Chapter 11 - Confrontations

All of the frustration and agony of the last several days exploded inside me when I saw Rosalie standing beside her ostentatious red sports car. The emotions that had been seething below the surface fought their way out, and I hurtled myself toward her.

"You are not welcome here!" I thundered, closing the distance between us before she could blink.

The ground trembled with the force of my roar, and Rosalie moved into a defensive crouch. She was not one to be frightened easily, and she welcomed a good fight almost as much as Emmett did.

"Oh, get over yourself, Edward," she hissed.

"Get OVER myself?" I couldn't believe she had the nerve to tell me to get over myself. "Get OVER myself? That's rich, Rosalie, especially coming from the most self-centered person I've ever met."

"You don't get it, do you, Edward?" she looked at me incredulously. "Ever since you brought that human into our lives, we've all suffered. All of us. I, for one, am tired of it. I'm not gonna tiptoe around you any more."

"As if you've been so light-footed in the past," I sneered. "You've made no secret of your feelings for Bella."

"What should I feel for her, Edward? She's a human. She's nothing but a menace."

The anger continued to seethe, and I began creeping toward my sister, ready to hurl her into the woods and relieve the tension that had been building inside me for too long.

"She is the woman I love," I replied, keeping my tone even in spite of the anger I felt. "That seems to be enough for everyone else in the family. Can't you see that she makes me happy?"

She laughed sarcastically as she responded, "I don't think 'happy' is a word I'd use to describe what you've been since you met Bella Swan. Tortured, deranged, idiotic, and conflicted maybe. But not happy. And the rest of us have to suffer right along with you."

I straightened up a bit as I considered her words. In a way she was right; my relationship with Bella had been overshadowed by a lot of heartache and pain for all of us. I was sorry for that. But how could my sister speak so harshly about the only person who had touched my soul in almost a hundred years?

Rosalie sniffed and flipped her hair, growing impatient with my little tirade. But I wasn't done. I had to get this last detail out into the open.

"I listened to your message, the one you left when Alice saw Bella jump from the cliff."

Rose stiffened. "Edward, I am sorry about that..."

"Save it, Rose," I snapped. "You were happy when you thought that Bella was dead. I could hear it in your voice. So smug. You delivered the words that had the power to destroy me, and you were happy to do it. No matter how you feel about Bella, how could you do that to me?How am I supposed to look at you after that?"

She didn't have an answer for that one. She knew I was right. "Fine," she spat angrily. "Maybe we shouldn't have come back. I'll get Emmett, and we'll be on our way." She stomped toward the house, but Emmett was already on the porch. Undoubtedly the entire family had been listening in on our little squabble.

With his thoughts, Emmett apologized profusely for Rose. He was torn. He wanted to stay and support me, but his first loyalty was to his mate. "Come on, Rose..." he began, but she cut him off.

"No, Emmett. Edward's right. I can't support him in this crazy 'relationship', so it's better if we go." Then she turned to address me and said, "Edward, Bella's all wrong for you. The sooner you see that, the better off you'll be. She's a human, and you're a vampire. There's no way anything between you can end well."

With that, she stalked into the house to retrieve whatever she had already unloaded so that she and Emmett could be on their way.

I stood there, not knowing whether I was more angry that Rosalie was being so stubborn or sad that she was leaving and our family would remain incomplete. I knew Esme would be upset, and Rose was my sister, after all. I wondered what Carlisle would say when he came home and heard about our argument. Would he blame me for running her off, or would he agree that for the time being maybe it would be better for everyone if Rose wasn't here? I had no idea; I just knew that I couldn't handle dealing with her on top of everything else that was going on.

Emmett stepped off the porch to greet me. I hadn't seen him in so long, and our "hello" would also have to serve as our "goodbye". Maybe Rose was right. My relationship with Bella was tearing our family apart once again.

I couldn't think about that now. Bella was my world, and I had to concentrate on getting her well and keeping her safe. I'd deal with my sister later.

Rose said her goodbyes to everyone besides me, and she and Emmett took off down the drive. I realized I had no idea where they were going.

I shook off the sadness and forced myself to focus on Bella. It would soon be time for me to take my shift by her side, and I cheered at the fact. I went inside and gave Esme a hug and a quick apology before taking off to the hospital. I had been running back and forth, but this time I decided to drive.

When I reached the hospital, I still had about twenty minutes before the beginning of my shift. On my way to the waiting room, I ran into Charlie who was just finishing some paperwork at the desk.

His distaste for me was not disguised in the least, and this was the first time we had been relatively alone since I returned to Forks. Without Bella, Jacob, or Alice nearby, I began to feel a bit nervous. Charlie could never hurt me physically, but I felt an extreme respect for the man. We both loved Bella more than anything else in the world, and we both wanted nothing more than for her to be safe. And I knew that I would have to abide by whatever rules Charlie set. He was Bella's father, and I would never ask her to go against his wishes. So, I had to find a way to get back into his good graces.

He scowled at me, and his thoughts were none too kind. He was still very angry at me for the pain that I had caused Bella when I left. He wanted to be grateful to me for bringing her into the hospital, for helping to save her life. But each positive sentiment was answered with ten memories of Bella during the time that I was gone, so his distaste lingered.

"Sir," I nodded toward him respectfully, trying not to allow the pain of his memories show on my face. "How is she? What are the doctors saying?"

He cleared his throat gruffly. "She's doing well. The doctors are going to start weaning her from the medicine that's keeping her sedated later tonight. She should wake up tomorrow. She's going to be in pain for a while as her injuries heal, but she's not in any danger."

I smiled and huffed a sigh of relief. I hated to imagine Bella in any sort of pain, and I would gladly bear it for her if I could. But the knowledge that she was not in any mortal danger brought me great comfort.

The look on Charlie's face quickly wiped the smile off of mine. "I don't know how you can possibly show your face around here after what you put her through," he spat at me. "And I don't know how she is going to react to your being back. The only reason you are here right now is because you saved her life, and for that I guess I have to be grateful. What do you have to say for yourself?"

I wished I could take him aside and explain everything, tell him the entire truth. But I knew he wasn't ready for that. And how could I explain the depth of my love for Bella, the sorrow I felt for leaving her, the regret I would always carry with me for allowing her to think that she was anything less than the most important thing in my world?

"I wish I could explain, Chief Swan. All I can say is that I made the biggest mistake of my life when I left. I never wanted to hurt Bella; I was trying to protect her."

"Protect her from what? From you? Because the way that I see it, Bella only gets hurt when you're around."

How could I deny that? "I can see how it would appear that way, sir," I replied sheepishly.

Charlie took in a deep breath, and I knew that what he was about to say did not come out easily. "Honestly, I don't know what to make of you. Bella is a smart girl; she doesn't trust or love people easily, but she saw something in you that made her take the risk. So you can't be all bad. But you left her; you deserted her, and I personally don't think you deserve another chance. If I thought she'd ever forgive me, I'd run you out of town so fast it'd make your head spin. But Bella's going to have to be the one to make that decision."

"Thank you, sir," I breathed.

"I wouldn't be thanking me if I were you," he warned. "I'm watching you. If so much as one tear falls from that girl's eye because of you, you're gonna pay. She doesn't deserve to endure one more moment of pain on your account. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, sir. She means the world to me, Chief Swan. I know it's going to take a long time for me to prove that to both of you, but I'll keep trying for as long as it takes."

I hoped he could read the sincerity in my voice and on my face, but he only grunted. His police radio crackled, and he was called away. He didn't say goodbye or shake my hand. He simply nodded briefly and turned and walked away. I knew that he wanted to believe me, but I also knew that the pain of what I had done was still too fresh. I could only assume that Bella felt much the same way.

Before I headed to Bella's room, I stopped in to visit with Carlisle. He was just getting ready to attend to his rounds, so we spoke only briefly. I explained what had happened with Rosalie, how she had refused to change her mind about Bella and how she had accused me of inflicting pain on our entire family. I also added with chagrin that I had told her she wasn't welcome in our family home.

Carlisle nodded sagely and patted me on the back as we turned to head down the corridor to Bella's room. "Edward, right now you need to focus on Bella. She needs you. Don't worry about Rose; she's a big girl. She can be pig-headed, we all certainly know that. She cares about you, and she still struggles with her desire to be human, to raise a family. She sees everything through the filter of her own experience, and she doesn't try very hard to put herself in anyone else's shoes."

I understood where he was coming from; I had been inside Rosalie's thoughts on numerous occasions, and even from that vantage point, I had a difficult time understanding everything. But I wasn't as worried about Rose as I was the rest of the family.

"Carlisle, I'm sorry for what I've put our family through. I know it hasn't been easy, packing up and leaving, moving back, putting up with my temper and mood swings..."

Once again Carlisle smiled his fatherly smile and reassured me. "Edward, it is obvious to all of us that Bella brings you great happiness. Yes, that comes with its fair share of trouble, it seems, but we are willing to take the bad with the good. We all have hope that there is a happy ending for you and Bella, and if there is anything that we can do to give you your happy ending, we are here for you. Love is very seldom easy, but it is worth fighting for."

As Carlisle ducked in to see one of his patients, I was greatly comforted by his words. And just in time, too, because as I rounded the corner to Bella's room, I ran right into Jacob Black.

At once my bleak mood returned, and it was all I could do to control the instincts that told me to rip him to shreds. His reaction was surprisingly similar to mine, and I knew that it was only our mutual love and respect for Bella that kept us from killing each other then and there.

"Watch it, leech," he grumbled, as he tried to calm his breathing and force back the natural tendency to phase into a giant wolf.

I merely growled in response.

We stood opposing one another for a moment, and in that time I could read the guilt in his thoughts. And as I peered more closely, I could see how horrible he looked. He was unshaven, unkempt, and quite hollow-looking. I surmised that he had been beating himself up mentally for causing so much damage, and I decided to use my peek into his psyche to my advantage.

"You shouldn't be here, you know," I goaded him. "It's your fault she's here in the first place. Can't you see that you've done enough damage?"

I knew I was being extremely unkind, but I had to play the game. I still didn't know Bella's feelings for Jacob, and if there was a chance I could run him off, I had to take it. And I wasn't completely unjustified, I told myself. He had hurt Bella. He had proven that young werewolves couldn't be trusted, and there was no way that I could take the chance that he might hurt her again. She would survive this ordeal, but she might not be so lucky the next time young Jacob couldn't control his temper.

His whole body was trembling, and I knew I was playing with fire. But I kept my emotions tightly in check, not allowing him to see the desperation or the motives behind my words.

He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, counting to ten in his head. He assembled his thoughts enough to say through gritted teeth, "No. You're the one who shouldn't be here." He stopped and took a deep breath. "If you hadn't come back, Bella wouldn't have been in any danger in the first place. You broke her heart, drove her to reckless extremes, and then you caused me to phase and hurt her."

I tried not to let his words have any effect on me, and I carefully ironed my smooth facade. "Just like a young werewolf to try to place the blame on someone else. Have you always had trouble accepting the consequences of your actions, Jacob?"

His eyes grew wide, and his hands began to shake again. He let loose a string of curse words that would have made a sailor blush, letting me know in no uncertain terms that there was no love lost for me on his end. I was glad Bella's innocent ears were currently deaf to his obscenities.

I was tempted to keep pushing him, to get him to reveal himself for who he really was. But I knew that if his secret escaped, mine would, too. And that was unacceptable. So, I backed off. I was wasting precious moments with my Bella. But I wanted to leave him with one parting thought: "I'm back for good, Jacob. And I'm not going to allow Bella to be put in another situation that might cause her pain. Enjoy the time you have with her now because that will soon be coming to an end."

As I walked away, Jacob sagged against the wall. Removing my presence also removed the anger, leaving him feeling nothing but guilt and loss. I almost felt sorry for him. I knew how it felt to be in his shoes. I knew all about the self-loathing and the blame. I knew about the conflict between doing what was right and satisfying the desires of the heart.

It was easier not to be angry with Jacob when he wasn't standing right in front of me, his nature at war with mine. I could so easily have been in his place. I almost killed Bella the day I met her, and I had the potential to hurt her every time I took her into my arms.

I breathed deeply and put those thoughts out of my mind as I entered Bella's hospital room. Nothing had changed. She was still lying face down on her hospital bed, her right hand wound up with tubes. Her sutures were covered in bandages, and the smell of antiseptic and cotton permeated the room.

She was sleeping peacefully, her breathing heavy and even, and I took my place in the chair by her side. She would have been self-conscious about having us watch her sleep, but I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I'm pretty sure Jacob felt the same way.

I brushed a strand of hair from her face, and I straightened the sheets to make her more comfortable. I knew she wouldn't notice, but I wanted to do something. I hated the helplessness that I was feeling. I wanted to ease her pain, to avenge her suffering, to hold her and never let her go.

As I watched, her heart monitor began to beep more rapidly, and I could hear the blood moving more quickly through her veins. I knew instantly that she was dreaming, but because she was so heavily sedated, I couldn't tell if she was having a dream or a nightmare. Her face gave nothing away.

In an effort to comfort her, I lifted her hand to my face. I kissed each of her fingertips, and then I pressed her cool hand to my even cooler cheek.

As always, her touch was like an electric shock to my long-dormant heart, but this time her touch held far, far more. The combination of drugs being used to sedate her must have also incapacitated the "glitch" in Bella's brain, because, for once, all of her defenses were down, and I found myself smack dab in the middle of her dream...

A/N: I'm back, everyone! Real life has held me captive for the last two months, but I've been chomping at the bit to get some writing done. Thanks for sticking with me! Please leave me some love and let me know what you think!