Private: (sitting on the stool) Hmm… Now how did I end up here?

Voice: Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…

Private: (cringes) Where did that voice come from?

Voice: Private… He is mentally insane.

Private: Wha? No I'm not! My mind's perfectly stable… I think.

Voice: Right. Private… His accent is fake.

Private: That's not true! It's a real accent!

Voice: Yeah, a real fake one.

Private: It isn't fake!

Voice: Of course it is! Who ever hear of a British penguin? That makes as much sense as a hot dog that isn't hot!

Private: …?

Voice: Yeah… I have no idea where that came from… Anywayz, Private… He's Heart's baby's daddy!

Skipper and Tyler: WHAT?

Private: That's a lie! Heart doesn't even have a kid!

Voice: Not yet, anywayz.

Private: I'm beginning to think you're the one that's mentally insane!

Voice: Oh yeah? Well, Private… He's also Ace's baby's daddy.

Skipper: O.o; WTF?

Private: THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! ACE IS A GUY!

Voice: Nothing's impossible if you just believe in yourself! You just gotta believe~! (durr face)

Private: … (eye twitches) What?

Voice: I don't know. I got that off some movie or something. Private… He has a mangina.

Private: A what?

Voice: A man with a vagina! XD

Private: (OxO)' ….Are there people really like that?

Voice: Yeah, you should know. You're one of them.

Private: -_-; I'm not even gonna try to argue anymore.

Voice: Good. You made my job a bit easier. Private… He was dropped on his head when he was an egg.

Private: (glares)

Voice: Wow, that's one evil look… Um, so now you know Private the mentally insane penguin who has a baby with both Ace and Heart and has been dropped as an egg!

Yeah, I had to hurry. I did this during class and I don't have much time left. ^^; Hope you guys enjoyed! Oh! And the "His accent is fake" thing I got from skullshovel's Know the Characters.