16. Heart and Shoulder

Wanna run for you
Would it do any good?
If I flew for you
You'd still be standing

And it's hard watching
'Cause I'm part of you
And it's hard not to
Not to know what I can do

I'm powerless to change your world
I'm powerless to stop the hurt
But I'll give you my heart, give you my shoulder

She thinks that she has a serious problem and it's all his fault. He's turned her into some kind of sex fiend, craving it all the time. She literally can't stop thinking about it and the second they're alone, she can't keep her hands off of him. Okay, so maybe that's not something entirely new, she's always kind of had a problem with that. But to be fair, so has he, which does not help matters because he seems as eager as she is to get her naked at every possible opportunity, not that she's complaining, but maybe they could be a little more discreet about it.

For instance, today after school, they go to her house because doing it in a truck is great and all, but she thinks that if she hits her head on the steering wheel one more time she's going to end up with a concussion. There's already a bruise on her knee from banging it against the stick shift the other day. Of course, Noah did offer to kiss and make it better.

When they enter the house, she barely says hello to her dad, who's working from home today, before pulling Noah up the stairs and calling out that they were going to practice for Regionals and it was imperative that they not be disturbed. Of course, the second the door to her bedroom closes and is locked, he's got her pressed back against it and her hands are tugging at his shirt as his mouth is crashing down on hers.

Like she said, she has a problem and it's his fault.

"We have to be quiet." She whispers to him as they break apart just enough so that he can pull his shirt off.

"We? Don't you mean you?" He smirks at her.

She gives him a look. She doesn't know what he's talking about. "I'm not that loud."

"Yeah, baby, you kind of are." He says sounding totally smug about it.

She frowns, worried because she honestly didn't think she was loud at all. He leans in, pressing his lips to her neck while his hands tug her hips against him so that she can feel him already hard, pressing against her stomach.

"I love that you're loud. It's fucking hot, especially when you're screaming my name." He whispers against her skin.

Closing her eyes, her head falls back against the door. "Well, you have trouble keeping quiet too. You're always cursing and saying highly inappropriate things to me."

She can feel him smirk against her skin as his hands slip beneath her shirt to touch her skin. "Highly inappropriate things? Like what?"

"You know." Distracted by the feel of his hand cupping her breast through her bra, thumbing her nipple.

"I don't. Give me an example." Pulling back to look at her, his eyes dark, full of naked want and lust and need.

Shaking her head. "I can't." Embarrassed.

"Try." He urges.

She flushes. "I don't know." Her eyes skittering away from his insistent gaze. "You… you're always saying how I'm so…" Hot. Wet. Tight. "…that I feel good." She finally says.

He smiles. "That doesn't sound inappropriate." He pulls her away from the door, walking backwards to her bed, pulling her with him. "What else do I say?" He asks, his voice low and suggestive as he sits down on the bed, bringing her to stand between his legs.

"You tell me how much you want me." Her face growing warm because even though she's not really saying it quite the way he says it, whispers it into ear, pants it against her skin, moans it when he comes, she knows that he knows what she's referring to.

His hands slip up her thighs and under her skirt, teasing and light, making her squirm under his touch. "You mean how much I want to fuck you." He says, looking up at her unabashedly.

She feels her panties grow wet instantly and she pushes him back onto the bed, falling on top of him when he takes her with him. Her hair falls around their faces as her lips find his, kissing him deeply, hotly. She feels his hands come up and push her hair back, his mouth eagerly moving beneath hers, pressing his tongue against hers over and over again. And then she feels a vibration against her thigh, it startles her and she pulls back.

"It's just my phone. Ignore it." He mutters, pulling her mouth back to his.

It vibrates again and annoyed with the interruption, she finally digs the phone out of his pocket. "Maybe you should see who it is."

He takes the phone, not bothering to look at it. "I have voicemail, they'll leave a message." He says and the phone stops vibrating. "See." He tosses the phone on the other end of the bed and then rolls her beneath him.

His mouth moves down her neck as his hands move up her thighs, pushing her skirt up higher. She moans, her hands moving down his bare back, over taught muscle and smooth skin, and then sliding into the back pockets of his jeans, cupping his ass. He moans against her neck and then his phone begins to vibrate again and he groans.

Sighing. "Maybe you should answer it. It could be important." She says.

He lifts his head and looks down at her and then kisses her quickly before rolling off of her to grab his phone.

She watches his expression change when he sees the caller ID, growing serious. "Hey." He answers, sitting up.

He listens intently and she can tell something's wrong. "What do you mean?" His back tenses and his grip on the phone tightens. "But you're okay?" He pauses. "And the baby?"

Her heart leaps into her throat. Did something happen to Quinn and the baby? She sits up next to him and he looks over at her briefly, concern marring his features.

"Okay." He says. "Yeah. Yeah, it's not a problem, I'll be right over." He pauses again. "I'll see you in a bit." He ends the call.

She watches him worried, his expression is a mixture of relief and fear and apprehension. She touches his arm and he looks at her.

"She's fine. The baby's fine. She started cramping or something and her parents took her to the hospital, but she's fine. Everything's okay."

She nods in relief. "Good. I'm glad she and the baby are okay. I'm sure she must've been scared."

"Yeah. She's still kind of freaking out so I'm going to go over there…" He looks at her, trailing off. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, I understand. You need to be there for her right now." She's perfected the art of always saying the right thing, no matter how she's feeling inside and right now, that's disappointed.

"It's not okay, it's fucking insane. This situation is so screwed up and it's my fault and I dragged you into it with me."

"You didn't drag me into anything." She slides her hand down his arm, tangling her fingers with his. "I'm here because I want to be."

He leans forward and kisses her softly. "You know I don't fucking deserve you, right?"

She smiles a little. "Well… I'm sure that you'll find a way to make it up to me." She teases suggestively.

He grins. "You can bet on it." He promises and then stands up, walking across the room to where his shirt is lying on the floor.

She watches as he pulls it over his head, tugging it down over his chest before walking back over to her.

"I'll call you later." He tells her and then presses his lips to her forehead before turning to walk out of her room.

She sits there for a while, listening to him say goodbye to her dad before leaving. She hears his truck start up and then as he pulls out of her driveway. Lying back on the bed, she stares up at the ceiling, not entirely sure how she feels.

She understands Noah's sense of responsibility to Quinn, she respects him because of it. She thinks that she may even love him more because he's doing the right thing. He goes with her to her appointments and he's helping to pay for the bills and even though they've already decided to give the baby up, she knows that he loves that baby growing inside Quinn's belly. She knows it and it kills her just a little bit because the fact that there is even a baby at all is proof that at one time Noah had feelings for her, strong feelings, strong enough to cause him sleep with her even though she was his best friend's girl. So, even though she understands his need to be there for her, even supports it, there's still a small selfish part of her that wishes that she didn't have to share him.

She hates feeling this way, so small and petty when it's obvious that Quinn is going through something so much bigger than her insecurities. But she can't help it, it just seemed like Quinn always won in the end, got everything even when she screwed up. She got the sympathy and the friends and the popularity and the boy. Okay, well maybe not the boy, not really, maybe just a part of him.

Sometimes she wishes that there wasn't a baby, that Noah hadn't gotten Quinn pregnant in the first place, but then she's pretty sure that she and Noah wouldn't have gotten together the way they did if that was the case. So, instead she has to accept that there will always be a bond between Quinn and Noah, a bond that will be there even if they don't keep the baby, a bond that she doesn't think she can ever compete with. And she doesn't know how she feels about that.

She lies there for a long time, until she finally pushes the unsettling thoughts out of her head, coming to the conclusion that it doesn't really matter. All that matters is that Noah loves her and he wants to be with her, not Quinn. She doesn't doubt that, not for one second, and she thinks that the fact that they've gone through some difficult things in their short relationship means that they can get through this too. All she needs to do is hang onto that and be there for Noah and things will work out just fine.

She sits up and gets off the bed, straightening her clothes before heading downstairs to help daddy with dinner with a new resolve. Yes, she can do this.

So, her resolve, it doesn't last very long. It's already crumbling and she's trying really hard to be understanding and supportive, but it's hard. It's hard watching him be so protective and attentive to Quinn, more than he's ever been. She knows it's because of the scare that Quinn had a couple days ago, but still she can't help but feel like suddenly there was a third person in their relationship. Or maybe, there always has been, but she's been too blind and naïve to see it until now.

During glee rehearsal, he suggests that Quinn have less strenuous choreography because she's so close to her due date and then he insists on her resting between songs even though she keeps telling him she's fine. For a brief second, as she watches him lead the other girl to one of the seats in the auditorium, she feels this pang of something familiar. She thinks it's jealousy. She supposes that it isn't a totally unfamiliar feeling for her, especially when it comes to Quinn.

She's always been jealous of Quinn at some point or another, but lately she's had no reason to be because for once in her life she has everything she could possibly want and honestly, Quinn's current predicament is nothing to be jealous of. But she's Quinn Fabray and she's still beautiful, even though she waddles when she walks now and her figure is shot to hell because of the pregnancy. So, she can't say that she's all that surprised when the jealousy just sneaks up on her.

She knows that Noah's main concern is the baby, he's told her so and she believes him. It just so happens that the baby and Quinn are a package deal these days and that's what makes it all the more difficult. It's not that she's not worried that Noah might feel something for Quinn, something more than what one feels for the mother of your child, because they fight a lot when they're around each other and he usually ends up walking away before he says something he's going to regret. It's not Noah she's worried about. It's Quinn.

She's watching the two of them snap at each other the way they always do when she sees it, there in the blonde girl's blue eyes, the slightest hint of affection or want or something that is not just platonic feelings towards the father of her child. She thinks it's ironic that Quinn had been the one to push him away, basically tell him that he wasn't good enough to be the father to her baby, and now that he's moved on, she wants him.

"You know you don't have anything to worry about." She hears a voice say from behind her.

She turns around to see Finn standing there. "Oh, hi Finn." Plastering an overly bright smile on her face.

He returns the smile. "Hi." His gaze drifts over her shoulder to where she'd been looking just moments before and then back to her. "You shouldn't worry about Puck and Quinn." He repeats.

"I know. I'm not." She says without hesitation.

"Oh, okay because you just seemed like maybe…" He trails off.

"He's worried about the baby, I know that." She tells him.

Nodding. "Good. Because that's all it's about for Puck." And then his gaze catches something behind her and she thinks that she sees him tense just a little bit.

She turns around to see Noah approaching them. "Hey." She says brightly as he stops in front of her.

"Hey." And then looks over at Finn. "Hey man." Acknowledging his presence.

"Hey." She hears Finn reply.

Things have been better between the two boys, but there are still these weird, awkward moments that are hard to ignore. She knows that it's going to take time before things return to the way they used to be between the two of them and the three of them. She just hopes that's all it is and not something more.

Noah looks down at her, his expression regretful. "So, Quinn has this follow up appointment today, which she conveniently forgot to tell me about, so I can't drive you home." He says apologetically. "Do you think one of your dad's could pick you up?" He asks hopefully.

Trying to hide her disappointment. "They're both working late today."

"Oh… okay, well, why don't you come with us and then I'll take you home afterwards." He suggests.

She bites her bottom lip. "I can't. I have dance today."

He sighs. "Fuck. I forgot about that." He runs his hand over his head. "I swear she does this to piss me off. If she'd mentioned it before then we would've brought separate cars today and this wouldn't be happening." He lets out a breath. "Okay, I'll just tell her that I'll meet her there after I drop you off."

"It's okay, Noah. I can catch a ride with someone else." She says softly, seeing his obvious frustration with the situation.

He gives her a look. "With who?"

"Uh… I can take her, man." She hears Finn speak up from behind. She watches Noah's eyes lift up to look at Finn, his expression unreadable. "I mean, it's not a big deal."

Noah looks at her again and she can practically feel the tension between the two boys. Turning to look at Finn. "Can you give us a second?" She asks quietly.

He nods. "Yeah sure." He turns and walks off, giving them some privacy.

Turning back to Noah. "If you don't want me to…"

He shrugs dismissively. "I don't care. You can if you want."

But she can tell that it bothers him and she's not sure why. "You know that we're just friends, right?"

"I know. It's cool. You should go with him." He says and then brushes a few loose strands of her hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry about this."

She smiles reassuringly. "It's okay. You need go with Quinn to the appointment, it's important. I know you've been worried about the baby, so maybe this will relieve some of your concerns."

"Yeah." He sighs and then smiles a little. "I'll pick you up after dance."

"You don't have to. I can walk home, it's not that far. I don't want you to rush because of me." She tells him.

Shaking his head. "No, I'll pick you up." He insists. "The appointment shouldn't take too long and I just have to drop Quinn off at home and then I'm all yours."

Smiling shyly. "And I'm going to have the house to myself until eight or nine at least." Her fingers play with the buttons on his shirt coyly.

Smirking, he leans forward. "Hell yeah." His voice low as his lips brush against hers softly.

Keeping the kiss chaste, she pulls back before he can deepen it. "I'll see you later." She says, feeling her cheeks burn under the scrutiny of his gaze.

He leans in once more, this time pressing his lips more firmly to hers, before pulling back again. "Later." He grins triumphantly.

She laughs as she watches him walk to where Quinn is waiting by the entrance to the auditorium. She watches them walk out together and then Finn approaches and she looks away.

"Ready to go?" He asks, coming to stand next her.

She looks at him and smiles. "Yes."

He leans down and picks up her pink book bag and then leads her out of the auditorium.

The ride is a quiet one and maybe a little awkward. She wonders if it's ever going feel like it used to between them. If they could ever go back to that place where things weren't so tense and weird and they could all hang out together without it getting uncomfortable.

"So, Puck wasn't too happy about me giving you a ride." He says a matter of factly.

She looks over at Finn. "Why do you say that?"

"Because he had this weird look on his face when I offered."

"It's not what you think. He's fine with it."

He scoffs a little. "Well it's kind of funny that he's the one who doesn't trust me around you, considering he's the one who slept with Quinn when we were dating and then went after yo-"

"Finn…" She warns softly.

"I'm sorry." He takes a breath. "I'm sorry." He says again.

There's a moment of silence and then she speaks. "I thought you were over that. I thought you forgave him and you guys were moving past that." Looking over at him as he keeps his eyes on the road ahead.

"I did and we are. We are." He says and then glances at her out of the corner of his eye. "It's just…" He trails off as if deciding not say anything.

"What?" She asks curiously.

Shaking his head. "Nothing. It doesn't matter."

"No, what? What were you going to say?"

He takes a breath. "I just don't get it. I don't get what it is that Quinn and you and all the girls in school see in him, you know." He finally says. "I mean, I've known him since we were in grade school and he's been my best friend ever since, but he's kind of a jerk."

She remains silent.

"But that doesn't stop the school's female population from falling into bed with him including my ex-girlfriend and..." He looks over at her. "…the one girl I really liked."

She doesn't know what to say to that, except that she can relate to the way he feels because it's the way she had once felt about Quinn and maybe, to some extent, still does. Quinn's always been kind of a bitch, especially to her, but that doesn't stop boys from falling at her feet or girls from fighting each other to be a part of her inner circle. Granted, her queen bee status has been downgraded to a drone these days, but she has no doubt that once the baby is born, she'll reclaim her thrown. So, she understands how Finn feels.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what to tell you." Quietly. "Except that you're a great guy, Finn. You're nice and sweet and kind and any girl would be lucky to be your girlfriend."

She means it. She's always thought that he was perfect boyfriend material. He'd be the kind that's never late for dates and holds open the door and always says the right thing. He wouldn't cheat or look at other girls or lie. He would be a wonderful boyfriend, a perfect boyfriend, just not for her.

"If that's true then why did you choose Puck over me?" He asks. "I mean, you liked me, at least you once did."

"I did like you. I still like you." She insists. "You've been an amazing friend to me. For a while you were really my only friend. And I don't think I ever told you how much your friendship means to me, what having you as my friend means to me." She looks down sadly and a little ashamed. "The thing is that as good as a friend as you've been to me, I don't think I've been a very good friend to you." She admits.

"Well if I had a choice, you wouldn't be my friend. You wouldn't only be my friend." He looks at her as he turns off the ignition, having arrived at the dance studio where her class was being held. "Rachel…" He begins.

"You said you wanted to know what it is about him." She cuts him off, looking at him now. "I can't speak for Quinn or any of the other girls, but I can tell you what it is for me."

He nods silently, almost reluctantly.

"Yes, he's a jerk. Even when he's trying not to be, he can somehow manage to be. But when I'm with him, he's not at all like the Puck everyone knows." She smiles a little as she thinks about him. "He's different. He's sweet and kind and considerate. He cares about me and he makes me feel like I'm the luckiest girl in the whole school to be his girl."

He seems to understand. "You love him." He says quietly.

"I love him." She confirms softly.

He looks away, staring out the windshield of the car, his expression a mixture of sadness and acceptance.

She doesn't know what to say or how to make it better for him. "I understand if being my friend is too difficult for you right now."

He takes a breath and then gives her a crooked smile. "Nah, I think it would probably be harder to not be your friend."

Relieved, she smiles back and then after a moment she reaches for her bag. "Thank you for the ride."

"No problem."

"I'm glad we talked."

He nods. "Yeah." He hesitates for a second. "Hey, do you think that maybe you could not mention this to Puck. I just don't want him to get the wrong idea and you know how he is, he's just automatically going to assume the worst. And we're finally in a good place, I don't want to mess that up."

She feels a bit uneasy about keeping things from Noah, but she would hate for the boys to have a setback over something that was practically nothing.

"Sure, we can keep it between us."

"Great. Thanks, Rachel."

"No problem." She reaches for the door handle. "See you tomorrow?"

He nods. "Yeah."

She steps out of the car and then closes the door, waving goodbye before she walks towards the entrance to the building.

He's waiting for her when she gets out of dance class and her heart skips a beat at the sight of him. He's leaning back against his truck, his hands stuffed in his front pockets of his jeans, wearing his letterman jacket and looking the epitome of the typical high school jock. He's gorgeous and she knows that she's not the only one who thinks so. The other girls from her dance class have noticed as well, it's not the first time he's come to pick her up. And she's pretty sure that they've figured out that he's her boyfriend and not her brother like some were hoping, but apparently that doesn't stop them from staring and commenting on how hot he is and what he could possibly doing with her, even with her standing right there in earshot.

Ignoring the girls, she makes her way towards him. She admits that she likes being the envy of all the girls in her dance class, especially when those same girls are not so nice to her. She likes to think that she's mature enough not to drop down to their level, nor does she feel the need to make some point by making out with Noah right there in the parking lot. However, Noah doesn't seem to share her sentiments and doesn't waste time in dragging her up against him and capturing her lips in a hot and absolutely, scandalous kiss.

She tries to keep the kiss chaste, but as she's come to find when it comes to kissing Noah, that is almost next to impossible when that's the last thing he wants. And like always, she simply gives up and gives in to his insistent advances and her hands are curling into his shirt and pulling him closer instead of away.

She can practically feel him grin against her mouth when he realizes that he's won and instantly deepens the kiss, sliding his tongue into her mouth without resistance. She's not going to deny that she doesn't get a bit of a thrill, knowing that those girls are watching them kiss, although it probably seems more like they're trying to devour each other whole. He has one hand in her hair, she'd taken it down from the bun she'd put it up into during the class, while his other hand is drifting low on her back. But before he can slide it any lower, she breaks the kiss, pulling his hand away before he can reach her behind.

She gives him a scolding look and he just smiles innocently as if he hadn't totally tried to grab her ass out in the open where people could see.

She narrows her eyes suspiciously. "What was all that about?"

He doesn't seem to know what she's talking about. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, did that have anything to do with the group of girls that are currently probably wishing for my untimely death."

His brow furrows and then glances over her shoulder to where she knows the group of girls are still standing. "Why would it have anything to do with them?"

She lets out a mirthless laugh. "Because they happen to think you're very handsome."

He quirks an eyebrow. "Handsome?" Doubtfully.

She rolls her eyes. "Okay. Hot. Sexy. Gorgeous. Don't act like you haven't noticed. I'm sure you have some sort of built in radar."

He laughs. "Nah, no radar. Girls are pretty obvious when they think a guy is 'handsome'." He says with a smirk. "Plus, the stink eye that they're giving you right now, pretty much says it all."

She frowns. "They're awful."

"They're jealous." He counters.

"Because I have a hot boyfriend?" She drones.

"No, because you're crazy talented and probably a better dancer than all of them." He pauses and then adds. "And because you have a totally hot boyfriend that they wish was fucking them and not you."

She looks down, feeling her cheeks grow warm. She can't help but blush when he's so obscenely blunt.

He leans forward. "And I didn't kiss you because of them." She looks up. "I kissed you because I can't help myself and you look fucking hot in this." His fingers play with the sheer pale pink skirt that she has on over her black ballet leotard and pink tights that she wears for dance class.

"What are you talking about? You've seen me in this dozens of times before."

Shrugging. "Yeah, I know and you always look hot in it." He smirks. "I have a thing for you in tights."

She bites her bottom lip, trying not to blush but she knows she's failing miserably. "You're crazy." She tells him and then moves around to the passenger side door. "C'mon, take me home."

He reaches for her hand. "Hey." She turns to look at him expectantly, his expression a little more serious now. "Did everything go okay with Finn?"

She blinks, a little taken back. "Um yeah, it was fine." Trying to sound normal.

He stares down at her for a moment.

"What?" She asks.

His brow is knotted. "You know he's still fucking in love with you, right?" He blurts out.

She looks down. "Why would you think that?" She asks quietly.

He scoffs. "Because it's fucking obvious. You don't think I see the way he looks at you when you're not paying attention, when he thinks I'm not paying attention."

She looks up at him again, sighing a little. "It doesn't really matter if he is or if he isn't." She squeezes his hand. "I'm with you." And then she shakes her head. "And I told him that, so there's nothing for you to worry about."

"What do you mean, you told him that?" Scowling.

Realizing her slip of the tongue. "Nothing, I just mean that I'm with the boy I want to be with and he knows that."

His jaw twitches. "Did something happen?"

"No! Nothing happened." She grabs his hand. "Let's just go, okay." Trying to pull him along, but he doesn't move.

"You're a shitty liar."

She sighs. "Noah…"

"Tell me what happened." His eyes bore into hers.

She realizes that she can't keep things from him because she's just not good at it and she simply just doesn't want to.

"Nothing." He opens his mouth, but she speaks up again. "It's not what you think." She says hastily.

"What the fuck does that mean? That he tried to fucking kiss you or something?" Angrily.

"No! No, Noah!" Grabbing his arm to make him look at her. "We just talked."

"Yeah? About what? About how you would be so much better off with him?" He grumbles darkly as he looks away.

"No, about how I'm in love with you and only want to be with you." She says quietly.

He looks back at her now, the anger fading away. "Oh."

"Yeah." She says with a smile.

"So, he didn't try to kiss you?"

"No, and he wouldn't. He's your friend, Noah. Your best friend." She tells him.

He takes a breath. "I know. You're right."

"Of course I am." She says confidently and he shakes his head, chuckling a little. "Now, can you please take me home. I'm in desperate need of a shower."

She watches his mouth twist into his patented smirk and she knows that everything is okay. "What for, you're just going to get sweaty again." He says suggestively.

Looking up at him from beneath her eyelashes. "Well, I was thinking you could join me."

"Yeah?" He asks with a grin that she's sure is quite capable of causing girls to swoon or perhaps fall back with their legs open is more accurate. Lucky for her, she's developed some immunity to his charms. Not complete, but some.

"It could be fun." They've never done it in the shower and it's something she's been wanting to try for a while.

"Baby, shower sex is always fun." He tells her with a hint of promise in his eyes and then his grin drops away. "Wait a minute, are you using sex to try to distract me from the fact that my best friend is in love with my girl and tried to steal her away."

She rolls her eyes with a smile playing across her lips. "He didn't try to steal me away and no, I'm not trying to distract you, just merely pointing out that we could be doing something far more productive than standing here talking."

He gives her a look and then after a beat. "Good point. We could be getting naked. And when did you say your dads would be home?" A slow grin creeping across his lips.

She grabs his wrist and looks at his watch, it's showing that it's a quarter to seven. "Not for a good hour or so."

"So, what are we waiting for?"

She looks at him in mock exasperation. "Well, you seemed pretty hung up on the whole Finn thing, I wasn't sure if you were still interested-"

He cuts her off. "Just get your sexy ass in the truck already." He says, swatting her behind playfully as she heads to the passenger side of the truck.

She looks through a rack of summer dresses, pulling out a dark blue one in a halter style that catches her eye. It's short and has this ruffle skirt, it's fun and cute. She's at the mall because Noah and Finn are doing guy stuff today, whatever that entails. She suspects that it's mostly eating unhealthy food and playing video games and watching movies with a lot of violence and large explosions.

She knows that it's totally ridiculous, but she misses him. They've been spending so much time together lately that it's almost strange for her to be apart from him for even an afternoon. But she'd been the one to encourage Noah to do something with Finn because she thought it would be good for them, a good opportunity for them to bond, she'd told him. He'd given her a look that said that he thought she was crazy and that she didn't get guys at all. Apparently, guys didn't bond, they hung out. She'd just rolled her eyes and told him to invite him over.

She looks at the dress in her hand again. She likes it enough, it's something she would wear and it's in her size and she thinks Noah might even like it. Although, he's never really complained about anything she wears, mostly because all of her skirts and dresses tended to be short and showed a lot of leg. She decides that she wants a different color and puts it back on the rack.

"Red." A voice says from behind her.

Turning around she sees a very pregnant Quinn Fabray, standing there, looking strikingly beautiful as always. It's hard to ignore that even in her ninth month of pregnancy, the blonde girl glows. She approaches the rack and pulls out the same dress in red and in Rachel's exact size.

"You should get it in red." Quinn says again, holing out the dress. "It's totally your color and he likes it on you."

Rachel takes the dress, a little taken back by all of this. "Thank you." She says, sounding a little unsure.

The blonde girl shrugs. "Sure. No problem."

Rachel watches as she looks through the rack of dresses that she's pretty sure aren't in her current size. "Doing some shopping?" She asks curiously.

Quinn lets out a mirthless laugh. "More like reminiscing about when I used to be able to wear clothes like this." Fingering one of the dresses on the rack.

"You will again, you know."

Looking at her. "I know." Quinn shakes her head. "I just needed to get out of the house. My mother is driving me crazy with her hovering and worrying and…" She sighs. "…it's just too much."

Rachel's gaze drops to her rounded stomach. "How is everything?"

Quinn looks down at her stomach, her hand resting atop of it. "She's good, kicking up a storm actually." She lifts her gaze to meet with Rachel's. "Puck told you about what happened?"

Nodding. "I was there when you called."

"I'm sorry." Sounding almost sincere.

"You don't have to apologize. I'm just glad that the baby is okay and that you're okay." Rachel says softly.

An odd look crosses the blonde's face. "I don't understand. Shouldn't you hate me?"

"Hate you?"

"Yeah. I've always been so horrible to you. I called you names and wrote awful things on your MySpace page." She says. "I'd hate me if I were you."

Rachel shrugs a little. "Well, I admit that I disliked you immensely in the beginning. But now, I'd like to think that we're past all that. I mean, after all, you are pregnant with my boyfriend's baby."

"Right, one more reason you should hate me."

"Well, I don't. You didn't get pregnant on your own. So, if I hate you than I should hate Noah too, but I can't hate him. Not for something that happened before we even got together and might even be the reason we're together now."

Not for the first time, she realizes the irony of the situation. If Noah hadn't gotten Quinn pregnant then he wouldn't have been on the outs with all his jock friends and ultimately, black listed by the entire school. And he wouldn't have been sitting alone on the bleachers that fateful day. And he probably wouldn't have needed a friend and she probably wouldn't have approached him at all if he hadn't been looking so lost and alone.

Smiling a little. "Noah. You call him Noah." Quinn says, sounding amused.

"That's his name."

"No, his name is Puck. He's Puck to everyone. The only person he's Noah around besides his mom and his sister, is you." She pauses thoughtfully. "I guess I was wrong about that, about him. He is different with you."

"Yes, he is. But you were just trying to help." She pauses. "You were, right? Trying to help and not just cause trouble?"

"Yes. Believe it or not. But I'm sorry if I ended up causing trouble." She says sincerely. "Puck pretty much told me to butt out next time, but in not so nice words." She gives her a look that Rachel can't quite read. "He's very protective of you."

Rachel thinks it's ironic that the very girl she's envied, sounds almost envious of her. Something they have in common, oddly enough. "He's very protective of you too."

A mirthless smile ghosts across her lips. "No, he's protective of his daughter."

"He cares about you too, Quinn."

"Yes, as the girl he knocked up. He feels a responsibility towards me, an obligation, it's not the same thing."

And Rachel swears that she can almost hear disappointment in the blonde girl's voice and there's something in her blue eyes, perhaps regret for letting go of something she didn't realize she wanted until it was too late.

"Can I ask you something?" Rachel asks.

"Sure."

"Do you have feelings for him?"

Quinn doesn't seem to be surprised by her question, but hesitates. "Honestly?" She asks.

Rachel nods.

"I don't know what I feel for him." She says softly. "I've never been able to not be a bitch long enough and he's never been able to not be a jerk long enough for us to really figure it out. It's just the way we are and maybe there's always been something there, maybe the same thing that led us to sleeping together that night, I don't know."

Rachel remains quiet, it's pretty much what she suspected.

"But Rachel…" Quinn continues. "…if you're asking me if I love him, then the only honest answer I can give you and the only one that should truly count is that it doesn't really matter what I feel. Because all that matters is that for Puck there is just one girl he has feelings for." She says quietly and then smiles. "You're the only girl he has eyes for now."

She doesn't know what to say because she's never known Quinn Fabray to be nice or say anything that remotely sounded like a compliment, especially to her. And part of her is waiting for the slushy to come out of nowhere and confirm that this is just some sick joke. But it doesn't come and it leaves her speechless.

Quinn's eyes fall to the dress in her hand. "And when he sees you in that dress, he won't be able to take his eyes off you."

Rachel looks at the dress. "You really think so?" She asks.

"Trust me, he loves you in red." She smiles knowingly. "Go try it on." She encourages.

Rachel heads to the dressing room to try on the dress, still a little unsure of what to make of all this. Perhaps they could find some middle ground and find a way to be amicable, friends might be a bit of stretch she admits. But this could be a start.

Pleased, she looks at her reflection in the mirror, having changed into the dress. Quinn had been right, red is definitely her color. She pushes the curtain aside and steps outside the dressing room to see Quinn standing there.

"What do you think?" Rachel asks the blonde girl.

Quinn blinks back with an odd look on her face, likes she's speechless and in shock. "I think my water just broke." She utters.

For a second, Rachel isn't sure she heard her correctly. "What?"

"I think the baby's coming." She says.

"Oh… oh my God." Rachel stares at Quinn and then rushes into the dressing room to grab her stuff. "Okay, okay. We got to get you to the hospital." She says, rushing over to Quinn, who has yet to move.

"I'm not ready for this." Quinn whispers fearfully.

Rachel gives her an encouraging smile. "Yes, you are. You're Quinn Fabray, you can do this."

The blonde girl nods. "You're right, I can do this. I have to do this."

"And I'll be with you until your parents can be there and Noah." She tells her.

Nodding. "Thank you." Smiling softly.

Returning the smile. "C'mon, let's get you to the hospital."

They take Rachel's car to the hospital, Quinn's contractions are already ten minutes apart by the time they pull into the emergency bay. She rushes to the other side of the car and helps her out, she can only imagine the amount of pain she's in. She's been trying to breathe through the pain and screaming through clenched teeth whenever a contraction hit. And she can tell that she's scared and part of Rachel wishes that she knew what to say or do to give her some comfort and reassurance.

"You're doing great, Quinn." Rachel tries to assure her as she helps her walk into the hospital emergency room. "We need some help!" Rachel calls out and a couple of nurses rush over to assist.

"How far along are the contractions?" One of the nurse's asks.

"They're about ten minutes apart." Rachel informs her.

One of the orderlies bring over a wheelchair and Rachel and the nurse help her into it.

"Where are her parents?"

"I called them already, they should be here soon." She had called them and Noah on the way over to the hospital.

"Okay, I need you to fill out these forms in the meantime and we're going to set her up in a delivery room." The other nurse hands her a clipboard and a pen.

Nodding and then looking down at Quinn. "You're going to be okay and I'll send your mom and Noah in as soon as they get here." She assures her.

"Thank you. I mean it, Rachel. Thank you." She says sincerely.

"She's going to be in room 104." The nurse tells her before they wheel Quinn off.

She looks down at the clipboard in her hand when she hears Noah's voice. She looks up and sees him and Finn and Quinn's parents, rushing towards her.

"They just took her in." She tells them as they approach her. "She's in room 104."

She watches as Mrs. Fabray turns to her husband. "I'm going to go. She needs me."

"Tell her I love her and I'm proud of her for being so brave." Mr. Fabray says.

Mrs. Fabray then turns to look at Noah expectantly. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, just give me a second." He says and then tugs on Rachel's arm, pulling her away from the group. "Hey, so I know this is weird and awkward for you, so if you don't want to stick around, I completely understand." He says softly.

She looks up at him, trying to read him. "Do you want me to stay?"

He gives her a look of utter disbelief. "Are you fucking kidding? Of course I do." He says. "But that's not fair to you and it's totally selfish of me and I'd never want you to do something that makes you feel uncomfortable."

"It doesn't. It doesn't make me feel uncomfortable." She says and then glances at Mrs. Fabray who was watching them anxiously. "You should go. I'll be here."

He smiles and then presses a kiss to her forehead. "I love you." He whispers quietly so only she can hear it.

"I love you too." She whispers back.

And then he pulls away and she watches as he and Mrs. Fabray walk off in the same direction Quinn was wheeled off in. She approaches Finn and Mr. Fabray.

"You must be Rachel." Mr. Fabray says and she nods. "Thank you for getting my daughter to the hospital."

"You don't have to thank me." She says. "I'm just glad I was there."

His gaze drops to the clipboard in her hand. "Are those Quinn's forms?"

"Yes, the nurse gave them to me. But I haven't been able to fill them out yet."

"Here." He holds out his hand. "I'll take care of them."

She hands them to him with a grateful smile and watches as he heads to the waiting area.

She turns to Finn then, who has been looking on quietly. "Are you going to stay?"

He stuffs his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, if you think Quinn or Puck won't mind." He says a little uncertainly.

Smiling. "I'm sure they would appreciate it." And they both walk over to the waiting area to sit and wait to hear news on Quinn and the baby.

Five hours later, Noah comes into the waiting area to tell them the good news that both mother and child are okay. Mr. Fabray goes to see his daughter while Noah stays behind to give the Fabrays some time alone. He tells her and Finn about the delivery and about how it was the most scary and amazing experience of his life. As she sits beside him, holding his hand and listening to him, she can tell that he's still a little shell shocked and she can only imagine what he must be feeling right now. He's a father, no matter how brief this moment lasts, and that knowledge alone must be overwhelming for any man, let alone a teenage boy.

When Mr. Fabray comes back into the waiting area, he informs them that he's taking Mrs. Fabray home to get some of Quinn's things because she'll probably be released in a couple of hours. The three of them go see Quinn and sit with her for a bit, now that she's been moved to a private room. The baby has already been taken away to get checked out and weighed, so she and Finn don't get to see her. After awhile when Quinn begins to look tired, they decide to leave so she can rest before she's released. When Noah stands up to come with them, she insists that he stay with Quinn so she's not alone.

She and Finn hang out in the waiting area, playing cards for a while until he announces that he's starving. He asks her if she wants to see what the cafeteria has to offer, she quips that it can't be worse than what the school cafeteria serves. He tells her that Taco Tuesdays are awesome and she doesn't know what she's talking about. She just laughs and tells him to go ahead, she's going to see if Noah wants anything and then she'll meet him there.

She doesn't mean to eavesdrop but when she approaches the hospital room, she hears them talking. And she suddenly finds herself frozen, standing in the hall listening to Quinn and Noah speak in hushed whispers.

"You know what I keep thinking about?" She hears Quinn say softly.

"What?"

"If all of this would've turned out differently. You know, if I had given you a chance in the beginning, instead of pushing you away and lying to Finn. Maybe things would be different now."

"What do you mean?" Sounding confused.

"I mean, maybe this, you and me, could've been something more than just that drunken night." She pauses. "Do you ever think about that?" She asks him quietly.

And Rachel can't help but feel her heart sink a little bit because God knows it's been on her mind ever since she got to the hospital, despite her conversation with Quinn who hadn't quite come out and admitted that she had feelings for Noah, but she might as well have.

She knows that Noah loves her, even the other girl seems to know that. But then again, this is Quinn Fabray and she has always been the beautiful one, the one who all the boys wanted, and now she was also the mother of Noah's child, whether they raised her together or not, that would always remain. And she isn't sure if what she and Noah have is enough to withstand that.

"I don't know." She hears him say and he doesn't sound conflicted or uncertain, just confused, like he doesn't really get what Quinn is asking. "What's going on? Are you having second thoughts about giving her up?"

"No, it's not about that. I know we're doing the right thing. I'm not ready to raise a child or be a mother and I know that sounds selfish, but I'm not and I don't think you are either."

"Okay, so then I don't really understand what you're getting at."

"I guess, I'm just realizing that maybe I made a mistake."

The moment Quinn says those words she has the urge to walk in there and stop her from going any further. But she's unable to move from her spot because this is the last thing she expected to hear when she came up here. She almost wishes that she could just walk away and pretend that she hadn't heard any of this.

"I was wrong to shut you out and I was wrong to make you lie to Finn. And I'm not saying that this is an excuse, but I was scared and I thought that you were just a screw up, but I'm the one who screwed up."

She can practically hear the regret and remorse in the girl's voice and if she's looking at him with those blue eyes, she doesn't know how Noah can possibly not fall under her spell.

"I see the way you're with Rachel and I never thought you could be that way with anyone, but you're different with her. I mean, you're still Puck, but with her you're almost sweet."

"Yeah, so? What's your point?" Sounding a bit defensive.

"I didn't mean it like that." She says gently. "I think it's nice. I think she's lucky."

"Oh." Taken back.

She sighs. "Look, I know I've been a bitch to you and you've actually been decent through all this."

"'S'okay."

"No, it's not. I was awful to you and you were just trying to do the right thing. You're a good guy, Puck." She says sincerely.

"You mean, when I'm not being a jerk to you."

She hears Quinn laugh a little as he chuckles an then there's a long moment of silence between them and she almost thinks that they're not going to talk anymore, but then she hears Quinn speak again.

"Can I ask you something?" Quiet, almost hesitant. "Did you love me?" She hears Quinn ask softly.

And Rachel realizes that she's holding her breath, somehow she already knows what's coming next.

"Yes." She hears him say.

She closes her eyes, leaning her head back against the wall. She's kind of always known, hasn't she? Some part of her has always suspected that he loved her, maybe still loves her, for all she knows.

"But-" She hears him speak again.

"But you're in love Rachel." Quinn finishes.

"Listen, what happened between us that night, it wasn't just a random hookup. And I think I did love you, but then things got so fucked up and twisted around."

"I know."

"And what we did to Finn was so wrong and messed up. I don't think it's supposed to be like that when you love someone." He tells her.

"No, I don't think it's supposed to be either."

"You said you were wondering if things would've turned out different, if things would've worked out better?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I kind of think everything did work out the way it was supposed to, you know." He admits. "Because I have Rachel now and it's fucking crazy that this even happened, but I love her and what's even more insane is that for some reason she loves me back."

And Rachel's heart soars, hearing him say those words.

"And the thing is that for once in my life, something actually feels right instead of just fucked up and all wrong, you know?"

"Yeah, I know." She hears Quinn say softly, sadly.

She realizes that she never really had anything to worry about. And she almost feels silly for thinking that she could have lost Noah to Quinn or that Quinn was trying steal him away. Because she honestly thinks that she wasn't, she was just trying to make sense of everything in order to get some sort of closure. She realizes that the conversation was between two people who had just gone through something intense and scary and were just trying to come to terms with it all.

"Hey." A voice says, starting her.

She turns to see Finn approach her with two styrofoam cups in his hand.

"What's going on? Is everything okay?" He asks, concerned.

She nods. "Yeah, everything's fine." She says with a smile.

"What are you doing standing out here?" Puzzled.

She glances back at the hospital room and then takes Finn's arm and steers him back in the direction he came in.

"Nothing. Let's just go back to the waiting area. Mr. and Mrs. Fabray will be back soon." She tells him.

Mr. and Mrs. Fabray come back shortly with Quinn's clothes and God bless them, some food because Finn said the cafeteria food was definitely not edible. Quinn's parents head up to see their daughter and get her ready for check out, but tell them to go ahead and eat because they're sure that they're starving by now.

She and Finn are eating and chatting when Noah walks into the waiting area. She looks up from her salad to see him standing there with his hands in his pockets, looking tired and drained. She stands up, placing her nearly finished salad on the table before walking over to him. She doesn't say anything, just wraps her arms around him as he does the same to her, burying his face into her hair, holding her tight.

"Are you okay?" She asks softly after a long moment.

Breathing her in. "Yeah." Pulling away slowly. "Thanks for staying."

"Where else would I go?" She says with a small smile.

He looks down at her uncertainly. "Actually, there is somewhere I was hoping you'd come with me."

She doesn't hesitate. "Anywhere."

He seems relieved, like a huge weight has been lifted off his shoulders by her simply agreeing. And then his gaze slides down her body, an amused expression on his face.

"I like the dress. New?" He tugs on the tag.

Her eyes grow wide when she looks down and realizes that she's wearing the dress from the store. "Oh my God!"

"What?"

"I'm a criminal!" She says dramatically. "I walked out of the store without paying for the dress."

He smirks. "Didn't know you had it in you, Berry."

"Noah! This isn't funny. Shoplifting is a crime and this could end up on my permanent record. My permanent record, Noah! Can you imagine if this got leaked to the media?" She exclaims.

"Media?"

"When I'm a star on Broadway and one of those awful celebrity gossip magazines find out about my brief stint as a petty criminal and somehow they'll get their hands on those horrible mug shots the cops take of you when you get arrested and thrown in ja-"

He grabs her arms. "Rachel!" She stops mid rant, staring up at him. "Calm down. First, you're totally crazy. Second, you're not gonna get arrested and thrown in jail because your dads are fucking lawyers and they could get you off of a murder charge if they had to. And third, those celebrity gossip rags are going to be more interested in getting a shot of your naked famous ass than your mug shot-"

"Noah!" She scolds.

"Baby, it's true." He rolls his eyes and sighs when she glares at him. "Look, you'll just go back to the store tomorrow and pay for the dress. I'm sure no one even noticed, what with the pregnant girl about to give birth right in the middle of the junior miss section."

She stares up at him and then sighs. "Maybe you're right."

"Of course I'm right." He placates and then smirks. "Besides when those two cops in the hall showed me your picture and asked if I'd seen you, I totally threw them off your trail. I told them that the crazy chick asked me for change for the bus and seemed like she was in a hurry to get out of town." He quips teasingly.

"What?" Her heart jumps into her throat at the mention of cops.

"I'm kidding! I'm just kidding!" She smacks him on the arm and he grabs his arm in mock pain. "It was a joke! I know you like it rough, but there's no need to get violent, baby." He says laughingly.

She crosses her arms and scowls at him. "Noah Puckerman, you are not funny."

"Hey, I resent that, I'm a very funny guy." He defends as he tugs her towards him playfully. "You totally thought it was funny when I tripped that perv Jacob for trying to look up your skirt that one time and don't even try to deny it because you were laughing so hard you had tears in your eyes." And she can't help but smile.

After a moment she asks. "Do you want something to eat?" Looking over to where Finn was sitting and eating, or more like inhaling the food.

Shaking his head. "No, I'm not really that hungry. But you should finish."

"It's okay, I was done."

"You sure?"

"Yes." And looks up at him with a smile. "So, you said you wanted me to go somewhere with you?" She asks curiously.

"Yeah." He says and then looks over at Finn. "Hey man, we'll be right back."

Finn nods. "Yeah okay." He says, talking around the food in his mouth.

She just shakes her head as Noah takes her hand and leads her towards the elevators. They ride up to the third floor holding hands the entire time. She's curious as to where he's taking her, but when the elevator doors open and she sees that they're on the pediatric floor, she realizes that he's taking her to see his daughter. He leads her towards the nursery at the end of the hall.

They stand in front of the window and she looks at all the small babies, trying to pick out which one is Noah's daughter. He points her out in the middle of the first row, wrapped in a pink blanket and a pink cap on her head. She's all pink and tiny and sleeping.

"She's beautiful."

He leans against his side, staring through the window at his daughter. "Yeah."

"Did you think of a name for her?" She asks quietly.

"Beth." He says instantly. "We decided on Beth."

She smiles. "I like it. She looks like a Beth."

She looks over at him and then moves closer to him, pressing herself into his side and sliding her arm around his waist. She feels his arm come around her shoulders, holding her close as they continue to watch Beth sleep through the window.

TBC...

Song Credit: Heart and Shoulder by Heather Nova

I'm so sorry for the lengthy delay. Life has been crazy lately and hasn't left me with a lot of free time to write. But I finally got this chapter done, the next one is the last one (depending how long it ends up being). I'm also simultaneously working on the other fic, so once this one is done, I think the updating for the next fic will be a lot more consistent as long as stay ahead with the writing.

Anyway, I just want to say thank you for reading and hanging in there with me. You guys have all been so great and I appreciate the feedback and words of encouragement.

browneyedgirl