Okay... I suck. I'm a sucky, sucky writer who sucks. I had written 2 chapters of Never that i was going to post, and another chapter of The Helper, as well as countless other fanfics and poems, and you won't believe what i did. I deleted all the files from my computer. That's right folks, I am officially an idiot. But, I have the never chapters written somewhere so when I find them I'll post them immediately. I hope you can forgive me and review chapter 1 of this fanfic. I wrote all of it in one night, so posts will be regular. Pleeeeeease review for me!

This fanfic, in every chapter there will be The email Bella sends that doesn't get delivered at the beginning. But Alice see's these in a vision, and second half of a chapter is her and all the other Cullen's reactions.

Alice,

You've disappeared, like everything else. Who else can I talk to? I'm lost. When you left...and he left...you took everything with you. But he lied. It's not like he never existed. The absence of him is everywhere I look. It's like a huge hole has been punched through my chest. The bleeding won't stop. But in a way I'm glad...the pain is my only reminder that he was real...that you all were.

In a way... I'm sure I deserve it. If I had been better you would have all stayed, and pain is an extra punishment for me. Part of me wishes that another vampire could come and change me, then I could find you. But... you probably wouldn't want me there would you?

Please reply. I know you'll see this. Or see me writing it. I know you will.

Come back to me Alice.

I miss you, I love you,

Bella.

Alice sat at the antique mahogany table, pen rushing across the paper at lightning speed, eyes unseeing. She sat like that, with all the vampires around her holding their breath, for a full minute. Then, with a gasp, she pulled out of her trance and looked down at what she had drawn. "A letter from Bella," she whispered.

Esme slowly took it, and read it aloud to the group, her eyes pained. "Alice, You've disappeared, like everything else."

"I knew she'd hate me," said Alice, wrapping her arms around Jasper for comfort.

"She doesn't hate you," said Emmett, "but if there's anyone she should hate it my low-life brother up there." he jerked his head towards the ceiling.

"Don't say that," said Esme softly.

"Why not?" said Jasper his lip curling in distaste for his sibling. "It's true."

Rosalie moaned. "Can you shut up and let Esme read?"

"Who else can I talk to? I'm lost. When you left...and he left...you took everything with you. But he lied. It's not like he never existed. The absence of him is everywhere I look. It's like a huge hole has been punched through my chest. The bleeding won't stop. But in a way I'm glad...the pain is my only reminder that he was real...that you all were. And in a way... I'm sure I deserve it."

Cries of objection were heard throughout the room. Even Rosalie looked protestant. The piano that was playing a sad melody upstairs faltered a stop, signaling that Edward had heard the letter too.

"That poor girl," mumbled Carlisle.

"If I had been better you would have all stayed, and pain is an extra punishment for me. Part of me wishes that another vampire could come and change me, then I could find you. But... you probably wouldn't want me there would you?"

"I do," said Alice quietly.

"Same here," agreed Emmett.

"I would want her here, although it has been nice not to want to kill her all the time," Jasper said as he sighed.

"Please reply. I know you'll see this. Or see me writing it. I know you will. Come back to me Alice. I miss you, I love you, Bella."

Not a moment had passed from the end of this letter, but Edward appeared at the top of the stairs with a suitcase in hand and a backpack on his back. Alice stopped him before he reached the bottom.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" she demanded.

"I'm leaving," he said not meeting her eyes, " I've had enough, I'm getting out of here."

"So you're running away?" she said with a harsh laugh. "You coward. Have you seen this?" Alice snatched the letter from Esme and shoved it into her brothers fist. "This is what you've done to her. You've killed her. And she thinks it's her own fault. Aren't you going to go back there like you should? Fix things?"

Edward looked straight into Alice's evil glare. "It's what's best."

Alice did what any person with an ounce of sense would do. She slapped him as hard as her vampiric powers would allow. "That's bullshit," she spat at him, before turning away and storming out the door.