Back in December, I participated in the Twilight Gift Exchange. I wrote this short story for GinnyW_31, who wanted to see a Twi-related retelling of It's A Wonderful Life. This is what I came up with. There are seven chapters, and I will be posting one each day. I hope you enjoy it, and thank you for reading!

Prologue - S(he) Be(lie)ve(d)

Dear Father in Heaven, I'm not a praying man, but if you're up there and you can hear me...show me the way...I'm at the end of my rope, and I...show me the way.

- George Bailey

Edward Cullen sat with his back pressed firmly against the sturdy trunk of an aged spruce tree, his legs folded up against his chest, his arms curled tightly around himself. He began to rock back and forth, the steel of his back knocking against the wood, hoping to drown out the sound of her frantic breaths and the way her voice sounded, hoarse and broken, as the wind carried his name from her lips.

Edward placed his palms on the cold, wet earth, clenching his fingers around the roots of the old spruce as if they somehow held the strength necessary to keep him from going to her. He wanted nothing more than to go to her; to confess his lies, to tell her he wanted to be with her forever. But he would not do that, for he loved her far too much to confine her to his world. He was darkness, and she deserved light.

"Edward," she called, her words rough and pleading. "Please don't leave me. Don't go...I love you. We can-"

He heard her cry as she stumbled and fell, his dead heart twisting in a hundred different directions, each one begging him to follow a path back to her, to make things right while he still could. But every moment that passed and every inch that separated them brought her closer to a normal life.

Edward knew that Bella would move on eventually. He would break her heart now, but one day soon she would love a man with flesh and blood; a man with a heart that beat for her, a heart that hadn't been silenced by death over one hundred years ago. She'd find her soulmate, a man with an actual soul, one that hadn't been stolen from him when he'd had no say in the matter. She'd feel the kiss of a man whose lips were warm with life and love, and who could give her everything that Edward couldn't.

Yes, he was positive he was doing the right thing. Edward would gladly endure this pain a thousand times over if it meant Bella could live a long, happy, human life. Her happiness had been all he ever cared about, and he had selfishly thought he could be the one to provide it. In the end, she'd realize he wasn't worth it, and he would do anything to save her that regret.

"Edward, don't do this. Please, don't do this," she cried, her breath and scent hanging heavily in the humid air. His resistance was fading, and his will wavered with every plea she made. He questioned his intentions every time she called his name.

Edward heard the distinct crack of the tree root as he snapped it, and he wondered what in the hell was taking his family so long. He couldn't stay here with Bella, and he couldn't leave her alone until she was safe. He longed to scream, to break something, to make anything hurt as much as he did. He shook his head, realizing his selfishness once again. In this moment, his pain did not matter; it did not exist. All he could think about was Bella. Once he left the forest, he'd have all the time in the world to mourn her, and that was exactly what he planned to do.

He reached up to cover his ears, to shield himself from the frantic beating of her heart; a sound so familiar to him that he knew he could pinpoint it in a city full of people. It was a rhythm he would never escape, no matter how hard he tried. Like everything else about her, it was permanently ingrained in his memory. Like the beating of a drum, he could feel it pulsing through the air around him, reverberating against his skin.

Edward sobbed, low and desperate, as he buried his face into his thigh to drown everything out. But she was there, too. Her smell permeated the fabric of his pants, and he was nearly dizzy from it. He longed to go to her, to pick her up and hold her close, to bury his face in her hair. He wanted to drop to his knees before her and tell her he'd been a liar and a coward.

As he heard her stumble through the bracken, the pull he felt toward her was too strong. He stood, bits of grass and mud falling from his fingertips, and turned in the direction from which he could hear her breathing. His eyes stung with tears he could not shed, and he gripped his hair tightly, warring with himself. He loved her. He needed to save her. He had to leave her. He wanted to stay. He couldn't do this, he wasn't strong enough-

Edward. A calm, soothing voice lilted clearly through his panic, a tone he would know anywhere. Carlisle's fingertips rested gently on Edward's shoulder, and he looked up into his father's troubled face. Go, he thought, nodding in the direction toward their home. I'll make sure she's safe. I'll stay as long as it takes for someone to find her. Just...go.

Edward needed no further encouragement, for he knew the longer he stood there the more likely he was to stay. He ran on weak legs through trees and moss, and with each step he fought his instinct to turn around and return to Bella. It was the hardest journey he'd ever had to make, even though it was only the beginning.

When he finally reached his family's back yard, he paused for a moment before picking up a large boulder which lay along the perimeter of the clearing. He threw it with all his might, cracking several towering trees with its force. He sighed, knowing that he could level every tree in the Olympia National Forest and that would not bring him as much peace as one touch of Bella's hand.

Edward collapsed then, weary, and loosed an ear splitting scream, wincing as his anguish shook the leaves in the trees surrounding him. He felt a pair of strong arms move across his shoulders, wrapping him in a tight embrace, but he shook them off quickly. He wanted the feel of Bella's arms around him to be the last touch he remembered.

Esme whispered soothing words to her son, running her fingers through his hair carefully as she watched his heart break. "Everything will be okay," she whispered with unneeded words, the palm of her hand coming to rest on the side of his face. Her thumb gently stroked his cheek, where tears would've flowed if he were able to shed them. "I love you, Edward. Everything will be all right."

Edward hummed loudly, attempting to drown out her words of comfort. He didn't deserve them. It was then that he felt the full force of the monster he truly was. A monster who gave a girl his love and then took it away in an instant; a monster who broke her heart. No, there would be no soothing Edward tonight. He wanted to feel everything he'd done. He wanted to keep it with him forever, as a reminder of what he'd wreaked when he'd tried so hard to be something he wasn't. Good. Human.

Edward had made Bella a thousand promises, and he'd broken nearly every one of them within the span of five minutes. But there was one, the most important of them all, that he vowed he would keep.

It would be as if he never existed.