She had secretly hoped that this argument might end as so many of the others had ended, that they would eventually be able to forgive each other in, the throes of heated passion. But clearly that was not to be. That fact was creating a difficult problem for her; she didn't want to think about him, but as she started to try to put aside the anger she found that her body needed release. If only he he hadn't been such an idiot...!
But she shoved the vexing man out of her mind, and instead of thinking about him she let her mind wander a bit, to other possibilities. She began lazily drifting her hands over her body, stopping to caress her nipples with light touches as they slowly hardened. As her hands moved, her thoughts drifted to someone else. She smiled, thinking of a handsome man with large forearms and a well-muscled chest, a man unafraid of himself and comfortable in his own skin. She felt passion pool at her core as she imagined what it would be like for him to come to her, grab her and strip away all of her training and composure and make her feel like nothing more than a woman.
As she climaxed, she heard her door open. Somewhat worried about who might be walking in on her - it might have been him, coming back to apologize, but what if it wasn't - but before she could even see who it was, something struck her with a vicious punch to the face. Whoever struck her knew what they were doing; she fell back on the bed in her shock, feeling nothing but pain.
She couldn't even identify the person who'd attacked her. By the time she'd recovered, whoever it was had run out of the room.
---
"Gorramit, I'm the captain here, and as such I deserved to know why the hell you punched Inara and gave her a black eye!"
"Wasn't hers! Mine!"
"Sir, maybe you should let me talk to her privately."
"Fine, Zoe. You see what you can get out of her. I'll just... go an' take care of some captainy things."
"So what exactly happened? What is it you're saying that Inara did to you?"
"Stealing! Not hers!"
"I'm not following."
"Was mad at Captain Daddy and needed stress relief, and so she stole what was not hers!"
At this Zoe just stood and stared, puzzled. Then she heard River sniffle a little and whisper something that sounded like "my arm porn," and then everything clicked.
"You gave her a black eye because she was masturbating to thoughts of Jayne?"
"My arm porn!"
"...right."