Disclaimer: Holy crap another chapter! Yes I'm not dead nor is the story. I've said it before; real life tries to keep me from my happy land. Which is the fake one in my brain. I don't make any money on this. This is all because the characters keep talking to me. The only thing I own is my original creations which includes the Swine, Jessie, and the Seca…who are going to be showing up soon.

Enjoy and review because they fuel the crack that I need to live.

Chapter 25

Horses

Horses were not something she was used to, but Jessie was willing and able to try and overcome her fear of the animals if that's what it took. She quickly realized that here in Underland horses were just as different as the cats to their counterparts in her world.

Thackery was at the reins of a small cart that was being pulled by a donkey who reminded her more than a little bit of Eeyore. Jessie's concern that the unstable hare was driving anything was abated somewhat by the fact it looked like the donkey could never be bothered to do more than a trudging stumble. Mally was riding with him and she was assuming Chess was too when he wasn't floating on the breeze.

Tarrant's mount and her own were another issue. Both horses were tall and powerful in their own right. Tarrant introduced her to his stallion first. Duke was a cream color with a dark mane and tail. He also had eyes that were big and brown and nearly manic. His voice was familiar and rough, like he'd smoked a lot of cigarettes (could horses smoke?) and when he did talk his words fell in a weird cadence. "About time you foppy maniac. We should have been on this swine shookum crazy trip hours ago. We've got pigs to kill man!"

Jessie was amazed that Tarrant didn't punch the horse. Truly and honestly surprised. She'd seen him take affront at far less. But instead he looked fondly at the steed and gave him an oddly colored mushroom to eat. "I know old man, I know. But unlike some of our other adventures this one needed a wee bit more planning."

Duke gave him a glare and then begrudgingly ate the mushroom. It seemed to calm him a bit. "Planning schmanning…vengeance and blood! That's what we need, vengeance and blood!" It was then the horse glanced her way. His long face immediately took on a different expression. "Hello there." She had to do a double take because the look in his big brown eyes was nearly suggestive.

"Hello." Jessie nearly held out a hand to shake his hoof…but then realized what she was about to do. Underland was just too strange at times. "My name's Jessie Davies." She gave him a smile, which the horse returned….it was almost a leer.

"My name's Duke. I'm this maniac's battle steed." He gave a nod to the Hatter who was watching their interaction with amusement on his face. "I help him take down the bastards that are out to keep her royal high and mighty from the throne."

"Now Duke, I've told you about being polite about her majesty." The Hatter admonished the horse.

"And I've told you I don't like uppity royals." Duke turned back to Jessie. "But out of all of them she's the least annoying and a looker."

Jessie laughed. Even if it was weird to think a horse was giving you a once over she liked him. There was something awesomely crazy about him…which meant he was completely perfect to be Tarrant's horse. "Well I'm glad Tarrant is obviously in good hooves." She said.

Duke actually grinned at that. "Damn right he is. These same hooves have pounded in a couple hundred of those pig bastards and I plan on keeping that number rising."

Tarrant smiled at that as well and patted the horse affectionately on his neck. "That we shall my friend that we shall." Tarrant gestured at Jessie. "With Underland's Champion at our side we can do no less than our best."

The horse looked back at her once more studying her with the unnerving gaze of his manic eyes. "Ha….I see it now." He said with a rough harrumphing noise. "Yep, that's her." Jessie frowned at him and he just laughed again. "They warned me about you lady. You don't know it but you've got cajones bigger than a Jabberwock's after eating a kilo of upelkuchen."

Jessie's eyes widened at the remark, not really shocked by the words but just…surprised. And Tarrant's got even bigger. "DUKE! You're talking to a lady! My lady specifically. Please try and be a bit more…couth."

The horse turned back the Hatter. "Couth, really?" He asked as if Tarrant really should know better.

Tarrant shook his head. "Let's introduce you to your steed my dear." The Hatter pulled another mushroom from his pocket and shoved it none too gently into Duke's mouth. "Maybe that will calm you're manners a bit."

Tarrant offered her his arm and led her over to a large tan horse with coal black hair and honey colored eyes. He was about the same size as Duke but he held himself with a regal air. At their approach he actually bowed. Tarrant raised a brow at that. "My love this is your steed Esteban. He's from an old and noble blood line that comes from the southern part of Underland."

Esteban pulled himself up from his bow. When he spoke his voice held an accent that reminded Jessie of a Latin Romeo. "My lady, it is my honor to be your transport and guardian during this journey. Such a lovely burden is no burden at all."

Jessie's mouth was hanging open ever so slightly. "Thank you Esteban. I hope I'm not too heavy for you." Oh that was smooth…

Esteban laughed. "Lady your weight will be a pleasure."

Okay she blushed. A horse made her blush. What the hell was going on? Thankfully Tarrant intervened. "Esteban I'm going to give you the same warning I gave Duke. Jessie is a lady and she's my lady as well as the Champion of Underland. I am holding you to your oath as a warrior steed of the White Queen that you will treat her as such." Tarrant patted her hand as if he could tell this was just a bit more odd than anything else she'd encountered.

Esteban immediately became stiffer and more business-like. "I will be a true gentleman Master Hatter. My family honor would allow no less, nor would I. You may trust that upon my oath I shall keep her safe and be diligent in my duties." The horse actually sounded offended.

"Alright then," The Hatter narrowed his eyes at the steed then turned to Jessie. "Esteban is a champion's charger, a great warrior steed…which he has no problem reminding everyone around him." At this she heard the horse make a disgusted snort. "I wouldn't trust you with another…which is something he should remember." He glanced behind him at the horse who gave Tarrant nod of understanding.

Tarrant turned back to Jessie and he saw the little glint of fear in her now grey blue eyes. He placed his hands on her shoulders. "My love you will be safe with him and we will make this journey a success. We will find the Claw and you will use it to destroy that big headed bitch once and for all."

Jessie saw he believed it, but of course he would refuse to believe anything else. She willed herself not to be afraid. Esteban was too smooth an operator to let her fall off him she guessed. "Tarrant such language…" she gave him a grin, her voice full of mock offense.

The Hatter's pink lips turned up in a smile of his own. She was fighting through her own fear, he could see that. It made him proud for certain. "Ah lass, ye've not heard some of the words you make pop into my head. T'would make you blush so hotly to set your face as red as that lovely hair o'yours." He said softly so as to not let the horses hear.

Jessie swatted him on the arm. She didn't need the distraction of pondering his vocabulary at that moment. "Time and place Hatter." Tarrant pouted at her but knew, grudgingly, that she was right.

"Yes of course…well we should be getting on our way. Shall I assist you with your mount?" He asked her gesturing at Esteban.

Jessie looked at the horse who gave a slight shake of "no" to his head. "I think I'll be alright Tarrant. Thank you though. I should learn how to do this on my own right?"

The Hatter looked disappointed but he nodded. "Yes, of course my dear…but if you require assistance please don't hesitate to ask."

"I will, I promise." She gave him a quick peck on the cheek and headed over to her horse, leaving Tarrant to go back to Duke.

Esteban gave her another slight bow. "Thank you lady. Tarrant is a true warrior and one of the best men I know. But he can be…a bit overprotective when it comes to the Champion."

"You could say that." Jessie laughed. "So Esteban, how many champions have you met?"

The horse looked thoughtful. "You would be the fourth my lady. But I can tell you have not ridden before…but let me put you at ease lovely warrior. I will not let you fall and I shall put myself before any blade that comes at you. That is my duty and my honor as a Champions Steed. I will not let you fall without first falling upon that blade myself."

Jessie swallowed the lump in her throat. Latin Romeo shtick aside, Esteban was a beautiful horse and a proud one. And she knew he wasn't lying. He'd give his life for her, just like everyone else would according to Tarrant and Chesser. She reached up and stroked his neck. His coat was like velvet. "I don't want it coming to that Esteban. But I'm glad I have you as my steed." He made a sound like a happy whinney.

She grinned and then glanced next to him. "So…how do I get this saddle on you?"

The horse gave her a look and then let out a heavy sigh. "This might be tougher than I thought…" He muttered.

"For you and me both." Jessie replied.