I wanted to try out a different breed of KKM fic – the ever-elusive AU fic. Too many ConYuu fics are within the rather open parameters of the original series. But this time,

I SAY NAY!

I dunno what chapter length people should really be expecting, or the speed of publication. If the chapters are like, four or five pages in length, I could probably put one out every day or every other day for a while. Much longer than that, and, being realistic, I could probably handle one a week. Once again, I dunno. I guess, holla your input with that magical button down at the bottom of the page that allows you to transmit your thoughts and feelings thousands of miles away instantaneously to the inbox of a person eagerly hanging on your every word like a creepy stalker.

DISCLAIMER: First they were thoughts. Then they were scribbled notes. Then they were rough drafts. Then they were novels. Then they were sketches. Then they were manga. Then they were episodes. And you know what? Never, and I mean never, were they mine.


"Momma?"

"Yes, Wolfram, dear?"

"How come Conrad's last name is Weller?"

"For the same reason Gwendal's last name is von Voltaire, and why yours in von Bielfeld: he has a different father than you."

"But 'Weller' isn't German, is it, Momma?"

"Well…no. My dear, we don't talk about that. Let's talk about something else."

"He's not German, is he?!"

"Wolfram, baby, please, keep your voice down! It's not something you want people to hear!"

"Conrad's not German, Conrad's not German!"

"QUIET!"

"…I… I'm sorry, Mu-Momma."

"No, shh, baby, I'm the one who should be sorry. Don't cry; I shouldn't have yelled at you. Just know that… that's not something you should ever tell anyone, love. Even if they ask you. It's a secret. You can keep a secret, right, love?"

"Uh-huh. I won't tell."

"…Thank you, Wolfram. Conrad thanks you, too."


"Hello, madam Cheri."

"Why hello, there. What brings strapping young soldiers like yourselves to my front door?"

"Er… well, you see, ma'am, we have a warrant for your son's arrest."

"…What?! Which son? On what charges?! I demand to know! Tell me NOW!"

"Ma'am, this warrant has the Fuhrer's seal on it. We don't need to tell you anything. Now, we need to know where Conrad Weller is. Now."

"Hell if I let you intimidate me! My son has been a model citizen! How dare you insinuate that he has been anything less! YOU WILL NOT TAKE HIM!"

"Sorry, ma'am, but it's not up to you."

"It's not up to us either, for that matter."


"Mother."

"Conrad?"

"CONRAD!"

"Baby! Oh, thank God you're alright! Did they hurt you? Did they torture you? Oh God, my baby's been tortured!"

"They didn't touch me, Mother."

"I'll believe it when I see it, love. Oh, hug me. I just can't believe that you're safe and sound, after all that."

"What did they take you for, then, Conrad?"

"Yes, I'm rather interested to know myself."

"Wolfram! Gwendal! Don't ask your brother things like that so soon! Just be grateful that he's here."

"It's alright, Mother. I take no offense. They wanted to talk about my father."

"…They knew?"

"Yes. It seems they found out that Father was American."

"And now that the Americans are in the war…"

"They suspected me of espionage, of course."

"And they still didn't torture you?!"

"No, but there was a reason for that. They offered me a chance to prove myself. Show some good, old-fashioned nationalism, since I've been living here in Germany my entire life. I have to join the military. There's even a special unit for those of mixed blood, like me, so I doubt there will even be too much hazing."

"But…Conrad, I don't want to see you go off to war…I don't want to lose you, love. You're my child. I can't just…I can't-"

"There's no other way, Mother. It's either this, or…well, they didn't exactly say, but even if they had, I doubt I'd be of a mind to repeat it."

"If there's no way out of it, I'll be waiting for your return."

"Me, too!"

"And me, I suppose."

"And you'd better come back, my dearest son. I shall beat you blind if you don't."

"Understood, Mother. I'll come home when all this nonsense has blown over."


"Mother!"

"COOOOONRAAAAAD! Oh! You said you'd come back, and you did! Ooooh! That's my boy! That's my little war hero! And don't you think I haven't heard about your bravery and valour, my little kinder!"

"Hey, what about MY bravery and valour? Don't I get any credit?"

"Honey, who is this?"

"His name is Yozak. We were stationed on the front lines together. We came out on the other side of Ruthenberg together, too."

"Oh! Goodness gracious! Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Yozak! I welcome any friend of Conrad's with open arms. Especially one with such pretty arms himself…"

"Mother!"

"Whoops; sorry, Wolfram."

"It's good to be home."

"Conrad."

"Yes, Gwendal?"

"Things…are a bit different than you left them."

"Eh? How so? What happened?"

"Well…"

"You may want to be sitting down for this."

"That big?"

"That big. Julia…well, you know how much she was against the war. Rather vocal about it, too."

"And we were always warning her that the Fuhrer likes cripples about as much as he likes the Jews. Your point? Wait… something hasn't happened to her, has it?"

"Conrad…"

"What's happened?! Is she alright?"

"No. Conrad… she was rounded up and taken away. We were notified last month that she'd died in Auschwitz."

"…No. Julia…no. That's not possible…How could…What…I don't understand."

"No one ever does, Conrad, my love. No one ever does."

"This Julia… was she somebody important to you?"

"Sorry Yozak; I was going to introduce you to her while you were in town. I guess…that's not going to be possible, is it?"

"It's okay. I'm very sorry for your loss."

"Mm. But, in answer to your question… yes. She was a very important person, but not just to me. She was kind of a saint, in many ways. The world is darker for her passing."

"Way to go poet on me."

"Was there a funeral?"

"No. We weren't permitted to hold one. There wasn't even a body to bury, according to her older brother."

"I'm sorry, everyone. I've just gotten home, but I think I need to be alone for a while. I'm sorry."

"It's alright. We understand. We'll leave you alone."

"If you need someone to talk to, Conrad, consider me willing."

"Thanks, but… I just need to be alone."


"Shit, man, you're leaving?"

"Yeah. I won't stay in this fucking country a second longer than I fucking have to."

"Whoa. Bitter. This has something to do with your Julia, doesn't it?"

"Of course not, Yozak. What on EARTH made you think that?"

"Tone down the sarcasm, lambchop. I'm your friend, here."

"You're not acting like it."

"Where are you going to go if you're not going to stay here?"

"I don't know, anywhere. Hell is better than this place. Maybe I can find myself a one-way ticket there."

"Not a path I'd recommend, dear Commander."

"Then what the fuck do you suggest?"

"Japan."

"Japan?"

"Yeah. Good country. Hot summers. Nice folk when they're not going all fascist on you. Not that they can anymore, with the Americans occupying 'em. Trust me, it's a good place to lay back and relax without anyone getting on your back that you're half German. No one's gonna fault you for that in an entire country that's going super-paranoid after getting bombed. Not that they weren't paranoid as fuck before."

"…Japan, huh?"

"No reason why we shouldn't, Commander."

"We?"

"I said I was your friend, didn't I? That means that when I follow you in, I intend to follow you out just the same. I'm coming with you. Not like I have too much attachment to Europe, anyway."

"…Well, alright. Just don't piss me off."

"Impossible demands, as usual."

"Shut up."

"Hai."


(A/N): Hellz yes! Wrote the prologue and made a double-batch of brownies at the same time. And who says writers can't multitask? Suck it.

But what the hey. I just wrote an entire prologue with nothing but dialogue. Is it clear who's speaking most of the time? 'Cause I tried to make it as easy to understand as possible. I wanted to make it as much flashback-y as possible. In most of my memories, at least, I remember mostly words. What someone said, how someone said a thing. You don't remember too much of anything else (maybe the time of day) and there's very little to really prompt a narrative, so writing a narrative for a flashback seemed sacrilege to me. It just wasn't accurate. Plus, dialogue is so much easier to crank out at ridiculously fast paces. Had I included narrative, this would be a much longer prologue, but it also wouldn't have been half so interesting. Much like my incessant rambling right now.

I'm going to shut up now.

Also, Yozak's a wonderful character to write for. He's so much fun!

Love ya. Review fast or die slow.