Hey look! I'm getting somewhere again!So welcome back to Cookie Wars!

(I still crave your ideas though!)

I just noticed, did I ever put a disclaimer here? I'm not sure, I don't exactly remember. Oops. Oh well, I'll do one now just in case! *slaps Leafpool's ass* Say the disclaimer.

Leafpool: ._. Wtf!

Say the friggin' disclaimer or it get's personal!*flexes fingers* (meaning groping of her breasts)

Leafpool: Oh sh- Mii-chan does not own anything from the Warriors series. *shaking* How was that?

Oh I'm not sure that'll suffice.

Leafpool: Waaah? Wait, wait! *backing away as I advance*

You should explain yourself more!*grab*

Leafpool: Wtf! No, wait! NOT UNDER THE SHIRT-

SSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH(static)*

*Experiencing technical difficulties

*pops up in front of static* You're all going to think I'm a perverted weirdo now aren't you?

Firedance somehow managed to slingshot herself all the way to the front, alongside Squirrelflight. She then got pissed that Firedance was getting ahead. Soon they were racing like idiots through the trees. The three in Firedance's car were once again screaming like a little kid on a roller coaster. "FIREDANCE, SLOW THE FUCK DOWN!" Tigerstar's ghost screeched, attempting not to fly backwards into Leafpool behind him.

The box holding Berrykit had long since fallen off, the screaming kit chasing after the kart after having somehow escaped the box. Leafpool, who was hanging onto the pole still, had her tail yanked upon when Berrykit decided to grab hold. She promptly kicked him in the face. "Oh shit, oops!" She swore.

Jayfeather was thankfully wearing his seatbelt because he'd passed out from hyperventilating.

Whoops.

Anyway, while Squirrelflight and Firedance rammed wheels, suddenly they hit a randomly placed ramp and…

THEY FLEW INTO A RIVER!

Firedance began screaming every swear-word under the sun and than some, Tigerstar simply floated u (being a ghost), Leafpool grabbed Jayfeather (who was still unconscious), and they swam up. "Damn it to hell! God wake him up!" Squirrelflight shouted.

Greystripe floundered around until Firedance, still swearing, grabbed him by the tail and towed him to shore.

She jumped back in and grabbed Jayfeather, pulling him there. "Jay fat-batter, wake the fuck up!" She screamed, slapping Jayfeather in the head.

"Jay….fat….batter?" Everyone muttered, all having a 'wtf' look on their face.

He woke up and looked at the livid she-cat standing over him. "HOLY FUCKING SHIT IN HELL UP THE DAMN ASS!" He shrieked, jumping twenty feet into the air.

Firedance caught the tom and tossed him into a thorn bush. "Stow it." She snarled.

"Where the hell are we?" Jayfeather asked, wincing as he dragged himself out of the bush.

Firedance immediately ran back to the river, dove in, swam down to the sinking golf cart, opened a secret compartment on the floor, pulled out some snipers, machine guns, and pistols with silencers, and swam back to the surface. She emerged panting behind a bunch of reeds. She swam around to see the others surrounded by Windclan cats. "Dammit!" She swore irritably.

"Hey-"

"AIIEEEEE!" Firedance screamed and jumped a foot out of the water.

A hand shot over her mouth and dragged, fighting like hell, under the water. "God dammit to hell quit struggling or I'll stand on your head!"

It was Bluestar.

"Holy shitting fuck!" Squirrelflight said, appeared next to Bluestar.

"You unclefuckers!" Firedance hissed. "Frickin' bitch!"

"Okay, you can stop swearing and hand over a friggin' pistol!" Bluestar snapped.

"So much for secrecy." Firedance pointed out.

"Yeah, that TOTALLY went tits up!" Firedance snarled, pulling out a pistol and tossing it to the two she-cats in front of her.

She pulled a sniper from her back and cocked it. "Heh, heh, cocked." Bluestar giggled and was promptly slapped by both Squirrelflight and Firedance.

"What's up guys?" A voice suddenly said and the trio screamed.

"FAGGOTCOCK!" Firedance shrieked, throwing a punch.

It hit Greystripe in the face. "What the hell?" He yelled, rubbing his cheek.

"You stupid son of a god damn mother fucking-graaaah!" Bluestar wailed.

"Shush!" Firedance suddenly hissed.

She was holding the sniper and carefully parting the reeds with it. She took aim, and fired. It hit one of the Windclan cats square through the forehead. He collapsed backwards in a heap. The others all began screaming and sprinted away, trampling anyone that got in their way. The cats they'd captured had already been tied up and bound on the ground.

Somehow.

The four behind the bushes rushed up and untied them by cutting the ropes with the daggers Firedance had up her sleeves. "Damn!" Jayfeather swore, getting up.

Firedance smacked in the head with a flashlight. "Ow, what the hell?"

"Shush!" Leafpool snapped.

Wham!

"AAAAAIIIEEEE!"

They all looked over to see that Tigerstar was somehow solid and had sat on a random landmine. "F-"She hissed, starting to shake, Squirreflight doing the same.

"Okay, she-cats. Calm down. Calm- calm!" The other cats started to say, but slowly backed away.

"Ffff-" They both hissed, Firedance slowly picked up dual-pistols while Squirrelflight grabbed a machine gun."

"RUN LIKE HELL!" Jayfeather shouted, sprinting for the trees.

"FUUUUUUUUUUU-" Both screamed, aiming at the Riverclan camp that they could see across the river.

They both ran across the water ninja-style and burst into the camp and began to fire erratically. "-UUUUUUUUUUUU-"

They were still screaming.

Everyone in the camp either: hit the deck, ran for their lives, were shot, or hid. "-UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" They still screamed, while pulling out more bullets and bombs and other crazy shit.

"-UUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

And they still screamed.

This could take a while.