Disclaimer: Only the parodied lyrics are mine.

Notes: I've had this idea for a long time, ever since I randomly started changing the words to "Mama Who Bore Me." And then I tried "The Dark I Know Well," and it just all sank into place after that. So, basically, the characters of Spring Awakening are putting on Spring Awakening on Broadway. Or actors that act just like the characters. Hilarity ensues. If anyone listens to "Forbidden Broadway," I'm modeling it after that, only I'm also parodying the script and not just the lyrics. Be warned, it's a parody on the characters, using their names and everything. I used OBC names when referring to cast members just because the names rhymed well, but I'm not suggesting John Gallagher Jr. is really suicidal or anything.

If the font is centered, the character is singing. I'd suggest listening to the songs while reading the parodied lyrics- I tried to use assonance and consonance as best as I could, but I'd really appreciate feedback on any of the rhymes or rhythms that didn't match.

Revised Notes: I have been going through chapters and tweaking them a bit based on reviewer feedback and my own constantly changing ideas. Sorry for any inconvenient update alerts.

Scene One: Mama, You Bore Me

(The curtains open for a preview showing for the media to reveal…)

Elderly Press Member #1: *removes contacts and switches off hearing aid*

Journalist #1: Whoa, Broadway does porn?

Elderly Press Member #2: *faints*

Moritz (offstage): *runs away to hug his teddy bear*

Frau Bergman (offstage): *sighs* Here goes fourteen years of dance lessons...

(Wendla is in her undergarments, staring in an imaginary mirror, and pretending she's a mime. She focuses on the upper half of her body.)

Wendla (calling): Mama? I have lumps on my body! Do you suppose I have cancer?

(Her mother pretends she's not related to the girl onstage. Humming, Wendla picks up a see-through dress and begins singing to her mother- or maybe that's just the conductor who's waving his finger at her. She waves back with magic fingers.)

Wendla:

Mama, you're sure mean,

Mama, you gave me,

No say in anything-

Like, where is my dad?

Mama, the bleeping.

Mama, I'll dangle

On some floating platform,

Act I, the end.

I lay, then one day,

Doctor comes a'calling.

You light a candle,

Shove me down the road!

And I just lie there cryin'

For them to come and find me.

When Melchi comes,

I am already toast!

Mama Gabor, the

Mama of Melchi,

You "play" in Georg's dreams-

And you call me bad!

Mama, the sleeping

From awkward angles.

I'll sleep in haylofts

with Jonathan.

(Frau Bergman conveniently intrudes at the end of the song.)

Frau Bergman: WENDLA!

Wendla: MAMA! Don't look, I'm half-naked!

Any Teenage Boy Members of Stage Crew: *looks*

Melchior: *looks*

Moritz: *tries to shoot himself with his teddy*

Wendla: Wait! I'm not decent! *starts pulling off her dress*

Frau Bergman: *pulls Mother Schmidt aside* Say, have you got any of those pills on you?

I decided to put the bulk of the conversation in the next chapter, with the reprise. Of course, if reviews or lack thereof tell me this is a flop, there may not even be a next section. But, even if it is the worst thing you've ever heard, tell me in a review so I can improve/stop disgracing the Spring Awakening fanfic section with such junk.