AN: Solely cherryshadowz's fault ("Now I have this image of Castiel studiously separating the boy's clothes and deliberating on the type of soap to buy for the clothes.") - look what you've done... Many thanks to citizencandy for the prompt beta - you rock!
It was not the first time Castiel was doing laundry, but it was the first time Castiel had to visit a Laundromat. As he believed in thorough research, Castiel decided to borrow Sam's laptop and check to what extent washing clothes at a self-service laundry differed from doing laundry at somebody's home. After about five minutes, he had found the answer to most of his questions: A website titled "11 Tips for Washing Clothes at the Laundromat".
~*~
1. Have coins or money set aside
Castiel owned no money except for the few coins Jimmy had left in his wallet ('purse' is feminine). But since he would be doing laundry for Sam and Dean, he figured it would be okay to take some of theirs. Castiel knew Dean kept a stack of quarters in the Impala securely tucked away behind his tissues in case they spent the night at a motel with magic fingers.
First item - check.
2. Check detergent, bleach and softener levels
Up until now, the people Castiel was helping with their laundry had mostly operated their washing machines themselves. He had no idea what kind of detergent, bleach or softener he should use as neither Sam nor Dean owned any of the aforementioned items. With a ten dollar note from Sam's wallet, the Angel went shopping.
Tide Total Care For High Efficiency
Era 2X Ultra Active Stainfighter
Tide April Fresher Detergent
Great Value Mandarin Essence
Surf Spring Burst
Surf Sparkling Ocean
All Small & Mighty Wild & Fresh
Cheer Brightclean Free and Gentle
Castiel stopped at that point, having not even looked through half of the items on the first shelf of the laundry aisle. He figured a human could try another product every time his old one ran short and still never have to buy something twice.
He decided to take the flask labeled 'Cheer'. Both Sam and Dean could use something to brighten up their mood from time to time. And 'Free and Gentle' sounded very desirable - even for clothes.
Second item - check.
3. Sort clothing at home
Sorting the Winchesters' clothes by colors - as suggested in the How-To - didn't seem to make much sense. Both hunters not only preferred to wear low-keyed clothes, but all of their garments had been washed often enough for them to no longer stain. Instead, Castiel decided to make a pile of Sam-clothes and Dean-clothes.
~*~
The opportunity to follow the remaining eight items on the list came very soon. Castiel just wanted to return the change from his trip to Wall-mart, as he found Dean undressing himself in the bathroom while complaining loudly - bitching, as Sam would say - about having to do laundry after his well-earned shower. Castiel decided to make his friend happy and take on Dean's burden. With a motion so swift and fast that Sam didn't even notice, the Angel gathered his friends' clothes and headed towards the next Laundromat, a print-out of the website in one of his pockets.
~*~
Secure the washing machines
It was already nearing midnight, still two other people where currently inside the brightly lit shop. With five of the eight machines already occupied, Castiel decided to spread the Winchesters' clothes across the remaining three washing machines.
Follow the washing machine instructions
According to the Tips there had to be some kind of instruction on how to work those huge white machines behind one of the lids. Castiel opened the first one and found some kind of drawer that had an very intense smell of washing agent. Behind the second one, he finally found the instructions and proceeded to read through them very carefully. With a frown on his face, the Angel decided that operating a washing machine was way more complicated than even summoning a lesser unicorn.
Be mindful of temperature settings
Unfortunately, the labels with the washing instructions on all items of clothing the Winchesters owned were too washed out for even his angelic senses to decipher the writing. Castiel shortly pondered asking one of the other patrons, but the elderly male's clothes looked as if he wasn't the best to ask about washing instructions himself and the young woman was engrossed in her telephone. As the core temperature of the human body could, in case of a high fever, reach levels above 40°C, he decided to adjust the machine to that setting. If a garment wouldn't survive being worn by a feverish human it surely wasn't suited for a Winchester. The clothes just would have to 'suck it up'.
Never leave clothing unattended
Although Castiel doubted anybody in his right mind would try to steal the Winchesters' torn, bloodied and well worn garments, he was not going to take any risks. He folded his arms behind his back and started his silent vigil. The sight of the clothes spinning inside the machines was very… mesmerizing…
After a few minutes - and very strange glances from the elderly man - Castiel remembered that there were approximately four items left on his list. He retrieved the folded paper and read through the last paragraphs.
Walk with an activity to occupy downtime
The website stated a few recommendation on how to pass the time.
A novel? He did not own anything of the like. He should remember to purchase a few of the Supernatural books.
A textbook? Castiel doubted Bobby would be happy lending him one of his old tomes so he could read it while doing laundry…
Newspaper? Okay, he probably should have brought the one still lying next to Sam on the table.
Bible? What kind of website was that to suggest its readers to study the Holy Writ? Castiel decided to add the URL to his bookmarks - if he should ever own his own computer.
Re-connect with family… - not a very bright idea on his behalf…
… and friends? Sam was doing research, Dean was taking a shower and Bobby…? Right, Bobby.
Castiel pulled his cell phone out of his coat and dialed the old hunter's number.
"Castiel? You in trouble?" Bobby's gruff voice asked with a hint of worry only moments later.
"No."
"Are Sam 'n' Dean all right?"
"Yes."
"Then why the hell are you calling in the middle of the night, idjit?!"
"I am doing laundry…"
"You're doing laundry…?"
"Yes. And the website stated I should call a friend."
"Some crazy internet page told ya to call me?"
"Yes."
"Okay… Are you drunk, boy?!"
"No, I am sober."
"Cursed?"
"No…"
"Crazy?!"
"No…"
"Okay, featherbrain, some of us mud monkeys need their beauty sleep once in a while. So, I'm giving you a piece of free advice: Do. Not. Call. Past. Midnight! Unless somebody is at least missing a few body parts!"
With an angry click the line went dead.
Castiel decided to watch the clothes spin instead.
Sort clothing for the dryer too
Again, Castiel was not able to decipher the instructions on the washed out labels so he read through the website's instructions carefully a second time. It said he should gather all lighter clothing and stuff it into a dryer separate from the heavier items such as jeans. Unfortunately only one drying machine was still unoccupied at that time and its lid was opaque so he couldn't even watch the enthralling dance of garments any longer.
Walk with hangers
This Laundromat neither had carts nor hangers to hang from its hanging bar so Castiel decided to proceed to the next item on his list.
Fold as much as possible
This was what he was best at. This was what he had done countless times before. It didn't take the Angel long; with swift, measured and graceful movements he folded each and every item neatly to the same size. It took Castiel less than two minutes to finish all four machine loads worth of clothes. As he put the last item on Sam's stack he noticed he had an audience. Both the elderly man and the young woman were watching him, gaping openmouthed.
"How… how the heck did you do that?!" the woman finally found her tongue first.
"I have had a lot of practice," Castiel answered truthfully.
"Wow… you probably could make money with that kind of… Speed Stacking."
Castiel did not understand why she and the elderly man were suddenly grinning but his phone started ringing before he could come up with a reply anyways.
Only moments later, two flabbergasted humans were the only customers of the tiny Laundromat in Sprucedale, Colorado.
AN: This website really does exist, just google for 11-tips-for-washing-clothes-at-the-laundromat