A/N: New story! Not a horror, total lovey-dovey junk. I'm practicing my French, so some will be in it(I mean little things, not like a whole chapter). Here you go!

French Kiss

Chapter 1: Foreign Exchange

The bell rung and Simon found a desk and sat in it. He was in his French class, a class he shared with Alvin. They each needed a language course to receive credit. Theodore was not with them, as he had taken a language course his freshman year.

Simon scoffed at the words on the board. They read: "échange d'étudiants étrangers d'arrive demain." He knew what they said; he was very good at speaking and reading French, unlike Alvin, who only knew one phrase.

The teacher pointed to the board. "Can anyone tell me what the board says?" Simon raised his hand immediately. "Simon?"

He lowered his hand. "It says 'New foreign exchange student arrives tomorrow'."

"Very good, Simon. Bon travail." She said. "Yes we have a new girl coming tomorrow all the way from Paris. Isn't that exciting?"

All the boys started talking at once, about the same thing: French girl. They began calling "dibs".

Simon did not agree. Of all the novels- both fiction and nonfiction- he had read, French girls were cruel and heartless and all they wanted was sex. Simon chuckled. All they ever wanted.

"How 'bout it, Si?" Alvin nudged him. "French girl!"

Simon shook his head. "No thanks, Alvin."

Alvin looked surprised. "Are you gay?" He asked. "It's a French girl we're talking about here."

"Exactly." Simon scoffed.

"Okay," The teacher said. "No more talking. Open your workbooks to page forty-two and begin working."

When the teacher sat down at her desk, Alvin began whispering to Simon. "Seriously, why don't you think this is awesome?"

"Alvin!" The teacher yelled. Alvin sat up in his desk. "Arrêtez de parler!"

Alvin stared blankly back at her. "Uhh…"

"She said shut up." Simon said, not looking up from his workbook. "We'll talk about this later."

Alvin groaned and opened his workbook and began to work.

***

Simon was driving Alvin and his friend, Thom, home from school. Alvin was once again trying to figure out why his brother was not excited for the new girl.

"Seriously? Are you messed up in the head?" Alvin asked.

"French girls are just plain rude, Alvin." Simon responded.

"I like 'em a little feisty." Thom said from the back seat.

Alvin sat back in his seat in the front. "Well, I'm going to ask her out!" He said, folding his arms.

Simon laughed. "Yeah. It won't do you any good, Alvin. You don't know a lick of French."

Alvin was taken aback. "Yes I do!" He pointed to Thom. "He's heard me speak it before!" Thom nodded.

"Sure did." He said. He didn't have French class. "An' he's pretty good!"

Alvin smiled. "Told ya!" He sat back in his chair once more.

"Alright." Simon said. "Say something to me."

Alvin smiled again. "Ma plume est dans la salle de bain." Thom clapped.

Simon sneered. "That doesn't count, Alvin. I don't think that will help you get a date."

"What'd he say?" Thom asked.

"Nothin'!" Alvin smiled. "And what if the girl is not a bitch, then what?"

"All they want is sex." Simon replied. "She'll have you in bed on the first date." He turned to Alvin and Thom. They were glancing at each other and smiling. Simon sighed. "Just forget it."

"You don't want sex?" Thom asked.

Simon was silent. Then he spoke. "Sex is meant for the one you love. I'm keeping it that way until I find someone genuine."

"Like Jeanette?"

Simon's mouth dropped open. "What?" He asked. He turned to his brother. "What makes you think I like Jeanette?"

"Well, you guys always hang out together and write each other notes and stuff." Alvin said.

Simon shook his head. "I don't like her… not like that."

"Whatever you say, Si," Thom said. "But if I were you, I'd ask her out soon. She's definitely into you and if you don't make a move, someone else will."

Simon thought it over. "Okay…" He muttered. He pulled his car into Thom's driveway and Thom exited the car.

"See ya later, guys!" He said, walking up to his house.

Simon put the car into reverse and drove back towards his house. Alvin was silent the whole rest of the ride. Simon was, too, but he was thinking about what Thom had said.

Tomorrow. I'll do it tomorrow, he decided. "Je vais le faire demain." He said aloud.

"What?" Alvin asked.

Simon didn't respond.

***

Well, that's the first chapter. More will come as soon as possible. Sorry if you are French and felt offended by the words said here. It's just… next chapter you'll understand. See ya next time, readers. Oh, and for those of you wondering, Alvin said "My pen is in the bathroom".