A/N: For Indubitably-Epic. I know this has nothing to do with the quote you gave me to go with the suggestion but I am going to use it for another MerAdd fic because you're right, it's perfect. Hope you enjoy this =)
And everyone check out Indubitably-Epic's MerAdd fics, they're fab.
Reviews appreciated as always.
iam-kelly.
At first it was a kiss, a stupidly impulsive -kiss away your tears- kiss. Meredith found Addison in a supply closet crying to herself, in a similar position to where she had been after the 'panties' incident, except this time she didn't tell Meredith to get lost and Meredith didn't give her a chance she just closed the door behind her and sat down on the floor in front of her.
"You don't have to tell me you just shouldn't be alone when you cry" Meredith said simply.
"When did everything get so hard?" Addison sniffed wiping her eyes.
"When was it ever easy?" Meredith replied.
"You have a point" Addison said with an exasperated laugh.
"I'm going to hug you now" Meredith said getting onto her knees and shuffling over to Addison, she wrapped her arms around her, Addison reluctantly -at first- returned the hug, her chin resting on Meredith's shoulder, as they pulled back Meredith reached her small hands up and wiped the tears from Addison's cheeks before kissing them both softly, they made eye contact for a few brief seconds before Addison's eyelids closed slowly, Meredith placed another kiss on her cheek before kissing her lips softly, she didn't know why, she just did and then she did it again, and again, and again before Addison grabbed onto the back of her head and held her in place as mouths started to part and tongues started to search and moans started to escape and every movement was slow, tantalizingly slow, and Meredith's hands remained on Addison's cheeks and Addison's slipped into Meredith's hair.
"What the hell was that?" Addison whispered as they pulled away, foreheads pressed together.
"Sometimes you just need to be kissed" Meredith shrugged.
~x~
The second time they crossed the line was the day before Addison left for LA, the day before Meredith left for Hawaii with Cristina. Meredith needed some time, some time to think, so she went to the empty OR gallery, she sat at the back, knees tucked into her chest, arms wrapped around her legs, her chin resting in the crook of her knees. Addison walked in not aware of Meredith's presence, she stepped over to the glass and placed her hand flat on it.
"What are you doing?" said Meredith.
"Jesus, Meredith!" Addison exclaimed turning to face her "Are you trying to kill me?"
"Sorry" Meredith sighed.
"What are you doing here anyway" Addison said sitting in the chair next to her.
"I'm going to Hawaii with Cristina tomorrow, I just need some time, to think, what are you doing here?"
"Saying goodbye"
"Goodbye?" Meredith frowned.
"I'm moving to LA, tomorrow"
"What?! Why!?" Meredith exclaimed dropping her legs to the floor.
"There's nothing left for me here anymore" Addison said softly "I didn't get Chief and I needed that job, I needed it and Richard told me, he said, if you need a job to give you a life, you either need a new job or a new life and my best friend Naomi, she offered me a job when I visited so, I'm taking it, a new job and a new life"
"Well you'll be missed around here y'know"
"Yeah, sure" Addison smirked.
"You will" Meredith said softly.
"Thanks" Addison sighed "Don't take this the wrong way but, you look sad Meredith"
"I am sad" Meredith sighed "Trust me, you don't want to know"
"Try me"
"I think me and Derek are breaking up"
"Oh" Addison said with surprise.
"Told you you wouldn't want to know" Meredith said leaning forward and burying her face in her hands "This is so messed up"
"That's life" Addison said rubbing her back softly.
"Yeah, well life sucks" Meredith grumbled sitting back up "I should go" she said standing up "Need to pack and stuff so…."
"Yeah, me too" Addison said standing up.
"Well, I guess this is goodbye then" Meredith said holding out her hand, Addison took it and shook it a little.
"Goodbye Meredith"
"Goodbye Addison"
Meredith turned to walk out, turning back when Addison called her name "Yeah?"
"Come here" Addison said holding out her hand, Meredith stepped forward a little, Addison pulled her in close and kissed her softly, tongues searching quickly, hands gripping onto arms and waists and hair.
"What was that for?" Meredith asked as they breathlessly pulled away.
"Sometimes you just need to be kissed" Addison shrugged.
~x~
Their third encounter was on Addison's short visit to Seattle. After hearing that Meredith and Derek were well and truly over for good, that Meredith had been replaced for a doe eyed scrub nurse Addison almost sought her out. She found her at a nurses station tapping her pen against her chart.
"We need to talk" she whispered in Meredith's ear "On-call room, 5 minutes"
Meredith didn't get a chance to respond.
Addison sat on the edge of one of the beds waiting patiently for Meredith to show, because she knew she would, and soon enough the door was opened, closed, and locked.
"You wanted to talk" Meredith said quietly.
"So you really broke up huh"
"We really broke up" Meredith smirked "You met the nurse yet?" she said climbing onto the bed and sitting with her legs crossed, Addison pushed herself back a little so her back was against the wall, she kicked off her heels and crossed her legs.
"I may have asked who the unlucky McRebound was in surgery and she may have been the woman standing next to me" Addison said sheepishly.
"McRebound?" Meredith said with a raised eyebrow.
"Shut up" Addison groaned hitting her leg with an ineffectual fist.
"Hey, I didn't say a thing" Meredith laughed.
"So, how are you?" Addison asked carefully.
"I'm good actually" Meredith nodded "Just focussing on the clinical trial and my friends, and seeing an insane therapist"
"Your seeing a therapist?"
"Yeah" Meredith said with a laugh "I read a study that said just the act of going to therapy is beneficial even if you don't say anything but then we did start saying things and now she's just making me a little crazy, like I want to throw things at her crazy"
"Therapists can do that" Addison smirked "One of my new friends, in LA, she's a therapist, she's forever trying to analyze me, I don't think my life is worth analyzing anymore"
"So I'm dark and twisty, so what?! So Derek's with someone else now! Who cares?! We broke up for a reason and now she's calling me a coward"
"She called you a coward?"
"Well not in so many words" Meredith sighed "When did everything get so hard?"
"When was it ever easy?"
Meredith just looked at her and let out a laugh "We're a little pathetic aren't we"
"Yeah" Addison sighed "We are….do you need a hug?"
"I could do with a hug" Meredith smiled, Addison moved onto her knees and leaned over to Meredith wrapping her arms around her.
"Your going to be fine Meredith" she mumbled into Meredith's hair.
"So are you" Meredith smiled, Addison pulled back a little and sat back on her knees, she reached out and tucked a piece of Meredith's hair behind her ear, she leaned forward and pressed her lips against her forehead, and then her cheek, and then the corner of her mouth and then Meredith's arms were around her neck and she was lying back on the bed, Addison settled between her legs as they kissed, a kiss full of nibbling teeth and soft lips, Addison trailed her kisses along Meredith's neck, a neck that Meredith stretched up to give Addison more access.
She gasped as Addison's hand slipped up her shirt and massaged her breast through the lace of her bra, Addison sat back a little and helped Meredith pull off her shirt as well as quickly ridding herself of her own, she shed Meredith of her bra and almost instantly took a nipple in her mouth, she swirled her tongue around it as her thumb and forefinger teased the other, she removed the hand causing Meredith to whimper, which soon turned into a gasp as her hand moved into Meredith's scrub pants and rubbed her clit through her panties.
"Wait, stop" Meredith said firmly, Addison looked up at her with concern.
"What's wrong?" she frowned.
"We have too many clothes on" Meredith muttered, she slipped out from underneath Addison and stripped down to nothing, Addison soon followed "Lie down" Meredith whispered, Addison lay back on the bed, Meredith leaned over and kissed her softly "You are so beautiful" she said quietly.
"So are you" Addison smiled softly "I want you"
"You have me" Meredith said kissing her again before straddling her body backwards, she backed up a little so her wetness hovered over Addison's face, she leaned forward, her breasts pressing against Addison's abdomen, her face at her crotch, she began to slowly rub against Addison's clit with her fingers, her hips bucked slightly as Addison licked her tongue along Meredith's slit. They writhed against each other, touching each other with tongues and fingers, tasting every last drop of the cum that seeped out of them, moans muffled as they sucked against each others clits, bodies quivering, pressing hard against each others, they lost all awareness of time and space, heads clouding with pleasure, a race against the clock to bring each other to the incredible high they were both desperate for and it was as if they became one, as Meredith pushed herself down on Addison's face and Addison pushed herself up to Meredith's and they both let out muffled screams of each others names, and as their bodies relaxed Meredith climbed off Addison and moved to lie in the small space next to her, their bodies entwined, legs merging with legs, arms wrapped around bodies, foreheads pressed together as they kissed softly.
"Well, that was new" Addison breathed.
"Good new?"
"Fantastic new" Addison said with a laugh.
"Have you ever, y'know, before?"
"No" Addison smirked "Have you?"
"Once, but I was 19 and drunk and I can't really remember it"
"Oh you naughty girl Dr Grey, I always knew you were the type to break the law" Addison teased.
"So your telling me in college you were an angel sent from heaven" Meredith teased back.
"I guess I had my moments" Addison laughed.
"Can we just stay like this?" Meredith mumbled snuggling closer -if that was possible- to Addison's body.
"Don't you have patients?"
"They can page me"
"Then we'll stay like this, until they page you"
"Good" Meredith sighed "Why doesn't this feel wrong?"
"Because we're both still coming down from pretty incredible highs" Addison said with a laugh.
"Well yeah but, it should feel, wrong, because you're well, you're you and, I'm me and, I don't have to say it do I?"
"No" Addison said softly "And you don't even have to think about it, lets just, be an us, for a little bit longer"
"A little bit longer" Meredith smiled.
By the time Meredith was paged they were both fast asleep, they both snapped their eyes open and groaned, not wanting to move away from each other.
"I guess this goodbye, again" Meredith said quietly as she finished slipping on her clothes.
"Yeah" Addison said softly sitting up and wrapping the sheet around her "This was, amazing"
"Yeah, it really was" Meredith smiled, she leant back over to her and kissed her softly "Have a safe flight ok?"
"I will" Addison smiled "Meredith, don't let him get away ok?"
"Goodbye Addison" Meredith said quietly.
"Goodbye Meredith"
~x~
Meredith did as Addison asked. She got Derek back and she was happy, she was but she couldn't help but think about her time with the beautiful red-head who had once stole her 'McLife' and then 6 months later she was back, with her LA life in tow. Meredith worked quietly on her brother's case, words not getting past a quiet hello as she entered the room, her heart flinched as she watched Addison watch Archer with pure sadness running through her eyes and as she finally got a minute to take a rest in an on-call room she found Addison sat in the middle of the bed, tears streaming down her face.
"Hey" Addison sniffed "Sorry I was just…."
"You don't need to apologize" Meredith said walking over to her and sitting down on the bed "He's going to be fine y'know, Derek can do it"
"I know" Addison breathed "It's just, I know me and my brother haven't always had the best relationship but, he's my brother, my Archie and, I can't lose him"
"I know" Meredith said rubbing her arm softly "Come on, hug me" she said opening her arms, Addison let out a laugh and let Meredith wrap her arms around her "Lie down" she whispered.
"Meredith we can't" Addison said with a shaky voice.
"I'm just making you feel better" Meredith said softly as she placed her lips against Addison's.
"Don't cheat for me" Addison whispered.
"He doesn't need to know" Meredith said pushing Addison back onto the bed "I'm just making you feel better" she smiled kissing Addison's neck "Relax Addie"
Addison sighed heavily and relaxed into Meredith's touch, all thoughts of adultery disappeared as Meredith pushed up her skirt and pushed her panties down, her fingers slipping quickly inside, her tongue connecting with her clit, and after 10 minutes of teasing her most sensitive spots Addison came screaming "Meredith"
They barely had a chance to get their breath back, or move from their position, Meredith's head buried between Addison's legs when they heard the door slam, they shot their heads up to see Callie stood their with wide eyes.
"I was just coming to see if you were ok but it seems Meredith here has that covered" she said with a shaky voice.
"Callie I…." Addison started as she sat up slightly "I uh"
"I'm going to look at the wall while you clean yourself up then I'm going to turn back and we're going to talk ok?"
"Ok" Addison said with a whimper.
A minute later and Meredith and Addison were sat on the edge of the bed heads hung low, Callie stood firmly in front of them.
"So, what the hell is this?!" she exclaimed.
"It's nothing" Addison sighed.
"Nothing! Your ex-husbands girlfriend with her head between you legs is not nothing! Has this happened before?!"
"Once" said Meredith "When Addison came back the last time"
Callie snorted a little "Looks like I wasn't the only one learning how to speak the vagina monologues"
"Ha ha" Addison said dryly.
"So, what is this? You come back to visit and you have sex?"
"It just happened, kind of" Meredith sighed "I don't know what this is ok!"
"Why is it always me?!" Callie exclaimed.
"Always you what?" Addison frowned.
"Who finds out these things, it's always me, and it always seems to be a Grey girl"
"A Grey girl?" Meredith asked curiously "Oh god, she is sleeping with him!"
"Who's sleeping with who?" asked Addison.
"Mark and Lexie"
"Oh yeah, I totally called him on that one" Addison smirked.
"Ugh, I'll kill him later" Meredith sighed "Look, Callie, I know we're not exactly friends and I know you've covered for me before and…."
"She's covered for you before?"
"Well I kind of walked in on the frantic throwing on of clothes at prom and pulled the panties off the bulletin board pretending they were mine" Callie muttered.
"Right, sorry about that" Addison said with a nervous laugh.
"I deserved it" Meredith shrugged "So Callie, your not, your not going to say anything right? To anyone?"
"Of course I won't" Callie sighed "But you need to figure this out"
"We know" they both muttered.
"So I'm gonna go, and you are going to talk ok?"
"Ok" they both nodded.
"Ok" Callie sighed leaving the room quickly.
"We shouldn't have done that" Addison sighed shaking her head a little "We shouldn't have done that"
"I know" Meredith sighed "It's my fault, I came on to you"
"I could have tried harder to stop you Meredith" said Addison.
"Why didn't you?"
"Because I wanted it" Addison whispered with a hint of shame.
"I wanted it too" said Meredith softly "I haven't been able to stop thinking about you, about us, not really"
"Me neither"
"Ok so lets just forget everyone else for a minute, say there's just you and me, no past, just us" Meredith started "Would you want to be with me? Be a couple? Do you want me?"
"Do you?"
"I asked first" Meredith smirked.
"Then yeah, yes I would want to be with you, be a couple, I do want you"
"I want that too" Meredith whispered cupping Addison's face with her hand "I want you Addison, I can't help myself, I just want you"
"You love Derek Meredith and he loves you, so much, I shouldn't tell you this but, there's a ring"
"A ring?"
"An engagement ring, Mark blurted, he wants to marry you Meredith, he has a ring for you! I'm not going to split you up and I wouldn't move back here"
"He knows I don't want to marry him"
"You do, you just don't know you do"
"I know that I want you"
"For gods sake Meredith stop!" Addison exclaimed standing up sharply "Just stop it! You don't want me! Not really! Not like I want you! You want Derek, you always have! You love him!"
"I love you!" Meredith shouted.
"Take it back" Addison said quickly "Take. It. Back."
"I can't take it back" Meredith whispered, she slowly stood up and stepped in close to Addison "I love you" she said kissing her neck "I love you" Kiss "I want you" Kiss "I love you"
"We can't" Addison whispered dropping her head onto Meredith's shoulder "We can't"
"I love you"
"I know" Addison said softly as she wrapped her arms around her "And I love you too but we can't"
"I'll move to LA" Meredith said pulling back slightly and looking directly at Addison "I'll come to LA with you, we can be together, we can be us"
"Don't do this for me Meredith, I'm not worth it, I'm never worth it"
"Don't be ridiculous" Meredith scoffed "You are always worth it, don't you ever think that, ever!"
"I need to go" Addison said pulling herself completely away "I should go"
"Addison" Meredith sighed.
"It's for the best" Addison said leaving quickly.
~x~
Meredith broke up with Derek two days after Addison left. She told him she would always love him but she was simply not in love with him anymore. He was devastated, obviously, he even pulled out the engagement ring as some sort of ploy to get her back but she was done, she couldn't lead him on anymore. She called around the LA hospitals and got herself a place on a residency programme at St Ambrose, she pulled the Ellis Grey card out which she hated doing but she needed the job. She handed in her notice at Seattle Grace, she said her goodbyes to her closest friends, none of them knowing why she was really leaving, she told them she just needed change. She made one last stop at Cristina and Callie's apartment before getting into her car and making the long drive down to the sun.
"Meredith, hey" Callie stuttered as she opened the front door "Cristina's not here"
"I know, I just saw her, I uh, I need to ask you something"
"Ok, come on in" Callie said opening the door "What can I do you for?"
"I need Addison's address"
"Erm, ok, why?"
"Because I just quit my job at Seattle Grace and got myself onto a residency in LA and I have nowhere to sleep"
"Your moving to LA" Callie said with a raised eyebrow.
"I love her" Meredith said softly "I told her and, she said it back but, she told me I shouldn't do it, told me not to leave, to stay and be with Derek but I can't do that, I want to be with her so I need her address, I need to go to her"
"Does anyone know?" Callie asked as she dug through her purse for her address book.
"They know I'm leaving, that I'm going to LA but, they don't know why"
"Not even Cristina?"
"No. I will tell them, I will I just, I need to get there first, I need to see her"
"Ok" Callie said softly as she scribbled out the address on a scrap of paper "I won't say a thing" she said handing it over "Take care of yourself Meredith and, and take care of her, this is me giving the 'you hurt my best friend and you die' speech ok?"
"Ok" Meredith said with a laugh "Thank you Callie"
"You go get her Meredith"
~x~
Meredith was almost there, she was 10 minutes away from Addison's place according to her sat-nav, she thought it best to buy one instead of trying to tackle a map on her own. Her heart was beating fast in her chest, she could almost feel it in her ears, she pulled onto Addison's drive, it was almost 9pm on the day after she left Seattle, she stepped out of her car, brushed down her clothes and stepped towards the front door, she reached out and rang the doorbell, she heard footsteps coming towards her, the door swung open, Addison stood shock still.
"Hey" Meredith said softly, Addison just continued to stare at her "I broke up with him" Meredith said quietly "I transfered to St Ambrose and I have a car full of my crap, all I need now is a place to put it"
"Meredith" Addison choked out "What, what are you doing?"
"Showing you your worth it" Meredith said pulling Addison into a kiss "I love you Addie" she whispered "You are worth the world to me" she smiled kissing her some more.
"I love you too" Addison said kissing her softly "Even if you are a little insane"
"Well, I can't deny that" Meredith said with a laugh "So are you going to let me in or not?"
Addison just flashed her a grin and pulled her into the house, the door slamming behind them.
~x~
Meredith did eventually tell her friends why she had left, they were shocked to say the least but when they all made visits out to LA they all got it, even Cristina, they were meant to be together, they were perfect.
10 years passed before they had to venture back to Seattle, 10 years where nobody except for Callie, Arizona, Cristina, Izzie, Alex, George, Lexie and eventually Mark -because Lexie couldn't keep secrets from him- knew the truth, 10 years which included a weekend trip to Boston to make vows on their 3rd Anniversary, 10 years which included the births of 3 children, 5 year old Benjamin Luke, 2 year old Ella Grace and 1 month old Scarlet May. They were the envy of all their friends, the perfect family unit, a family unit that were requested to attend the wedding of Lexie and Mark. And they couldn't very well say no.
"Meredith!" Lexie shouted across the airport.
"Hey!" Meredith grinned back, Benjamin appeared from behind her legs and ran straight for Lexie.
"Aunt Lexie!" he said happily as he wrapped himself around her legs.
"No way, that can't be my Benjamin can it?" Lexie gasped bending down to his level "You're so grown up"
"I'm 5!" Benjamin grinned.
"Wow, you are grown up" Lexie smiled "Are you excited for the wedding my little ring bearer?"
"Yes! Mommy says I look really handsome in my suit" he nodded proudly.
"I bet you do" Lexie smiled.
"Hey Lex" Meredith smiled as she reached them with the luggage trolly, Lexie stood up and hugged Meredith tightly.
"Thank you for coming"
"I wouldn't miss it for the world" Meredith smiled.
"Where's Addison?"
"Putting Ella in the stroller, she told us to go ahead"
"You did bring Scarlet too right?"
"Of course" Meredith smiled "She has to meet her Aunt Lexie"
"They're here" Benjamin smiled "Mama, over here!" he shouted.
Addison smiled and walked over to them pushing Ella's stroller, Scarlet settled in the babybjorn.
"Hey" Addison smiled.
"It's great to see you" Lexie smiled, she crouched down to Ella and tickled her stomach a little "And look at you Ella, you are growing by the second" she smiled kissing her nose, Ella just giggled "And this must be Scarlet" Lexie smiled standing up and peering into the babybjorn "Oh guys she's gorgeous"
"She is isn't she" Addison said softly "Right, we should get going, get this over with"
"Thanks" Lexie said dryly.
"You know what I mean Lexie" Addison laughed.
"I know, I know" Lexie sighed "Everything is going to be fine, if we get through the pre-wedding party we can get through the wedding"
"Wait! Pre-wedding party?!" Meredith exclaimed.
"Ah, well, we didn't want to have a rehearsal dinner so we're just having everyone over to the house instead, just all of the friends and well, Dad's going to be there, I probably should have warned you about that huh?"
"Yeah, would have been nice" Meredith sighed "It's fine, we're fine, I can do this"
"We can do this honey" Addison said kissing her softly.
"We'll have an hour or so before they all get there, we'll get you settled in the guest rooms" said Lexie "Come on, lets go"
"We can do this" Meredith sighed as she sat on the bed in Lexie's guest room.
"We can Mer, we're ready" Addie said softly "You just need to breathe"
"I know" Meredith smiled "I love you"
"I love you too honey" Addison said leaning down to kiss her "Come on, time to go downstairs"
"Are the kids ok?"
"Alex seems to have stolen them from us" Addison laughed "You know how much Ben loves him"
"Yeah" Meredith smiled.
"Ella seems to be taking a shine to him too, she's sat on his lap on the floor watching Ben play with his cars"
"Make sure we get a picture of that" Meredith smiled softly "And how is my little angel?" she said kissing the top of Scarlet's head.
"She is perfect aren't you baby girl" Addison smiled.
"Can I have her? I need to hold her"
"Of course you can hon, she's your daughter" Addison laughed "Here you go" she said handing Scarlet over.
"I love that smell, the baby smell" Meredith smiled as she held Scarlet against her chest "Makes everything feel better"
"I think I just fell in love with you all over again" Addison said kissing her softly "My insane wife"
"Your insane wife" Meredith laughed.
~x~
"Meredith, hello" Thatcher said nervously approaching Meredith who was stood dangerously close to the alcohol table, hating just for that moment that she was still breast-feeding.
"Thatcher" she nodded.
"So, who's this little one?"
"This is my daughter, Scarlet, she's one month"
"Oh, Lexie didn't tell me you had a daughter"
"I have two, and a son, they're over there" she said nodding over to Alex who still sat with both kids "Benjamin's 5 and Ella's 2"
"Right" Thatcher smiled "So I have more grandbabies"
"Yeah, I guess you do" Meredith sighed.
"I'm very sorry Meredith, I want you to know that, for everything, for leaving you, for everything with Susan I, I was in a bad place then"
"Yeah, so was I"
"Just one more chance Meredith, that's all I'm asking"
"I live in LA now, you know that right? I'm going back after the wedding"
"I know" he said softly "But maybe if I could call, to see how you are, how your children are, that would be a start, right?"
"This is your last chance Thatcher, I mean that"
"I know, thank you" Thatcher smiled "They're beautiful kids Meredith"
"I know" Meredith smiled "They're my world, my kids and my wife, they're my world"
"Wife?" Thatcher said with a raised eyebrow.
"Do you remember Addison Montgomery, she was Molly and Laura's doctor"
"Yes, of course"
"Well I married her 7 years ago, flew to Boston for the weekend on our 3rd anniversary, we'll have been together 10 years in September"
"Well congratulations Meredith, I mean that, is she here?"
"Yeah, she's in the kitchen catching up with Callie and Mark"
"Well I'll have to say hello later, it really is good to see you Meredith" he said squeezing her hand, Meredith merely smiled and watched as Thatcher walked away, she turned and stared at the table of alcohol "You my baby are killing me" she mumbled to Scarlet "You better love me an awful lot"
"Talking to yourself?"
Meredith snapped around to see Derek stood in front of her.
"Oh, maybe not" he stuttered.
"Hey" she said quietly.
"Hey" he smiled.
"When did you get here?"
"Only just"
"Oh, well uh, how are you?"
"I'm good, how are you?"
"I'm good, great" Meredith smiled "Tired but, great"
"How old is she?" Derek asked noticing the pink of the babygro.
"A month, so still finds it funny to scream in the middle of the night" Meredith said with a small laugh.
"Do you have anymore, kids?"
"Yeah, Benjamin, he's 5 and Ella's 2, they're with Alex" she said nodding over to them.
"Well, this is, a surprise, who's the lucky guy?"
"I uh, well, that's the thing" Meredith stuttered.
"Meredith I….Derek" Addison stuttered stopping next to them.
"Addison, I uh, didn't know you were coming"
"Yeah well uh" she stuttered again, she looked down when she felt a tug at her trousers.
"Mama" Ella cried "Benben hurt" she said pointing at a small scratch on her arm.
"Oh baby girl come here" Addison said picking her up "Magic kiss to make it better?"
"Ok Mama" Ella sniffed, Addison kissed her arm softly.
"All better?" she smiled.
"Better" Ella nodded.
"Am I gonna tell him off or you?" Addison muttered to Meredith, not quite sure if Derek had caught on yet.
"I'll do it" Meredith sighed "Benjamin Luke Montgomery-Grey get over here right now!" she shouted, Benjamin sulked over to them "Are you going to tell me why you scratched your sister?"
"She wouldn't give me the car back!"
"Benjamin we've talked about this" said Addison "Ella hasn't learnt about sharing properly yet, you should have come to me or your Mommy"
"I'm sorry Mama, sorry Mommy" he pouted.
"Now say sorry to Ella" said Meredith.
"Sorry Ellabella"
"Ok honey, go back and play now" Addison smiled "You going with him Ella?"
Ella nodded with a smiled, Addison put her down on the floor "You be nice to each other ok?"
"Yes Mama" Benjamin smiled.
"Good boy" Addison smiled "Now go and play"
"Ok" Benjamin smiled leading Ella away.
"I think I deserve and explanation don't you" Derek managed to choke out.
"I'll just go and put Scarlet down in the bedroom" Meredith said quietly walking away.
"Let's go outside" Addison said not meeting Derek's eye.
"And so it begins" Cristina muttered as she watched Addison lead Derek outside.
After putting Scarlet in her crib Meredith made her way downstairs and outside where Addison and Derek sat opposite each other at the garden table, neither one looking at each other or saying a word, she quietly walked out and sat down in the chair next to Addison.
"I don't even know what to say" Derek said quietly "How long has this been going on?"
"10 years" said Meredith "We've been married for 7"
"You left 10 years ago" he sighed "You, you left, you left for her"
"Yes" Meredith nodded "Yeah, I left for her, she asked me not too, she told me to stay in Seattle but I wanted to be with her so I left"
"You broke up with me for her"
"Yes"
"So I'm guessing this started before we split up"
"We slept together when I came back the first time" said Addison "When you were broken up and…."
"And yes, we slept together when she came out here with her brother" said Meredith "Just before I broke up with you"
"I actually can't believe this" Derek said running his hands over his face "I can't believe this, am I the only one who doesn't know?"
"Pretty much" Addison sighed "We should have told you"
"Yeah, you should have"
"Do you hate us?" Meredith asked innocently.
"I don't know, I don't even, I don't know what I'm thinking" he said shaking his head "What do I think? You cheated on me Meredith, with my ex-wife, you cheated on me"
"I know" she said quietly "I'm so sorry, I'm sorry I did that, it was, it was my fault"
"Meredith how many times do I have to tell you that it wasn't your fault" said Addison.
"I know, I just, I know" Meredith sighed.
"You've stayed together all this time?" asked Derek.
"Never been apart" said Addison.
"Never?"
"Never" said Meredith.
"I have to, I need a drink" Derek said standing up "Yeah, a drink" he said walking back into the house.
"It could have gone worse" Addison sighed.
"I guess" Meredith muttered.
"Come here, hug me" Addison said opening her arms, Meredith moved over and sat on Addison's lap, burying her head into the crook of her neck "I love you Mer"
"I love you too" Meredith mumbled "I just, I know we don't see him or even speak to him but, I don't want him to hate us"
"He doesn't honey, he's just in shock right now"
"We are pretty shocking" Meredith smirked.
"We are" Addison laughed "I love our shockingly insane little family"
"I love it too" Meredith smiled.
~x~
Meredith and Addison spent the following two days before the wedding catching up with all their friends, they kept in contact with them but it was nice to sit and chat, and then the day of the wedding came. They spent the morning helping to prepare for the main event, Meredith had opted out of being a bridesmaid, still not feeling 100% herself after having Scarlet but she did her best to make Lexie's day go smoothly, playing more of a mother of the bride part.
"Ok, this is it Lex" she smiled as she adjusted Lexie's veil "You look stunning"
"Thank you for being here Meredith"
"What are big sisters for?"
"Thank for that too"
"For what?"
"For being my sister, for accepting me" Lexie said tears starting to come to both of their eyes.
"No no, stop, or we'll have to do our make up again" Meredith said taking a deep breath "You ok?"
"Ok" Lexie smiled.
"I should go and sit down, I'll see you after, good luck" she smiled hugging her closely.
Meredith made her way into the church she went straight to the front to check on Benjamin who was not so patiently waiting for his big moment as ring bearer.
"Ben sweetie you ready?" Meredith said bending down to him.
"Now?!"
"No, not now, when the minister asks you for the rings ok? You have the rings right?"
"Right here Mommy" Ben said pulling the small box from his pocket.
"You keep hold of them ok? I'm going to sit with Mama and the girls now, so you stay here with your Uncle Mark"
"I will" Ben smiled.
"Good boy" Meredith smiled, she stood up and stepped in front of Mark, Derek point blank ignored her presence "So, this is it, after this no more dirty mistresses club" she joked.
"Definitely not" Mark smiled "Thanks for coming Mer" he said kissing her cheek.
"My pleasure, you treat her right ok?"
"Promise" he smiled.
Meredith walked over to where Addison was sat with Scarlet in her arms, Ella sat next to her, her little legs only just reaching the edge of the bench.
"Come here baby" Meredith said lifting her up and sitting her on her lap, she scooted close to Addison's body and rested a hand on her leg "You look beautiful today" she smiled up at her.
"So do you" Addison smiled leaning in to kiss her "I love you"
"I love you too" Meredith smiled sharing another kiss with her.
"So the rumors are true"
Meredith and Addison looked behind them and saw the Chief taking a seat.
"Richard! Hey" Addison smiled, he leaned forward and kissed them both on the cheek.
"So…." he started.
"Yes I left to go and be with Addie, yes we've been married for 7 years and yes we have 3 kids" Meredith sighed "And yes, we should have told you, we're sorry"
"Don't worry about it" he smiled softly "So, let's see these kids"
"Well, this is Ella" Meredith said lifting Ella up a little bit "She's 2"
"And this is Scarlet, she's one month" Addison said adjusting Scarlet so she rested against her shoulder "And our little man Benjamin is up there with Mark, he's 5"
"They're beautiful ladies" the Chief smiled.
"Thanks Chief" Meredith smiled "Oh, here we go" she smiled happily as the music began, she snuggled into Addison's side and watched the ceremony unfold.
~x~
That evening the wedding reception was in full swing, Benjamin spent his time playing with Alex and Izzie who since the arrival of the Montgomery-Grey's decided it was time to start trying for their own. Ella was happily playing with Thatcher, Meredith decided to let him have some time with her before they left, she couldn't help but smile every time she saw Ella's face light up. Scarlet slept quietly in the car seat on the chair next to Addison.
"Wanna dance honey?" Addison smiled wrapping her arms around Meredith from behind, her chin resting on her shoulder.
"Sure, Cris can you watch Scarlet?"
"Sure but if she pukes or poops I'm coming to get you"
"Thank you Cristina" Meredith smirked, she took Addison's hand and led her over to the dance floor, Addison rested her arms on Meredith's shoulders, her fingers playing with the ends of her hair, Meredith's arms wrapped around Addison's waist as they moved slowly to the music.
"Did you ever think we'd get here?" Meredith asked quietly as she looked into Addison's eyes.
"Never" Addison laughed "But I'm glad we did"
"Me too" Meredith smiled "I love our life, the practice and our friends and our kids, and you, I love you"
"I love you too" Addison smiled dropping her forehead onto Meredith's "How about we ship Ben and Ella off to Naomi's, the weekend after your last post-natal check-up?"
"What about Scarlet?"
"She's a month old Mer, I'm sure she won't notice her Mommy's taking a little time for themselves"
"Ok" Meredith smiled "I'd like that"
"You know what I'd like?"
"No? What?"
"I'd like you to kiss me now"
"I'd like that too" Meredith grinned reaching her lips up, they held each other closely, tongues finding each other quickly, the kiss got a little more passionate than intended as they gripped onto each others bodies "Uh, well, that was, wow" Meredith whispered, her lips slightly swollen.
"Yeah, wow" Addison smiled biting her lip slightly.
"I hope we never stop doing that" Meredith grinned.
"We won't" Addison laughed.
"Mommy, dance with me" Benjamin said pulling on Meredith's dress.
"I'd love too Ben, come here" she said lifting him up and balancing him on her hip "Your going to get way too big to do this soon" she laughed.
"Maybe one day I'll be able to pick you up!" he exclaimed.
"Maybe" she laughed.
"So, do I get a dance with my daughter in law or not?" Thatcher said approaching Addison.
"I'd love too" Addison smiled taking his hand.
"Ella's with Lexie, she's a great kid, they all are"
"Yeah, they're pretty amazing, they have Mer's genes so I think that's a given"
"You are such a suck up" Meredith laughed as she overheard.
"What? Am I not allowed to pay my wife a compliment?"
"What's a compilnent?" asked Ben.
"How about we go and see Uncle Mark" Meredith smiled "He can tell you what a compliment is"
"Ok" Ben said wriggling out of Meredith's arms and running over to Mark's table.
"Hey there little man" Mark said lifting him onto his lap "How are you?"
"Mommy told me to ask you what a compilnent is"
"A compilnent? Oh, do you mean compliment?"
"That's what I said!" Ben exclaimed.
"Right well, a compliment is saying something nice about someone like, like Mommy that's a pretty dress" he said as Meredith walked over to them.
"Why thank you Mark" she smiled "Addie chose it"
"She's dancing with your Dad" Mark said with a raised eyebrow.
"He wanted to dance with his daughter in law" she smiled softly.
"Uncle Mark what's another compilnent?"
"Compliment Ben" said Meredith.
"Well!?" Ben said impatiently.
"How about, Mommy you look very happy with Mama" said Derek from beside Mark, Meredith looked over at him and smiled softly "Dance with me" Derek said standing up and holding out his hand, Meredith took it and led them onto the dance floor, she wrapped her arms around his neck, his hands resting on her hips.
"I am really sorry Derek" Meredith sighed "I didn't want to hurt you"
"I know" he said softly.
"I don't know how it happened or why I just, I don't know, I just fell in love with her"
"I know"
"I did love you, don't ever think that I didn't"
"I loved you too Mer" he smiled.
"So, have you, found anyone?"
"I uh, I got back with Rose, after you left, we were together for 3 years"
"Oh, wow" Meredith stuttered "Even though she stabbed you with a scalpel?"
"Yeah" Derek laughed.
"Did you love her?"
"No, well yeah but I wasn't in love with her, I think that's why it ended, we just didn't have a connection and she didn't get on with my friends, Mark couldn't stand her, said she was all wrong for me, I don't regret her though, I was happy with her, for a while"
"That's good" Meredith said softly "So nobody now?"
"Not at the minute no"
"You'll find someone, your a catch"
"I know" he grinned.
"I just inflated your ego a little bit didn't I" she laughed.
"Yeah" he nodded "Thanks"
"Sorry to uh, interrupt but Scarlet's hungry" Addison said standing next to them with Scarlet in her arms.
"It's fine" Derek said softly as he pulled away from Meredith, Meredith slowly took Scarlet from Addison's arms.
"Come on baby girl, lets get you fed" Meredith smiled "Thanks for the dance Derek" she said kissing his cheek softly before walking away.
"So…." Addison started nervously, Derek laughed a little and pulled her into him "Dance with me Addie" he smiled, she smiled back and wrapped her arms around him just as Meredith had.
"Does this mean you've forgiven us?"
"Yeah" he sighed "It was a long time ago and you look happy, both of you and those kids, they're pretty cute"
"They'll be little heartbreakers just like there Mom" she laughed.
"Why didn't you, y'know, why did Mer have them all?"
"Do you remember when I went to LA, the first time, before I moved"
"Yeah"
"My intention was to have a baby, but then Naomi ran the tests and it just, it wasn't a possibility so, I probably could have used egg donation, Meredith offered but she was the better option, younger, more fertile than anyone I know" she laughed.
"Well I'm sorry Addie, I know you wanted to have kids"
"I do, they're as much mine as they are hers"
"I know" he smiled softly "You think you'll have anymore?"
"We said we'd talk about it when Scarlet's 2, see where we are with the practice and the other kids"
"I'll have to come and visit"
"I'd like that" Addison smiled "I miss you Derek, you might be in the little box but I still miss you, I miss my friend"
"I miss you too" he said hugging her tightly "Now go and be with your wife"
"Ok" she laughed pulling away from him "I'll see you around Derek"
"See you around" he smiled.
~x~
"As much as I love seeing everyone, I can't wait to go home" Meredith sighed snuggling into Addison's arms that night.
"Back to our LA bubble"
"Exactly" Meredith smiled.
"I'm proud of you y'know"
"What for?" Meredith laughed.
"You were faced with your father and Derek one after the other and you didn't freak out, 10 years ago Meredith would have freaked out"
"I guess you've been a good influence on me" Meredith grinned.
"I guess I have" Addison smiled "I love you honey"
"Love you too, night Addie"
"Night Mer" Addison yawned.
~x~
Not every day was a good day, there were fights but they always made up. No matter how many doors were slammed or insults thrown they always made up because at the end of the day they were a family, a partnership, a marriage.
"I don't regret it" Meredith said softly as they celebrated their 7th wedding anniversary, their 10th anniversary of being together "I don't regret the way we got together, I feel bad about it but, I don't regret it"
"Me neither" Addison said kissing her "I'll never regret us Meredith"
"Ben wants a brother" Meredith smiled "He wants someone to roll around in the mud with"
"Is this your way of saying when Scarlet's two you want another baby?" Addison smirked.
"One more" Meredith said quietly "Just one more and then we're done"
"I love you Mer, thank you for doing this, giving me a family"
"Thank you for loving me" Meredith smiled "I love you, always"
~x~
Falling in love with someone is not always going to be easy. Anger. Tears. Laughter. It's when you want to be together despite it all. That's when you truly love another. I'm sure of it. Anon.
~x~ ~x~ ~x~
IMPORTANT, I NEED HELP!!
Hello my fantastic readers =D Basically my fanfic brain is not really working these days, especially in regards to Meredith/Addison! So from this point on I'm open to requests, if you have any scenarios, anything at all I'd love to hear them!
I'm looking for Meredith/Addison more than anything but I can do some Mer/Mark, I have alot of Addex one-shots in the works but if there's something you really want me to write then go ahead, suggest away! Oh and I am working on a Meredith/Alex fic so i'd be open to writing some one-shots if any of you want them.
Leave me comments on my fics or PM me! If I write something you've prompted the fic will be dedicated to you!!
Thank you all, all my love, Kelly xx