Whispers from a Diary

Summary: When Kendall comes across James's Diary what big secret does he find? And how will they both deal with the aftermath?

Pairings: James/Kendall

1.

James grabbed his wallet and keys. He made sure to comb his hair before leaving his room. Once done he gave himself a once over, liking what he saw he venture out of his room that he shared with Carlos. He headed towards the door passing Logan on his way. "Hey, where are you going?" he asked.

"I'm heading out to get me a few things, you want anything from the store?"

Logan thought about it. "Um, bring me back some posted notes, Carlos used them all for some random foolishness." James smiled, snapping his fingers at him. "I got you. Be right back." He almost ran over Kendall and Carlos once he was out the door. "Sorry guys."

"Where are you going?" asked Kendall.

"Store, want anything?"

"Pizza!"

"I meant something other then food." he said rolling his eyes. He waved to the guys he made his way down the hallway, turning the corner.

Kendall and Carlos laughed as they enter there apartment. Carlos took a running leap on to the couch, almost falling face first. Logan shook his head, never a dull moment with Carlos. Logan went back to reading, he had a paper due in next weeks class. Actually truth be told, they all had a paper due in next weeks class, but the others pretty much decided to put it off till later.

Kendall went over to the fridge, grabbing himself a water bottle. He took a huge gulp, relishing in the cold taste of water as it rushed down his throat into his stomach.

"Hey Logan, can I borrow your I-pod?" he asked out of the blue. "I'm thinking about heading out for a run and I really could use some music."

"Mines broken remember, because of a certain helmet wearing freak." Logan said not want meaning to point fingers at anyone, but all fingers pretty much pointed to Carlos.

"How was I suppose to know that they break that easily?" he cried from the couch.

"Ok, never mind, I'll use mine. If I can find it." he mutter under his breath.

He went into Carlos and James's room. It was a mess, clothes all over the place. When was the last time they actually took the time to actually clean up. Probably in four days since Katie and Ms. Knight where back in Minnesota taking care of some family business. But that wasn't the important issue at hand. Finding his missing I-pod was his main focus.

Now where was the last place he saw it. He checked Carlos side of the room, pushing grey socks, old sweatshirts and boxers out of the way. He pushed them into a corner, not finding his I-pod anywhere.

He moved over to James's side, looking under his bed, he searched on top of his bed, he moved a sweaty shirt out of his way, body spray-- ah! There was his I-pod, the little sneak. And without any ear buds, great now he was going to have to look for those as well.

Why couldn't they just come attached to the I-pods so that people wouldn't have to worry about loosing them. He continued to look around, he looked through James's nightstand, looking through the top, then checking the bottom. He continued looking through the bottom shelf until he found ear buds right next to James's journal.

Wait, hold the phone. James had a journal?

When did he even start keeping one to begin with? Kendall never saw James writing in anything, not even in class. Most of the time he was daydreaming about lord knows what.

Kendall stood to his full height scratching the back of his head. Really? A journal? He looked again, yep, this was in fact James's since it had his name in bold white letters going across it saying: Property of James Diamond, Keep Your Dirty Hands Off!!

Of course when someone tries to tell Kendall not to do something, it makes him want to do it more, so of course it only made sense for him to pick up James's journal and give it a quick look over.

He flipped through a bit and found nothing interesting, really. He skimmed over several pages of random comments on their progress in LA with Gustavo. The only thing he noticed was that a lot of pages had been torn out here and there. A lot. In the middle of sentences, even.

Weird.

Deciding that there wasn't more to look at, he placed the journal back in the same spot that he found it. He picked up his I-pod and ear buds and left the room.

He had more important things to do then read a unorganized journal.

Running being on of them.

Three days later, as Kendall, Logan and Carlos all found themselves seating in the kitchen area eating Chinese food that they order. Kendall became sort of restless. So he decided to start a conversation. It was better then just hearing the gnawing sounds coming from Carlos.

"Did you know that James has a journal?" he said in between bites of his egg roll.

Logan took a gulp of his ice tea. He frowned, raising an eyebrow slightly. "A journal? You mean a diary?"

"James's a girl?" Carlos asked. He took a huge bite out of some fried chicken. "I mean that would explain why it takes him an hour to get ready in the morning…"

"Guys can have diaries" interrupted Logan.

Carlos gave Logan a once over. "Do you have a diary?"

Logan sat up more in his chair, shifting a little bit. "Well, no, I don't." changing the subject back to James. "When did he start having one?"

Kendall shrugged his shoulders. He swallowed some of his the rest of his egg roll, reaching into to pull out his chicken and Broccoli with white rice. "I have no idea."

"But he has one?" Carlos asked for conformation.

Kendall nodded. He had some food in his mouth. He swallowed. "Yeah, he does."

Carlos cocked his head to the side. "You read his diary."

"What? No…of course not…maybe….I took just a peak."

"Kendall." scolded Logan.

Kendall winced a little when Logan said his name. Leave it to Logan to make him feel kind of guilty.

"What did it say?" asked a eager sounding Carlos.

"Nothing much, just about things in LA, nothing really all that worth reading about."

"Oh then what's the point?" Carlos perkiness deflated.

"Carlos…." Logan said in a warning tone.

"No, but I mean, what's the point of having a diary if there isn't anything juicy to read about. Isn't the whole point about those things is to write about your deepest darkest secrets that you don't want anyone and there mothers to know about?"

"What's the point of keeping a diary if you rip out all of the pages?" Kendall asked.

"He rips out pages?" Logan asked.

"Yeah. Lots of them," Kendall said.

"You mean to use the paper for other stuff, or you mean pages he already wrote on and doesn't like?" Carlos asked.

"Pages that he already wrote on."

Carlos was now very much interested. "Ok, that is weird."

"It is?" asked Logan.

"Yes, I mean if that's the case, then that means that James does have something juicy and he's hiding it."

Logan rolled his eyes. He swallowed a mouth full Chicken lo mein. "James's doesn't have any secrets. He wouldn't have to hide anything. He knows he can talk to us about anything."

"Yeah, but what if he does have a secret and its, like, really big, I'm talking Godzilla big. And he's scared to tell us."

"You think he tore out the pages of the book so he could keep a secret….that doesn't make any sense." said Kendall. He was starting to think, bring this up wasn't a smart move. It was a good thing that James wasn't home or this would be even more awkward.

"Look, you found the diary, you could have read it all," Carlos said. "If he tears out the pages, then no one can read them."

"So what was on them?" Kendall asked.

"That's the secret," Carlos said.

"No kidding," Kendall said.

"If James has a secret," Logan said, "we can't ask him about it."

"Who's asking?" Carlos asked. "I'm going to sneak around behind his back."

"We can't," Kendall said.

"You did, why can't the rest of us?" Carlos asked.

"But I didn't find anything. You might," Kendall said, "and that's not cool."

Carlos rolled his eyes. "Look, he'll never find out. I'll be like OO7, smooth, quick and go completely unnoticed."

"Of course you'll go unnoticed he's not here." said Logan.

"Which makes this plan a hell of a lot easier." Carlos wiped his mouth. He stood up from the table and began to head towards his and James's room.

"If he finds out he'll kill us," Kendall said.

"Okay. If I don't find anything by tomorrow, I'll give up. Twenty-four hours," Carlos said.

"Okay?"

"Okay," Kendall said.

"Do not ask me for help," Logan said.

"Wouldn't even image doing so. Kendall come with me."

Kendall raised his hands up. "I want no part in this either, I kind of regret telling you in the first place."

Carlos glared at them, putting a pout. "Find, I'll do this alone. Like the lone ranger, like Rin Tin Tin, like that guy from that commercial on top of the mountain."

Kendall and Logan stared at him like he had grown to heads. "Are you following any of this?" asked Logan.

"

I learn a long time ago not to really question Carlos, it just hurts the brain cells."

TO BE CONTINUED....