Farewell

Bella POV

I looked around and smiled softly. It wasn't a smile that said 'I'm happy', or a smile that said 'I'm ready for whatever life throws at me'. It defiantly wasn't the latter. With my luck, it was stupid to challenge faith.

It was a smile of 'whatever will happen next, whether we'll survive or not, I've found peace in my faith.' And I had. Maybe I would have lived a long life if I would have stayed with Victoria, but I wouldn't have lived. Not really, at least. As cliché as it may sound, you don't live until you love.

And I loved.

I loved Alice, Rose, Jasper and Emmett like siblings, as if we had known each other forever.

I loved Carlisle and Esme like the parents I couldn't remember having.

I loved Steve and Jane and all the other people I grew up with in Victoria's school. Sure, we had loved each other before, but we always had to be scared, always asking ourselves if we could fully trust the other person.

And now we knew. We'd die for one another.

And I loved Edward. I had read many books about love since I had met the Cullens, and now I fully understood what they meant. Edward was my love, my life and my sun. He gave me a reason to stand up at mornings, to fall asleep at night with a smile on my face, knowing he'd sit beside me as I slept, humming the song he had composed for me.

So I had thought about death, and that thought had led me to a question that I had never thought of before:

Why would I want to live on?

I had everything I ever wanted, and there was nothing left for me in life that I wanted to reach. I would die anyway, maybe now, maybe in seventy years. But would I be more ready to die in all those years, then I was now? I doubted it.

If I would live through today, then I wanted to live for forever. Like Edward did.

I knew there wasn't a change for me to visit my parents anymore. I knew to much about this world, she would never understand who I was, who I had become. Edward was my reason to live, so I wanted to live the way he did.

And that was an endless discussion between us.

He said he was a monster.

I said he was a miracle.

I said I was a murderer.

He said I was a victim of faith.

I said a vampire was better then an assassin.

He said that a vampire made me an assassin.

I think you get the picture.

Edward pulled me closer to him and I knew it was time. So I looked Edward in the eyes and raised to the tip of my toes to give him one last kiss. When we both pulled back, I was panting and he was smiling.

I smiled back at him.

"Until death?" he whispered, but I shook my head.

"Far beyond it."

Edward POV

I was scared, and I knew my heart almost would have jumped out of my chest, if it weren't for the fact I didn't have a heart.

I was a monster.

I was like a beast, luring innocent creatures in a trap. And Bella was the most innocent of all.

I looked down on the brown-haired beauty who had found comfort in my arms. My cold arms. I still didn't understand her reasons to love me. I was a monster, there was no denying that, but still she held on to me, refusing to let me go, even when I tried to open her eyes and make her see the blood on my hands.

She simply said that it isn't faith that chooses who's the monster.

It's all about the choices you make.

She said I had chosen to live without killing, but I had killed Victoria. And James. And so many other vampires who I didn't even know by name.

Of course they attacked my family and me, but I still was the one who chose.

And I chose to kill them.

But today I would make all those choices right. Bella was standing beside me, and she needed me. She needed my protection. I would fight for her, and, if needed, I would die for her.

I knew she would find happiness again. Someone like her just had to, she deserved it.

Maybe she would find someone else. It would probably be Steve, but as much as I hated him, I couldn't hate that possibility. She would be happy, and he would protect her. I knew he loved her and that he'd never hurt her.

He'd be right for her. Unlike me.

But still I was to selfish to give her up, to selfish to walk away and let her be happy. To selfish to live alone, in pain.

I needed her. Her smell was unlike anything I had ever smelled before, and it was killing me everyday to be so close to her without being able to taste her blood.

She tortured me, without even knowing it.

But I still needed her. I loved my brothers and sisters. I loved my parents.

But all of them were nothing if I hadn't had her. She gave me a reason to live, to smile, to see the beauty of the world through all the pain.

But I knew I had to say goodbye at some point. One day Bella would die, because I couldn't let her live the way I lived.

Not even I was that selfish.

I had never hated Carlisle for doing what he did. I understood why he did it. But still I refused to force my faith onto anyone else.

Even if that one was begging me to do so.

I looked down on my love once again and smiled. I would love her, no matter what would happen. Even if I would die today, I would still love her. Even if I would burn in hell, the thought of her would still be able to make me smile.

I smiled pulled her closer to me. She looked up at me and pushed her lips against mine, even though she had to stand on the tip of her toes to do so.

And then I had to pull back, afraid I would kill her if I wouldn't take a step back.

Steve wouldn't be afraid of that.

Bella was panting, I saw.

But Steve wouldn't be able to kiss her like that either!

I needed to hear her voice one last time.

"Until death?" I asked, but she shook her head.

"Far beyond it." She answered and I smiled.

She smiled back at me, and I felled perfect.

All good things must come to an end.

"Bella!" Steve voice was as irritating as ever. Bella smiled at me one last time, and then she turned around and ran towards her best friend.

Steve POV

I saw Bella and Edward kiss, and then they whispered something to each other. They looked so perfect together, but looks could be deceiving. I knew Bella belonged with me, and I would die to make her see that.

I needed to tell her about how I felt. I had to know for sure that she understood her position, that she knew what her options were.

I couldn't die without her knowing that.

Bella POV

I heard Steve calling my name, so I smiled to Edward and ran of to find my friend, knowing he wouldn't call me away if it wasn't important.

I found a little deeper in the forest, sitting on a fallen tree and looking at a mushroom.

I sat beside him without making a sound.

He looked at me.

"Edward isn't any good for you, do you know that?"

My mouth fell open and I was unable to respond. Not that is was necessary, he just kept on talking.

"He's a vampire. You will grow old, eventually. People are going to think he's your father, or grandfather even. What will you then?

And he's a killer. You know he has killed people. Innocent people.

He doesn't deserve you, Bells."

I felt my hands shake, and for the first time I really wanted to hit the boy beside me.

But apparently, he wasn't finished yet.

"You deserve someone so much better then he is. You are beautiful, Bella, amazing. You can do anything you set your mind on. You are kind and always know exactly what to say to make someone feel better.

You are perfect, and you deserve someone that is perfect. Or at least, more perfect then he is."

And then I had enough. Before I even knew what I was doing, my hand connected with his left cheek. I normally didn't do slaps like that. If I wanted to hurt someone, I'd hit him for real, not a pathetic slap like that.

But any slap given by me was bound to hurt, and I think Steve received the message anyway.

"How dare you?" I hissed. "How dare you say things like that? I am far from perfect. Anyone could do what I can if they were trained the way I was! And if he is a killer, then so am I! Or did you forget that I killed innocent people as well?

Edward is nice, gorgeous and perfect. I love him Steve! And there is nothing you can say to make me forget that. The only monster here are you, for saying things like that about him, while he saved your life!"

After my rant I jumped up and started to walk away, back to Edward, but Steve grabbed my hand and started to pull me back to me. As I started to struggle, he only held on tighter. I was sad because of the things Steve had said, and I wasn't able to focus on the fight very much. So instead of just kicking him between his legs, like I was trained to do in these kind of situations, I just tried to break free from his grip. And then he suddenly said something that made me loose every bit of calmness I had left.

"I love you, Bella!"

I froze, unable to think for a second. And then I kneed him in a very painful spot. He dropped down on the ground in front of me.

"If you really loved me, Steve, then you would have let me to be happy. You want me, there is a difference between desire and love. Next time I hear your lies about Edward, or any of my friends for what that matters, I will hurt you. And trust me, I'll come up with something creative."

Edward POV

When Bella came back, I immediately smiled, like I always did when she was near. But then I saw the unshed tears in her eyes and anger started to take control. I wanted to find Steve, and hurt him, like he hurt her.

But I managed to take control again and walked towards Bella, hugging her close to me. She started to cry.

I started to feel sorry about my previous decision not to eavesdrop on their conversation. I figured Bella would appreciate a little bit of privacy.

And then Steve appeared between the trees, and a new wave of anger threatened to take control of me. Only the feeling of Bella in my arms stopped me.

And then the previous conversation between Bella and Steve entered my head, through the thoughts of the boy that Bella saw as her best friend.

'He's a vampire. He's a killer.'

Sentences that were spoken by him entered my mind. There was one in particular that stung.

'I love you.'

There were things you didn't do. One of those things was telling your best friend you her boyfriend is a monster and that you love her, thought you know that they love each other.

I let go of Bella and started to walk towards Steve. But Bella grabbed my hand and shook her head.

"Wait till the Volturi are gone, alright? We need to be a group when we stand against them."

Even thought someone might be right, that doesn't mean you have to like their idea.

In fact, I hated the idea, but I nodded anyway.

And then Alice got the vision we were all waiting for.

Bella POV

We stood in a group, awaiting the arrival of the Volturi. The seven vampires formed a line before us, even though we all knew they wouldn't be able to protect us if it came to a fight anyway.

I felt Jane's hand in mine and squeezed it softly.

And then they appeared between the trees.

There were only fifteen of them, but I knew that was enough to kill us. Edward had told me about their special powers, and I knew that Jane alone could have taken us all down.

I felt fear rising within me, but I pushed it back down. I was the unofficial leader of our group and if I would show fear, me friends would probably give up all hope.

And then Carlisle walked forward.

"It's nice to see you again, Aro, my friend."

One of the vampires smiled and walked forward as well, followed by two other vampires. They were all men, and I assumed they were Aro, Marcus and Caius, the three 'kings' of the vampire world.

"It's nice to see you again too, Carlisle, thought I did wish it would be under other circumstances."

Carlisle nodded.

"I am sorry about the things that happened here. But I assure you, Aro, that my family hasn't broken any laws. At least, not of the vampire world."

"Then how do you explain the humans that are standing over there, Carlisle? And don't tell me they don't know about us." The vampire that had spoken stood at Aro's right side, but I wasn't sure if it was Marcus or Caius.

Whoever it was, I did not like him.

Carlisle sighed softly and extended his hand towards Aro.

"It's a long story to explain, but please have a look." He said with a small smile.

Aro accepted his hand, and I knew he now knew everything Carlisle knew.

For about a second it was silent. Then Aro spoke again.

"So your… 'son' has fallen in love with a human girl? Are you sure you shouldn't drink human blood instead, I'm starting to worry about your intellect, dear friend."

The Volturi laughed, but Rosalie growled. Emmett immediately laid his hand on her arm to calm her down.

Carlisle smiled shortly, but then he nodded.

"Edward really loves her, and I'm quit happy with my intellect."

I smiled.

Aro sighed softly.

"I understand you aren't the one to blame for this mess, and that the guilty ones are already punished, but you know we can't let all this humans walk free, dear friend."

I looked around me, looking in the faces of my friends, the children I had grown up with. They all gave me a slight nod, as an answer to a question that I had already asked.

I was glad they had managed to hide it from Edward. He wouldn't have been to happy about it.

I knew it was a matter of time before Aro would call me forward, to interrogate me as well.

But the three leaders of the vampire world were whispering amongst themselves, as Carlisle waited patiently on a few feet distance. I knew he was trying very hard not to listen to the conversation that would decide our destiny.

Then Aro took a step back from his brothers and turned towards Carlisle again.

"I'd like to have a word with one of the assassin students before I make up my mind about them."

Carlisle nodded.

"Isabella is the closest thing they have to a leader. But I don't think you'll be able to read her. Edward can't read her mind either."

Aro didn't seem too surprised, he had probably already seen it in Carlisle's head, but his brothers and servants were clearly shocked.

Aro's eyes connected with mine.

"Isabella, dear, please come forward. And take the friend whose hand you hold with you."

Jane was scared, I felt her shake. I smiled at her to calm her down.

"I won't let anything happen to you." I whispered softly to her. I knew I wouldn't be able to keep that promise, not if I had to fight against fifteen vampires, and Jane knew that as well.

But that didn't matter. The girl took a breath and then walked towards the Volturi together. I knew Edward wanted to follow me, but I shook my head towards him. He sighed but nodded.

Once we had reached the Volturi, I still hadn't let go of Jane's hand.

Aro looked at me, with a judging look on his face. I simply looked him straight in the eyes, refusing to be afraid of him.

"Aren't you afraid, human girl?"

"I probably am, somewhere deep inside me." I answered without taking a second to think about it.

He smiled.

"I heard the most amazing stories about you, Isabella. You were an amazing assassin, or so I've heard. But you must have been, since you were almost able to kill Carlisle. So tell me, what kept you from ending his life?"

Again, I didn't need to think about my answer. I had thought about my reasons for a long time.

"It was the most logical thing to do, sparing his life."

Apparently, I had fascinated the vampire.

"Why?"

"I had killed before, but at those moment I had a simple choice: You kill the target, or you get killed yourself, or you run, but in that case someone else will be punished for your mistakes. I refused to let a friend of mine, who was innocent, die for my freedom. So then there were only two options left: Kill or be killed.

So I assumed our lives were just as valuable, so it didn't matter which one of us died. But I am not selfless, so as almost every other creature in the world would do, I chose for my own life.

But if I had killed Carlisle at that exact moment, his family would have killed me. If I didn't kill him, Victoria would kill me. So, I would die anyway. The only choice was whether I wanted to take Carlisle with me or not. And he didn't deserve to be killed. So it was the most logical to do."

Aro looked almost impressed. Then he turned to Jane and held his hand out for hers. She looked at me for a second, asking for permission, and I nodded.

Then she laid her hand in his and froze.

The whole thing took about two seconds, but I was quit sure it felt way longer to Jane. When Aro let her hand go, she looked pale. I released the hand I was still holding, and put my arm around her instead. She leaned against me.

Aro turned to me again and said only one thing. It confused the all of the vampires around him, but the humans understood.

"I accept your proposition." I smiled, but he wasn't done yet.

"There is only one thing that I demand as prize. I cannot let this go without punishing you. So one of you has to die, to make sure her friends don't cross the line again. Or his friends, of course."

I understood the hidden message, mostly because he didn't really try to hide it.

He expected me to volunteer myself.

Not that he was wrong, or anything.

But before I could say anything, Jane turned to me.

"Don't even think about it, Belladonna. You, of all people, have to live on. You were the one to save us all! It's time one of us returns the favour."

I started to object immediately.

"Exactly, I was the one to get you all into this mess. It is only fair that I'm the one to get punished for it!"

"I'll do it."

The voice didn't came from Jane, as I had expected. I slowly turned towards the sound.

Steve was walking forward, his eyes set determined on Aro.

And then it all happened way to fast. Before I even had a chance to object, Aro walked forward as well, meeting Steve in the middle. And as all eyes were on the two there, Aro snapped his neck.

I vaguely remember someone screaming. It probably was Jane, because I knew it wasn't me. I pulled the girl closer to me and hugged her, trying to keep her eyes away from the scene in front of us.

Aro was sucking Steve's blood.

My friends were turning away as well, with fear, sadness and shock in their eyes. But I couldn't turn away.

It should have been me. It should have been me. It should have been me.

The thought kept hunting me, and I knew it would for a while. My brains tried to tell me that it was stupid. I didn't deserve to die anymore then Steve did. But I guess it was my nature to want to die instead of my loved ones.

And Steve was a loved one. Despite the fact that I had fought with him the last time we talked, I loved him. Not like I loved Edward, not like he loved me. But I did love him. Like I loved Emmett and Jasper, and maybe even more then that.

And then Aro took a few steps back.

"I will come by again in, let's say, five years. I expect to see al the students and all of the Cullens here, as vampires. If not, I will not show mercy. Until then."

With those words he disappeared.

Five years later

I stood by the grave of my best friend in the whole world. Even thought Alice, Rose and I loved each other, it wasn't like I loved Steve. He was my friend and my brother. And there was no one to take his place.

"Edward and I are married now." I whispered softly, hoping that Steve could hear me wherever he was.

"I truly love him, you know. I guess that is why I blew up at you during that fight. I didn't mean the things I said, you know. I just got upset because of what you said of him.

I do love you, I know that now. I just keep on wishing that I would have said that back then. Maybe, I'd be in your place then.

But you saved us all. The Cullens changed all of us. Edward hated it, but knew he didn't have a choice.

Yesterday the Volturi came again. They saw all of us were vampires and left again. Well, after they offered us jobs. Don't worry, we all refused. No one could work for your killer.

I visited your parents, like you asked. They had a son after you… disappeared. His name's Max and he's amazing. He looks so much like you. He turned twelve three months ago.

I left them the letter you wrote for them. Both your parents cried, and Max has it now, together with the picture of you and you parents, and a picture of you before you died. He photo shopped it, so now it looks as if your in it together. to make sure he'll never forget his big brother. He keeps it all under his pillow, saying he dreams about you that way every night."

I was silent for a second, and then I whispered again, even more softly then before.

"I miss you, Steve. And I promise I'll never forget you."

Edward's arm hugged me close to him, as he kissed my cheek. I smiled up at him, with tears in my eyes.

When I looked behind me, I realised all my other friends had appeared as well. Jane held my guitar, and she gave it to me.

I took it in my hand, remembering the countless times I had practised playing it with Steve. He said the instrument hated him, I said he hated the instrument. I had even written a song about it once.

But for Steve's funeral I had written another song, way more beautiful. Like he deserved.

And that was the song we would sing today, to remember him.

[verse 1]

When I was scared, you took my hand,

Leading my right through the darkness.

You always said: Life's what you make it,

so you can conquer all of your fear.

[verse 2]

You don't know what you have, until it's gone,

and it is like that with you, forever more.

'cause now you're far away from me.

But I know you are happy somewhere.

[chorus]

I miss you everyday, I miss you every night,

and I can't help but wish that you were here.

Cause whenever things went wrong before,

you were always there to make them right.

[verse 3]

You said you loved me, I said you were wrong.

But now I know you spoke the truth before.

So I just wanted to tell you this one thing:

I love you too, just not the way you did.

[verse 4]

I remember all the times we laughed

and I remember the last time we talked

I was screaming, and hurting you

But please know: I'm sorry too.

[chorus]

[verse 5]

And I still wish I could've gone instead

But I've found peace with your dead.

And know I miss you everyday,

but I'll live on for you, anyway.

[verse 6]

And I hope you found peace wherever you are

And I know you're watching over us

And even though I'll always miss you

I know this was something you needed to do.

[chorus]

The tears streamed down from my eyes as I walked forward and put a little box in a hole I had dug before in front of the grave. After the box was safely in the hole, I threw the sand back on it. I pressed a kiss against my fingertips, put them against his gravestone and walked away.

Dear Bella,

I'm sorry I had to say what I said. I just couldn't stop myself, I had to make sure you knew I loved you in case things went wrong. I wrote this letter to you to tell you that one last time. I know I won't live through this fight, not if you die in it. I can't live without you, Bella. I knew I'd give my life for you, so I decided to write you this letter.

You know I'm not very good with words. Hell, you were the one who had to stay up every night to teach me how to hold a pen right.

Please understand my decision to die. You know you can't blame me, you would've done the same.

Live on, be happy, even if you have to be with Cullen for it. Know I love you and promise me one thing: Don't forget me.

In this envelope is another letter. Please give that one to my family. I wrote some things in it that only I could know, to make sure they believe I wrote it.

I love you, Bella, and wherever I'll go, I always will love you and watch over you.

Love,

Steve

Dear Cookiemom and Superdad,

I'm sorry I had to leave. I swear it wasn't my choice. I know you always said not to step in the car with strangers, but he offered me a ice-cream. You know I always had a week spot for that . (I still can't be serious for a long time). When you read this, I'll probably be dead. There isn't a lot I can say to you beside the fact that I have always loved you and that I would've returned if I had a choice.

Know my childhood was perfect with you guys, you were the most amazing parents a child could ever wish for. It wasn't your fault I disappeared.

After that, my childhood might not have been that great anymore, but I had the best friends a child could wish for.

I just wanted you to know what had happened to me. I cannot give you the details, just know that my death wasn't without use. I died for my friends.

Farewell, mom and dad. I love you.

Yes! I reached the twelve pages!

I want to thank everyone who reviewed, put me on author alert, or story alert or anything like that ; there are to many of you to write down here!

And this was the end of my story. Maybe I'll write some stories about their time in school, I'm not sure yet. Please check my one-shot First time for everything. It's about Bella and Edward's first date.

I hope you liked the story. If you have any ideas for other stories or one-shots about this one, please tell me. I'm also willing to translate stories from English to Dutch, or the other way around.

I already have an idea for the next story, so keep me on author alert!

Goodbye