assistants rushed in. "Mr. Kaiba! Mr. Kaiba!" he called out.

"What is it now?" asked the new Kaiba.

"I'm afraid that our company is the second most popular company in the city!" explained the assistant.

"WHAT?" asked the shocked new Kaiba. "How is this possible? Ever since the invention of the duel runner, this company has been the most popular company for years!

"What's the company that's more popular than ours?"

"Apparently, it's that skateboard company down the street," answered the assistant, pointing to a skateboard retail not far from KaibaCorp.

"GASP!" gasped the new Kaiba in astonishment. And here, the madness began.

THE END

Yeah, like most of my other stories, this one probably wasn't my best one yet. But hey, I tried, right?

Also, to all die-hard 5D's fans, I didn't mean to sound offensive (mainly with the "crappy spin-off series" joke), nor do I want to misrepresent myself. I am a massive 5D's fan; and of all the Yu-Gi-Oh! series released so far, 5D's has got to be the best one yet, despite its filler arcs, namely the Crashtown arc (seriously, what was the purpose of that, huh?).

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed it! And I hope you enjoy what's yet to come! =D