Title: A Night Under the Big Top

Summary: Mac surprises Stella with an invitation to the circus and by the time the evening is over, more than friendship is growing. SMACKED one-shot. Based on the Eppy 1.14 Blood, Sweat & Tears.

Disclaimer: I don't own Mac Taylor but I wish I did (course then I'd have no time for writing)! You know the rest write?

A/N: Okay so now that the season is over it's time for reruns either on TV or DVD. So during the summer I am going to go back to find my fave eppies and try to write a few one shots around them if I haven't already. So starting with season one, I loved this eppy and hope you all like this one shot. And if any follow none are in any particular order and follow no pattern unless stated (such as my 4 continued that were linked in season 6). Hope that's not confusing! Enjoy!

'You gotta admit Mac, being this close is pretty cool,' Stella had told me a few hours earlier as she was standing face to face with a rather large elephant; a grin of childish enthusiasm adorning her beautiful face. For a few brief moments she had seemed lost in time; her eyes sparkled, her posture was loose and carefree and her words full of hope and delight.

I could only grunt a lame response in return; work related of course, much to her dismay and she never brought it up again. She had looked to me with some expectation; her eyes begging me to share in her joy but I didn't and now I feel as though I have let her down in some way.

Personally I didn't see the draw; the circus? Wasn't really my thing, I wasn't a big fan of all the extravagance, noise or fanfare but part of me now wishes I had spent a few extra minutes urging her to continue with her happy thoughts; or even making up some kind of excuse to show my interest in something that she obviously enjoys.

Even now I give my head a shake, trying to erase the image of her look of disappointment followed by a fake smile that I knew she plastered on her face to humor me as I quickly got back to business and we started to look for the missing costume.

"Damn it," I softly curse as I look out the window. The weather is cool and turning more dreary and the run I had planned in my mind doesn't seem so inviting in the cool rain. I look at the circus flyer before me and frown; something that I had casually stuffed into my coat pocket when we first entered the large arena.

"The circus...Stella should go..." I mumble to myself as I see her walk past my office. She tosses me a casual look and I have to wonder if her now cool attitude is due to work or the fact that I had a golden opportunity to expand our friendship but didn't take advantage of it.

You should go with her, my brain suggests. "The circus..." I ponder as my eyes examine the flyer once again. "I have no reason not go to..." I try to convince myself. Just let loose and have some fun.

"I went to the dog show with her and we had a good time...could happen again," I ponder as my eyes fix on the flyer, my brain urging me with each passing second.

I finally settle in my mind that I am going to take her to the circus and hopefully cement a break in our bond that I will not allow to get any bigger; especially if I was the one that created it. Being a friend with someone means sometimes pushing aside our own internal discomfort and putting someone else's comfort ahead of our own.

I take a deep breath and then go in search of Stella, feeling the knot around my neck starting to tighten as I near her office. I round the corner and feel my anxiety starting to grow, my mind almost wanting to chicken out and say that Stella will get over it, you dont need to put yourself out for something you dont really want to do.

"Busy?" I ask in haste, wanting to quite the nagging doubts inside my head; doubts that will force me to walk away and leave this thought of us going to the circus as just that, a thought and nothing more.

"Just finishing up," Stella tells me as she slowly closes her file. "What did you need?"

"Are those extra crime scene photos's?" I ask as she quickly stuffs some odd looking pictures into the file.

"No they are just...extra," Stella replies as she pulls one out and hands it to me with some hesitation.

I look at the picture of the elephant with a slight frown and then up at her for an explanation.

"Anasuya gave them to me. She said that her and Lukas always stole away in the elephant pen and knew my enthusiasm for the large animal and so gave me a few. Do you want one?"

"Um..."

"It's okay Mac, no one has to know you have a fondness for elephants," she teases as she snatches the picture back.

"I don't mind them."

"Really?" She arches a skeptical brow. "Didn't seem too fond of them today when you could actually touch one."

"Had work on my mind."

"Of course," she offers me a kind smile. A smile like that from any other person on this planet would have been misconstrued as patronizing; a putdown of sorts. But I know she offers it in sympathy. I always think about work; even when I have the opportunity to allow my mind to wander to something else that brings me joy.

"Stella..." I start with a heavy sigh.

"Mac, I know you and you don't have to justify yourself to me. I just wanted you to share some joy at that moment."

"Do I get a second chance?"

"Hmm didn't know you were a firm believer in second chances," she states and I feel my stomach tighten.

"In this case I am."

"Well I hate to inform you Mac but the only animals we have in this office space are in the freezer," she quips and my face finally softens.

"Well how about we go down to the Circus and see if you can help me experience that joy for myself?"

"Really?" Stella asks with a grin that grows instantly.

"I feel like I short changed you in some way this morning."

"Mac you don't owe me anything."

"Right. Okay so that's not what I meant. I am sorry for dampening your mood this morning but I am serious about wanting to experience a bit of that for myself."

She looks at me with some skepticism. So I quickly pull the flyer from my pocket and show it to her. "Max said we could get in at no charge for helping solve Lukas's murder."

"You want to go to the Circus?"

"I do."

"With me?"

"Only with you."

"This time dinner is on me," she tells me in haste.

"Stella all they have there is hot dogs," I deadpan, referring to her comment a few weeks ago about when I offered to take her to dinner and then ended up paying for hotdogs only.

"Then you should enjoy your meal."

"I'm sure I will. Want to change first?"

"I don't know Mac. At the dog show you left the tie behind. You in a pair of jeans might send me into therapy," she teases and my face warms. "But I think that would be in order. Pick me up at seven."

"Seven it is."

I leave her office and for some odd reason, a new feeling of elation is starting to cover me. But as I enter my office my anxiety starts to build. I'm glad I asked her but now what? At the dog show we had a friendly wager so that kept my social awkwardness at bay a little. There is nothing to bet on where we are going tonight. What will I talk about? Oh maybe this wasn't a good idea.

"See you in a bit Mac; I'm going home to get ready. Thank you again," Stella's warm, eager voice fills the quiet void in my office and my mind sinks. Now I have to go; I can't let her down. I'd never forgive myself. I offer her a tight smile and watch her leave, leaning back in my chair and stare at the space where she was standing. What do you even wear to the circus?

My mind is still fretting about this outing as I let myself into my quiet apartment; allowing the stifling silence to greet me as it does every night. I slowly wander into my bedroom and start to shed my work attire, tugging the knot of the tie and tossing it to the bed before my suit jacket follows.

"This is ridiculous," I scold myself as I stand before my closet, fretting about what to wear. Oh if only my team knew the real me; able to look any ferocious criminal in the eye straight on, but unable to pick out something to wear to a family venue.

I finally decide on dark jeans and a casual sweater; hoping that Stella doesn't dress up too much as that way I won't feel too out of place. The dog show was easy because it was right after work and all I did was shed my tie, no time to really think about where I was going. But I know I enjoyed that night so much that I had told myself that I would do it again. To be honest, I didn't expect that to be tonight; to be this soon.

"Mac..." I allow my name to escape my lips with a heavy sigh as I head into the bathroom to make sure I look presentable, apply a modest amount of cologne and then head for the door, grabbing my leather jacket before I head for the street.

The cab ride to Stella's does little to calm my anxiety and I'm once again wondering what we'll talk about during the breaks or intermission. But Stella is never at a loss for words and always excuses my social ineptness; never making me feel like I have said or done something wrong. I do that on my own well enough.

I approach her front door with a racing heart and then knock.

"Hold on a sec!" She calls out and my lips can't help but start to tug upward. That smile only grows as she opens the door and greets me with a big grin; her enthusiasm boundless.

"Just let me get my coat," she tells me; her exuberance now starting to cover me with heavy arms, wrapping around me that I am actually thinking she's going to delay us. Thankfully she's dressed down; I mean if that's possible. Dark jeans, a figure hugging sweater and perfume that actually makes me long to get close to a woman once again.

"You look great," I state with hesitation and she offers me a shyer smile. Did I make her blush? No, not possible. This is Stella, my best friend; I don't have that kind of effect on her. But the longer I stare at her perfect body before she wraps the coat around it; closing her frame away from my prying eyes, I faster I start to realize that I wasn't looking at her with platonic eyes; it was more. More than friendship.

"You dress down very nicely also Mac," she commends and my heart rate starts to come down a little.

"Will you need therapy?"

"Hmm I think I could handle seeing you a few more times like this," she tells me warmly.

"A few more?"

"If that's okay."

"Sure," I states with uncertainty and she just giggles. We get into the elevator; our conversation based around the flyer and what other acts we'll be seeing tonight.

"You know for a moment I thought you were going to bail," Stella softly admits and I look at her in wonder.

"In truth for a moment I thought I was going to also."

"Was it me?" Stella wonders.

"No it was me," I tell her in truth. "Just wasn't sure I would be good company. I mean it being the circus and all...not that I didn't think I would..."

"Mac, just relax."

"I'm glad I didn't bail," I finally admit.

"Well I'm glad you didn't either. You know this could become a regular thing for you."

"Asking you out?" I blurt out in haste and her smile widens.

"Well that too, but I was referring to you having a regular life. Should be careful Mac, we might think you human afterall."

"Touche," I quip and she pokes my side, forcing a small chuckle from my lips.

"But I wouldn't mind you asking me out again," she states in a low tone; prompting me to look at her in surprise. "Just so you know."

"Good to know."

"And if I were to ask you out?"

"Do you want to ask me out?"

"Yes."

"Where to?" I wonder.

"Nice try Mac. You surprised me and now it's my turn to surprise you."

"Fair enough," I reply as the cab finally comes to a halt outside the entrance to the fairgrounds. We both get out and after I have paid the cab fair, Stella playfully loops her arm in mine, nearly dragging me toward the entrance, unable to enter the raucous arena fast enough. With her body pressed up against mine, my heart starts to race and an odd feeling of happiness and contentment start to settle upon me; feelings I haven't felt in years; feelings I hope I feel again. Whatever happens tonight, I know that tomorrow things will be different and that is unnerving and comforting at the same time. Yes I want to ask you out she had told me. Friends don't date. Are we now more than friends?

XXXXXXXX

From the moment that Mac shot down my brief moment of happiness inside the tent this morning when we were still working the scene, I never imagined him doing something like this; something so personal and spontaneous. I knew he felt guilty when he first walked into my office with that flyer; he had it written all over his handsome face. And even if it was guilt that motivated this outing, the point is that he chose to listen to his heart instead of his head and here we are.

The discussion in the cab surprised even me; are we dating? No this is just a friendly outing between two best friends, I try to remind myself. But after he said he'd like to ask me out again, I had to play the game; upping the stakes so that we were on even playing field. In truth, I had nothing in mind for a surprise outing but since he actually seemed game, my brain is now wanting to think of a place to take him to. Something that would bring him as much joy as this does for me.

I feel his body slightly stiffen as we enter the opening arena; Max Niemen; father of the deceased, coming toward us with open arms.

"Detective's," he greets loudly as he clasps both our shoulders with each hand. "Welcome. Thank you for taking me up on my offer."

"Thank you for making the offer. We are both looking forward to tonight."

"Well feel free to wander anywhere you want; just give my name if you run into trouble."

"Thank you we will," Mac offers with a nervous smile.

"I want to show Mac the elephant."

"Oh she is waiting for you both," Max tells us with a twinkle in his eye. "Please follow me. I take you there personally."

I watch Mac's eyes starting to dart nervously around; probably wondering if he'll run into anyone and have to justify himself for actually putting work second and something fun first.

"You know it won't happen right?"

"What won't?" Mac asks, looking at me with wondering glance, a hint of uncertainty in his warm blue eyes.

"The person you are expecting to run into and then you'll have to justify yourself to by being here. It's just us Mac."

"Have I ever told you how unnerving it is how well you know me?" He counters and I just laugh.

"I like the word comforting better," I counter in return. "Even if you did Mac, you are entitled to some downtime and you aren't doing anything wrong or something that no one has seen before."

"I know you are right and I'm sorry if I seem...well stiff."

"When was the last time you were at the Circus? I mean as just a regular spectator?"

"With or without my parents?" Mac retorts and it's my turn to laugh as I squeeze his arm.

"Then we'll both enjoy this together."

We reach the tent where the female elephant is being groomed and I once again feel Mac tense in my grasp.

"Just try to relax Mac."

"Can you clear my head of visions of a sudden stampede," he frowns and I just shake my head.

"For once think of something good."

"Force of habit."

"Hmm one more habit I'll have to break you of."

"One more?" He shoots me the famous Mac Taylor, arched brow, skeptical stare. "What is another habit you think you need to break me of?"

"Doubting my ability to actually do that," I counter and he just shakes his head, offering me a wry grin as we stand face to face with the elephant. Since I had touched it earlier, this time I take Mac's hand in mine and slowly raise it to the large animal.

Mac's hand flinches under mine, but he doesn't pull back, only looks at me with a shy sideways glance but nods for me to continue. The warmth his skin is generating on mine is surprising; what is the effect Mac's simple touch is having on me? I finally bring his hand to rest upon the trunk of the large beast, and his lips produce a small chuckle when the truck curls and the end snout starts to inspect the foreign objects touching it.

The elephant jerks for a few minutes but doesn't seem to mind us touching her; she's used to human contact. For some reason it's the humans who seem more afraid of personal touch than the beast does.

"Well?" I ask Mac with a soft whisper; our fingers still latched together and the left side of my body warmer than the right.

"Really is cool to be this close," he states with a hint of uncertainty; once again probably surprised that he's enjoying himself so much doing something so simple. "She has no fear."

"She has nothing to fear from us Mac," I state as I look at the elephant with a slight frown; my own mind now racing. I feel Mac's free hand gently tuck a curl behind my ear, prompting me to look at him in wonder.

"Funny how despite man having an advanced brain, the animals have figured it out way before us."

"Funny," I repeat without laughing. "And why is that?"

"Fear of rejection," Mac states simply.

"I guess man has a lot to learn."

"And does woman?" Mac playfully inquires.

"She does, but only about man," I reply almost inaudibly. But just before the moment can become strained or awkward the elephant pulls back and our hands drop.

"Time to start the show!" Max calls to us as he heads toward us in full costume. "Come my friends, take your seats and enjoy. Tonight we do special for Lukas."

"He would be honored," Mac tells Max with a warm smile. "Thank you again."

I too offer my thanks as we then turn and head for our seats, our hands now at our sides. We enter the noisy main auditorium and once again my enthusiasm isn't lost on the man at my side.

"What?" I have to ask.

"Your enthusiasm is infectious," he tells me with a wide grin.

"Good," I reply in truth; hoping that he would finally just loosen up and relax to the degree where he could tell himself in truth he was actually having fun. We walk up the few rows to our section and sit down, my eyes once again taking in everything with childish delight. The Ring Master comes out, decked in sparkly garb and holding a microphone; beckoning us all to take our seats as the show is about to begin.

"Ladies and Gentlemen! Boys and girls of all ages!" He starts in a loud tone.

I lean forward in my seat, my elbows now resting on my knees as I watch the first of the performers take to center stage, performing a few tricks to get the audience warmed up, my hands clapping along with everyone else's. I finally lean back I my seat and much to my surprise feel Mac's arm wrapped around the back of the chair, my shoulders now warming instantly to his touch.

"Is that comfortable?" He whispers in my ear, wanting to be heard over the loudness around us; his warm breath sending shivers down my spine.

"Very," I answer in truth and his arm remains.

We watch the elephants come on; Max and his team reserved for the feature show right after the intermission. I glance over at Mac and take much delight in his relaxed posture and peaceful look on his handsome face. My heart warms as I watch a boyish grin start to form once again as the silly clowns and guys on stilts start to do rather daring but well choreographed stunts.

"I miss hearing you laugh Mac," I tell him in truth as my fingers squeeze his.

"That might change after tonight, thanks to you."

"For that I will take credit."

"Hmm you seem to take a lot of credit in changing me Stella."

"Only for the best Mac."

He only smiles at my words and then our attention is quickly whisked away once again by thunderous clapping and we both settle in for another show before its intermission and time for something to eat.

"Do you trust me Mac?"

"Kinda hard to screw up hot dogs."

"What if they have something else?"

"I eat anything."

"Be right back."

I slowly move past Mac and join the crowds that are now in search of edible sustenance. I reach the concession stand order three hot dogs, one large caramel apple, a drink and then some strawberry licorice; my personal favorite. I head back to Mac and watch him watching me from our section; his lips smiling automatically when our eyes lock. I am hit with such a comfortable feeling; like he sees me and only me in this vast crowd and I can't get to his side fast enough.

"Looks harmless," Mac comments as I slowly ease myself down beside him.

"I slipped them a little extra to put something into the caramel to put you under my spell," I joke as I hand him a hot dog. "No wager this time."

"Afraid to lose this time Bonasera?" He lightly challenges.

"Afraid you'll be working overtime to make up for losing to me again Taylor," I retort and he chuckles. We both finish our one and a half hot dogs and then start on the caramel apple.

"Good thing I don't have braces," I huff as I take a bite and then pull at the gooey substance that is now hanging down my fingers.

"Same here," Mac frowns as he too works on getting the caramel into his mouth instead of on his lap.

"You missed...a...spot...here..." I lean in closer. In truth I only wanted to take the piece of sweet sludge from off his face with my fingers but being caught up in such a happy euphoria, I find myself leaning in closer, brushing his tender lips with my own, capturing the caramel with the tip of my tongue and allowing a chemical spark to ignite my core on fire.

"Mmm you taste good Mac," I tell him softly as my emerald eyes lock with his sapphire ones. Mac just stares at me in silent wonder; neither of us expecting my actions, but neither of us making a move to pull away in haste after those actions had concluded.

"I'm okay I don't want seconds. What?" Mac states and I just giggle. He gives his head a shake and then just smirks. "Blame the caramel."

"I'm blaming you instead."

"Me? What for?" Mac queries as he takes another bite.

"For being very tempting," I whisper in his ear, watching him instantly swallow and his face warm. I pull back with a smile, nod and then take another bite. I feel a piece of the soft caramel miss my mouth and land on my bottom lip. I then watch Mac lean in a bit closer but then pull back; unsure of his forward actions and how they'll be received.

"I think we have passed that safe boundary Mac," I tell him in truth as I quickly lick the caramel away, not wanting to force him into anything he's not quite ready for.

"And?"

"And nothing," I state matter of factly. "We just have. And yes before you ask, it is a good thing. So act on what you feel anytime you want to and stop over analyzing."

We finish the rest of our less than nutritious dinner offerings just as the intermission concludes. This time I find myself snuggling closer into Mac's strong frame; allowing his tempting scent mixed with warm caramel and sweet strawberry to fuel some already growing fantasies about the man beside me. Does he know how tempting he really is?

I see his hand resting on his thigh and wrap my left hand around it, delighting in his fingers grasping mine and once again flooding the left side of my body with warmth. We both watch Max and his team take to the stage; Max offering a few words about the loss of Lukas and how tonight's performance is dedicated to his memory and the fact that he loved to entertain those watching. I do wonder if him and Bernardo will actually make up; if the show they are putting on now is real or fake. I then think to Anasuya; she lost the most of out all of them.

I put aside my sorrow and watch the rest of the show, Mac and I exchanging small snippets about the amazing acrobatic feats we are witnessing and then become one melded entity until the final round of applause is offered and it's time to leave.

We slowly shuffle out with the rest, hard for us to be arm and arm as we are bumped from every side by the huge crowd until we are both outside and then heading toward a parked cab.

"Thank you again Mac," I tell him as we reach the waiting vehicle. His posture once again stiffens and I think he's unsure as to how to end the evening, but at this point I too am wondering how we'll part. We talk about the show we just saw until we are in front of my building, Mac walking me to the door as the true gentleman that he is.

"I wonder if tomorrow will be as exciting as today?" Mac wonders as his eyes lock with mine; his body close and his hand now resting on my upper arm.

"It can be if we make it exciting."

"Oh sorry I meant case wise," Mac gently frowns and I just smirk.

"Work is always exciting Mac," I remind him in haste.

"Right."

"But if you didn't mean work wise then what I said holds true."

"Stella, I'm not very exciting," Mac suddenly confesses with a nervous tone.

I lean in closer, my fingers now gently cupping his chin as I guide his lips to mine; perfect lips that I have been wanting to devour since I first tasted them with the caramel. His mouth emits a soft moan as his body accepts the invitation to lean into mine, our bond lingering. And while the kiss only lasts a few seconds, it feels as if a whole blissful eternity has passed by the time we break apart.

"Wow," Mac whispers as his lips curl into a wide grin.

"Mmm I agree," I reply as my fingers linger on his face. "You are more than you'll ever know Mac Taylor."

"Guess we are on the same plane on that because you are already more than most Stella Bonasera," Mac whispers as his fingers gently encase my cheek and his lips meet mine once more, another brief but heated showdown of passion and desire. This time it's my turn to offer him a small moan of delight in return for his forward actions. We left the friendship title behind long ago. This is something more.

"I guess I should say goodnight."

"And when you go to sleep what will your over active brain be pondering about tonight?"

"Our next date," he smiles as he leans in closer once more; our lips about to lock for a little bit longer.

And with those few heartfelt words my face lights up and I know that while tonight was just one night under the big top for most; for the two of us it was the start of a whole new future together.

THE END!

A/N: Gosh I think it's been as long for me as it was for Mac since I was at the circus. Do they still have an intermission? If not please excuse and I hope you all liked this anyways and thanks for reading!