Donna, the Doctor and a pear.

"Hey doc what's……up?"

Seeing as he was hanging upside down on a beam of the TARDIS I put down the grocery bags I was carrying and prepared myself for another of his endless and quite pointless speeches.

"Well actually Donna because you happen to be standing I am very surprised that you do not know the direction of up. In my case the direction of up would be above me where up normally is and in some cases such as the planet of Miyagino up would actually be down, I'll have to take you there someday. Such an odd planet…" he trailed off in thought.

"Doctor, where should I put these groceries?"

I asked a little louder being annoyed by his constant spurts of unnecessary knowledge and disrupting his apparently deep thoughts, so deep that when I asked he almost fell of the beam, clutching on with his fingers he gave up and somewhat dismounted and fell at the same time.

"Well" he said pulling his suit jacket down

"you can just put those over……Donna."

"Well don't be absurd you can't put the groceries on me I'm not a pack mule you know."

"Donna is that a PEAR!?!?!"

"Oh yes" I said looking at the fairly small beige fruit

"I'm quite fond of them. You know of all the places we've been to Earth is the only planet that seems to have them."

"Donna you can't have that thing in here." He said backing away from the grocery bag.

"And just why not?"

"Th-The ummm… the TARDIS it… you just can't have it in here!"

Skeptical I picked up the fruit and walked over to the console. Nothing.

"Doctor it doesn't…..Doctor?" I spun in a circle he was nowhere to be found.

"DONNA YOU MUST GET THAT OUT OF HERE!" his voice echoed off the walls of the TARDIS.

Looking up he was perched on the topmost railing of the highest stair case.

"How did you---never mind." Pausing I thought it through. "Wait a second. Doctor are you afraid of pears?"

"Of course not Donna why the bloody hell would I be afraid of a pear. I mean it's a simple Rosaceae."

"Fine, come down and touch it then."

His face froze. "Touch it?" he repeated slower.

"Yes, come down from there and touch it. Just one touch, it's not going to hurt you."

"Fine, if you really insist I will." He cautiously slinked down the stairs one set of ten at a time, yet another odd quirk I should note.

A few minutes later he a cleared a miniscule distance considering how fast he normally moves.

"Doctor I haven't got all…well actually I have got all day just please don't take all of it up."

"Ok, ok fine I'm coming." He finished the last three sets of ten left of the stairs and rather awkwardly moved towards the fruit in my hand. He stopped the farthest distance away he could leaning so his torso was almost horizontal and touched the fruit with his fingertips.

"There" he said in a satisfactory tone.

"Oh no, doctor you have to hold it." His mouth dropped open and he assumed the face of a pouty child.

"But Donna you said I only had to touch it." He whined.

"Think fast!" I said chucking the fruit at him. His cat-like reflexes amazed me once again as he caught the fruit with one hand about a foot from his face. He stared intensely at it for a few moments and then shot a look at me. It was one of those guess what I'm about to do looks. The pear was dropped and half way to the ground it received a sharp punt with the tip of his foot, flying out the door that I thought I closed. Dumbfounded I tracked him with my eyes him as he sprinted to the console and shot us through space and time.

"Doctor you realize there's pear juice on the floor."