It is very rarely in life that what one has to do coincides with what one wants to do.

But I had to keep reminding myself that what I wanted was my family safe, and therefore this was necessary. No one could pull it off but me, and I was certain that if there was a God, and he had any control over fate or rather coincidence, he created me as I am for only this purpose. My gift of communicating with my hands was deemed useless by myself only a year or two ago but now my entire plan depended on this talent.

I had worked so hard to keep the truth away from my family, to put on the act that would convince them I had actually run away. I needed no more motivation for it than the six years that had contributed to my age of 15. They would be reading my letter that I had left on the kitchen table around about now. I had it memorised and repeated it over in my mind as the plane took off.

I'm gone. Don't look for me. If I want to see any of you I will come back.

I can't live with you, pretending my life is perfect. I need to escape.

And that was my last communication with them for an entire year.

An Hour Earlier...

It was a Nessie and Pack tradition to fight over the last brownie. When I was younger I would always win, since I was spoilt rotten. But then we started to have a competition to see who deserved dibs of the caramel and chocolate fudge desert. We would each go around the camp fire and melodramatically explain why the 1000 calories would make us feel so much better.

I observed as everyone went around that this was the perfect opportunity to have one of those typical teenage spats to try and convince them that I was going through that 'rebellious stage'. Jacob was up before me.

"Well for starters, I have the biggest appetite here. Secondly, I am second in command. And thirdly I have never won the brownie."

A few of the pack snorted with laughter and unlike usual (though I desperately wanted to) I held back.

"My turn," I sighed, "Well first of all my mother named me Renesmee." This brought out a few laughs and I couldn't help but snicker too. "So that gives me the hideous nickname of Nessie, from Scotland. Secondly, I can't be normal like you guys and go to school because I grow up too fast. I can't have ballet lessons, I can't learn guitar, and I can't be a cheerleader. I can't even go out into public just in case someone notices that one day I look six and the next sixteen."

The group grew quiet. So quiet that all I could hear was the camp fire crackling and my heart beating heavily.

"It also seems that I didn't inherit some of my mother's human traits in that I'll never be a mum. I'll also probably never get married seeing as I have so little contact with humans, so that should mean I'm happy about overhearing that Jacob imprinted on me when I was baby..."

Inside my head a voice was saying don't do this but the more rational one knew I had to play the part. I had to prove I didn't want this life so that when I ran away they wouldn't chase me.

"But... no I'm not."

I could feel his shock and pain from beside me, the first probably because he had no idea I knew. The second because I pretended I could never feel the same way and had told him so in front of his pack.

"And my last reason, which probably doesn't compare with the one I just shared, is that basically my only social life is with you guys. And all you do is eat, sleep, talk around fires and turn into ugly, stinky wolves."

I felt so corrupt. It had been so easy for me to spit out so many lies.

"Well it turns out I'm not that hungry. So fetch," I said, standing up from the log I was sitting on and throwing brownie to my right, like old men throw sticks to their dogs in the park. I hopped over the log and began to walk to my car, certain after that monologue no one would come after me. I was wrong. Of course, the only person that would have the guts to stand up to that was my best friend, Leah Clearwater.

"What the hell," she shouted low, latching on to my arm to pull me around. Behind her I could see that Jacob was long gone from the logs. "Where did that come from?"

"What? The Res school doesn't teach you what human body parts are? This is my mouth," I smiled sarcastically, lifting up my middle finger to indicate it.

"And this is my hand!" She quickly lifted up her hand to slap me across the face, but my reflexes were faster than hers. I snatched it and squeezed it tight in my hand, hearing a few bones break. I let go and watched shamefully as she observed her russet hand deformed from my action.

"Don't touch me. Bitch." Leah growled and I knew she had caught my double meaning.

I turned back around to continue to walk to my car. I wanted to run back to my friend, apologise a million times over but for her sake I didn't. I was so distracted that when I did reach it, I hardly notice the tall, bulky figure leaning on the boot. So distracted, that I had even opened the door, wiped back a few tears and chucked my bag inside before I realised. The sound I made in shock was somewhere between a 'huh?' and a 'what?'

"Would you like to explain to me what just happened?" Jacob Black said as he stepped into the moonlight.

"I- I spoke what I felt." A simple, stuttered answer was all I could manage when he was so close to me. I honestly didn't know how he didn't realise that I was in love with him. My heart beat was racing at a million kilometres an hour and I could scarcely breathe when I looked into his eyes.

"Oh, I know what that was. I mean what just happened with Leah. You just broke your best friend's hand."

"Dogs heal fast, right?" He took a step closer towards me and I was almost tempted to give up the act right there. I reminded myself, you are doing this for him. Lying now would save his life later.

"I just don't understand Renesmee."

"Listen, I have changed my mind. You definitely deserve the brownie a lot more than me. I can't imagine how pathetic you feel, you know, being in love with someone that doesn't care about you. But face it Jacob, it would have never have worked out." I was about to step into the car, but realising this was the last time I was going to see him; I did something I probably shouldn't have.

I put one hand on his shoulder (coincidentally and 'accidently' showing him my supposed runaway plans) and reached on my tippy toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. I pulled back by only a few centimetres, just to breathe in his scent and my last memory of him. When I pulled back fully, and dropped my hand, I was convinced I had lingered too long so I added a final insult.

"Thanks for being such a dedicated pup." And I stepped into the car, slammed the door shut, revved the engine and reversed back without even checking if he had moved so that I wouldn't run over his toes. So much preparation had gone into this one moment. And I was alone for the most part of it except for the help from Aunt Alice. Quickly I sped away making sure La Push was far out of sight before I let the tears fall.

Alice was indeed the reason that this whole plan came into being. When she figured that her life with Jasper was under threat, I knew she would do anything to ensure that threat was abolished, including helping her niece become the enemy and running away.

She saw in her visions the Volturi discussing the powers of a new recruit in rendering the Cullens useless and the even greater want for the Cullen family -in particular dad, Alice and mum- to join them. Their plan, that Alice had informed me of first (only because I was the only one with her –shopping- at the time of these visions), was to come to Forks once more and kill everybody in sight until they agreed to come. Somehow, even with mum's power, Alice saw that with this new recruit they would be able to do so. They were able to destroy everyone I loved.

Alice confided in me that in some futures both my mum and dad died fighting to stay in Forks and three other deaths were always fixed in every different vision she saw (except for the one where I try and save the day). One of them -the most distressing to her- was Uncle Jasper's. The other two were Jacob's and my own. While latter didn't bother me that much, it was the former that set my mind into motion.

After she finished telling me this, she took me home, picked up Jasper and drove off. She told me it was my job to save the family now without telling a single soul. Before she left, she promised that she would keep in touch, and let me know when I came up with the right plan. While all this was circulating in my mind, I realised only one thing could save us. And that was someone on the inside. With Alice gone, the Volturi needed to be tricked somehow so the Cullens and the Pack could be informed of their plans. As well as this, information was needed about any new recruits the Volturi had, seeing as if they we were to defeat them; we needed to know the enemy.

Without even a second thought, I instantly deduced it should be me. Only I had a way of not only stopping Aro from reading our thoughts but convincing him we would be on the Volturi's side. I had discovered that if I release somewhat of an explosion of thoughts, when Aro touched my hand to read my mind, I could mask my real thoughts and replace them with the ones I was giving out with the price of my power and strength diminishing quickly. I decided not to tell anyone about my plans, because I knew the family would stop me.

That also led to another dilemma, what cover story was I going to use so that I could run away to the Volturi.

A week later the 'rebel' idea came to mind and only a few hours after continuous planning I received an express package. After thanking the post man, I closed the door and took the parcel up to my room where I opened it. Inside was an A5 note, with do it written on it, and nothing else. I grabbed the package envelope and flipped it over, eyeing the instruction burn everything written on the back.

With a heavy heart I dumped my car kilometres outside LA and set it on fire, destroying my tracks. At LAX I bought my one way ticket to Rome, my mind absorbed with the image of Jacob's face as I left him.

"This is for you," I sighed as the plane took off.