Grace

By LilyDraken

Naruto looked up expectantly as Hinata walked in and softly closed the door. She looked exhausted. He rushed to her. "How are you?" Hinata gave him a weak smile. He could see the tear tracks still etched in her puffy cheeks. "Have you slept?" She shook her head.

Wordlessly Naruto scooped her into his arms and took her into the bedroom, lying her down. "Are you going to be able to sleep?"

"I think so," she whispered.

"I'll be here if you need me."

"I'll be fine."

Naruto kissed her on the forehead, then walked out, closing the door softly behind him.

Sakura walked through the streets in a fog. She knew she had pushed past her limit with Tenten, but it needed to be done. Rather she had to do it.

It was hard to believe Tenten nearly died. They finally achieved peace, after so long, it made no sense that something like this would-

Shino was dead. Tenten made it, but Shino was did not. He was dead. Shino. Dead.

'Thank God it wasn't Tenten.'

The thought stopped Sakura in her tracks, horrified that she could even think such a thing. 'What the hell is wrong with you!'

But it was the truth, and no matter how much she hated herself for it, she couldn't change it. She knew Kiba and Hinata were going through hell. She knew Naruto was beating himself up over it. Yet she could only feel relief that it wasn't one of her people. She couldn't bear it right now.

'I am a terrible person, thinking such a thing...' Sakura resumed walking, feeling a new level of dejected. 'One of us dies, one of us, the rookie nine, and the only thing I can think is thank God it wasn't one of my friends? Would you even have tried to save Shino? You stupid, selfish, evil-'

Tears were streaming down her cheeks. She angrily wiped them away, to no avail; they just kept coming. She ran off into the trees, not wishing anyone to see her fall apart. In the privacy of the glade, an anguished cry escaped her.

Naruto pushed open the heavy door to the Hokage office, expecting to find Kakashi perched on the window sill. Instead he found Sasuke sitting on the sofa, still banged up from the night before. His penetrating dark Uchiha eyes followed him as he crossed the room. "You look tired," he said.

Naruto shrugged in response. "Long night."

"What can I do?"

"Not much." He sagged into his chair. "I'm suspending your tails and check-ins for the time being. That helps."

Sasuke blinked in acknowledgment.

Long moments passed. There were losses, and then there were losses. It was different, being the one responsible for the lives under your command. An oversight, a glitch, something he missed, it could be any number of a hundred things that he just happened to-

"It wasn't your fault," said Sasuke.

"You don't know that," Naruto whispered.

Sasuke stood up and crossed the distance to the large desk and leaned down, putting himself at eye level with the hokage. "Did you personally go out and attack those ninja?"

"No," Naruto stated, affronted.

"Did you issue orders to have them attacked?"

"Don't be ridiculous!"

Sasuke's unwavering gaze bore into him. "Then follow your own advice."

"You don't know what you're talking about," growled Naruto, "I'm the Hokage; I am responsible for the lives of-"

Sasuke scoffed. "Get off the pedestal, dobe. We're ninja. We all know the risks. We fight. We bleed. We win. We lose. We die. We do what we do because it's who we are. Who we chose to be. So unless you're claiming to suddenly be omniscient, quit blaming yourself."

Naruto leaped up, striking out-

Sasuke's fist hit him square in the face, knocking him back over the desk, onto the chair, and finally into a heap on the floor.

"I was under the impression there were rules about that."

Kakashi. Naruto untangled himself from the chair and stood up to face him. "Yeah, well we all know how well Sasuke does with rules," he muttered sardonically as he rubbed his fractured nose.

"You deserved it," replied Sasuke.

Naruto gave Kakashi a telling look. "I did deserve it." Kakashi remained characteristically inexpressive. "Reports, I know," Naruto sighed. "Sasuke, you'll have to excuse us."

Sasuke nodded and walked out.

Naruto turned his attention to his mentor. "What now?"

Kakashi took a heavy breath, exhaling slowly. Naruto knew it was going to be a long morning.

Head between her knees, Sakura cried for what seemed like hours. Just when she thought she couldn't cry anymore, tears sprang anew, and she cried all over again.

Out of nowhere, strong arms wrapped around her. She tried to shove her assailant away, but her arms and legs were pinned between their chests and she had no leverage. She looked up into dark, probing eyes. "Sai," she sobbed, "go away."

Sai straightened her legs out, took a seat hip-to-hip of her, and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"I'm a wretched, awful person, Sai," she stammered between heaving breaths, "you don't want to have anything to do with me, I'll only break you."

"Why are you a wretched, awful person?" he asked softly, pulling away and staring into her eyes.

"I'm selfish, and mean, and horrible. You told me what I did to Naruto-"

"You immediately tried to fix it-"

"And my only concern was ever Sasuke-"

"He was your teammate-"

"And I never thought about anyone else-"

"That's not the case-"

"Just my own pain-"

"Sakura, you're being-"

"I'm relieved it was Shino and not Tenten." Her breath caught. She said it out loud. She stared at him, waiting for him to judge her, unable to breathe.

Sai paused a moment, watching her intently. "Did you want Shino to die?"

Her eyes widened. "No, of course no-"

"Did you ever wish him any ill will?"

"Never! I would never-"

"Are you sad that he's gone?"

"Yes, of course I am! I-"

"And you're relieved that Tenten is alive?"

"Obviously, or I wouldn't be feeling so guil-"

"Does your relief for Tenten cancel out your sadness about Shino?"

She shook her head, "No..."

Sai shifted his weight, letting his hand drop to her hip. "Sasuke told me you left before dawn to go to the hospital."

"So?"

"I was at the hospital ten minutes ago and Neji said you'd just left."

She sighed, feeling tears burning again, waiting for him to judge her. "Make your point. Just say it."

"My point is that you're exhausted. You're understandably emotional right now and you're so totally exhausted you're berating yourself for thoughts that have no basis and make no sense."

Sakura's brows knitted together in confusion, as though trying to figure out the riddle he had just posed her.

Sai slipped the needle Neji had given him, hidden between his fingers, into her thigh. Her green eyes narrowed into slits before losing focus and finally closing. Sai picked her up and took her home.

The change in the atmosphere was noticeable. Sasuke knew the details and subsequent orders issued last night were jounin only, but all the Leaf-nin knew something was going on. Even the civilians seemed to sense it.

He felt so out of place. He knew more of what was going on than most, but had no orders to do anything about it. He was crawling out of his skin with need of something to do.

"You're having a rough time, aren't you?" Ino asked as she fell in step beside him.

"There are bigger issues than me right now."

"It must be hard wanting to do something and being able to do nothing." Sasuke gave her a warning look. She continued, "At least that's how I feel, so I know how hard it is."

Sasuke stopped and looked at her. She looked like she was searching for something. "Yeah. It sucks."

"I want to fix your face."

"Excuse me?"

Ino lifted her hand up, grazing her fingers against some bruising around his left eye. He involuntarily winced. "Let me fix it. Let me do something for someone so I don't feel so useless and frustrated. I know I can't help Kiba or Hinata right now, and the lesser injuries have already been treated, so I'm left feeling totally helpless and unable to contribute anything of value, and goddamit, I'm fixing that or I'll give you another one to match it!"

Sasuke nodded. It didn't matter so much to him, but if he could offer up his person in order to make someone else feel better about a shitty situation, so be it. It was better than the alternative.

Naruto pushed open the door of the bedroom, hoping to find Hinata still asleep. Instead she was sitting up, staring blankly at the door. "Hey," he said, crawling onto the bed beside her.

She turned her white eyes to him. "Your nose is broken."

He sighed. "Yeah."

"You've been taking care of me," she said quietly, stroking his hair, "let me take care of you."

Naruto curled up on her lap, into her embrace.

A/N: I apologize profusely for my epic tardiness in getting this out. I appreciate your patience and loyalty. I will try to update in a more timely manner. Leave love.

~Lily