A/N: I have no idea where on earth this came from, I just started typing and there it was =/ Anyway, full of the usual Addex cliches and feels a little OOC in some places but, reviews please =D
iam-kelly.
'Ava, I miss Ava, well Rebecca, I miss Rebecca' Alex repeated to himself in his head as he paced back and forth a long the abandoned hallway 'Then why can I only think of Addison, why is the only person I want to see right now Addison, well Dr Montgomery, I lost all rights to her first name when I dumped her on her ass, why the hell did I do that again? Oh yeah, commitment, my stupid freakin' fear of Sunday barbecues and baseballs. She told me to go after Ava, she told me, she said she didn't want me. Then why can't I get her face out of my head? The face she pulled when I shot her down, both times, I hurt her, I hurt the only woman I have ever even imagined having a life with, woah, ok, did I just admit to that? Holy crap. Ok, so I do want the house and the kids but I want it with, I want it with Addison. Do I love her? No, I can't, I can't can I? I can't love her, she's Addison Montgomery, she hates me and she made my life hell, up until the point where it wasn't hell at all, it was heaven, that kiss was heaven, maybe I love her a little bit, I mean, she is Addison Montgomery, what's not to love? She's successful, amazing at what she does, she's gorgeous, she has the most beautiful eyes I think I've ever seen, oh god, I'm noticing her eyes, that's not very Alex of me, Alex notices boobs and legs and she has those, and they're great but why can't I stop thinking about her eyes?! Or her hair, or the way her hair smells. And the fact that I was right. She's missing and, I'm noticing. Holy crap I think I love her'
Alex stopped pacing and continued to walk a long the hallway, bag of coins in hand, he saw Cristina sat looking sad and lost on one of the gurneys.
"I filled this entire bag with coins from my patient's stomach today" he said holding the bag up, she came out of her daze and looked up.
"No kidding."
He looked at her for a second and hopped up onto the gurney next to her.
"I miss Rebecca" he said, 'Liar' he thought to himself.
"I miss Burke"
"Want some money?" he said holding the bag out to her, she let out a little laugh and took the bag, they sat in the quiet for a few moments.
"I lied" he said quietly.
"Huh?"
"I don't miss Rebecca, I miss, I miss Addison"
"Wait?! What!?" Cristina exclaimed.
"I think, I think I'm in love with her"
"In love with her? You think you're in love with the ex She-Shepard?"
"Yeah" he said with an exasperated laugh "Yeah, I do, I am, I am in love with her"
"Me and you, we don't do this, sharing feelings thing, it's not us but seriously?!"
"Seriously" he nodded sadly "I told her I didn't want her, twice, after she kissed me in Joe's the night George's dad died and then again the day before she took that trip to LA, we'd uh, sort of just had sex and she invited me to her hotel room and I blew her off and when she came back she told me I didn't want her and to go after Ava but….she was lying, I could tell, she was lying and I screwed up, I screwed up because she told Callie she wants the guy who barbecues and teaches kids to play catch and, I don't think I am that guy, Ava seemed to think I was but, I don't think I am"
"I think you are" Cristina said sincerely "You've done the manwhoring messing around part but the fact that you know what you did was wrong, the fact that even though she told you she didn't want you you still want her, that shows you've grown up"
"Yeah? And what am I supposed to do about that? She's gone"
"At least you know where she is"
"Sorry" he muttered "I'm unloading all my crap on you and…."
"Alex, it's fine, if I had the chance to talk to Burke, even if it was just to tell him not to talk to me again I would and you have a chance, all you need to do is get on a plane, fight for her Alex, if you really think she's the one, fight"
"You're pretty amazing you know that?"
"Yeah" she grinned.
Alex wrapped an arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek "Eeew, get off" she squirmed, Alex laughed and jumped off the gurney "You'll get through this Yang, you're you."
"I know"
~x~
Addison sat in her living room surrounded by her friends and colleagues, they talked and laughed and drank wine, she watched as Naomi and Sam flirted with each other 'They are so kidding themselves' she thought, Cooper and Pete sat arguing over some basketball team, or baseball, she wasn't really listening, Violet sat in between them watching in amusement. Addison jumped up startled when she heard a knock at her door.
"That must be Dell" she said standing up, she walked over to the door and opened it without even bothering to look through the window, she froze when she came face to face with Alex Karev, he dropped his backpack on the floor and crashed his lips against hers, he pushed her inside slightly and pressed her up against the wall, she took a few seconds to realize what was happening and pushed him off "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" she yelled.
Everyone who was sat in the living room jumped up from their seats and ran out to the hallway.
"What's going on?!" Naomi asked quickly.
"Who are you?!" asked Violet.
"What did he do!?" asked Sam.
"Do you know him?" asked Pete.
"Do we need to kick his ass?" asked Cooper, all questions overlapping slightly.
Addison turned around to face the wall and pressed her forehead against it, she turned back around to face Alex but then turned back to the wall, she repeated this 4 times, each like she was going to say something, her breathing erratic, on the fifth she finally found words.
"What are you doing here Alex?" she all but whispered.
"I'm sorry ok? I'm sorry for what I said to you, for what I did, I'm sorry Addison, I'm so sorry"
"So you're sorry! Ok I get it! You're sorry but what the hell gives you the right to barge into my house and kiss me!" she screeched "How do you even know where I live?!"
"I told the Chief I needed to send you a letter, I can't even remember what I told him it was about but he gave me your address, I got on the first flight out here"
"You can't do this. You can't be here."
"I love you!" he shouted.
"No. You don't. You love Ava" she shouted back.
"Why do you think that?! Why the hell would you think that? I don't love Ava, I told you, she's not Ava anymore and I did not and do not love her, I love you!"
"You don't even know me!"
"Oh don't give me that" he scoffed "Of course I know you Addison!
You are Addison Adrienne Forbes Montgomery, your birthday is November 14th.
You say that your favourite drink is a Martini but you really prefer Long Island Ice Tea.
You have 3 sugars in your coffee in the morning but tell everyone you have don't have any because it sounds healthier.
You prefer the muffins from the cart at the front entrance to the ones in the cafeteria.
You wear your hair pinned up when you're in a bad mood, when it's in a ponytail it means you haven't had time to fix it in the morning which usually means you had a bad day the day before and when it's straight or in curls you're in a good mood.
You hum songs by Bon Jovi in surgery and think nobody can hear you.
You think the only people who like you in Seattle are Callie and Bailey but you're wrong because everyone has gotten to know the real you ever since you left that ass of an ex-husband.
You put the panties on the bulletin board, you did all of your grieving in one day and were back to work bossing me about the next and I never told you how much I respected you for that. And that even though you wanted too you took the high road and didn't kick Meredith's ass into next week, you even managed to be civil around her and not just civil, nice and kind and respectful.
I know a lot about you Addison, I know more than you think I do, but there's also a lot I don't know but this, this I know, I am in love with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want everything that you want. I know I screwed up but everyone should get a chance, I didn't ever have a real chance so please, just take the chance Addison because out of everything that happened in Seattle, maybe I could be the one who makes it a place that makes you happy instead of a place that makes you feel miserable"
Alex was now stood closely in front of Addison, he didn't make any attempt to touch her but he kept his eyes fixed firmly on hers, ignoring the fact that her friends were all staring straight at them.
"Say something" he whispered as he started to get nervous.
"I, I, I don't, I, this is, this is just, why didn't you say all this before!?" she exclaimed hitting his shoulder with an ineffectual fist.
"Because I'm me, I've never really done the love thing before and, I was scared and then Ava told me you wanted the guy who barbecues and plays catch and I've convinced myself for so long that that's not me and she told me I was but it scared me and then I talked to Cristina yesterday and she told me I was too and I mean, if Cristina Yang thinks I'm a good guy then I must be doing something right, I mean, she's Cristina, she doesn't say things like that, ever, so yeah, basically I freaked out at the word commitment but I'm done freaking Addison, I'm ready for this, I want you, I want all of you, always"
"What if we screw this up? I wouldn't want you to move out here Alex, your residency is too important but I can't move back there and be screwed over again, I wasted enough time on Derek and Mark and I just, I can't do that again"
"We'll make mistakes. We'll fight. We'll storm out on each other but come back within minutes because neither of us can walk away from an argument. It won't be easy and I can't promise that everyday will be a good day but I can promise this, from now until the day I die I will love you, comfort you, protect you, I will be there through every bad day and every good day, through every bump in the road, through everything, I promise you that Addison, I will be there"
"Then I guess…." she said taking a step closer to him "I guess that we could, maybe, just, try, for a while"
"Forever" he smiled softly.
"Yeah, forever" she smiled back, he grabbed her by the hips and pulled her in for a kiss "I love you" he mumbled into them.
"I love you too, I do, I love you" she said wrapping her arms tight around his neck, he wrapped his arms tight around her waist and picked her up, she squealed but lifted her legs to wrap them around his waist, she looked down at him and kissed him softly.
"You have no idea how many ways I imagined you doing that" she smiled sheepishly.
"You wanted me to come" he smiled.
"Of course I wanted you to come, I love you Alex, you're an idiot but I love you"
"At least your not calling me Evil Spawn"
"At least your not calling me Satan"
"That's another thing I know, you prefer 'Ruler of all that is Evil' however, I like to call you McHot"
"McHot's my McName? Seriously?!"
"Seriously" he laughed, she slipped down his body and kissed him quickly on the lips.
"When do you have to get back?" she asked quietly.
"Erm, well, you see the thing is, they don't actually know I'm gone"
"ALEX!" Addison shouted hitting him again "You idiot!"
"Cristina knows, she told me to get on the next plane"
"Why did you even tell Cristina?!"
"Because. We were both feeling sorry for ourselves. Burke's gone"
"Gone?!"
"Yep, resigned, he's an ass"
"Yeah, god, she must feel awful"
"She'll get through it, she's Cristina Yang, she just needs to do some cool surgeries and she'll be fine" he shrugged.
"You're getting on the first flight back you do get that right?"
"I don't even get to stay one night?"
"No. Because you are not getting fired under my watch"
"I guess you're right"
"I'm always right" she grinned "I'll call the airport, book you a ticket"
"Are you coming back with me?"
"Not tonight" she replied "I have things to take care of here but, soon"
"Soon" he smiled "I want you to stay with me but…."
"You live with Meredith, I know, it's fine, really"
"Oh, and she's sort of not with Derek anymore, not really"
"YOU WHAT?!" Addison shouted loudly.
"Ok, ow" he said rubbing his ears "They're not together but they're still sleeping together, break up sex apparently, no sleepovers, they think we don't know but, we do" he shrugged.
"Ok, so I'm fixing that when I get back, there is no way on earth I'm letting them spilt up"
"This is why I love you" he laughed.
"What can I say? I want my ex-husband and his ex-mistress to be happy" she smirked "Does it sound as weird out loud as it does in my head?"
"Probably more so" he laughed.
"Right, well, come on, lets go and get your flight booked" she linked her fingers though his and turned to walk back into the living room, she froze when she saw 5 faces smirking back at her.
"Forget we were here did you?" asked Sam.
"You mean to tell us after all the ranting you did about joining the practice you're moving back to Seattle?!" Violet exclaimed.
"Ah well, um, yeah" Addison sighed "Sorry"
"You screw this up and you'll have hell to pay" Naomi said firmly "She's told me all about you, so I don't trust you, not yet anyway, so, you screw this up and I'll hunt you down"
"Got it" Alex laughed.
~x~
"Hey" Addison said into her phone as she pulled up in front of the Grey house a week later.
"Hey" Alex replied.
"So, I'm outside"
"Right well, come on in, the doors open, kitchens straight ahead"
"You are so setting me up, they're all in there aren't they"
"Just Izzie and George, and Cristina but she already knows your coming and then there's Meredith of course, and, and Shepard"
"Wait?! What? I thought they split up"
"They're in denial, sex with no sleepovers is apparently a break up"
"Right" Addison gulped "Well, I'm coming in"
"Ok, I'll be waiting in there"
"Ok" she sighed "Ok, I'll be right in"
"Addison, just remember that I love you ok?"
"I know, I love you too"
"I'll see you soon then"
"Yeah, see you soon"
Addison hung up the phone and sighed heavily, she stepped out of the car and dragged her two suitcases out of the trunk, she locked the car and walked towards the house, she opened the front door slowly, she pulled in the suitcases and quietly closed the door behind her, she took a deep breath and walked towards the kitchen, she could hear the light chatter, she took slow steps, she kept a hold of the suitcases and rolled them behind her, she stepped into the kitchen and stopped still, everyone looked up at her, confusion spreading over their faces, Cristina smirked knowingly, Alex grinned and quickly walked over to her, he crashed his lips against hers and pulled her tight into him, she let her hands wrap around his neck and move up into his hair.
"Welcome home baby" he smiled as they pulled away from each other "I missed you"
"I missed you too" she smiled softly "I really hope you have an empty attic in this place because my stuffs arriving tomorrow and there's kind of a lot of it, I did just pack up a whole house after all" she smirked.
"We'll find the space" he smiled, he kissed her forehead gently "You're here"
"I'm here" she laughed "Naomi said she's got scalpels rusting in her office drawer and she's prepared to drive all the way down here to rearrange your anatomy if you screw up"
"All the more reason not to screw up" he smirked "We kind of need my anatomy" he grinned.
"You have a one track mind Dr Karev" she said poking him hard on the chest.
"Yeah, you" he smiled "I think it might be because I'm kind of in love with you"
"Yeah? I'm kind of in love with you too but I have one thing to do before I officially move in"
"Oh yeah?"
"Uh huh" she nodded, she pulled away from him and turned to face the bemused people behind them, she walked over to Meredith and grabbed her by the wrist, she pulled up a chair next to Derek and shoved her down in it, she reached out and slapped them both on the back of their heads.
"What the…." they both stuttered rubbing their heads in pain.
"You both need to get the hell over whatever you're doing, you love each other, you're having problems, that does not mean you can play pretend break up, you need to talk to each other." she said slowly "She has mommy issues and daddy issues and all kinds of issues, you need to understand that that is why commitment is a big deal for her because all of the relationships she's seen in her life have ended badly" she said to Derek "You need to support her and not rush her into something she is not ready for" she then turned to Meredith "He loves you, he loves you more than he ever loved me, he wants to marry you and build a house with you and have children with you and that scares the crap out of you but you will be ready for it Meredith, you just need to have a little faith, so stop running, just go with it, it's worth it in the long run" she smiled softly "Right" she said turning back to Alex and clapping her hands together "Now that that's done, wanna help me unpack?"
"You go up, first door on the left, I'll be there in 2 minutes"
"Sure" she smiled, she walked over to him and kissed him softly "I love you"
"I love you too"
"Don't be too long ok?"
He leaned in and whispered in her ear "Please be naked when I get there" Addison merely giggled and walked away, dragging her suitcases with her.
"So…." he started once Addison disappeared "Addison's moving in"
"Yeah, we picked up on that" said George.
"That's where I was the other day, when I went AWOL, I was in LA"
"Right" Izzie nodded "Ok then"
"I can talk about it now right?" asked Cristina.
"Yeah, knock yourself out, I owe you"
"Why do you owe Cristina?" Meredith asked curiously.
"Because. She told me to take the chance if I thought Addie was the one and I know she's the one so I took the chance and the chance worked out" he smiled "And it worked pretty damn well"
"This is insane!" Meredith exclaimed.
"It's amazing" Alex grinned "She's amazing. I mean, she wouldn't even officially move in until she told you two to grow a pair, I think that's pretty amazing, considering"
"He has a point" Cristina smirked "She is so my favourite person right now"
"Mine too" Alex smiled "Which is why I'm going to leave you all too talk about us while I go upstairs and prove that too her, I'll be back in 2 hours" he said over his shoulder as he quickly ran out of the room and up the stairs.
"2 hours?! Seriously?!" George exclaimed.
"She wouldn't sleep with him until she got here" said Cristina "She made him get back on a plane after they'd sorted things out, she said she didn't want to be the reason he got fired. So yeah, 2 hours, they've got a lot of making up to do"
"Since when are you friends with Alex?" asked Izzie.
"I'm not" Cristina shrugged.
"Ok then" Izzie snorted.
"Derek? You ok?" Meredith asked slowly as she saw his face still pretty much in the same expression it was in since Addison walked into the kitchen.
"What? Oh um, yeah, yeah I'm fine, I'm good, all good" he stuttered "It's just, um, a lot to take in, I mean, she's my ex-wife, she's moving into your house, she's in love with Karev, and she's hitting us because we're splitting up, it's a lot to take in"
"Yeah" she sighed "It is"
"We should talk" he said quietly.
"Yeah, we should, trailer?"
"Sure" he smiled softly.
They all looked up when they heard a loud moan of Alex's name.
"Can we go now?" he asked quickly.
"Totally" she said standing up and rushing out of the door.
"Joes?" Izzie squeaked as they heard another loud moan.
"Totally" George and Cristina muttered.
~x~
"That was, amazing" Addison gasped as Alex rolled off her, she turned onto her stomach and leaned up to kiss him, she let her head fall onto his chest hearing his heartbeat through his skin.
"It was" he smiled "I love you"
"And I love you" she grinned looking up at him.
They lay together quietly for a few minutes, Alex's fingertips making patterns against Addison's back.
"Their faces were priceless" Alex smirked.
"They were weren't they" she laughed "Do you think they um, heard us?"
"I think they heard you" he laughed.
"Fantastic" she grimaced "I blame you"
"Yeah, well, I think I can live with that" he shrugged "Are you coming to the hospital tomorrow?"
"No, I need to sort out my stuff, I wasn't lying when I said there was a lot y'know"
"I'm taking a sick day to help"
"No Alex I can't…."
"I'm going to do it anyway"
"Ok but, nobody can ever find out, especially Bailey, she'll kick my ass"
"She's not my boss anymore, she's never even been your boss"
"She's Bailey" Addison said simply "I really hope Richard wasn't lying when he said he'd keep my job open for a while"
"It's not even been a month, you haven't been replaced and as far as I know there haven't been any interviews"
"Good" she smiled softly "We can do this right?"
"We can do this" he nodded "Just don't ever leave ok?"
"Ok" she nodded, she turned herself onto her back, wrapped his arm around her shoulder and held her close, her hand made lazy circles against his chest.
"I noticed" he said after a few minutes of a comfortable silence.
"Noticed what?" she yawned.
"That you were missing, I noticed"
She smiled softly, she looked up at him, he bent his head down slightly and they shared a quick kiss, like they were the only lips they would be kissing for the rest of their lives.
~x~ ~x~ ~x~