Disclaimer: I do not own X-men: Evolution or the song shown here. They belong to their respected owners and franchises. Seriously I'm just a fan girl. You can find 'Schadenfreude' performed by Avenue Q on YouTube. I would also like to say that this is all merely in good fun, I respect most characters mentioned here. And if I get enough reviews I plan on posting more chapters featuring other songs and characters. Requests are appreciated!

Pyro was depressed. He had once again set fire to the base resulting in a seizing of all his lighters, flamethrowers, and pretty much anything involving fire. Remy and Piotr were out on a mission leaving him with 'the giant, smelly furball' aka Sabertooth. It didn't help that the man in question was staring at him from across the room.

"Quit staring at me," Pyro yelled when he could take it no longer. The moment he did his eyes widened with various images of the torture he was about to be put through. To his surprise though no punishment came. Instead Sabertooth merely walked over and asked, "Kinda jumpy, aren't ya firebug?"

Pyro gulped, not even he was crazy enough to ignore Victor Creed, before saying, "Yeah well Magneto took me lighters. The poor sheilas are probably going crazy without me." For a moment Sabertooth stopped to wonder what kind of guy referred to lighters as 'sheilas'. After dismissing it as a Pyro thing he allowed a broad smile to creep across his face until his fangs showed. "What's so funny," the firebug asked with his usual curiousity-killed-the-cat attitude.

Now all of a sudden music started playing from somewhere and Sabertooth grinned even more.

Sabertooth:
Right now you are down and out and feeling really crappy.

Pyro:
I'll say.

Sabertooth:
And when I see how sad you are
It sort of makes me...
Happy!

Pyro:
Happy?!

Sabertooth:
Come on, Pyro, mutant nature-
Nothing I can do!
It's...
Schadenfreude!
Making me feel glad that I'm not you.

Pyro:
Well that's not very nice, Sabertooth!

Sabertooth:
I didn't say it was nice! But everybody does it!

D'ja ever clap when a waitress falls and drops a tray of glasses?

Pyro:
Yeah...

Sabertooth:
And ain't it fun to watch figure skaters falling on their asses?

Pyro:
I don't watch anything involving ice, mate.

Sabertooth:
Well don'tcha feel all warm and cozy,
Watching people out in the rain!

Pyro:
You bet!

Sabertooth:
That's...

Sabertooth and Pyro:
Schadenfreude!

Sabertooth:
People taking pleasure in your pain!

Pyro:
Oh, Schadenfreude, huh?
What's that, some kinda Nazi word?

Sabertooth:
Yeah! It's German for "happiness at the misfortune of others!"

Pyro:
"Happiness at the misfortune of others." Sounds like our boss.

Watching Shadowcat being told that she just ate chicken

Sabertooth:
Or watching Pietro realize just what he put his dick in!

Pyro:
Being on the elevator when the Blob shouts "Hold the door!"

Sabertooth and Pyro:
"No!!!"
Schadenfreude!

Sabertooth:
"Fuck you kid, that's what stairs are for!"

Pyro:
Ooh, how about...
Jean Grey going from As to Bs?

Sabertooth:
Remy getting STDs!

Pyro:
Waking Xavier from his naps!

Sabertooth:
Watching tourists reading maps!

Pyro:
Stupid Duncan getting tackled!

Sabertooth:
Old man Kelly getting shackled!

Pyro:
Watching Cyclops never reach

Sabertooth and Pyro:
The ending of leader speech!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!

Sabertooth:
The world needs mutants like you and me who've been knocked around by fate.
'Cause when people see us, they don't want to be us,
and that makes them feel great.

Pyro:
Sure!
We provide a vital service to society!

Sabertooth and Pyro:
You and me!
Schadenfreude!
Making the world a better place...
Making the world a better place...
Making the world a better place...
To be!

Sabertooth:
S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!

Needless to say Magneto was both entertained and frightened when he saw this on one of the various security monitors. Luckily though the entertained side won out and by the next day a copy of the video was sitting in a vault owned by none other than Professor Charles Xavier. They might be fighting on different sides but this was too good to pass up.