Author's Note: Okay, this is my first time writing anything like ever. So please, when commenting or judging be kind.
'Sit back and relax'-Flashback
'Then close your eyes'- Normal p.o.v
'And you fall asleep'-Mind Link
Prologue
Cosmic Era C.E 123.01.25
Kira P.O.V
"Neh, Athrun", I asked, "Hmm?"
'If you saw me like this now what would you think?'
"Why do you think people fight?" A simple question, the question I never had an answer to no matter how many times I asked myself. Those endless nights, where I would just stare into the darkness of my room, asking myself 'When will this war end? What will I do tomorrow?' In order to protect my friends', is that the true reason to why I fight or is it just a simple excuse I make myself believe to ease the guilt from all the killing I have done to make my conscience more bearable?'
'Compared to back then, I've seen so much death I'm not even sure that there are any reasons for fighting anymore. Everyone ends up losing themselves in battle, their sanity, reasoning, even the strongest and bravest men end up crying in the face of death'
Silence that was all I heard it makes me wonder if he knows what I'm thinking right now. "Athrun," Did he hear my question I wonder. "Were you listeni-"I was stopped by a finger on my lips, and so I wait. It seemed like an eternity until he finally spoke, "To be honest I don't know." Well, that was a bit disappointing, "But, I believe there are many reasons for fighting, to stand for their ideals, fight for the pride of one's nation, to protect their loved ones, or just because they are following someone's order people fight, and kill without mercy. But that's not all, even if all of this didn't exist people would still fight, they are fighting themselves against each other that's how people are they are unable to change without giving something, and that price is war."
'Come to think about it, that discussion with Athrun reminded me about the time when Cagalli and I had that discussion about fighting, Andrew Wadtfel, Desert Tiger, killed in the second Bloody Valentine along with everyone else.'
"Is that so?" I ask him, and so the silence returns. Both of us have nothing to say, so we just look at the stars that blanket the space around us. I fell asleep behind Athrun; both of us were sitting back to back looking out at the glass before us, staring at the endless darkness of space. Athrun turns around to look at me, sleeping, and kisses me, then we both fell asleep. 'Please,' I thought 'let this peace last if only just a little longer.' This thought came from thinking about the battle we were going to fight in a day, one in which would have no comparison unless you were to compare its brutality to the bombing of Junius Seven.
'Seeing everyone die before me that day, Lacus, Cagalli, soldiers from both Zaft and Orb forces, Gilbert Dullindal, Tailia Gladys, even Shinn Asuka, and lastly…Athrun. Everyone died in front of my eyes, justas the fighting ended, when everyone thought it was over the Requiem fired one last time killing everyone on the battlefield; ironically I survived due to my abilities of being the 'Ultimate Coordinator'. Why I asked myself millions and millions of times over and over again as the nightmares plague my every waking moment, asleep or not their deaths changed me and from then on I devoted myself to seclusion while making weapons that would be used to bring peace. Yes, ironic weapons that were used to kill hundreds and thousands in war be used to protect people.
Due to the abilities of being the 'Ultimate Coordinator' I have not aged, nor have I changed since the end of the battle of the Second Blood Valentine War. My appearance still youthful as if I was still eighteen, my skills I have no doubt has not dulled even a bit. As for what I've been doing over the decades, developing weapons, due to my skills as a coordinator I've developed weapons much more advanced than any seen during the war.
How could all that I have said be possible, simple after the battle of the Second Bloody Valentine everyone thought I had died and as I had no desire to change that thought, secluded myself on the moon. Spending fifty years on the moon without any interactions with mankind allowed me to develop a super-computer which I called Veda, and my own home from the remains of the military base that was once knowns as Ptolemeaus Crater 'I refused to even step foot near where Requiem's control room once was thus stayed on the opposite side of the moon' . With the materials I discovered in the remains of the Debris Belt, Ptolemeaus Crater, and even the remains of the colony known as Zaft. Yes, have I told you that due to the constant battles all that remains of Zaft Force Military Base which was once strong enough to fight equally to all of Earth's forces are now only floating pieces of debris and debree in space.
So here I stand before on a bridge before a miniture army of Gundams, if you guessed this already then yes you would be correct. In the past fifty years secluding myself in Veda I built numerous Gundams, to stop the fighting that would inevitably resume in order to protect the peace that my friends and I all wished for. Some I built because I felt lonely and based them on my comrades' and enemies' gundams thinking them as my own children, if you're thinking I've gone insane from the lack of human interaction for such a long time I would not doubt your theory, but constructing these Gundams (I call them Gundams due to habit calling my previous mobile suits that and so gave that name to my creations) allows me some sort of company and for some strange reason you could say that I have developed maternal feelings toward all my creations.
I was interrupted from my thinking by a, "Haro, Haro. Ogenki desu ka? Ogenki desu ka(1)? " Coming towards me was a bouncing magenta colored Haro that I built to remind me of Lacus. I smiled as I caught the bouncing ball, as it flapped its mechanical 'wings' while it sat it my hand, beeping and flashing its eyes, it often made me wonder what Athrun was thinking when he built a machine like this. Though seeing it now brought back all the memories of Lacus and every one of my friends. "Torii," a faint chirp of the mechanical bird Athrun had built for me many years ago came closer, and landed on my shoulders I smiled at both robots, who reminded me of the painful, yet happy memories of the past. I was surprised that Torii survived the blast of the Requiem, along with the Strike Freedom considering how powerful the blast was. Even now as I stand before the Strike Freedom, who stands proud in its glory like it did so many years ago, all of this reminded me of all the lengths I took in order to preserve these memories of mine. However the maintenance Haros I modified, and built helped in repairing and building all the machines I have developed over the decades, thank goodness I didn't design those like the bouncing multicolored nightmares that Lacus had or I'm sure they would've driven me to insanity ages ago.
The reason as to why I haven't tried killing my self over the years despite all that I have said and done was probably the last words I heard Athrun say to me right before the Requiem incarnated both him and his Gundam.
"Live! This war will not end yet, I'm being selfish telling you to continue fighting despite promising I will protect you, but please protect them like you did for your friends..."
And with those words he bound me to this miserable fate. So for fifty years I intervened in the war from the shadows, manipulating the economy by controlling the stock market and cost of weaponry for each side and intervening in minor skirmishes. After fighting for fifty long years, peace has finally come and the war has ended.
Though the memories I experienced from fighting with Strike Freedom has tramatized me enough that I cannot sit in the cockpit of my Gundam without remembering all the battles and horror I've experienced from the war causing me to blackout. Thus I built another Gundam different yet similar to Strike Freedom. As I turn around allowing both machines to float away from me,to stare into the eyes of my partner, Endless Freedom.
I have installed it with a G.N Drive,something I had developed for stealth in order to escape the notice of both Earth Alliance and Zaft forces in the fifty years of my seclusion. In order to participate on larger scale battles without my identity having been discovered, I had to find a solution to blocking long range transmissions. After some tinkering I managed to stabilized two G.N. Drives within Endless Freedom, to allow a wider spread of G.N Particles so that the armies would not be able to identify my Gundamn, or to even give them any chance of capturing me and figuring out that I'm actually Kira Yamato, feared pilot of Strike and Freedom, unidentified pilot of Strike Freedom, War Hero to both Zaft and Earth Forces, who might have the power to tilt the sides of the war and allow complete destruction of either side. Thus stressing the important need of hiding my identity and secluding myself from humanity to keep both the world and myself safe from the power I possess.
However the issue was that only base material strong enough to hold the energy cores was E. Carbon, a material which was a pain to find. However it was worth it when I developed the Trans-Am system, it saved me from the headaches and nausea after being in seed mode. Modeling it after Freedom you can see the unmistaken able resemblance between the two Gundams, it's white and blue paint which my maintainence Haros had a pleasure painting with. It's metallic wings, when unfurled formed a pair of aurora colored wings (Think a pair of wings that are a combination of Endless Waltz and Destiny's wings), along a pair of pistols on located on both sides on the waist of the Gundam, a beam saber, a chain and six guns located on the back of Endless Freedom disguised as wings.
I've recorded all my data about Endless Freedom in Veda, on my personal level;Level Null that is a part of yet not of Veda. In which I made that specific level impossible to access except for me. However my notes on the G.N Drive, G.N Particles and Gundams I have stored in Veda, since I have the feeling that one day the world will need this information and at that time this knowledge will be necessary for the world to change.
However due to Veda being like a diary or as Lacus would call it, I found it disturbing if people could just look into Veda and find everything out about me. So I created firewalls and levels where the higher the number the more importance privacy was required where I place stronger and stronger locks. Especially Level Null where I stored a copy all of my memories of all of my friends, the good and the bad. Looking at Haro and Torii who where both just flying and bouncing around Veda they were reminders to me, in hopes that I never forget, though nevertheless that would be impossible. For it is human nature to forget things no matter how important it is or no matter what they do not want to forget. Thus picking up Haro and Torii making them chirp and beep at me in surprise, I believe that going to such great lengths to do what I'm planning may just be my paranoia or just me being overprotective, but I do not want to risk waking up only to find a pile of scrap metal which use to be some of my most important possessions because of the fact that my maintance Haros could not manage to take care of my home, and machines while I was asleep.
After placing Torii and Haro into a chamber I've specially designed to maintain and keep robots into a hibernate state, I enter the main frame of Veda. It is a tall blue chamber with a sphere and glowing blue circular patterns on it, the flow was glowing blue with the walls surrounded with red data codes and holographic mirrors with green circle symbol on each wall . It was my plan to sleep for while, basically what you would call putting myself in a self-induced coma. You might ask why, considering the fact that I no longer need to go on a journey for the fountain of youth, or for the secret of immortality but for one to live for so long will eventually bring one to the brink of madness, and with my current lifestyle I have no doubts that I will succumb to my emoness if I need to continue to seclude myself from humanity. 'Hm, emoness, is that even a word?' I asked myself. Shaking my head, clearing myself of my thoughts I connected my consciousness to the central mainframe of Veda which allows me to know what's going on in the world while I am asleep. This is also how I kept myself connected to society without ever leaving Veda. In fact staying in Veda kept me more informed that watching the news on twenty different channels and reading all the neighborhood newspapers imagine how much money I save too. As I stepped into the capsule and the doors closed I can't help but remember when I shoved Cagalli into the evacuation shelter back at the destruction of Heliopolis.
Thinking back, I also start to think about what's to come. This world is going to change, another war will occur one which I'm sure that once I awake I will take part in. Thus it'll be necassary that I wake up once every several centuries to eat, I mean heck I may be the ultimate coordinator but I still need food. Along with new clothes, catching up with the current fashion, I mean it'll be pretty hard to do stealth missions if you stick out in a crowd because you thought large pink, poofy hats were common in that time period. Though the money wouldn't be a problem I mean the Haros can manage money for me while I'm asleep, and living for several milleniums probably is bound to earn me a whole chalk load of money.
As I close my eyes into a drugged slumber one which will allow me to sleep but at the same time connect my mind to Veda and allow me to stay awake, my vision starts to blur and soon all I could see was darkness.
---Owari---