The sun rises over a beautiful school resting on an impeccable spread of green with gorgeous gardens dotting its grand landscape. Calming fountains and pools for reflection added a serene feeling to the campus populace.

Inside its stunning corridors a disgruntled young man meanders along, looking for sanctuary, free from the babble and excited chatter of this prestigious school's students. He stumbles along becoming more and more irritated with the rich and entitled fools that he was trying to escape from. He finally came upon an ornate door with a small sign above it; the sign read "Music Room 3". He knew that music room three was in disuse, so he decides to open the door. Suddenly the hall was bathed in light, soft music wafted through the air, and rose petals swirled around him and fell gently on the floor.

"Welcome!" a chorus of handsome young men greeted.

The young man stares blankly at the sextet, his mouth hanging open.

"Well don't just stand there," One of the two red headed twins approached him and smiled. "We welcome all types of guests," the other twin purred with a mischievous smile.

"So please, come in," the first twin put his arm about our disgruntled hero's waist.

The tall blonde boy stepped forward and bowed gracefully, interrupting the twins.

"Welcome to the Ouran High School Host Club, my prince." He swept his arm over his head and bowed once more. The young man supposed that he was their leader. The tall blonde studied him and a wide grin spread across his face.

"You know," he said slowly, "I've never entertained a man before."

The young man grunted, turned, and, proceeded to walk out the door.

A loud yell ripped through the air and the young man turned around just in time to see the blonde lunging at him. He tried to run but he slipped on the slick tiled floor and together they fell to the ground in a crumpled heap. A dark haired boy with glasses approached them and sighed.

"Please stop horsing around Tamaki, you might break something," He sniffed coldly.

The blonde, Tamaki, looked up at the tall youth.

"But Kyoooooyaaaaaa," he whined, "He was trying to leave!"

"So let him," the other boy sighed, he hated when his name was drawn out like that. The disgruntled and now crushed young man agreed with him vehemently. Kyoya stared at the duo and the irritation was clear in his face.

"Do whatever you want Tamaki." He turned and walked away.

Tamaki jumped off the crushed boy and ran after him. "Kyoya! Don't be angry with me!"

The young man, suddenly free, made a mad dash for the door but the twins blocked his exit. They smiled as one twin wrapped his arm around the other's shoulder and the other wrapped his arm around his twin's waist.

"Are you thinking of leaving us?" One twin asked.

"He must be, Hikaru do you see the way he is staring at the door?" The other snickered.

"I think he is looking at you Kaoru," Hikaru grinned.

"Perhaps he would like to come and sit with us?" Kaoru asked drawing the distressed young man close.

"Hell no! I just want to get the fuck out of here! You are a bunch of psychos!"

A small blonde boy holding a rabbit pouted. "He hates us!" He wailed.

"WHAT THE HELL? You have a kid in this insane asylum?!" The young man screamed.

The twins glared at him. "You've upset Honey-sempai," they chorused.

"I don't care!" He screamed as a tall boy came over and calmed Honey down. Tamaki came skipping back at that moment with a concerned look on his face. "Now, now no need to get angry," he soothed.

"I'm out of here!" Shouted the honor student; he had only been looking for peace and quiet. He turned around and began to look for a backdoor when Tamaki lunged once more at him. "No stay!" He slammed into the young man and sent him flying forward. The poor boy knocked into a pedestal, atop of which sat a china blue Renaissance vase. The pedestal rocked forward and everyone watched with bated breath as the young man scrambled out from under Tamaki to try and catch the vase. With an ear splitting crash the vase met the floor. A shower of blue shards fell onto the honor student as he lay on the floor, with sparkling blue pieces in his hands.

"Well," Kyoya stood over him. "You are going to have to pay us back for that vase."

The young boy was unresponsive; he could only stare at the slivers of vase in his hands.

I can't believe this. Damn rich brat,.He thought angrily.

"H…how much?"

"Well let's see," Kyoya paused as he thought for a moment. "It was 8 million yen."

"WHAT!?" he screeched. "I can't afford that!"

"Well what should we do Tamaki?" Kyoya turned to the host king.

The blonde put a hand on his chin and pretended to act thoughtful before grinning widely. "You know the saying, when in Rome do as the Romans do?" He pointed a dramatic finger at the unlucky young man. "From now on you will be the Host Club's dog!"

The twins guffawed. "Milord, your plan is the opposite of that saying!" Kaoru laughed.

"Yeah, if he were to 'do what the Romans do' he would have to host!" Hikaru giggled.

"Just look at him though, he wouldn't get any clients!" the howled together.

The said young man felt his face heat up as he blushed. "I'm not that bad looking!" he pouted.

They stared at him. "Right and Mori-sempai is mister talkative," The twins snorted in synchronicity.

Our hero glared at them. "I bet I would host circles around the two of you."

At his words a strange light appeared in their aureate eyes. "He says he can out-host us Hikaru."

"I didn't say I can I said I would," the young man sneered.

"Well Kaoru I say we have no choice but to take him up on that challenge," Hikaru turned to Tamaki. "Milord?"

"Well," the teen looked hesitant and balked at the twins. "If you two take full responsibility and make him a suitable host then I guess it's okay. Just don't scare the princesses; we are here to make them happy."

Kyoya sighed.This is going to end in disaster, he thought.

"YES!" The twins hollered before lunging at the new host.

"You know, we never caught your name honor student," Kaoru said.

He stared at the twins with a look that clearly said he was not amused. "Are you serious? I'm in your class," he sighed. "It's Fujioka, Haruhi."

"Hitachiin, Kaoru," Grinned one twin.

"Hitachiin, Hikaru," Smiled Haruhi's second captor.

"Yeah I know your names; I'm not as dense as you two."

The twins ignored him and dragged Haruhi away from the others.

"Tamaki, I don't think giving the twins custody of the new host was a good idea," Kyoya said.

Tamaki turned to him. "No? I suppose you're right, I did hand him over to those devilish twins, after all. Oh well." He turned and skipped to his usual couch to await the "princesses".

Meanwhile the twins rifled through boxes in a storage room as Haruhi watched. "What are you guys looking for?" He asked hesitantly.

"A spare uniform, can't have you wearing those rags," Hikaru said.

"Then after that we will call our stylist, we must fix that mop you call hair on your head," Kaoru chimed in.

"Why!?" Haruhi demanded.

"To turn you into a host, duh," Hikaru threw a men's uniform at him. "Put that on."

"Well do you guys mind leaving?"

"Shy?" Hikaru teased. "We'll go but we'll be right outside.

"Fine," Haruhi replied sourly.

The twins marched outside as Haruhi turned to the mirror and began to undress. He stopped when he saw his reflection.

There stood another Haruhi in jeans and a camisole, with two small mounds filling in the small space of her A-cup bra, she smiled at her reflection and tried not to giggle.

"For a bunch of guys whose club is about making women happy, they sure can't see a woman when one is standing in front of them," She told her reflection softly.

But she didn't mind, if she had to host to pay them back she would do it. It may be a little awkward at first, flirting with other girls but pretending to be a guy would make it easier.

She laughed at the ridiculousness of her situation. "Better give them what they want," she told herself as she buttoned up the white dress shirt.

Just as she was pulling on the blazer Kaoru's voice floated into the room.

"Are you done?"

"Yeah, you guys can come back," she answered.

The twins walked in and nodded. "Not bad," Hikaru grinned.

"Now we have got to do something about that hair," Kaoru said with a grin, a strange woman stepping into view.

Haruhi grew nervous. "Ummm, I really hope that's a professional."

Hikaru grinned. "That's of course it is. Kaoru and I design clothes, not hair." The young woman approached Haruhi with a grin. "I can definitely work with this."

She stepped into the room and circled Haruhi, looking over her ragged locks.

"Masters, this is too easy." She smiled leading Haruhi out of the room and to a chair. She sat Haruhi down and turned to the twins. "This will only take a few minutes."

The twins nodded and left. Once they were gone the woman turned to Haruhi and smiled. "Shall we?"

Haruhi nodded slowly, a bit unsure.

The woman smiled. "Don't worry it'll be painless."

20 Minutes Later:

Hikaru and Kaoru came back to see Haruhi. They smiled, pleased at what their stylist had done. She had managed to tame the wild mane that was Haruhi's hair, evening out the messy strands and smoothing it into even layers.

"Perfect!" They cried excitedly before dismissing the stylist.

Kaoru then dragged a strange man into the room. "Oh, what now?" Haruhi groaned. "He is going to give you contacts, we can't have you hosting in those coke bottle glasses," Kaoru explained.

Another 20 Minutes Passed:

Hikaru and Kaoru stared slack jawed at Haruhi. She stood before them, her hair in place her bright brown eyes peeking out from underneath her bangs. She smiled wolfishly. "I look don't I?" They nodded, still too stunned to speak.

"Told you so," she scoffed. "Now how does this host thing work?"

They managed to regain their composure before grinning devilishly at her.

"Sorry, we really can't help you there," Hikaru said.

"Let the games begin," Kaoru laughed and linked his arm with his brother's and they stalked off, leaving Haruhi glaring after them.

"Fucking rich people," she mumbled.