13. LOVERS AND FRIENDS

Okay, Lili, Hwoarang, and Asuka went upstairs to take a hot, steamy shower. Xiaoyu and Julia are pulling each other's hair out, while Leo watches. Steve, Jin, and Lei left and Miharu watching Xiaoyu like she's Big Brother. Leo's phone rings.

"Oh crap, I totally forgot!" Leo said shaking his/her head, "DAMMIT!"

Julia and Xiaoyu stop fighting to see what was wrong.

"Leo, what's up?" Julia asked.

"You're NOT Leo's friend so don't ask it what's up, that's my JOB!" Xiaoyu shouted, "Leo, what's up?"

"I forgot about my freaking appointment, I gotta go." Leo said grabbing his/her coat.

"Why do you have an appointment?" Julia asked.

"AGAIN BITCH, LEO IS NOT YOUR FRIEND! SO SHUT THE HELL UP AND LET ME PRETEND I GIVE A DAMN! GOSH!" Xiaoyu yelled.

"All you can do is pretend, you don't give a damn about anyone else but yourself!" Miharu cried.

"What? No I don't, you effed up by telling my secrets that were suppose to stay between us, so it's not my fault that you screwed up!" Xiaoyu said getting up, "Matter of fact, you were the one who screwed me over so I was entitled to get back at ya!"

"Well...you...damn." Miharu said looking down.

"Damn is right, how the hell do you get out witted by XIAOYU?" Julia asked.

"Julia, you're the only dumbass, at least I'm not $3,000 in debt." Xiaoyu fired back.

"Touché." Julia said nodding her head.

"Ha, how in the hell do you both get out witted by Xiao?" Leo asked laughing.

Julia and Miharu both shrugged, "She's right."

"Right, oh umm, I have an appointment with my doctor, she's going to tell me whether or not if I'm a male or a female." Leo smiled.

"Well don't you have both the parts? Plus, you have boobs, so aren't you a girl with a small penis?" Xiaoyu asked.

"Hey my penis is not small-"

"Oh for god's sakes, it's like the same size of my pinky, that's not a penis!" Julia shouted.

"I rocked you world didn't I?" Leo smiled.

"Yeah with a fucking dildo, I could've slept with a chick for that!" Julia shouted.

"Ha, you did! Asuka and Leo!" Xiaoyu laughed.

"I'm so pissed off right now, Xiaoyu is on a freaking roll!" Julia huffed. "And yeah, I guess you're right."

"Yeah, well I'm getting my penis-"

"Pinky toe." Julia giggled.

"Hey, a penis is a penis, no matter what size okay? Besides it doesn't matter, I'm going to do what NAMCO didn't do, make me one sex!" Leo shouted stomping out.

"Let us know how that turns out!" Xiaoyu shouted.

"So I guess, we're both cool with Xiaoyu now, huh?" Miharu asked.

"Or, we could jump her-"

"Jump me and that will be the biggest mistake you two will ever make, I have a panda bodyguard and I'm not afraid to use her!" Xiaoyu shouted.

"I was kidding, chill teapot. I was really going to suggest that we all go and look for Jin." Julia said putting her hands up in defense.

"Okay, let's go and we can ride Panda!" Xiaoyu beamed, "LET'S GO GET MY MAN!"

"I think Xiaoyu is BP." Julia whispered to Miharu.

"Don't talk about Xiaoyu that way!" Miharu said giving Julia an evil glare.

"Or maybe it's just me!" Julia said putting her hands up in defense.

"Yeah, it's just you." Xiaoyu and Miharu sighed, "Let's go get JIN!"

Meanwhile, Hwoarang, Lili, and Asuka were upstairs, getting ready to take a shower.

"Which soap should we use?" Lili asked.

"Does it matter, only one of us is really going to take a shower, they don't make showers big enough for two!" Hwoarang said irritated.

"Hmm, should we use Cherry Blossom or Lavender Rose?" Lili asked.

"Okay, fine, be a bitch and pretend that you didn't hear me." Hwoarang huffed.

"Oh I heard you, I'm just not listening-Ooh Vanilla and Brown Sugar!" Lili giggled.

"Those are some fruity ass smells for a dude, what the hell happen to powder fresh or unscented?" Hwoarang said scratching his head, "Hell Old Spice or whatever that's manly!"

"These aren't Jin's, it's mine." Lili said rolling her eyes, "He has that cheap crap you were talking about."

"Asuka, I'm ready, why aren't you saying anything?"

"Three is a charm, two is not the same, I don't see the harm, so are you gamed-yes?" Asuka smiled.

"This is the third time you have sung that song, give it a rest!" Hwoarang said slapping his forehead.

"Y'know Hwoarang, you can always leave-"

"Yeah, I only invited you to keep up an image and get my three way, but if you want to be a little bitch." Asuka said irritated.

"Maybe I should leave, I can call up Christie and Zafina and get me a new tricycle going!" Hwoarang shouted.

"Fine, go do that!" Lili and Asuka shouted.

"Fine, I will!" Hwoarang said storming out. "Wasting precious tricycle time with soap and singing!"

"Shut the hell up!" they yelled.

So Lili and Asuka were left alone in the room. Lili looked over at Asuka and huffed. Asuka looked back and sighed heavily.

"Sooo, Asuka..." Lili trailed, "It's just you and me-"

"Do you like me, or is this some kind of sexual thrill for you?" Asuka asked.

"Wait, shouldn't I ask that?" Lili asked confused.

"Huh, oh wait, you're right, I read your lines." Asuka said looking through some papers. "I skipped over mine, yeah me and you, ready to finish what we started?"

"Asuka...to answer your question, yes, I do like you-a lot" Lili said blushing hard.

"Oh, okay cool." Asuka blushed.

"Well, do you like me?" Lili asked.

"Umm, a little, well a lot more than I did before." Asuka said rubbing her arm. "Look, Lili, I'm not into the whole being the L word thing. I like guys, a lot more than chicks...but."

"But, but" Lili said shaking her head, slightly irritated.

"But, I think I like you more than Hwoarang, but I like Jin a helly lot." Asuka blushed. "And my future hubby is Lei."

"Ha, wait, you like your cousin?" Lili giggled.

"Oh I tell you I like you more than Hwoarang, but you want to bring up my serious love for Jin." Asuka huffed. "Gosh, if he wasn't my cousin I'll-"

"Ha ha, Asuka." Lili smiled. "Are you going lavender on me?"

"And then you take my saying, well, Hwoarang's, Jin's and mine, but still, you're using it on me?" Asuka blushed harder.

"It's so cute that you're blushing!" Lili smiled bigger. "It's too-too cute!"

"Sigh, it started as a sexual thing, but like I said, I like you more than Hwoarang." Asuka said staring out the window. "Excuse me if I don't want to take a shower with you."

"Suka...oh my Gucci purse! Are you gonna tell me that you want to be my-" Lili gasped and giggled.

"No, that's not what I was going to say-"

"Then what were you going to say Ms. Tomato? Y'know you're redder than Hwoary's hair." Lili smiled.

"Shut up, don't use my pet name for him, god, maybe I'll make him my future hubby and Lei my baby daddy...Oh right, Lili, I want to experiment with you." Asuka blushed.

"You're not making any sense." Lili said shaking her head.

"I want you to be my first-"

Just then Bryan and Yoshimitsu crashed into the roof and were fighting now in the room.

"GAH! What the hell-"

"What the hell, first appearance in the damn story and you want to eff up our moment!" Lili shouted pissed.

"Get out of here! We were talking, I was sharing my inner thoughts!" Asuka shouted.

Yoshimitsu and Bryan kept fighting, ignoring them. Lili did an anime fall and Asuka had a huge sweat drop.

"I was being vulnerable and I was showing my weak side." Asuka cried.

Yoshimitsu and Bryan stopped fighting and gasped, "WHAT?"

"Yeah, we were having Girl Talk and you guys are interrupting." Lili said shaking her head.

"Well it depends, what were you talking about?" Yoshimitsu asked.

"What the hell do you mean it depends, Girl Talk is Girl Talk, hell something is wrong with you." Bryan shouted.

"Hey shut up! It's funny to see how they get worked up about a guy!" Yoshimitsu said. "And then there's the sexy pillow fight that happens afterwards!"

"Hmm, you're right, so what were you guys talking about?"

"Periods!" Lili smiled.

"Tampons!" Asuka shouted.

"Periods and what we prefer for our flow, umm I like to use tampons because I feel cleaner when I-"

"!" Yoshimitsu and Bryan yelled covering their ears.

"Let's go finish this fight somewhere else!" Yoshimitsu said tapping Bryan's shoulder.

Bryan thought he was hitting him so he punched Yoshimitsu in the face and they started fighting out of the room and down the stairs. Lili and Asuka both had a sweat drop on their forehead.

"Okay, now that they're gone, what were you going to say?" Lili asked smiling at Asuka.

"Huh, Oh, I was uhhh..." Asuka blushed.

"Asuka please, while we're still young." Lili joked rolling her eyes.

"I was going to say that I want you to be my first-"

"Hey Asuka, Lili I'm back!" Jin said coming into the room.

"No, damn, can't anything I want come true? God, Heihachi must die for this!" Lili said irritated. "GET OUT!"

"Hell no bitch, this is my house!" Jin said.

"I thought this was Kazu's house?" Asuka asked.

"Yeah, well he gave me it as a late Father's Day gift." Jin said.

"Jin, you're not a father." Asuka said with a sweat drop on her head.

"Hell tell Julia that, she swears I got her pregnant but I never slept with her!" Jin shouted.

"Oh my Gucci purse, there you again bringing your B.S. into my life!" Lili cried.

" Get used to it, if you want to date Asuka. And Suka, I heard what you said about me, and I feel the exact goddamn way." Jin said staring at Asuka.

Asuka blushed hard, "Shut up Jin."

"Admit it." Jin smiled.

"No." Asuka said shaking her head.

"Well technically I wouldn't be your cousin anymore if I'm in Devil form. So, I'm just saying-"

"Jin, it's still weird no matter how the hell you say it or word it." Lili said irritated.

"Oh shut up, you just want to be Asuka's girlfriend or bitch, whatever you prefer to be called." Jin said rolling his eyes.

"I prefer girlfriend-"

"Ahh, but bitch fits you so much better!" Jin said poking Lili in the forehead.

"Whatever Jin, go fuck one of your punk ass screwy fan girls." Lili said slapping his hand.

"I'm not Hwoarang." Jin said.

"I know you're Jin." Lili said.

"NO, do you get what I'm implying?" Jin asked.

"No." Lili said irritated.

"He's implying that he's not a man hoe like Hwoary." Asuka said.

"Aww, you know me so well, we should be together." Jin smiled, "Yes, I am not a man whore like Hwoarang-"

"I am not a man whore!" Hwoarang said, "I just know how to have a good time!"

"Oh my Gucci, not you too!" Lili said face palming herself. "Who else is going to pop in?"

Just then Paul and Law came in with Steve. Xiaoyu, Julia, and Miharu came in riding on Panda. Kazuya came in with the coolest entrance ever and everyone else from Tekken came in.

"OH MY GOD! I FREAKING HATE MY LIFE!" Lili cried heavily.

"Well at least you know how I feel." Jin smiled evily. "I have a curse, my family is trying to kill each other, everyone hates me and I can't be with the one I like."

"Aww Jin, you can still be with me!" Nina, Julia, and Xiaoyu cried.

"Eww, you see!" Jin cried. He walked away and sat in a dark corner. He started to play Linkin Park and stared out the window.

"Jin I hate you with a passion…now why the fuck is everyone here?" Lili yelled.

"Oh, because I wanted to tell everyone the good news!" Leo smiled.

"I should have known you're no sex ass had something to do with people gathering!" Lili yelled. "Well, what is it?"

"Oh, I finally know what sex I am." Leo cried. "Okay get on the side that you think I am."

Everyone stepped to one side they thought was Leo's sex. Maury walked in and stood next to the groups.

"So what do you think, man or woman?" Maury asked.

"Man that's a man Maury, she ain't got no boobs!" Lee shouted.

"Yeah, that's a man, she don't have curves." Raven said.

"Man or woman?" Maury asked.

"Mhm, I don't know why they keep saying she's a boy, that's a girl, she just ugly and rough looking." Christie said.

"Well we all can't look like you." Maury said, "Man or woman?"

"That's a chick, she just got a boyish figure, but that's a girl, look at her face." Law said.

"No no, that's a dude Law." Paul said shaking his head.

"No no my friend, that is a woman." Law argued back.

"Well there's only one way to find out, Leo, reveal to us what sex you are!" Maury shouted.

Leo held a huge card up, "I am a-"

"Please hurry up!" Lili said face palming herself again.

"Fine, for you Lili, I will take as long as possible." Leo said.

"No, hurry up, we got other sh- I mean stuff to do." Hwoarang said. "I got to get back to my tricycle."

Baek walked over and slapped Hwoarang in the back of the head, "Sit up and act like you have some sense."

"Man I'm tired of you hitting on me!" Hwoarang cried.

"What are you going to do about it?" Baek asked, "Not a goddamn thing, that's what I thought!"

"Please continue Leo." Maury said.

"Well, I am proud to say that I am a GIRL!" Leo cried happily.

Everyone went crazy, the room was filled with "Oh my gosh" and "I told you so!"

Asuka pulled Lili away from the chaos and went outside into the hallway.

"I'm so sorry Lili." Asuka said.

"No no, it's not your fault." Lili sighed, "I never get what I want."

"Umm, don't you always get what you want?" Asuka asked.

"Asuka, don't use logic or state the obvious okay, I'm bitching so let me bitch." Lili sighed. "So can you tell me now what you were about to say?"

"Oh umm, you remember that?" Asuka smiled nervously.

"Yeah, I did so." Lili smiled rubbing Asuka's arm. "Finish."

"Okay, umm Lili I want you to be my one and only girlfriend." Asuka said quickly turning beet red.

"Haha, REALLY?" Lili beamed. "HA, EMILY ROCHEFORT ALWAYS GETS WHAT SHE WANTS!"

Asuka giggled and smiled, "Yeah yeah."

"So, now you have to kiss me to make it official." Lili smiled.

"Oh, okay." Asuka said blushing hard.

Lili puckered her lips and then Asuka kissed her.

"AWWWWWWWWWW!" everyone cooed.

"What the hell, can anyone get any privacy around here?" Asuka yelled blushing hard.

"Yeah! Go mind your own business!" Lili yelled.

"Awwww, they're mad!" everyone cooed again.

Lili and Asuka both sighed and then smiled at each other.

"Oh well, I guess everyone knows now." Lili smiled.

"Ha, yeah." Asuka smiled back.

Lili hugged her girlfriend and then kissed her. Lili got her crush and couldn't be happier. I'm sad to say that this is the final chapter of Lili's Crush. Thank you to all of those who have supported this story from the very beginning. Also, thank you those who have took time in their busy schedules to read this wacky tale. Until next time, live, love, and learn. And stay peachy goodbye!