BROtp. Spoilers for 5x7 The Rough Patch--and well most of Season Five up until then.

AN: The prologue for a series of inspiration that hit me based on John Mayer's song Heartbreak Warfare, not exactly a songfic as much as it is a lyricfic based on the different lines of the song. more to come.

"Lightning strikes, inside my chest to keep me up all night. Dream of ways, to make you understand my pain."

Maybe it hasn't hit him yet. Or maybe all of the sex and booze has just desensitized him. He wants to believe the sorry excuse of the latter.

They really just did that.

And now he's watching her walk into the bar to tell everyone else.

But now he's wondering if their break up was an escape, an easy way out now so it didn't get serious later. He tilts his head in confusion trying to compute the barrage of second thoughts and feelings induced insanity. Theoretically, (theoretically meaning in reference to the Lily/Marshall theory) one did not just mutually agree to call it quits after one party of the couple persuasion has been in love with the other party for a year. Two awesome's cancel each other out, where did that load of BS come from?

He nervously runs his fingers through his hair now and desperately needs a cigarette, something, ANYTHING to quench this hole that's beginning to split his chest wide open. This is new. There's never been a hole before. Using the elbow of his suit—he'd have to burn it, he did not want to catch any 'I'm making a giant mistake' feelings later—he peered through the window of the bar to see what was going on.

Robin is casually explaining it to them; they had the whole conversation planned out before she even walked into the bar. How it was mutual, how they both decided it would be for the betterment of both them and the group, how they were smothering each other.

She isn't going to mention the pact they made. And he won't tell her how his heart literally exploded at the thought of beating Ted to Robin.

The coast looks clear now, Robin is done talking, and everyone looks to be thinking about what to say next. What do you say to that, the perpetual bachelor and bachelorette broken up, both single again? Even Alan Thicke looks to be stumped. But it was expected right? No one expected Barney Stinson to seriously date a woman, especially one the caliber of one Robin Scherbatsky.

He can't exactly decipher Robin's expression or anything about her at the moment. She looks okay, relieved almost over her words as Lily and Marshall begin to spit out incoherent sentences to make sense of the events that have just occurred. But there's something else there; he just can't put his finger on it. His vision is beginning to blur as the familiar aching, dull pain ripples throughout his chest, settling in, and claiming its territory.

He's making a huge mistake.

Pulling a small, silver flask from his jacket pocket, he downs the remaining contents returning the pain and emptiness to only a shadow of what it was two seconds ago. Reminding himself to refill his medicine, he straightens his tie, adjusts his cuff links, and throws the bar door open. He quickly swallows the bile in his throat for possibly his greatest show ever.

"Daddy's home."