This story is one that two of my friends made as a short short movie late one night, and it just seemed like something Teto would do. At least, my interpretation of Teto. :D
Title: 2 AM
Rating: K
Pairings/Characters: Teto Kasane with minor appearances by Ted Kasane and Inuhebi
Genre: Humor
Warnings: I suppose it could be called a PWP
Notes: I take no credit for the story, only my interpretation of it and its Vocaloid adaptation.
It was 2 AM in the Utau Manor. All was still, save for the occasional contented sigh from Inuhebi as he dreamt his snake-dog dreams of chasing cars driven by small rodents. The only light was the stove light, left on so that many a wandering singer, suffering from insomnia or insatiable hunger, could help themselves to a late night snack.
Which was what Teto Kasane was doing.
Humming along to the jazzy tune of "World of Max", the young UTAUloid rummaged through the cupboards, pulling out her pink T-embezzled bowl (or maybe it was Ted's, it didn't really matter) and setting it on the counter, next to the near-empty cereal box of Negi O's. Going into the fridge, she almost debated over finishing the box was worth it, if it was better to chop up a loaf of French bread, soak it in melted margarine and eat that like cereal, but shook her head 'no' as she grabbed the milk. Not only was that nonsensical and disgusting, even for her, but she knew that if she and Ted didn't get their bread in the morning, terrible things were sure to come. Like fruitcake and reality television.
Her cereal prepared, Teto tucked her long untied curly hair behind her ears and sat down at the long dining table. It was always growing, just like her family, but she always had a reserved seat by the head of the table that she never sat in when polite company was around. But since it was just her, it wouldn't hurt to sit in it for once. And so she did.
Teto poked at the cereal with her spoon for a moment, to spread the milk around, and prepared to take a bite, when something caught her eye. She looked up at the seat across from her, magenta eyes narrowing. "…You again."
Across from her was another Teto, dressed in her everyday clothes and twin drills curled to perfection, but her eyes conveyed even more mania than Teto's eyes normally did. A manifestation of Teto's hilarious insanity.
"Chicken tenderrrs," Other Teto whispered.
Teto stared.
"I have sunglasses." Other Teto pulled a pair of sunglasses out of her hammer-space and set them on her face.
Teto stared.
Other Teto took out a match and lit it. "Fiiiiiirrrre," she cried in a hushed whisper.
Teto stared.
Other Teto picked up Inuhebi and held him in front of her. How she did that, being just a manifestation and therefore not real, was still a mystery. "I have a snake-dog!"
Inuhebi barked quietly in confusion.
Teto stared.
Other Teto smiled Teto's ':D' smile, still holding Inuhebi.
Teto stared.
Other Teto put one boot clad foot on the table. "Feet."
Teto stared.
Other Teto stared as well, but at her foot. "Feet, feet, feet, feet, feet, feet…"
Teto stared.
Other Teto held out a cold, rainbow colored stick covered in plastic. "Freeeezer pooooop!" She took the wrapper off the popsicle and licked it once.
Teto held her head in her hands, avoiding eye contact as long as she could.
Other Teto was joined momentarily by Other Ted. Other Ted was not the manifestation of Ted's insanity, but rather his shota behavior. "I have a friend." Other Teto said.
Other Ted raised a hand, grinning adorably with his big, magenta, sparkly, shota eyes. "Hello."
Silently, Teto backed out of her seat, eyes still on her other, and slowly walked into the hallway. "Teeeed…!"
As soon as she was out of sight of Other Teto, the real Teto bolted to her brother's room, pajama clad feet sliding on the hardwood floor. She pulled open the door and flicked the lights on. "Ted!"
She was immediately hit in the head with one of Inuhebi's squeaky toys. It didn't hurt, but it surprised her enough that she fell to the floor, coming to her feet a moment later. "I-I'm okay…! Listen, Ted, I need your help with something."
Ted laid face down in his bed, his throwing arm laying languidly over the edge of the bed, and Inuhebi resting on his back. Teto wondered how he moved so fast and silently, but did not question it; if she were in Inuhebi's place, she'd rather be with Ted than herself any day. Ted made more sense.
Ted groaned slightly, not moving out from underneath his red bed sheets so he would not suffer the harsh light on consciousness. And the harsh light of his room. "Oh, whatever it is, I'm not helping."
Exasperated, Teto had to ask, "Why?"
"Cause I'm sleeping!"
His sister grabbed the doorknob in over exaggerated annoyance. "You suck." Teto turned off his light and closed his door, returning once more to the dining room.
Other Teto was now wielding a small meat cleaver with both hands, which she was using to chop an innocent banana into many mushy banana pieces.
(Other Ted had presumably gone back to real Ted. He never stayed long. He was the smart shota, unlike Other Len, who never realized the fangirls were about to start molesting him until it was too late, and moreover forgot that the fangirls did that every time he came out.)
Teto observed this for a moment, then sighed, and walked back to the kitchen. She knew what needed to be done.
Soon enough, Teto came back to the table holding a bottle of Akaito-brand jalapeño hot sauce, which she held before Other Teto.
Other Teto looked up at the real Teto and the hot sauce, dropped the cleaver and let out a shrill hiss, and vanished, returning from whence she came, from whence all the Others came: the lost city of Atlantis (of this, at least, Teto was sure).
And with a satisfied nod, Teto sat back down and returned to her snack, bottle of hot sauce at her side. She knew though, that this was not over, as today was only Tuesday. Tomorrow night, she would have to face Other Ritsu, better known as his masculinity. After that would be Other Defoko, who exhibited all her hidden emotions. And after that would be Other Taya, the real Taya's suppressed laziness. And after that could be Other Momo, Other Luna, Other Ruko, Other Sora, Other Anyone, really.
It was a rough, mentally taxing job, but someone had to do it. Teto was just the only one crazy enough for it, though besting herself was irritating at times.
But all would be well, come Other Ritsu, so long as she had her tennis racket.