The Roommate;

[Viva Las Vegas Style!]

I don't own- (A Durf)

Scattered pairings-

Gratuitous amounts of Awesome- (Prussian style)

Elvis impersonator-

Marriage contracts- (Haw Haw Haw)

The little white chapel-

Violence of the Edo-Kun's and Jakey-Cake kind- (As if it would be anything else)

A magic show and hilarity abound-

- The morning after

The sun peered into the room in bright shots of white blinding light heating up the occupants of the bed. Everything, Gilbert noted, smelled far too much like flowers and perfume. For a moment, after he shook petals out of his white hair, he thought that he had somehow ended up in bed with Francis but the scent of perfume wasn't his.

'No this smells kind of nice kind of like...'

He leaned over the overly soft bed and dry retched. Nothing came out of his mouth but his stomach constricted as though trying. His mouth tasted bitter, the after taste the morning after way too much tequila and whiskey.

'Ah, those were the days...' he thought to himself as he remembered the days of his youth or rather, his days of junior high when he met Antonio Fernandez and Francis Bonnefoy.

He sat up, the thick pink sheets falling onto his lap, and stretched his right arm upward while the scratched his flat belly.

"Where in the world am I?"

A flash of memories flooded back to him, ah yes, he understood, Leah and Edward packing up for a vacation; "You can come but you have to stay out of my way, Bruder."

Ludwig dragging Feliciano Vargas with them who happened to drag his cute but unpleasant older brother Lovino, "Ve~ Lovi will be so lonely without me Doitsu!"

Running into, of all people, Elizabeta!

"Oh great...just fantastic, I have to sit next to you and I don't even have my frying pan on me, how pleasant a trip this will not be."

He remembered being dragged to some show if only a little. Siegfried and Roy, of course because Feliciano and Lovino had wanted to go so badly and of course wherever Feliciano went Ludwig was sure to go. Worse still, because the moment (Gilbert still wasn't entirely sure when Francis and Antonio entered the picture) that Antonio had met Lovino he had taken to following the older Vargas like a love struck lost puppy.

"Hey, potato bastard, if I see any funny business I'm kicking your ass!"

"Oh Lovi, you are so funny."

"H-hey you idiot get your hand off my ass!"

"Usted parece un tomate, Lovi!

He remembered drinking, lots and lots of drinking and Gilbert was pretty sure that Edward had somehow lost his shirt though he couldn't remember why. Somehow Leah had procured two new friends, a boy with green eyes and some Polish girl with an attitude problem.

"Like, your boyfriend is so totally Dobre spojrzenie!"

"Edward's what now?"

"It like totally means Good Looking, Leah! He's almost as handsome as Liet!"

"Please Edward, get off the table!"

"Toris! Toris look! I've got no pants now!"

"Edward please put on your pants! You'll be arrested! Get off the bar!"

"NOOOOOOO!"

"Kodėl aš turiu elgtis su dalykų kaip tai visą laiką? (Why do I have to deal with things like this all of the time?)"

Then there was that one girl...what was her name? Something Italian, Gilbert was sure...Isabelle? Hadn't she ended up in the lap of Francis and hadn't she been kissing Antonio? Lovino had been there-oh yes, Lovino had been incredibly jealous of that.

"Hey, you, puttana, get your hands off of Antonio!"

"Who?"

And then Gilbert had left...what happened after he left? He remembered kind of, running into someone and remembered the smell of flowers and soft skin. Kisses that tasted like far too much vodka that he was reminded of the Russian bastard.

"Let's go into that building."

"Sure, ok."

And then there was darkness.

He threw himself back onto the bed and tried to imagine what could have happened the night before. Whatever had happened, it had to have been fun. The girl had to have been beautiful because anyone he was ever with was beautiful because well...when you were awesome you deserved pretty girls. (This is Gilbert logic so it doesn't have to be taken that seriously)

Gilbert imagined his brain slipping and sliding in his skull, his head ached and somehow his stomach had decided to try to dry heave again. He needed water. He was starving so maybe he would order wurst...or eggs. Eggs were good.

A groan came from his left; someone's arm came up to rest on his chest, long soft fingers curling against the hollow of his throat. Gilbert, shocked by this just shrugged and went back to sleep. He was probably still a little drunk. This would, he suspected later, explain why he hadn't caught the glinting on the girl's finger or the words written in liquid eyeliner across his chest in curly script:

JUST MARRIED

- Lying in the arms of someone you hate

Edward Anthony Mason 'Beilschmidt opened his eyes to the blazing sun. The pillow beneath him was warm and breathing.

'Breathing? Hm...Leah...'

He snuggled into the pillow even more, his hung-over brain taking a moment to catch up. It was five minutes when he realized that the chest was flat...no breasts...

'This is not Leah this is...this is...'

Edward flew back with a shriek and suddenly, when his eyes caught the face of the chest he had been lying on (bare chest BTW) he let out a terrified scream!

"Yaaarh!!!!!!!!!"

Jacob Black was not amused.

- Waking up French!

Francis had never ever been one to sit back during copulation, one could argue that he was usually the reason sex happened in odd places in the first place and in various positions.

Bathroom stalls, restaurant booths, circus tents, police stations, alley ways, flower beds, mall food courts, comedy club stages and museums, parks, yaoi conventions, squad cars (which led to the police station) and...You get the general picture. Francis Bonnefoy was shy of nymphomaniac.

Last night however, he had sat back and enjoyed the rather erotic show. Leaning back on an overly cheesy golden chair in his hotel room, Francis surveyed the bed in front of him with a lecherous grin. What lay there had to have been one of the most beautiful sights he had ever seen.

A Spaniard with glistening golden brown skin, curly brown silken hair and a satisfied smile on his plump dusky rose lips, an Italian boy, equally dark equally handsome but smaller, lither and then the pale white, dark haired beauty sandwiched between them.

"Mes amours..."

Maybe he could join them when they awoke?

He took a sip of his champagne.

"Here is to hoping mes amis."

- The old married couple

Germany and Italy had a good night. They'd seen a show, watched their siblings make fools of themselves. They had a late night dinner they had danced and had drunk only enough to become nicely buzzed.

Here's a little how their night went while getting ready for bed:

"Italia, have you brushed your teeth?"

"Yes. Doitsu, did you remember to set the alarm?"

"Yes Italia."

Both settled into bed. Ludwig leaning back against pillows reading while beside him, Feliciano a crocheted. "Ve~ Doitsu, where are your glasses?"

"I don't need them."

Time lapsed, no words spoken. Finally Feliciano placed his work into the basket next to the bed. Ludwig removed his glasses (ones that Feliciano had shoved onto his face) and closed his book. The lights went off and both readied themselves under the covers.

"Good night Feliciano."

"Good night Ludwig.

...and they wondered why Edward called them an old married couple...

"Ludwig, what times were we supposed to meet everyone for breakfast?" Feliciano asked literally bouncing on the foot of the bed. White and t-shit curling up at the bottom where another white, burgundy, hugged the skin tightly, why he had chosen to wear anything that warm Ludwig wouldn't know.

"In fifteen minutes. Italia, are you positive about Lovino? Are you sure that he left the bar with Antonio and Francis?"

"Yes."

"That poor soul." Ludwig buckled his jeans. "Do you think that Bruder will make it?"

"Which one?" Feliciano shrugged. He tossed a black t-shirt at the German after giving it a critical look.

"Edward." Ludwig pulled the shirt on pulling at the bottom for a second or two to stretch it. "Gilbert well, I will not hold my breath. We might not see him until the weekend is over and then it will be on the arms of Francis."

The two made their way out of the room and towards the elevator talking about the night before of course Ludwig was only half listening. He had a dreadful feeling in the pit of his belly, something about Edward and Gilbert.

Ludwig was the first to admit that out of the three brother's Gilbert was the most trouble however, as much as Berlin liked to believe otherwise, he was a lot like Prussia-their personalities were almost the same. Edward just knew how to hide it better.

"Doitsu! Doitsu!"

"What?"

"So how did they make you disappear, Germany? Was it magic?"

"No. Why did I let you talk me into seeing Siegfried and Roy?"

"Ve~"

The elevator pined loudly, the door whooshed opened. Ludwig's head began to ache, thinking about that particular detail last night.

He hated tigers.

Feliciano led him to the dinning area, a buffet overflowing with tourists in much too loud Hawaiian shirts-which Ludwig couldn't even understand the need to wear...they were in Las Vegas not Hawaii.

"Ludwig! Feliciano! Here sit next to me!"

The two made their way through the crown of loud shirts and snapping photos towards a girl sitting alone at a large table. Her green eyes glittered like gems as she held her digital camera in a vice grip. She giggled.

"Where is everyone?" Ludwig asked taking a seat beside the girl as Feliciano had run off to get them all breakfast.

"Oh you mean the guests of honor?" She giggled again although much more maliciously. "right there coming this way and by the looks of them all with hangovers."

And it was true. A large crowd was coming in, their entire party with...more people involved. First was Edward walking in with a veritable limp holding onto the hand of Leah who was speaking almost rapidly to the short blond beside her that he later identified as Feliks.

Toris was trying and failing to get the attention of Francis who had groped Lovino. Bella Swan, a friend of Feliciano's and Edward's, had a look of utter embarrassment and disbelief. She kept pinching herself for some odd reason while Antonio was patting her back sympathetically. He seemed to be apologizing? Jacob Black was animatedly talking to Roderich Edelstein who looked like he would rather be elsewhere.

Finally the most confusing and odd couple appeared.

"There's the money shot!" Elizabeta took pictures in rapid succession as Gilbert entered the room with a very angry and homicidal looking Natalia Arlovskaya.

"So, something tells me that there is a story here." Ludwig said as Feliciano returned with their breakfast.

The woman merely nodded.

-Part 1 done...Part 2 to Las Vegas Chapter will be updated soon!

Anyone else confused by the Elizabeta not being the girl from the beginning?

Did Jacob and Edward have a hot and heavy moment?

Answer...probably not but that doesn't mean Edo-Kun's isn't going to try to kill Jake anyway.

The threesome was...unusual huh?

The way I see it...the term what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Bella probably agrees.

Francis is also a pervert...

Next part here will focus on Gilbert and the wife he ended up acquiring sometime the night before.

I know initially this was to have mostly Edward and Jacob roommate-ism and it will, just right now the weirdness of this story is focused elsewhere.

If I get a few reviews I might just update faster.

No flames.