a.n: Hi(: So, this is just a short little one-shot about my take on Lisbon's childhood and whatnot. My first fic with no dialogue, that completely about Lisbon( except the small bit about Jane in the end i just had to throw in) Ok, so i haven't even read this over, so it may have many mistakes and may be a bit mixed up, but i just wanted to post it :/ I felt like I was writing a bit about myself in this one, idk, i guess i just sometimes think me and Lisbon are similar, except of course she a zillion times awesomer (its a word if i want it to be). :p haha, anyways. here it is. yeah. :)

disclaimer: If i owned this show I would say, forget the olympics, we are having new episodes, but noooooo they just HAD to torture me by going on hiatus. Meanies.

all mistakess my own.

***

She hadn't known how hard it could be, before. She'd gone to good schools, had a pretty average life, there had always been something a bit different about her, but other than that, most things where normal. Parent's that where embarrassing but in a caring kind of way, brothers to fight with on a daily basis but at the end of the day, they looked up to her. A daily routine, hobbies, the usual.

Though her life did not stay in this pattern of normality.

At one point in everyones life, something happens.

Something that changes them forever. For some it happens late in life, but for others, it happens early, sometimes, too early. Maybe its better that way, it prepares you for life, for the frightening, intimidating, uncontrollable world out there. And it sure did that for Teresa Lisbon.

Her eyes had been opened, when she was 12 years old. After her mom died in a car crash, everything went downhill from there.

She changed, everything about her changed. She was no longer the sweet, straight-A student, that always smiled. She gave up on all her hobbies, no more music, no more sports, everything went away. She suddenly fell into a world that had no heart, no compassion, no meaning. She began spiraling downward, trying hard to hold on to the little she had left.

She felt like she was being consumed by a darkness that wouldn't free her, and she didn't want to be freed. She wanted to feel the pain, she felt she deserved it, though nothing was her fault. Then she was pulled out of her own depressive state by her father. Her father, who had become an alcoholic in his attempt to forget all the misery that had entered his life. She could hear him, when he came home, yelling, with a drunken slur in his voice, how everything was terrible, how he had nothing to live for anymore. How he was all alone, well, what did he think she was? Nothing, thats what, he hadn't even noticed his children where there anymore. Except of course when he'd abuse them after coming home from yet another night of endless drinking. She then had to protect her younger brothers from their own father.

When she went to high school she had less time to be home. No, she didn't have many friends, well, pretty much none. She never spoke much, always kept to herself, but she tried to spend as much time away from her father as possible. She'd begun to teach herself to play guitar, it helped her to release the anger she had been storing up over years. One day though, the attempt at keeping away from the place she feared to call home, got her in alot of trouble, or better to say, got her brother in a whole lot of trouble. She'd been away from home one night, out somewhere, trying to forget her tragic life, while at home her father had already gone through his ninth bottle and got so angry her brother ended up in the hospital, because of her failure to protect him. That she never truly forgave herself for this.

Nobody ever knew, on the outside, they seemed like the perfect family. The cute little kids, always playing with each others, scars covered up, looking as happy as can be. Nobody ever would have suspected.

After this had happened, she realized how much hurt there was in the world, how much agony and pain this cold life possessed, but she refused to let herself fall to pieces like when her mother died, instead, she vowed to protect her brothers, what she did not know is that she'd soon be protecting much more than her own family.

She became a cop, putting away people who inflicted pain on others, who added to the misery in the world, she protected those who would be victims to their twisted ways. Now a head agent at the CBI, she knew she had a duty.

We all come across a time that changes who we are forever.

It opens our eyes. After all that had happened , she'd opened her eyes to the world, realized it wasn't all about her, discovered that her destiny was to selflessly protect those who would otherwise be in line for the same pain she'd gone through.

She shook the images that would forever be locked into the back of her mind away as she looked at the man lying on 'his' couch. When she looked into his eyes, she knew she was not alone, she knew that others had gone through even worse, she knew they where both hopelessly damaged. And maybe that was what drew her to him so much, that he understood, not many people have to capability to truly understand the feeling. Her lips tilted upward as she realized she had someone, someone who could relate, someone she could call, her best friend. She wondered what images where going through his head as he lay there, she wished she knew everything about what happened to him, but she knew she'd never want to reveal all that had happened to her either, so, she concluded, maybe for now, the past should stay in the past, but she'd never forget what it forced her to become. Neither of them, would , could, or truly ever wanted to forget what their past had made them.

***

good? bad? awfully terribly DREADFUL? lol im so dramatic. Anywaysss. sorry if it was depressing, im like that ;)

PLEASE review, i beg of you, i never ever ever beg, except for reviews. PLEASEPLEASPLEASEPLEASE. ohh, and du u think i should make another one about Jane's / rest of teams, chilhooods? I could make it into a one-shot collection about that. If it doesn't suck, that is.

really please review. PLEASe. ok ill stop now. - get on knees - PLEASEPLEASEPLEASPLEASe!!!!!!!!!!!!

k im done. pls.

thanks for reading ;)

.andixx.