I

Marmalade

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who...probably just as well, really...

Disclaimer Take Two: I don't own Mulder and Scully either...they belong to the X-Files.

Prompt: Toast/Marmalade.

A/N: First in my 'Domestic Approach' series, focusing on ten one-word prompts, which all seemed to end up as Alt!TenRose...although I suppose it could be taken as TenRose as well (I'm not being mutually exclusive about this!). Just a little bit of light, fluffy fun...Enjoy!

A/N Take Two: Please remember that all reviews are greatly appreciated so once you've finished reading, have a go at pressing the purdy li'l button at the bottom of the page...Pretty please with an even prettier Time Lord on top?

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The whole kitchen was orange. It was the first thing she noticed; well, how could she not? She was sure it had been cream-coloured the night before.

In the midst of the bright, sticky-sweet chaos sat the Doctor, grinning madly from ear to ear and attempting to lick the offending substance off his nose without much success. It made him look like a manic frog and she giggled loudly at the image, alerting him to her presence.

"This stuff," he said, indicating the marmalade surrounding them. "This stuff is…brilliant, Rose!"

"You know, Doctor," she said, stifling another laugh. "When the advert says 'the future's orange', it doesn't necessarily mean that you should leap into action and redecorate…"

"Well, of course not!" he exclaimed, blinking in surprise. "You and I both know that the future is almost definitely purple!" He looked at her as though she had just sprouted an extra head; seemingly his idea of punishment for forgetting that King Nigel the Fifth of the Trombane Peninsula had a fetish for lilac.

She sighed exasperatedly; for all that he was supposedly human, she was sure he'd be carted off by Mulder and Scully the second he set foot out of the door, especially if he was still wearing marmalade as a fashion accessory. Still, she'd always enjoyed a challenge.

"So…do you wanna tell me why there was an explosion of marmalade in our kitchen, or am I supposed to guess…? 'Cause I've got some interesting theories…"

"Marmalade?" he enquired, clearly fascinated. "Is that what this is? I mean, I was studying the chemical composites and I definitely detected orange and sugar, but all I could think of was those Squippops we had on Nebava 7…Do you remember, Rose?"

"How could I forget? I was luminous green for a week!"

"Yeah…sorry about that…but it did say 'Fit for human consumption' on the tin…"

"Yeah. 'Cause that makes all the difference." She giggled again and he leaned in to kiss her but she shoved him away. "No way, mister! You're all sticky!"

"So?" he pouted, licking a smear of marmalade off his right thumb.

"So I'm not letting you near me until all traces of orange goo have been thoroughly scrubbed off."

"But Rose!" he whined, licking some off his tie. "It tastes so good!"

"Nope." She sighed. "I can't believe I'm actually saying this…but it's me or the marmalade…"

He paused for a moment, chewing his bottom lip slightly as his eyes widened; the picture of innocence. "What about you and the marmalade…?" He dipped his finger into the jar, covering it in orange jam and smeared it down her nose. She folded her arms and looked at him.

"Nice try." He grinned mischievously. "Shower. Now."

"Weeeeelllll, it was worth a try…"And he trudged up the stairs, leaving a trail of orange in the carpet behind him.